


Dark Sands

by FallenInDreams



Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, F/M, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Jealousy, Mystery, NO rape in this story, Romance, Set mostly in Suna, dark themes, mentions of past rape/dub-con
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-28
Updated: 2018-05-21
Packaged: 2019-04-13 11:38:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 28
Words: 92,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14111547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FallenInDreams/pseuds/FallenInDreams
Summary: GaaSaku. Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.





	1. Reunited

**Author's Note:**

> This is the sequel to The Monster Within. I highly recommend you read it first. This is set almost 2 years later.
> 
> AU differences:  
> Gaara won when Deidara tried to capture him. Suna was demolished and had to be rebuilt. Sakura was sent with others to help with the wounded and rebuilding efforts. Then she returned to the leaf. Sasuke Uchiha died trying to destroy Konoha, and Kakashi is Hokage.  
> And the most important detail… Gaara still has Shukaku. Second most important would have to be that over the last 2-4 years, joint operations between Konoha and Suna have completely wiped out the Akatsuki. Yes, that includes Madara.  
> Also, I'll be writing the immediate aftermath of Gaara raping Sakura in as flashbacks, eventually. This is important, promise. In The Monster Within, Gaara and Sakura were 19, and here they are 21 years old… approximately.  
> 'SHUKAKU'
> 
> For reference: Hitó-Jichi means "hostage"  
> ...

It had been a long two years since he had seen Sakura Haruno, so Gaara Sabaku wasn't sure what to expect upon her return to Suna. Standing patiently at the entrance to his village, he could only wait, knowing she wasn't far away. It had been two years… well it was actually _less_ than two years, but not by much. He had tried to move on, to put his actions behind him, and to anyone who wasn't looking very close, he seemed to be the same person he had always been. But Gaara could never forgive himself for the rash, thoughtless actions that had led to him violating the finest medical ninja in the leaf village.

Sakura had fallen victim to rogue ninja in the desert; her party of ninja separated in a sandstorm, she had found the abandoned temple where Gaara had been meditating. The temple was also known as the Wind Shrine and had been the resting place of Shukaku in the past, trapped in a teakettle. The area where the temple is was once called the Nara Desert, and the Monks who resided there were tasked with guarding the container the wind god had been imprisoned in.

A guard above Gaara called out. "I see them!"

In the distance, four figures were approaching from the direction of the unseen forest that was traversed by ninja travelling between Suna and Konoha. Gaara tensed suddenly, glad that his siblings who were standing on either side and slightly behind him did not seem to notice. Kankuro and Temari both kept their eyes on the figures advancing toward the village hidden in the sand. They were anticipating this arrival eagerly as well it seemed.

Kakashi Hatake was the Hokage and in the interest of co-operation, Gaara had suggested to the allies of the sand to send a squad of leaf ninja to assist in the capture of a group of rogue ninja who were taking over Amegakure. It wouldn't be long before they became a problem; even though Ame wasn't one of the Kage run villages, the additions of these rogue ninja was a threat to the balance of Shinobi numbers that was supposed to be a deterrent to war.

Even after everything else that had happened, the problems went on.

Gaara sighed deeply at that. It wearied him, thinking about all the people out there that seemed to thrive on conflict, and these troublemakers had been giving him headaches as of late. As if he needed more of a reason his mediation was not working lately. Shukaku had not had the strength to control his body for some time, so it resorted to whispering in his ear and enticing him. His attempts to sleep without falling prey to the demon's control were not working. But he didn't want to ask Sakura for help. No, he would not bother her. He couldn't even think of what to say when she arrived, let alone once she was already in the village.

And there she was, dressed in a basic red top with black shorts, a short parted pink skirt, and pink elbow protectors; her gloves and high-heeled boots were both black. Except now, Gaara's eyes travelled along her body not only to notice that her attire was slightly more revealing than he remembered it being two years ago, but that she was clearly still nicely shaped. His eyes lingered on the outline created by her breasts for a moment before redirecting his sight to her face. If at all possible, she had grown more beautiful and though her expressionless was stoic, she had not lost the look of the passionate Kunoichi he had once known, who would lay down her life for those who were precious to her.

Indeed, as she stood alongside Naruto Uzumaki, Shikamaru Nara, and Ino Yamanaka, she greeted Gaara and his siblings with respect. There was no hint in her demeanour whatsoever that she was remembering the time the Kazekage had raped her.

They were in the new council room for less than an hour, being able to reach an amicable arrangement quickly. Naruto Uzumaki, Shikamaru Nara, Ino Yamanaka, and Sakura Haruno were shown to their rooms to rest for the night before the joint operation between the sand and leaf could begin. They needed to be fully rested before setting out.

Sakura had been nervous about returning to Suna, having not seen Gaara for so long. Immediately after that… _incident_ in the Wind Shrine, she had had to continue on to Suna regardless. It had turned out that a medic by the name of Hana Kudamono had had a brilliant notion of incorporating R.E.M sleep into a meditative state that could be used to allow the Kazekage to sleep without letting Shukaku out to wreck havoc. Hana was a new medic, not long out of the Suna Ninja Academy at the time and had taken her inspiration from a paper Sakura had written when the sand had adopted training regimes similar to Konoha years ago.

Hana had the makings of being the greatest medic Suna had ever known; Sakura could see this potential in her. But her skills were still rudimentary, so the young medic had requested the Hokage to send Sakura to Suna, to see if there was anything she could do to speed up the process. It was why Sakura had been heading toward Suna when her squad had been attacked in the desert.

"Are you okay Sakura?" Ino asked her, having already dressed for bed. "You look worried."

They were sharing accommodations, while Naruto and Shikamaru were next door. Suna was very formal about sleeping arrangements separating male and female guests. Sakura knew this from other visits to the wind country.

Sakura nodded her head and forced a smile. "Sure Ino, good night."

"Night forehead."

Sakura rolled her eyes at her friend. "Sleep tight Ino pig."

Really, this banter never seemed to get old between them. Ino blew out the kerosene lamp next to her bed and Sakura did the same for hers. As she got under the covers, her eyes drifted outside, into the desert night. She sighed. Back when she'd met Hana, she was still angry at Gaara. Sure, a part of her had realised that he hadn't been in complete control of his actions, but another part kept asking her why he had _raped_ her. Shukaku was a demon. Even if somehow it had been able to momentarily possess him without him transforming (except for his eyes), wouldn't that have just meant that he'd have _killed_ her instead?

These thoughts had haunted her for the few weeks she'd spent in Suna afterward and for months after she left. But despite her bravado and determination to pretend it had never happened, she _still_ felt nervous and fearful in Gaara's company. She had decided _never_ to tell anyone what had happened, not only because it wasn't entirely Gaara's fault, but because she feared what would happen to the relationship between Konoha and Suna if word got out that the Kazekage had raped her.

Sighing, Sakura rolled away from the window. At least in the morning, she'd be leaving Suna again, and could take her frustration out on the rogue ninja they were here to track and kill or capture.

 

...

 

Gaara could not sleep. He could never sleep. He didn't deserve to.

He had tried to get some paperwork done, and found himself resting his eyes, as they grew heavy from exhaustion. It was just for a moment. He needed to meditate. Hana's work over the last two years, due mostly to Sakura's help, had improved his ability to meditate. But that inner voice that belonged to Shukaku wouldn't leave him be. It refused to give him a moment's peace. So that was why Gaara had not been meditating every day – his guilty conscience. Somehow, in those moments when he had achieved his eagerness and lulled out of his trance, the realisation of what he had done to Sakura had hit him in all its fury.

He remembered immediately, having felt the pinkette beneath him, felt himself still settled inside of her; the demon tortured him with the memory of having hurt her, undressed her, taken pleasure and forced himself onto her very being. Not a day went by when those images did not haunt him.

With that thought, Gaara felt his body rise. He was walking to his balcony, aware of what he was doing, but unable to stop himself. He climbed out of the window, and jumped along the rooftops to the apartment building where V.I.P visitors were always housed. He landed on the railing of the terrace outside the room Sakura was sharing with Ino Yamanaka. Shukaku had brought him here. It had been weeks since the demon had been able to move him without his permission. The fact that this had only happened _now_ , terrified the Kazekage beyond belief. Now the demon wanted him to come here, to stare at the beautiful pinkette through her window. It could make him take her again, and would have if the object of his desires had been alone.

So it released control, whispering in his head.

' **MAYBE NEXT TIME, MY HITÓ-JICHI'**

It had to be because it was Sakura. He didn't feel this way about anybody else.

Gaara stared at the pinkette, trying to stop these residual _urges_. If there was one thing he had learnt, while researching Shukaku more thoroughly after he had raped Sakura two years ago, it was that it lived up to its trickster reputation. He had decided he needed to know if it was him or the demon that had wanted her that way. Dream states with the bijuu while attempting to meditate had helped to fill in the blanks as well.

Shukaku was believed to be the reincarnation of a Sand Priest defeated by the Nara Monk Oraga Nakashimu and imprisoned by him. This was why the Nara Monks were supposed to stop anyone looking to release this spirit; Shukaku could be reborn into the bodies of people killed by the wind and sand, and so his imprisonment in the teakettle after being defeated in battle after having taking over a human prevented him from returning to wreck havoc. The original spirit of Shukaku was rumoured in folklore to have been a Tanuki in disguise, and once trapped, was stored deep beneath the surface structure of the Wind Shrine where only the Nara Monks were supposed to be allowed to venture. According to myth, a Tanuki was a raccoon-dog spirit with power over sandstorms, control over wind, and the ability to manipulate sand.

What the monks hadn't counted on however, were the Shinobi wars, so after the devastation had taken its toll, the monks were all but dead and powerless to intervene when the fourth Kazekage sought to possess the power of the Shukaku.

But the most important information Gaara had been able to find out was the coup de grace for his curiosity. Shukaku was supposed to have had a very active sex life. He wasn't exactly the "god of love", but he was very much as mischievous, playful and _horny_ as the mythological creature he was represented as. Gaara surmised that when he'd raped Sakura a bleed through effect of the natural, sexual rise that Shukaku felt at that moment had directed his actions toward the pleasure centre of his being, rather than simply trying to kill her.

This had brought Gaara to the conclusion that it had been the demon that wanted the pinkette, and not _him_. But somehow, seeing Sakura again had made more than his _desire_ for her return. He was not stupid. He knew he had feelings for her. They had started back during the fallout of Deidara's attack on Suna, but since she clearly didn't return his affections, he hadn't said or done anything about it.

Almost four years – it was a long time to go without telling someone how he felt. But since they lived in different villages and he had heard that she was dating Naruto Uzumaki, Gaara forced himself to put the past behind him. Then of course, there was that stir caused in Konoha when Naruto had been the reason that the Hyuuga heiress had given up her title. Gaara hadn't known when Sakura and Naruto had stopped seeing each other, but his fellow jinchuriki was soon engaged to the blue haired girl Gaara remembered was called Hinata.

This was not long before the incident in the Wind Shrine, so Gaara had had mixed feelings about the fact that Sakura was single again, and encountering her when he was in that delicate state…

Gaara gripped the railing he was crouched on, concentrating. It wasn't Shukaku he was fighting against, but himself this time. He wanted to climb in there, grab her, and throw her up against the wall. His desire to hear her begging for more, and screaming his name was too much to bear. It was just a fantasy after all. She didn't want him that way. He closed his eyes and focused on his breathing exercises. Soon, he was calm enough to leave without disturbing the occupants of the room.

The thing that concerned him now was that Shukaku intended on re-enacting that day in the desert.

 

...


	2. Memories.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> GaaSaku. Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: this chapter contains descriptive death. Not to say that my writing skills are very good with accurate portrayal. But, you have been warned!

The next morning, Sakura Haruno showered, dressed, and ate the breakfast brought to her and her best friend Ino Yamanaka before joining their other two companions, Naruto Uzumaki and Shikamaru Nara outside the apartment building for V.I.P visitors. Suna was warm, all day long, but in the morning, there was this serene breeze that swept through, not ruffling clothes, or hair, but _felt_ nonetheless.

She had avoided this place for almost two years, finally giving in because of the Hokage-sama's orders. She really did _not_ want to be here. She returned her friends' morning greetings and as a group, they all made their way to the village exit, having made arrangements to meet the sand ninja joining them on this mission to Amegakure on their way out of Suna.

A long time ago, Sakura had been fascinated by the life of a sand ninja, when Naruto had asked Kankuro all about it. They had just lost Sasuke to the last attack he would ever make on Konoha and both Kankuro and Temari had come to the leaf as part of a diplomatic mission. In his grief, Naruto had been even more unbearable than usual, while Sakura had simply mourned with a kind of quiet dignity. Everyone had been expecting her to blow up and break down, but she simply had no tears left to shed. Sasuke had chosen his path, and at least this way he was at peace.

' _And I can get on with my life,'_ she thought, readjusting her gloves unnecessarily as they stopped at the village exit.

There were guards above their heads, but a slight wind had picked up, half obscuring them from view and Naruto smirked at Sakura as though he had just figured her out finally, and the last eight years had never happened.

"So," he said, drawing the word out. "I hear you didn't want to come on this mission."

The only person who had known this was Ino, though Sakura had not explained to her _why_. She glanced at her before turning back to face Naruto. Even Shikamaru looked surprised at her.

"That is none of your business Naruto," she said coolly, hoping to dissuade his interest without getting into a huge discussion about it.

They were still waiting on Temari and _her_ team, and Sakura didn't want the sister of the Kazekage to find out about her reservations. She wanted to put the reason behind her reluctance _behind_ her, but it kept cropping up when she least expected it. She didn't think she had changed much since that day in the Wind Shrine, but both Naruto and Ino had often told her there was something different about her. Ino had continually told her she was a jittery mess, while Naruto had started to be concerned about her when she stopped pummelling him into the ground every time he spoke before thinking. Even Sai had eventually caught on, calling her an uptight cow. Of her closest friends, only Kakashi had noticed without saying anything, that single eyebrow of his raising in surprise while he remained silent. He was the Hokage, and so his concern for her welfare was not just as a friend. But she couldn't tell any of them why – _ever_.

And so the façade went on.

Naruto lost his smirk, confused now. " _Why_ didn't you want to come?"

She sighed, annoyed. "Naruto, it doesn't matter. Shut it would you?"

She still _felt_ like pummelling him. That urge hadn't gone away. But somehow, being on the receiving end of such abusive and reckless violence had stopped her from raising her hand to anyone else, even Naruto. She just couldn't bring herself to do that again. Images of Gaara shoving her hard against stone and _feeling_ the force of his attack fracture her left scapula haunted her every time she even _thought_ of hitting the blonde knucklehead.

' **You need therapy.'**

She ignored her inner voice and sighed again, staring out over the desert.

"Well anyway," Ino said, perhaps to hide her guilt at letting Sakura's reluctance to assist their allies slip. "We should probably keep that to ourselves, okay Naruto?"

He wanted to protest some more, but under her icy glare, he relented. Shikamaru groaned, rubbing the back of his head, troubled. "It's none of our business anyway, just as long as it doesn't interfere with the mission."

"Shikamaru, how could you even suggest that?" Ino asked, incensed. "As if Sakura would even do _that_!"

He didn't respond and the blonde Kunoichi was even more infuriated.

"Do _what_?" Kankuro's voice broke Sakura out of her lulled state and she noticed Gaara standing behind him, immediately.

"Don't ask," Shikamaru warned him.

Behind Kankuro, Temari and the rest of their team waited. Sakura recognised Matsuri, but not the dark haired boy standing next to her. He seemed to be the same age as her, and kept furtively glancing at her. Perhaps a crush.

"Sakura, Naruto, Ino, and Shikamaru," Temari said, coming up to them, "you remember Matsuri, right? And this young man is Rokka. They'll be accompanying us. They're from the squad that first spotted the unusual activity around Ame. They'll know what we're looking for."

Sakura bowed slightly, though silently, to them. Naruto seemed excited, while Ino looked politely intrigued and Shikamaru only nodded his head in response. Matsuri and this Rokka were the only ones not Jōnin – they were Chūnin.

"Well," Kankuro said jovially. "Shall we be off?"

"See ya Gaara!" Naruto called happily, earning himself a slight smile from the Kazekage as the two squads turned away from Suna.

Sakura couldn't help herself. She had had no intention of meeting the placid stare of those pale eyes, but they were just there, reeling her gaze in. He looked calm, but she felt a strange vibe of longing off of him, like he was waiting impatiently for something to happen.

Gaara had used every trick he could think of, from silent tantrums to outright ignoring his siblings. He did _not_ want to see them off at the village exit. Sakura would be there, and he had resolved to himself that he would avoid her at all costs. She couldn't be alone with him ever again, and he intended to make their contact only both professional and minimal from now on. This was the only way to make sure she was safe. He would not give Shukaku an opening to take advantage of her. He would rather die.

But both Kankuro and Temari had become insulted by his actions, thinking his reluctance had more to do with _them_. Their calculating stares and infuriated glares had won the argument and he'd accompanied them after all. Still, they seemed to sense he was uncomfortable, and so they didn't push him any further than that. The walk down to the village exit had almost _killed_ him. It was only for less than ten seconds, but seeing Sakura again brought out all the emotion and urges she always invoked in him. He had been wanting to avoid that, dammit!

He returned to his office, intending on getting some work done. At least with Sakura out of Suna, he could concentrate. Shukaku was silent, though waiting patiently for the return of the pink haired Kunoichi. Gaara then decided to meditate, once his paperwork was done, returning to his bedroom and sitting on the floor, leaning against the bed for support. It didn't matter what position he took, as long as he was comfortable.

Hana had recently tried to get him to cut off his chakra flow in an attempt to prevent the demon chakra from coming through. She believed that this was how Shukaku could control him. It was, according to her, through the clear, wind based chakra that the demon possessed. So, with a chakra suppressant tag on his skin, Gaara attempted to meditate, knowing all the demon could do was enter his subconscious. Still, he was wary, not certain exactly _how_ it was that these images were coming to him, regardless of his precaution.

They avoided the nearby border to River Country as they trekked through the desert toward Amegakure. Almost every ninja nation was having trouble with the political relations with Yuga due mostly to the fact that their village was no longer "hidden". But more recently, the problems had escalated and the ninja of Yuga had been increasing the number of their patrols, warding off other Shinobi from the country, not just the area where their village resided. The Hokage was concerned, as was the Kazekage, but it didn't appear, at least for now, that it was connected to what was going on with Ame.

Sakura groaned inwardly, glancing east, toward their border, remembering the trip from Konoha to Suna. They had expected to sense the Yuga ninja, but seeing as though they were taking their normal route through their neighbour's land and not detouring anywhere near the formerly hidden village, Sakura had not anticipated any trouble. Still, the stares they were getting were not appreciated. The masked ninjas watching them made no effort to conceal themselves and followed the Konoha party all the way to the border, as though escorting them. She had no doubt that they were making certain that their leaf neighbours stayed on the path and didn't cause any problems.

But everyone knew that the relationship between Konoha and Suna was stronger than it had ever been, so there was no confusion as to where they had been headed.

"Still troubled?" Ino asked her, running alongside her best friend.

Temari was nearby so Sakura only nodded.

The sand Kunoichi glanced at her. "What's the problem?"

"No problem," Ino said, chuckling in that high-pitched way she did that made anyone realise she was lying.

Temari rolled her eyes. "I can see that."

"Nothing to do with the mission," Sakura said firmly.

"If you have a bad feeling it _could_ be about the mission," Temari said. She glanced at Shikamaru. "Maybe someone should go ahead, scout out the area before we head in."

He nodded back at her. "Smart. I suggest Kankuro and Ino. Their styles are better suited. Meanwhile, Naruto?"

"Yeah!"

Temari chuckled at his enthusiasm as Shikamaru continued, "can you create some shadow clones and transform them into the rest of us to accompany Kankuro and Ino?"

"Why not just have him create copies for us all?" Sakura asked.

"We need to split up," Shikamaru said. "If either of the two teams encounters a hostile force, the copies won't last as long as the real things. There would be no point in keeping us all in the same place."

"Then I'm going with them," she said. When he opened his mouth to disagree, she cut him off. "There are only two of them, but six of us, it's not exactly even. They'd need more to increase their chances."

Shikamaru smiled slightly. He couldn't argue with her logic. "Alright, Naruto, do it."

Naruto created five shadow clones and transformed four of them into perfect duplicates of Temari, Shikamaru, Matsuri, and Rokka. "You know what to do," he told them.

He turned to face Kankuro, Ino and Sakura, who were about to depart with his clones. "If I'm forced into an extended fight with Sage Mode, which I doubt will be necessary, a clone will disappear; no idea which one. This more than likely, won't happen, but just in case, be aware of this at all times."

They nodded in agreement and the first team picked up their pace. Temari slowed down to allow them to increase the distance, and the rest of her team copied her. She watched Sakura until the other team was out of sight and wondered about her. Naruto had mentioned, shortly after they'd arrived in Suna yesterday, that Sakura wasn't the girl Temari remembered. He had no idea why, as the pinkette refused point blank to answer his or anyone else's queries on the subject.

But Sakura's closest friends had noticed the change shortly after her return to Konoha less than two years ago. And the last place the pinkette had been was Suna. Temari realised something then, glancing at Naruto as he kept his determined eyes on their target.

' _Could it be that whatever the reason is is why she's so troubled right now?'_

' _Sakura…'_

He was in a room; dimly lit, it stank of human waste, and was bare, except for the chains against the brick wall behind him. He remembered they had shackled him for two days, torturing him, interrogating him for information, not knowing about the demon within. The war within himself had already started. How was he going to get out of here if Shukaku wouldn't give him peace of mind?

His jailers brought a young girl into the cell, thinking he would care if they killed her in cold blood right in front of him. But the only one that mattered to him was the Kunoichi who had been on his mind for days now. She was all he could think of.

' **I ALREADY TOLD YOU TO FORGET ABOUT THAT SLUT.'**

The demon didn't care; it had never felt what it was like to love. It could never understand. Gaara watched himself suffer, remembering what it was like to be caged, like some animal, but not sure _who_ this suffering man really was. This was just a dream after all.

He had never been imprisoned in a place like this, or at all. For years, his father had sent ninja after him, to assassinate him, not imprison him. And instead of being angered enough to kill the fourth Kazekage, he had found the challenge of fending off these attacks a comforting one. It had taught him how to survive − that and Shukaku's stubbornness. The demon knew if its vessel died, it too would perish.

So what was this image of a dirty, ragged man that looked too much like him to be a coincidence? Could Shukaku see into the future? No, that was not it. This _felt_ like the past. Perhaps a memory.

He could not move, the pain in his limbs were due to an injury. His jailers were ruthless, and he knew that once they got the information they were looking for, he was expendable. But this wasn't where it was all going to end. He had a demon on his side, what did they have?

A bitter smile twisted his features and he looked up as the door to his cell was unlocked and opened cautiously. The man was just bringing him food. He was perhaps fifteen years old and trembled slightly as he lay the plate down. Gaara had to remember that these people had been told he was a monster, even if they didn't know _why_.

As the boy turned to leave hastily, Gaara took the opportunity and pounced. His chakra was not as depleted as they had thought, and he'd used the last few hours since their most recent assault on his body to rejuvenate. Okay, so the demon had helped as well.

The boy screamed, the beast behind him ripping through his flesh, ripping the vertebrae of his spine away from his body in one quick, fluid motion. The cry of pain lasted a mere moment before the body toppled to the floor, lifeless. In an instant, Gaara muffled his guard and tore his tongue from his mouth before he could raise any more alarms. More guards were approaching, he could sense them.

Two dead, fifteen more to go.

Gaara watched this ragged stranger kill them, as though he were both the killer and an unseen spectator. But he felt the blood as if it were his own. It showered him with its warmth and he was reminded of the heat and passion of a lover.

' _Sakura…'_


	3. Encounter.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All flashbacks will be in Italic, and clearly marked.

– **Flashback –**

" _Medic!"_

_The unfamiliar voice broke Sakura Haruno out of her unconscious state. She'd just arrived in Suna, badly hurt and in the arms of the Kazekage. She looked up, but he refused to meet her eyes. For a moment she forgot how she had ended up this way and once the memory of him shoving her up against the stone masonry in the Wind Shrine came flooding back to her, she struggled in his arms, panicking._

_But he held her against her will, carried her into the Suna hospital, and toward help. The warmth of his grip sent her senses into overdrive and spasms of pain arched her body. Something was inside her; pain, like a worm, wriggling through her, tearing through her. She cried out, her arms clawing at the Kazekage as the pain deepened. She felt like she was dying._

_And then quite suddenly, she felt calm. A foreign hand on her head and chest was healing her and the chakra felt warm and inviting. She could feel her troubles just fading away. When the Kazekage left the room, she let her guard down and allowed sleep to overwhelm her._

_When she finally woke, someone was whispering nearby. She shifted softly, but they didn't notice. Sakura rolled her head to the side and spotted another hospital bed nearby. On it, she recognised the Konoha Anbu operative, sleeping peacefully. His name was Tonetsu. He was injured, but for the most part, seemed to be recovering nicely. She sighed, relieved, and turned her head in the other direction. Nothing. She couldn't see if Kima or Hawk were nearby and frowned, trying to sit up. But the exhaustion and a stabbing pain in her abdomen wouldn't let her up._

_Sakura moaned softly, drawing the attention of the two nearby medics and they rushed over to her._

" _Lady Haruno," one of them said respectively, "you are still injured, you need to rest."_

_It felt so weird to her, to be on the receiving end, as her visits to Suna had only seen her healing_ _ them _ _. Fate had turned the tables on her apparently. She grabbed the one who had spoken, remembering him now, from her last visit. His name was Shima. He was the second cousin of the head of the medical core._

" _Shima," she said softly. "The Kazekage…"_

_He nodded to her, not understanding. "He brought you in here and then left immediately to personally track down the rest of your team. Tonetsu over there is resting just fine." He indicated to the sleeping Anbu she had already noticed. "Don't worry, I'm sure the rest will be found, just give it time."_

_He smiled at her as her body started to betray her desire to stay awake. The Kazekage was tracking down her team? Why would he do that, after…?_

– **End Flashback –**

X X X

"I'm worried about Sakura," Temari said to Naruto, shortly after the team had split up.

She was currently running alongside Naruto Uzumaki, Shikamaru Nara, Rokka Namura, Matsuri Hamanaku, and three of Naruto's shadow clones that took the forms of their other companions (Sakura, Ino, and Kankuro). She hadn't introduced the two Chunin by their full names to the leaf ninja, which she realised in hindsight had been slightly disrespectful. Still, she rarely went by Sabaku herself, so it seldom occurred to her to add family names to introductions.

"She's tough," Naruto said. "She can handle this."

"That's not what I meant."

Shikamaru glanced at her in that typical, lazy way of his. "Because she doesn't seem herself?"

Temari nodded her head and Naruto lowered his eyes onto the ground self-consciously. Matsuri and Rokka remained silent, but were listening.

"There _is_ something wrong!" Temari groaned loudly.

"We don't know what it is," Shikamaru said, realising she was about to burst. "Just that she didn't want to come here."

"Shikamaru!" Naruto roused on him. "That was her business!"

The cloud watcher shrugged. "I know, but it still is. If it affects this mission, Temari deserves to know that her _friend_ is not comfortable. It would be so troublesome in the middle of battle."

"That's what you guys were talking about when we were about to leave Suna," Temari deduced. "Don't worry Naruto, I won't say anything, and both Matsuri and Rokka are good at keeping secrets."

The two Chunin nodded their heads respectfully. The blonde knucklehead sighed, relenting.

"It's not that I don't trust you Temari," he said, "it's just that Sakura's been this way for a long time."

"I know, you told me, remember?"

"Oh, right," he chuckled.

He had told her yesterday that Sakura hadn't been herself for almost two years.

"So," Matsuri said, curious. "No theories as to why Lady Haruno didn't want to be here?"

Naruto shook his head as Rokka frowned at them, keeping his eyes on the horizon. They were supposed to be keeping their guard up. But as Shikamaru rolled his eyes at the male Chunin, Rokka realised their guards _were_ up. He couldn't wait until he was good enough to be a Jounin, and lost his disrespectful expression. Well _he_ needed to concentrate, so listened in, without taking part.

"It clearly started in Suna," Shikamaru said, "but she's so tight lipped, even Ino doesn't know."

"Do you remember anything odd from two years ago, Lady Temari?" Matsuri asked.

All eyes were on her (except Rokka's) and the blonde Kunoichi shook her head. "No. But we all know she was attacked by rogue ninja, along with an Anbu squad, and I remember seeing the state she was in. I've never seen someone so traumatised."

' _Except for Gaara, years ago, when he was still calling Shukaku his mother.'_

"Did you tell the Kazekage?" Shikamaru asked.

"Yeah, but Gaara took it from there. I have no idea what happened to her."

"We should ask Kazekage-sama when we get back," Matsuri said. "If whatever happened is still affecting her, we are duty bound to do everything we can to help her."

Shikamaru groaned. "More work? What a drag."

Temari chuckled and Naruto rolled his eyes.

"We sound like a bunch of gossiping Yamanakas, so let's just let it go, okay?" He said.

"And don't tell Ino that Naruto made fun of her family," Shikamaru said wisely.

He could already see, in the direction of Amegakure, a soft, indistinct column of grey coloured smoke, as though there was an encampment up ahead. It would seem they were expected.

X X X

Sakura Haruno was worried. Okay, she'd been worried from the moment the Hokage, Kakashi Hatake had ordered her to accompany the squad heading to Suna, but _this_ was different. Why would the ninja in Ame suddenly start building up, if not for war? She couldn't stop the strange feeling that this was not their intention. On either side of her, Ino Yamanaka and Kankuro were watching for traps and ambushes, the clones Naruto had created to look like the rest of the group doing the same thing. She had to remind herself they really weren't Shikamaru Nara, Temari, Matsuri, Rokka, or Naruto Uzumaki. The blonde knucklehead had perfected his shadow clone and transformation jutsus on a scale no-one had done before. He truly _was_ his father's son.

Sakura glanced at Ino and Kankuro. Only Naruto, Hinata, Sakura, and Kakashi knew that Naruto Uzumaki was the son of the late, fourth Hokage – as far as _they_ knew. When the pinkette had found out, she'd been so dumbfounded that she hadn't noticed that Naruto was mocking her with one of his trademark grins. He had known for quite some time so he was blasé about the whole thing by that point. It had fascinated him to no end how _she'd_ reacted to the information; he had told her that _his_ reaction was worse, but he wouldn't say _how_ much worse. This of course, flared up her curiosity, but he wouldn't relent.

Time passed, as it always did, and they left the desert behind, finally travelling into the neighbouring land. It had taken more than a day and they rested at the border before heading in. If they were attacked, they would need to keep their strength up, after all. Sakura spent the time trying to think about the best way to approach this situation. She was a decent strategist, though not as good as Shikamaru, or even Temari, but she believed that an anticipation of an ambush was a sound tactic. She relayed this to Ino and Kankuro and they agreed. The party then travelled in a line, with the transformed clones taking up the front and rear most positions, with Kankuro, Ino, and then Sakura in the middle. It wasn't perfect, but it would have to do.

It wasn't long before the assumption of an ambush proved true.

"Stop," Kankuro said softly and they all complied.

Sakura had felt it at the same time. They weren't alone. As the forerunners of this mission, they were also the bait, in case the Ame ninja decided to attack them. Sakura shifted her back to Ino's, pulling out her kunai as her fellow teammates made similar movements. They were only here to test the Ame Shinobi, to see how they reacted to foreign ninja near their territory (the capture or kill order was secondary this time, but they intended to capture one of them closer to Ame itself). Normally the Shinobi of another village were well within their rights to defend their territory, but the treaty stated that they could only attack any other ninja within a mile radius, and only if they believe them to be a threat.

But they had only recently crossed the border, so any attack directed toward them would show them how seriously these ninja took the treaty. If the rogues _were_ indeed up to something, they were about to attack. Sakura lifted her kunai to deflect several enemy blades, receiving her answer.

Ino grunted behind her. " _Idiots_!"

Kankuro's puppets had yet to make an appearance, and Sakura realised he was trying to draw the enemy toward them, to get them close before trapping them in. But a moment later, as they sensed the chakra around them building, he bent down, holding the scrolls out before him and summoned them.

"Crow, Black Ant, Salamander!"

Kankuro attached the chakra strings and got to work. The Black Ant and Crow disappeared as the enemy came at them. There were four of them, but Sakura could sense their confidence, and figured there were more in hiding. They bore the Ame insignia on their headbands and wore their distinctive ninja uniforms. At least they didn't have to guess _who_ their attackers were. And none of them were masked, the glint in their eyes _very_ clear.

"Distract them," Kankuro said, and Sakura and Ino nodded, the clones mimicking the motion.

He jumped up and out of the way, preparing as Salamander formed its shield to protect his companions. The clones of Temari, Naruto, Shikamaru, Matsuri, and Rokka darted in all directions as more ninja emerged from the safety of the trees around them. This wasn't a forest, like the one between the land of wind and Konoha, but it was cover enough. At least the sparseness allowed for a larger battlefield. The clones engaged the new enemy (numbering six) with kunai and senbon, while Sakura and Ino attacked the four who had first appeared.

Sakura threw out her arm again as the angry face of the enemy ninja bore down on her, pressing his kunai to hers in an attempt to throw her off balance. She shifted her weight, forcing chakra into her feet to keep her balance. She was stronger than he clearly believed. Was it the pink hair?

' _Sakura…'_

A voice in her head startled her and she almost lost her grip. It was a low tone, mesmerising, and deep. It sounded like… Gaara. But that was impossible – he was still in Suna!

Ignoring the voice, she kicked out, hitting the Ame Shinobi in the shin. He lowered his kunai and she swiped out at him, slashing his clothes. A long, red mark appeared on his chest as she pierced skin. He was shocked, taking a moment to realise she had turned her kunai into a chakra scalpel. It had torn straight through his uniform, but the wound, while effective, was not that deep.

' _Sakura…'_

She lost her triumphant feeling, frustrated and tried to block out that voice. She was definitely losing it. The rogue came at her again, this time angrier, but sloppier. He wasn't used to being the one bleeding, it would seem. A sudden desire flooded Sakura's senses. She wanted to tear this man apart with her bare hands. She shook herself, the image that had suddenly appeared in her mind of his body ripped apart and bleeding out fading from her mind. Where the _hell_ had that come from?

She glanced at Ino, who hadn't noticed, and sighed with relief. The blonde was holding her own well enough. They had fought alongside Kankuro before, so they knew what he was up to the moment he started calling out his jutsu.

"Poison Mist Inferno: Consecutive Needle Combo!"

Sakura and Ino didn't bother avoiding the attack. Salamander's shield could withstand incredible impacts, as well as guard against poison attacks. It rose to deflect it from the two Kunoichi. Ino spun around as Sakura did, with the puppet behind them. The clones were running toward them and at the last moment, jumped up, and out of the way as Sakura slammed her chakra fist into the ground.

"Remind me not to piss you off," the clone of Temari said.

Sakura had to remind herself it was actually a clone of Naruto.

The combination of the poison jutsu and the earth shattering was fatal to the ninja who had been fighting the clones, but there were still four others. It was the reason Kankuro had made the Black Ant disappear at the beginning of the fight (the Crow had since reappeared). He loved forcing the enemy into a corner, where the Black Ant was waiting. He pulled on the chakra strings as the remaining Ame ninja jumped back to avoid the poison.

They fell backwards and straight into the waiting belly of the Black Ant and were sealed up tight.

"Secret Black Move: Iron Maiden!"

Kankuro loved this part. He skewered the enemy, and made a mental note to use a better cleaner for the mess it had made inside the Black Ant and on Crow. He always likened this trapping puppet to a beast, swallowing its prey whole. He sighed, realising he was enjoying it _too_ much. They all relaxed as the puppets dispersed and only the enemy bodies lay strewn over the battlefield. But Kankuro didn't liken _that_ to a battle. He had fought alongside Ino and Sakura enough times that it was more like a well rehearsed dance. No enemy had ever escaped their combined attacks, not that Ino got to use _her_ jutsu this time. He shot an apologetic look at her when he realised he had stolen the show. Sometimes he just got carried away with his puppets.

Ino smiled slightly at him, though irked, to show he was forgiven. She was definitely going to show him up, next time.

"Looks like they don't put much stock in the treaty after all," the clone of Naruto said.

Kankuro snorted softly. "You know as well as I do that a treaty is not absolute. The past has taught us that much. War teaches us our folly, but it would seem these missing-nin have yet to learn _theirs_."

"Such wisdom," Ino said, surprised. "Did Temari tell you that?"

"No," he said, a slight tinge of pink on his skin.

All of the clones laughed along with Ino, but Sakura ignored them, staring down at the dead bodies on the ground. It wasn't over; she could sense the eyes watching them, but could not sense where or who they were. The second group had yet to catch up, and she worried for them. They should've caught up by now. She tuned back into the conversation as Kankuro relayed yet more words of wisdom.

"It isn't always the strongest ninja that wins the fight."

Sakura looked up as the Naruto clone glanced at her. It was so surreal to her that Kankuro would say this. Ino inhaled softly, catching on a moment later and also glanced at Sakura. Her friends were sweet, but the concerned look on their faces was unnecessary. She stared down at the dead rogue ninja, the memory of another bloodied enemy coming to her.

– **Flashback –**

_Naruto was kneeling on the ground, Konoha in ruins amongst them, but the fight was over. Sasuke had attacked them and failed, at great cost. Sakura watched him, suddenly cut off from her emotions. She was beaten, bloodied and moments from passing out, but at least_ _ she _ _would survive. There was silence all around, and a soft wind ruffled her clothes, but she kept her eyes on those bright blue ones._

_Naruto continued to stare at her, half ignoring the limp body in his arms. It was Sasuke. His body was dead, broken, and blemished with his blood. He had just taken his last breath and fallen into Naruto's waiting arms, as Sakura stumbled and fell backward. She was lucky to be alive._

_The silence between them grew, as Naruto's expression was a mixture of regret, horror, and silent pleading. But he somehow managed to keep the relief on his face from fading completely. He was so upset, having lost his best friend, knowing he would never be able to save him, and looking at the pinkette he still wanted to spend the rest of his life with staring at him as though this was just an ordinary day was tearing him apart. She could see it on him, clear as day._

_Sakura had hardened her heart to this, not wanting to deal with the repercussions of Sasuke's death. She felt faint and in an instant, Naruto had laid Sasuke down, jumped up, and landed lithely behind Sakura to support her as she fell unconscious._

– **End Flashback –**

Sakura echoed Kankuro's words mechanically. "It isn't always the strongest ninja that wins the fight."

' _Sakura…'_

She sighed. That voice was not as creepy as what had happened the day Sasuke Uchiha had died.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I gave Rokka and Matsuri last names. He's an OC, and her surname is not mentioned in the canon… as far as I know.


	4. Assumptions.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

– **Flashback –**

_Naruto Uzumaki stood in front of the Hokage, biting his bottom lip to keep from saying something stupid. He was done with the ridiculous antics he had been so well known for. Sure, he still whined when given a mission he didn't want, but the days when he would sit on the floor, pout and hold his breath until he turned blue in the face were gone._

_Kakashi Hatake saw right through him of course, but the blonde was standing by his promise. Sasuke was dead, the Uchiha clan was officially wiped out of existence. Madara didn't count of course. The long lived Uchiha was on his last days anyway. Naruto wanted to step up the hunt for the last Sharingan wielder (not including Kakashi), and was prepared to risk his own dream of being Hokage to do it._

_He remembered that he had always told everyone that no matter what happened, he was definitely going to be Hokage, but ever since Kakashi took office, he'd stopped saying this. The desire to fulfil this dream had not waned, just his need to proclaim it every time the thought crossed his mind. They had all lost so much in the Fourth Shinobi War, and sick and tired of the losses and sacrifices, he had decided to spend less time worrying about the future and just living for now._

_Of course, he could only do this once Madara Uchiha was dead._

" _Are you sure about this Naruto?" Kakashi asked. "Do you really want this on record?"_

_Naruto nodded his head. "It needs to be done, Hokage-sama. There's no reason to delay it."_

_The copy ninja-turned-Hokage was solemn about this, only now turning his good eye on the two women standing on either side of the knucklehead. Sakura Haruno stood quietly on Naruto's right, while Ino Yamanaka was more stern looking than usual, standing to his left. There was no-one else in the room, just like they had decided when informing the Hokage about their decision. Kakashi admired their loyalty and determination, but questioned_ _ why _ _Naruto wanted to proclaim this to the whole world._

_It had to be Sakura. The pinkette that Naruto still had feelings for; she couldn't face this, her head down and tilted to the side. She was the only one of them not participating in this conversation, Ino having started it by being the first to address Kakashi as the Hokage. Since then, only Naruto and Kakashi had spoken._

" _Then you are all agreed on this?" Kakashi asked, receiving a nod from both Naruto and Ino._

" _Sakura?" He asked._

_She tilted her head toward him slightly, and then glanced at Naruto. The blonde Shinobi wondered if she hated him now._

" _We've agreed, Hokage-sama," Naruto said respectfully._

_Kakashi sighed, not happy with this. "Okay. I'll personally inform the other Kages and address the rest of Konoha this afternoon. It will go on official record that on the twenty-eighth of March you, Naruto Uzumaki, killed Sasuke Uchiha."_

– **End Flashback –**

At the very same moment that the squad that consisted of Kankuro, Ino Yamanaka, Sakura Haruno and five clones of Naruto's that he had transformed to look like the remainder of the joint sand and leaf team had dealt with their trouble, Naruto Uzumaki sensed his team were also not alone. Naruto, Temari, and the Chunin sand ninjas called Matsuri and Rokka, along with three transformed clones, came to a halt when the knucklehead called for them to stop.

The border to the land of rivers was nearby, but they had yet to enter the country that held the village hidden in rain. Surely there were no Ame ninjas nearby? They were still technically in wind country. Naruto looked around as the group formed a stance with the ability to defend and attack at the same time. There were definitely ninja nearby. Their chakra signals were strong. But whoever they were, they were approaching from both the direction of Amegakure and river country. Perhaps they had joined forces.

No, that made no sense. It _had_ to be all Ame ninja. So this meant that they had been waiting for them all along. Naruto's concern was quickly verified with the arrival of two dozen ninja, all wearing the Ame headbands. And none of their symbols was crossed out, like what was common for rogues. This was bad. Stains on some of their knees showed they had been kneeling on a grassy area nearby for quite awhile.

Naruto readied himself, pulling out his kunai as Temari grunted unappreciatively.

"Idiots," she said.

Rokka and Matsuri were back to back, with Shikamaru, Naruto, and Temari forming a triangle, their backs to the Chunin. The clones stood together, in a similar formation.

"Stay calm," Temari told the younger ninja.

"Y-yes, Lady Temari," Rokka stuttered.

Shikamaru spread his shadows out, capturing four enemies in less than five seconds, performing his ultimate jutsu to turn the shadows into weapons as deadly as any kunai. Amidst the screaming, Matsuri's rope javelin swung over her head and she aimed, missing one Ame ninja, but redirecting the rope to catch another one; it swung around his neck and clamped tightly, cutting off his air supply. Rokka was darting forward, under the rope to fend off the enemies trying to free their comrade, his kunai deflecting more kunai as the ninja caught in the rope javelin slumped forward, dead.

Temari used her fan on the six Shinobi heading straight for her, enjoying the feel of the wind, as well as the mumblings from Shikamaru as it interfered with his shadow jutsu. Meanwhile, Naruto was also enjoying himself, moving faster than any other ninja here. He made his Rasengan for the hell of it, and slammed several ninja into each other. The knucklehead was having so much fun, he didn't notice that one of the ninja who had gotten past Shikamaru thanks to Temari's jutsu, was darting around to attack on his blindside.

It was then of course, in a very timely fashion, that their party was joined by the rest of the joint sand and leaf squad.

"Naruto!"

The pinkette seemed to come out of nowhere, darting in between Naruto and the Ame ninja, her chakra fists hitting the enemy square in the face. The kunai in the Shinobi's hand was an inch from Naruto's heart before he was flung backward, through the air.

"Thanks Sakura."

"Yeah well, pay attention next ti –"

Her words were cut off and she fell forward, stumbling into Naruto, a look of shock and pain on her face.

"Sakura!" Ino called.

But Kankuro got there first, his Crow puppet darting forward to skewer the enemy who had gotten in behind the pink haired Kunoichi. Sakura felt the heat of the blood on her back. It had missed her heart, the kunai still sticking out of her back, _painfully_ close to her spine. She bit back the urge to groan in pain, her grip on Naruto tightening.

"Hang on," Rokka said, as Naruto went to pull it out. "Let me make sure it didn't hit anything vital."

"Huh?"

"He's a medical ninja," Kankuro said, having turned away to deflect a volley of kunai.

Naruto nodded to the young Chunin, and Rokka checked the area of the wound as Sakura stayed obediently still, though her body fought to shudder. One of the clones landed next to Naruto.

"I'll help here, you go, fight."

Naruto nodded to the version of himself and left Sakura in his very capable hands as Rokka made the decision to remove the kunai after all.

"Hold her still," the Chunin told the clone. "This is going to hurt her and I need to start healing straight away."

The real Naruto entered sage mode, turning to face the enemy. He was pissed off! The clone fighting beside Temari, who looked like Temari disappeared as Naruto transformed, and she grunted as the enemy charging toward the clone had just fallen straight through the light cloud created by the dispersal. She couldn't help but find that amusing.

It was chaos, with seven clones, as well as Naruto, Shikamaru, Temari, Ino, Matsuri, and Kankuro fighting alongside each other. Kankuro's Crow puppet continued to attack, while his other team mates fought with kunai. Deciding to restore some order to this chaos, Temari yelled at the top of her lungs.

"Out of the way!"

All except the clones, who stayed put to keep the enemy where they were, jumped up or backward, out of the way. Temari opened her iron fan to its full width, bit on her thumb, spread her blood over the fan, and then shouted again.

"Summoning Blade Dance!"

Kamatari, the one eyed weasel, erupted from the fan, carrying a scythe and slicing through the enemy. The clones still fighting dispersed, holding onto as many of the Ame ninja as they could, to bring them down with them. Temari aimed the jutsu away from the desert as best she could, the resulting dust storm raging over the border and into the land of rivers.

"Oops," she said cheekily.

The messed up terrain was the least of their problems, really.

"Troublesome," Shikamaru said, rubbing the back of his head gingerly.

Temari roused on him but their bickering was ignored by everyone else. The blonde Kunoichi called him a lazy assed whinger, and unruffled, Shikamaru just sighed deeply and rattled off the reasons she reminded him of his mother.

Ino joined Rokka, looking over his work with Sakura's wound, and finishing off as he started to sweat.

"Sorry," he murmured.

"Don't sweat it," she said, and finished as Sakura closed her eyes.

"Look," Matsuri pointed.

There was an Ame Shinobi, still moving. He was dazed, confused, and bleeding. Naruto pounced, knocking him out. He didn't kill him, realising this mission was over now. At least they had the capture part done. And of course, proof that Ame wasn't keeping to the treaty. He tied the enemy ninja up.

The blonde knucklehead scoffed. "Ino, stabilize the Ame ninja, we need to head back to Suna."

"So soon?" Rokka asked.

"Yes Rokka," Temari said. "Sakura is injured and we have a missing-nin in our custody. We don't need to do any more than this."

"They're protecting their borders aggressively," Kankuro said.

"We'd just be starting an inter-village incident if we try again and get too close to Ame." Shikamaru reasoned. "Still, how many ninja can they actually have guarding the borders, even if they _do_ have more than the treaty allows?"

"I'm _sorry_ ," Temari said, annoyed. "Are you suggesting we charge in there, right now?"

He made a distinctly unimpressed sound. "No."

"Whatever," Kankuro said, as Temari opened her mouth to snap again. "You're bickering like an old married couple, so either drop the subject or start making out, right now."

Temari went red and turned away from him while Shikamaru sighed, bored. Naruto just shook his head at them.

"Come on, let's go."

He lifted Sakura up into his arms as the last of his clones finally dispersed and carried Sakura all the way through the desert and into the Suna infirmary. She was alive, and hopefully didn't need surgery.

X X X

Temari knocked on the door to Gaara's office, Naruto, and Ino standing behind her. They were the closest to the pinkette and deserved to be here when she questioned her brother. She couldn't believe that Gaara would know something about Sakura that her best friends didn't, but she knew from personal experience that sometimes it was easier to tell secrets to people who didn't know you very well, or at all.

"Come in," Gaara's deep voice called out.

Temari pushed the door open and the Kazekage looked up from his paperwork, surprised. The shock was momentary however, as he returned to his usual bored expression as the three ninja in his office closed the door behind them as they entered.

"Kazekage-sama," Ino bowed respectfully, as did Temari, though silently.

Naruto grinned. "Hey there."

Gaara nodded his head. He didn't need to ask what they were doing here. He waited for them to explain it themselves.

"Gaara," Temari said uncomfortably, "we wanted to ask you about Sakura…"

She glanced at Ino as she let that sentence trail away from her.

Ino cleared her throat. "You see, she's been acting weird for two years, but even more so since coming back here, where we're sure this all started, and being the Kazekage well…"

Why was this so hard to just ask? They had rehearsed this, in case Gaara did know, but it was easier in another room, with no indifferent Kazekage waiting patiently for them to continue. Naruto decided to take charge, moving past the two Kunoichi and closer to Gaara.

"We wanna know if you know what's wrong with her. Two years ago, you found Sakura in the desert, and ever since then she's been a different person. She even stopped hitting me every time I pissed her off..."

He rambled on for a moment more before trailing off and Gaara sighed, lowering his eyes to his paperwork for a moment. He had realised Sakura was _different_ , which was no surprise, considering what had happened. But her friends were genuinely worried about her now. There had to be more going on, or at least more of the same thing. He wondered briefly if she had gotten counselling. She was a stubborn woman however, and probably thought she didn't need to.

Gaara lifted his eyes to look straight at Temari. He wasn't going to admit what happened. Naruto would skin him alive, and Ino would _kill_ him. Who knew what the Hokage would do. Kakashi Hatake was difficult to read. But as his pale eyes met Temari's, her eyes widened. She realised he _knew_. As expressionless as he was, she saw straight through _this_ façade. She had not noticed anything about it two years ago however, never putting two and two together that Gaara was responsible for the change in Sakura Haruno.

"You _know_ , don't you?" She said, unhelpfully.

Really, _why_ did she have to say this, and in front of the leaf ninja? He was in trouble now.

"Gaara?" Naruto asked, surprised. "You _know_?"

Ino clenched her fists, refraining from hitting the Kazekage. It wouldn't help Sakura if she did _that_. Gaara sighed again but didn't confirm their suspicions. Temari however, strode over to him and peered at him, both of her hands resting on his desk. She was annoyed that he had kept this from Sakura's friends.

"What is it _exactly_ that you know?"

He lowered his eyes for a moment and then stared back at her. It wasn't his place to tell them anyway, even though it _had_ been his fault. He'd decided long ago to leave it up to Sakura whether people knew or not. He kept his voice even.

"It isn't for me to say."

"But she told you," Ino said. "She didn't tell us. Why would she tell _you_? No offense, but it's not like you're her best friend or anything."

He debated how much to say. This was a difficult conversation, and not one he had wanted to be a part of. He sighed again, feeling a heavy weight in his heart. He had raped the woman in question, the Kunoichi he knew now that he was in love with. She had to hate him, right? But she hadn't shouted his crime to the rooftops nor did she accuse him before either the Suna or Konoha councils. Why?

"She didn't tell me anything," he said softly.

And it was true. They hadn't spoken a word to each other about it. She'd woken in that hospital bed, surrounded by the medics who had saved her life, and forced by Temari and Kankuro to be there once he had returned from the desert for the last time, he'd caught her eyes in his. Sakura had nodded to him, but said nothing. Perhaps she had kept silent for political reasons.

"But you know what's bothering her," Temari insisted. "I can see it in your eyes Gaara."

He nodded reluctantly.

"How can you know if she didn't actually _tell_ you?" Ino said.

"The explanation was not necessary."

Naruto grunted. "That doesn't make any sense."

"Actually, it makes perfect sense," Temari said, pulling away from the desk. "Gaara, you figured it out shortly after you found her, didn't you? You saw her in the desert and you saved her; so you saw what happened."

He didn't respond, just staring at her evenly.

' _Let them make their own assumptions,'_ he told himself, feeling the dark eyes of Shukaku peering out.

He was mildly surprised the demon didn't want to make him blurt it all out. But he supposed if he did that, Shukaku wouldn't get the chance to manipulate him into forcing himself on the pinkette again. So Gaara was struggling to keep himself out of harm's way while entertaining the idea of robbing the demon of its prize. The inner battle did not register on his face however, as his sister took a backward step away from him.

"We all know that Sakura refuses to say anything about it," she said. "And as the only other person who knows what's really bothering her, will you please confront her Gaara?"

Gaara looked between them, from Temari's concerned expression, to Naruto's resolute face and finally, Ino's hopeful features. They weren't asking him, despite Temari's use of the word "please". He had his hands full right now, what with the Ame ninja they had captured and having to oversee the interrogation that Baki had planned. Still, the three ninja standing in front of him were not going to leave him alone about this, that much was clear.

Gaara sighed and nodded his head, despite his better judgement. This was not going to be pretty.


	5. Cornered.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "28 chapters will be posted in 28 days" has been officially changed to "a chapter a day, except when I forget" lol. My brain's kind of fried right now. Anyway, enjoy. ^_^

The head doctor at the Suna Medical Core informed the Kazekage when he arrived that Sakura Haruno was expected to make a full recovery. His name was Itsumo Nashika, an old man who had retired years ago, but returned to this position when the last head medic had died, during the Akatsuki attack on Suna. Itsumo was extremely competent, despite his age, and for four years, had not given anyone a reason to doubt his ability to still do this job. But still, he was on the lookout for the perfect replacement, planning to retire, again.

' _If only our medics had even a quarter of the talent of Lady Haruno,'_ he thought absentmindedly after the Kazekage left his sight.

The medic nin, Hana Kudamono was the brightest spark to emerge from the Suna Ninja Academy for a long time, but she was still young, and her punctuality needed work, not to mention her confidence. She was sixteen now, but had yet to take the proper tests that all medical ninja would have taken at her level of advancement.

Hana chose that moment to saunter up to the head doctor, her head in the clouds again. Her hair was dark brown; she had blue eyes and looked like a younger version of Itsumo's wife, Karina. She held a chart in her hands, looking ill at ease.

"Yes Nurse Hana?"

She screwed up her nose at the reference that she'd yet to take the test to be promoted to doctor. It bugged her, but she didn't think she was ready. Most medics weren't ready to be a doctor until their mid to late twenties. Sakura Haruno was one of those few who had done it in her teens, despite her position in the well respected Team Seven that had had such a profound influence in Suna, not to mention on the Kazekage.

"Um… Did Lady Haruno's tests come back yet?"

Itsumo had forgotten for a moment that Hana was an avid fan of the Konoha medic.

"Yes, and she is resting comfortably. Is there anything else you're looking for?"

She looked ready to jump out of her skin and started fidgeting with the clipboard pressed against her chest.

"N-no, thank you doctor."

She left hurriedly, leaving Itsumo worried about whether or not she was ever going to be a doctor.

Hana handed the chart for some young Shinobi to the head nurse and made her way to Sakura Haruno's room. She wanted to share an idea she had been having lately with the pinkette. It had come to her after watching the last batch of academy graduates graduate and going over their test scores to see if any were potential medics. There was, unfortunately, _none_. She knocked on the door before slowly opening it. Sakura was sitting up in her bed, with her friend Ino Yamanaka on the chair by the bed.

"Sorry to bother you," Hana said softly and the blonde smiled at her.

"Nurse Hana, no you're not bothering anyone."

Sakura also smiled. "You're not carrying your clipboard."

Hana looked down at her uniform, where a clipboard _should_ have been. "N-no. This isn't a check up or anything. I just wanted to talk to you, if that's okay."

"Pull up a chair," Ino said, standing up and then sitting on the bed instead.

Hana nodded and took the blonde's chair. "I wanted to ask your opinion Lady Haruno about an idea I've had recently."

"Lady Haruno?" Ino raised her eyebrows cheekily. "Well well, Sakura, they _love_ you here. Maybe you should move to Suna permanently."

Sakura scowled at her, making Ino sigh deeply. It was laced with the usual scorn that told her best friend not to joke about such things. She wondered if the Kazekage had had a chance to talk to her yet. Ino frowned, but instead of commenting on this, addressed the young nurse sitting on the chair instead.

"Sakura's all ears."

Hana giggled softly. "Y-yes. I actually thought about this a few weeks ago, but I wasn't sure what to do, so I wanted your opinion. Um, I was going over the list of the academy graduates and thinking about that abandoned area. You know, those buildings that were never completed after the Akatsuki… well, anyway. I think that perhaps the area could be devoted to building a new training area to introduce medical training to academy students. If they start earlier, it could conceivably increase the number of graduating students with an affinity for healing…"

She trailed off, looking hopeful. Sakura smiled at her, impressed, while Ino grinned. The blonde broke the silence first.

"Are you sure you're a nurse? You should be a doctor by now, with that kind of intelligence."

Hana blushed, not sure what to say.

Sakura felt sorry for her. She really was very intelligent, but didn't have the confidence in herself to back up all her ideas. She needed someone to guide her, to stand behind her and _push_ her in the right direction. Sometimes it was better not to know you're being _helped_ that was most beneficial for medical ninja. Sakura supposed that went for all ninja though. She tried to look happy for her.

"Tell you what," she said. "When I finally get out of this hospital bed, I'll head over to the area and do a report. But we're signing your name on it, okay?"

She _needed_ this push. Hana nodded her head enthusiastically, grateful for the vote of confidence.

X X X

Later that day, after forcefully discharging herself and as the sun was in its initial throes of setting, Sakura did as she'd promised. She was excited actually, to be helping Hana out like this. This was the first positive feeling she'd had since returning to Suna, on the Hokage's orders. She wandered through the buildings, finding a particularly large one that looked stable enough, if the council couldn't afford to knock them down. But on closer inspection, she spotted the cracks in the foundations.

Sakura realised she had been followed, as soon as she was ready to leave the building.

Construction here had halted, due to lack of funds, and the council was still debating what to do with it. At Hana's suggestion, the pinkette was inspecting the site. It _would_ be the perfect place to train academy students interested in becoming medics. Medical ninja were severely outnumbered by fighting ninja, and took longer to train. So she saw Hana's reasoning behind getting students interested in it earlier. It could conceivably cut down that training time. A similar idea had been posed recently in Konoha, but Hana couldn't have known about this. It had been suggested about the same time that the young medic had thought about it.

Sakura's first thought when Hana had voiced it today: _'Great minds think alike.'_

Right now however, her thoughts surrounded the horrible things she intended to do to her stalker. This person wasn't very far away, but if it hadn't been for the fact that she was in an abandoned area, she might not have noticed their presence.

"Come out!" She called, her hand going to her kunai.

"You don't need that kunai, Sakura."

The pinkette cringed visibly at the sight of the Shinobi walking idly toward her. His deep mesmerising voice did however make her lower the kunai. Gaara wasn't wearing his Kazekage robes, instead he was more comfortable in the maroon pants and long, parted shirt he always wore when fighting enemies, with the light grey wrap around vest. She wondered: was he looking for a fight right now?

"What do you want?" Sakura asked, hiding her fear. This was the first time since two years ago that they had been alone together.

Gaara took in her appearance, her stance. She was ready to defend herself if he suddenly attacked her. With no-one else around, she had dropped the honorific's, and was glaring at him. If it wasn't for Temari, Naruto and Ino, he wouldn't be here at all.

"Your friends are worried about you."

She frowned at him, surprised that he would seek her out, _alone_ , just to tell her this.

"And?" She asked.

"They wanted me to confront you on this."

Sakura chuckled mirthlessly. "I don't believe you. If Ino or Naruto were worried about me, they would speak to me themselves, not go running to _you_."

He wasn't ready for the ruthlessness in her voice. Okay, he wasn't expecting a hug and a kiss and an "I forgive you Gaara, now let's go have sex in your bedroom", but _this_ was still a surprise. This angry Kunoichi in front of him was not the Sakura he knew.

' _No wonder they're worried about her.'_

"They didn't come running to me," he said, keeping his voice even. "They were worried about you, and Temari, Naruto, and Ino came to my office. They put two and two together Sakura, and figured you have been different since the attack on you in the desert. And considering I was the one who brought you back to Suna, they thought I might know what was making you this way."

She shook her head, feeling the sting in her eyes, but forcing herself not to cry. He was referring to that day so _pleasantly_ , that it was making her angry. The tears wanted to come, but she refused to let them, lifting her head slightly as though attempting to level her eyes with his.

"Which attack? The one by rogue ninja or the one by you?"

The corner of his eye twitched slightly at her reference, a dark voice at the back of his head trying to get his attention. But he would not let Shukaku take him over. She smirked at the twitch. Gaara took a deep breath to calm himself.

"The ninja of course," he said. "Temari knows I know why you're behaving this way."

"I'm behaving _what_ way?" She asked incredulously.

' _Okay,'_ he thought, _'wrong thing to say.'_

"She's my sister," he said, ignoring her outburst. "She saw right through me when they asked if I knew. They're your friends, and you're stubborn. This isn't just going to go away because you're ignoring it."

Yep, another wrong thing to say.

Sakura growled at him, shifting the kunai in her hand so that the blade was point upward.

"And what would you have me do?" She asked, ready to burst. "Do you _want_ me to go and tell them what you did?"

He didn't respond, but she assumed the answer was "no".

Sakura scoffed. "Of course not, so butt out."

She turned to leave but he couldn't just let this end this way. "Sakura _please_ let them help you."

And there it was again, that pleading tone. He had had the same tone in his voice immediately after he had violated her, so long ago. Gaara had the same desperation in his voice now, which had made her freeze in her tracks back then. But this wasn't two years ago. She wasn't weak or beaten. She wasn't easy for him to take advantage of.

And yet, Sakura stopped walking away, _again_. At the low humming of that god-worthy voice, she trembled involuntarily, not wanting to upset him or make him hate _her_. The part of her that was mesmerised by that voice made her turn around to face him once again. And the desperation in her made her step toward him. But anger built up in her as well, competing with her _desire_ to move closer to him. To touch him.

This new trembling was one of rage: two years of pent up rage for the Kazekage.

Sakura dropped her kunai. It clanged against the hard surface of the ground, the sound echoing around them. The fading light of the sun lit up Gaara's face and the pinkette clenched her fists. He backed up as she inched toward him, as though afraid of accidentally touching her. This maddened her further, and she walked faster now, forcing him up against a wall. She was breathing heavily, staring into his pale eyes as his face remained impassive. Then she made a decision.

Sakura threw a punch at the Kazekage, her chakra fist slamming into the wall behind him, but he had done nothing to avoid the blow. The wall cracked and broke, but did not shatter, as one of her punches would normally have done. He was worried about her, this outburst. She wasn't handling seeing him very well.

' _Neither am I, I supposed,'_ he thought, thinking about how Shukaku liked to torment him.

But it wasn't just going to go away with this realisation. Gaara braced himself as the pinkette panted, as though her skills were taking twice as much chakra to maintain. She pulled her arm back again, but now she aimed directly for Gaara's head. She wasn't going to miss on purpose this time! He had no right to tell her to stop, considering everything, but he also had no intention of letting her hit him either. What exactly would that prove?

So this time Gaara dodged to the side so that the punch landed on the wall again; the wall crumbled this time, bringing down a section of the building with it. It blocked any possible exit from that direction.

Gaara would not touch her or block her attacks. If he did that, how would he ever let go? The sand that normally came to defend him was unnecessary this time and he made a conscious effort to repress it. The Kazekage dodged and weaved out of Sakura's way instead of letting her hit his sand, she wondered _why_. Perhaps he was worried her chakra fist would break the sand. She kept trying to hit him; her tears rolled down her face, silent and purposeful at the same. She was venting of course, and _needed_ to hit him. She hadn't even _tried_ over the last two years to talk about what happened, and had fooled herself into believing that she didn't need to.

Sakura was at the end of her rope, not wanting to face this, but desperate to be held by him. She wanted to move on, but couldn't – not yet. She hesitated for a moment, lulling him into a false sense of security, and then got under his defences.

He couldn't avoid her this time. Gaara brushed her arm in an attempt to deflect her attack and the graze sent a tremble through his body. The sensation was warm and pleasing, but also intoxicating, almost suffocating. Before he could stop himself, his hands thrust out and grabbed Sakura roughly by her wrists, effectively putting an end to her assault.

She panted, half collapsing into him, and letting him hold her still. She didn't have the energy to fight anymore. She was still so angry, so determined to make him pay for what he had done, but the very core of her being was grateful that he had finally stopped her. As his heart hammered in his chest, Sakura lifted her face to look directly into those pale, composed eyes of his and she licked her dry lips.

"Gaara, I _hate_ you."

He nodded silently, not surprised. He knew she hated him; it was only natural. It was tearing him apart inside, to hear her voice the words however, but he kept his face impassive. What he didn't know, was _why_ she hated him. The Kazekage assumed it was from two years ago, but Sakura had long forgiven him for that, even if she hadn't actually come to terms with it. No, what made her so angry right now, so _hateful_ , was the way he was making her _feel_...

Oblivious to her true emotions, Gaara lifted her gently away from him and released his hold on her wrists. She shivered, not showing her disappointment at his release. She needed him to hold her. She _ached_ for this. She kept her eyes downcast as he stepped gingerly toward her.

"Sakura?"

He would not touch her, although Shukaku was screaming at him. The demon was trying to take control. It was dangerous, standing this close to her. But she wasn't helpless. The demon was trying to convince him she would want him all over her, that she was strong enough to push him away and he didn't need to be worried that she would be too weak to resist him, like last time. But Shukaku was only buttering him up, right? It wanted him to take her again. But no matter how much he wanted to turn around and walk away, Gaara's stronger instinct was to cradle her, to kiss her and pull her into his soul.

The tears on her face were dry now, but she felt the emotion behind them nonetheless. She looked up at him, annoyed by the serene expression on his face. The building around them was threatening to collapse in on itself now, but neither of them paid it much attention. Gaara reached out to wipe at her dry tears, and she didn't move to stop him. But before his fingers could touch her skin, he stopped. This was what Shukaku wanted!

He struggled to pull his hand back, to run away from her as her eyes widened in shock at the tormented expression now creeping over his face.

' **YOU CANNOT RESIST HER FOREVER, MY LITTLE JINCHURIKI. TAKE HER NOW, OR I'LL TEAR HER TO SHREDS INSTEAD.'**

Hana had been wrong. It wasn't through his chakra that that demon had taken him over.

"No!" Gaara screamed, pulling away from Sakura suddenly, and startling her. He had not yelled that loud since before his fight with Naruto during the botched invasion on Konoha by Orochimaru.

"Get away from me!" He screamed at her, louder this time.

Sakura didn't hesitate, realising what he was stopping himself from doing. She turned around and made to leave, but before she could move out of his line of sight, she heard him growl. That was Shukaku, she had heard the bijuu before. The pinkette stopped, then immediately regretted her hesitation.

Gaara pounced, his grip as abrasive as his sand as he shoved her against the wall. Masonry only four feet away from them collapsed, blocking the only exit. In the near darkness now enveloping the collapsing building, Sakura cried out as Gaara kissed her, biting her lip hard enough to draw blood. His eyes were the diamond shaped pale yellow and black of Shukaku's now. He held her tightly, with the strength of the demon within and she flashed back to two years ago, to the Wind Shrine, and to the last time she had felt this helpless. She struggled and pushed at him, angering the passion that had possessed him, knowing it was futile.

Sakura cried as his hand grabbed her top to lift it above her head, unable to stop him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	6. Traitorous.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jidō – it literally means "child" or "juvenile"

– **Flashback –**

" _Sakura, please forgive me."_

_Gaara was breathing heavily and panting as he stared at the pinkette. She stopped at the sound of his voice, trembling slightly. He wanted Sakura to forgive him, and he wanted her to tell him she didn't blame him. But he knew it would be a lie either way. He had just raped her, taking advantage of her weakened state._

' _What had happened to her to leave her this way?' He wondered silently._

_She stood at the entrance to the Wind Shrine, clearly trying to decide what to do. He was aware of what he had just done to her, but felt apart from his actions. He knew it was his fault, but could not bring himself to say sorry. It had to be the influence of Shukaku making him feel this way. That_ _ thing _ _would never admit that it had been wrong._

_Still, there was the lingering question in his head, on_ _ how _ _she had become so vulnerable._

_He didn't have an answer. But thinking this, he felt the guilt of his actions begin to pull on him. His meditative state had been interrupted and he felt his self-control ripped away from him at Sakura's arrival to this temple. She hadn't known he was here, she hadn't known what this place was for, and he'd violated an important ally without a single ounce of restraint or concern for her well-being. Gaara felt like at any moment, the Konoha Anbu black ops was going to come charging in here and kill him on sight._

_Sakura Haruno had been raped by the Kazekage. Just the reminder of his actions made him tremble in horror at what he had done. He hadn't been in his right mind, the very essence of Shukaku coursing through his body at the time, but somehow he doubted this made any difference to Sakura. He had an idea what it was like to feel truly helpless, and at the mercy of another, but not in this way. He realised that no words would make this okay for the beautiful pinkette and resolved to maintaining this stillness, to let her break this awkward silence as he waited for her to respond. Still, he was surprised that his voice had made her stop._

_She trembled again, not looking at him and in the blink of an eye, he was standing behind her, holding her. Sakura couldn't have pushed him away anyway. No matter what had just happened, or how guilty he felt, he was not prepared to let her hurt herself. She had just fainted from the pain, blood loss, and exhaustion of her ordeal and Gaara lifted her up to stop her from hitting the floor. Her body was too weak to sustain any more damage._

_There was a side room adjoining this main room where Gaara took the time to rest while he was here and he carried Sakura Haruno into the room and placed her gently on the single bed. There were no medical supplies here, as this temple, where Shukaku had originally been sealed was long abandoned. So Gaara fetched some water and clean rags to clean the wounds so they wouldn't get infected. Once she regained consciousness, she would be needing water to drink and food._

_The Kazekage left the small side room and entered the other adjoining room which was supplied with staple food normally prepared for Shinobi on long missions. He left it here for when he came here to meditate. It had become a pilgrimage, as this was the fourth time he'd come here. Gaara gathered the food Sakura might need and filled a gourd with water from the water pump outside the building. It was antiquated, but never broke down. There was always water, even in the desert. There was also an oasis nearby as well, but the Wind Shrine stood out more prominently to passersby, which was probably how the pinkette had missed it._

_Gaara left the items he'd collected for Sakura on a low table next to the bed the Kunoichi was sleeping on and left the room again, leaving the door open a crack so that only a small ray of light was visible inside. She needed to rest, but when she awoke, she would also need to see right in front of her. This place was not easy to illuminate, due to the lack of appropriate ventilation (for example, there were very few windows)._

_Guilt weighing heavily on his heart, Gaara left the shrine. He sat on the stone flooring surrounding the small building, like a sentinel, guarding his princess._

– **End Flashback –**

Sakura cried as Gaara's hand grabbed her top to lift it above her head, unable to stop him.

She pushed her arms down in an effort to impede his move to undress her and groaned as he bit her lip and shoved her against the splintered masonry wall behind her in punishment. He broke the kiss when he did this, so she cried out, rolling her head to the side. The sound that came out of her was strangled and half-hearted anyway. She was not unfamiliar with this treatment after all.

He ignored her struggling and sounds of protest, his left hand moving up and under her top, to the bandage wrapping that bound her breasts. She had not been wearing the material two years ago, having pulled it off after her fight with the rogue ninjas in the desert. It had felt like she was being suffocated. She had no idea why.

Sakura groaned, frustrated. She turned her head back to face Gaara as he ran his hand over her mounds, the lustful look in those diamond shaped eyes of his making her shudder. On some deep, twisted level, she wanted this, her grip on his arms defiant but weak. She licked her lips and attempted to push him away again. She could only summon a small amount of chakra, having wasted so much trying to hit him before, missing him every time and tiring herself out quicker than normal. Subconsciously, she probably did it on purpose, not _really_ wanting to hurt him.

' _And look at me now.'_

The chakra made him pause for a moment, like he had just been slapped, and she hoped, by the confused look on his face, it meant that he was coming to his senses. She begged to Kami silently.

This chakra was familiar to him, he could feel it; even with Shukaku screaming in his head, telling him to fuck her or watch her die, he realised the difference between this Sakura and the one in his dreams. This chakra was weaker, that was it. She had done something to use it up and he was taking advantage of her… again.

Gaara closed his eyes tightly, trying to make himself let her go. He wanted this of course, in some twisted way, but this was not the way to get back in her good graces. His grip tightened at this thought and he felt her hot breath on his face as he touched their foreheads together. It was so intoxicating; no, _she_ was so intoxicating. He could feel her close to him now, his hand moving without his permission to her left breast and squeezing the clothed mound so hard that she gasped.

He wanted to feel the flesh, caress the skin, and have her moan in his mouth. Shukaku was angry now.

' **STOP DELAYING ME, JIDŌ. DO IT NOW, OR WATCH AND** **FEEL** **WHAT IT'S LIKE FOR HER TO DIE!'**

Gaara's eyes snapped open. Like a man possessed, he shifted her against the crumbling wall, ignoring the fall of yet more masonry and moved between her legs. He parted her knees with his and she leant her head against the wall, trying to brace herself. She hadn't uttered a word so far, believing this to be futile, but suddenly, as her legs were lifted unceremoniously off of the ground and she was forced to wrap them around his waist to support herself, she wanted him to hear her voice.

"Gaara…"

The word got away from her, but it was enough. He froze again, as though he had never heard the like from her before. She lowered her head to look into his eyes, and was surprised by what she saw. His left eye lightened slightly, and for a moment, it looked like his normal iris. That meant that Gaara was fighting his demon, right? She tried to speak to him again as his lips returned to her mouth. He pushed against her, still fully dressed and she felt him swollen against her clothed entrance.

' _Kami, do I do that to him?'_

Under her usual, parted pink skirt, she wore short, skin tight black shorts. Her clothes had been made from material used in creating ninja wear, so it was durable, but it was also a very _light_ fabric, which was why she had chosen it. Gaara was gripping both of her wrists tightly now, his partial erection so very obvious to her. It was making her tremble, her body giving in even though her mind knew better. He moved her arms up, over her head and held them together, his now free hand trailing down to her breasts and…

She cut off his movement by biting his lip, _hard_. Although he seemed to enjoy it, it took him by surprise as well. The Kazekage pulled his lips away from hers, blinking heavily. With him in shock, she managed to wrangle one of her hands free. He didn't try to stop her.

"Gaara," she said softly. "You can stop yourself. You don't want to do this."

Sakura cupped his face with her free hand, watching the struggle on his face. She tried to ignore his hand, which had resumed its journey, even as he stared into her eyes. He had lifted her skirt and was tracing his hand along her shape. She tried to ignore the way this was making her feel as she stared back at him. She was moist already, swallowing heavily at this realisation. Her emerald orbs pleaded with the Kazekage silently as she spoke again.

"Gaara, you're better than this. You know you are. Please, just stop yourself."

His hand stopped and she watched his left eye returned completely to its normal colour and contour. He started breathing heavily and she smiled slightly. She lifted a finger to touch the kanji on his forehead, her eyes never leaving his. It was working.

"Listen to me Gaara," she said soothingly. "You value love. You want someone to love you like you love them. _This_ is not love, Gaara."

He blinked heavily, staring straight into her eyes. She could still feel his hand on her entrance, as he had literally frozen in place. The tormented look on his face both disturbed her and pulled on her heart strings. Was Shukaku whispering in his ear? Was it in control? Whatever was going on in his head, he was trying to pull away, she could see this now. She wanted to push at him again, to test if he would let her pull away, but there was still a glint in his eyes that scared her. If she pushed him now, it could undo what she had just done, and she didn't have the strength to get away if his grip on her got any tighter.

So Sakura decided to wait this out. It had the best chance of succeeding.

She considered speaking again, and thinking about the best thing that would make him let her go, she was prevented from having to form the words as Gaara lowered his head, shaking it slowly. When he lifted his eyes to look back at her, she was pleasantly surprised by the change in the colour. He managed to push her away, not gently, but not so harshly to add to her pain. He really was remarkable, she thought. To be able to force Shukaku out of his mind like that. She only wished he'd done the same thing two years ago.

Sakura trembled.

' _Oh, thank Kami,'_ she thought, sliding down the wall to fall to her knees.

She had _talked_ him out of raping her. She felt proud of herself as she looked up at him. He was like a frightened animal to her eyes now, terrified of himself. But unlike the last time he had had her in such a compromising position, he didn't beg her for forgiveness. He didn't even apologise. She felt angry at this, but before she could even think to berate him for it, he left the building, seemingly turning into sand as he disappeared.

As Gaara left her behind, Sakura winced, putting her anger aside for now, and her hand travelled down to her inner thigh. She was still moist from the contact. It scared her beyond belief. One moment she was fighting him and angry, the next he was on her, pushing his body up against hers, and making her tremble. Her traitorous body was still aroused.

X X X

Gaara ran from the abandoned buildings, not knowing yet where he was headed, except _away_ from Sakura.

He considered heading home, to bed, but could not risk falling asleep right now. Shukaku was angry at having been robbed of its prize. Finally, the jinchuriki had gained some measure of control. He was his own person after all. His thoughts were his own, his body and his soul. He had complete control, dammit!

But having Sakura Haruno pressed against him again was so intoxicating, he couldn't deny this. She was so sensual, smelt like strawberries, and _tasted_ so sweet. He couldn't get this out of his head. Her physical attributes were overwhelming, from those curves, to that perfect waist and those shapely thighs. Not to mention her flawless skin, gorgeous emerald eyes, and the way she trembled when he touched her. His _need_ for her was stronger every time he saw her. It was getting out of control.

So that was where his control ended it seemed. Shukaku's voice in his head could only excuse so much.

Gaara had feelings for the pinkette, he believed he was in love with her, but what had just _almost_ happened was different; it wasn't just him, it _had_ to be the demon as well. But if Gaara hadn't had any feelings for Sakura, it wouldn't have done this. So he did blame himself. She had suffered because of him, and now… He did not want to dwell on what had just happened. The mere memory of what Sakura tasted and felt like was enough to make him hard.

Gaara stopped suddenly, landing lithely on the top of the closest building to the Kazekage mansion. He closed his eyes, trying to dispel the warm feeling that was knotting up his stomach. It was proving difficult. Not only did images of Sakura come to him when he closed his eyes, but also Shukaku's torment. It reminded him what she looked like naked, made him recall what it had been like two years ago, to feel himself slide into her. The scream that had erupted from her; it was a sound so unlike anything he had ever heard any woman make.

Yeah, it had been his first time, and he was embarrassed by this. It was even more fuel for Shukaku. He had been waiting for the right girl, having had feelings for Sakura Haruno already, but no hope that _she_ would miraculously develop any for him. She dated Naruto for a while, and some point after _that_ had ended, the blonde Shinobi had courted the Hyuuga heir. Gaara had no idea if he had been Sakura's first, but hoped not. The possibility that he had _stolen_ her innocence was too much to bear. But when he thought back, she had not bled or anything. Did this mean that she had slept with Naruto?

He struggled against the jealous feelings. He had no right to feel this way. His body trembled and the insane idea of running back to her right now flitted about in his mind. But Gaara would not give in to this, after coming so far. He was proud of himself for pulling away from Sakura, despite his desire, and regardless of Shukaku. But the fact that he had almost taken advantage of her again had him terrified of himself as well. He needed to talk to Temari and tell her that nothing he ever said or did would change anything. Hopefully, she would leave him alone about speaking to Sakura.

Gaara's eyes snapped open and he continued onto the Kazekage building. But once in his office, he could not concentrate on paperwork, let alone anything but Sakura. So he decided to meditate again. The demon was silent since his realisation about Sakura and Naruto, as though now infuriated at the blonde instead. This made it easier for Gaara to lull himself into a comfortable groove, his mind settled. His body however, had yet to catch up to the sudden calm enveloping him. He was still aroused, though it _had_ lessened.

But as Gaara felt himself drift off unintentionally, one thought, one _truth_ was very apparent to him. Be it tomorrow, or the next day, Shukaku was going to punish him, very soon.


	7. Torment.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Namenai: Kurenai's baby. (Probably not canon.)

Shikamaru Nara was not one to pass up the opportunity to get in more sleep. It was his favourite past time after cloud watching, really, even if it _did_ take up more time. But he didn't feel tired enough to doze off as he headed back toward the room he shared with Naruto Uzumaki. Spending time in Suna, as Sakura recovered from the fight with the Amegakure rogue ninjas and the "powers that be" decided what they were supposed to do next (not to mention observe the interrogation Baki had been administering to their Ame captive) had been so _troublesome_ for the lazy cloud watcher. He just wanted to get this mission over with and head back home.

Naruto bounced along beside him as they walked, the blonde knucklehead carrying on about the last time he took Hinata out on a date. They were married, so Shikamaru didn't see the point in them _dating_ at all. He wasn't one to claim to be able to decipher the female mind anyway. His own love life was always ending with the woman in question either threatening bodily harm for him not understanding her, or refusing to have a relationship with him based on his own personality traits; as if that was more troublesome than their respective tempers or any strange desires to always _do_ something with him. Who would've known women _wanted_ to hear about his day, or know what he was thinking?

He glanced at Naruto. The Hyuuga clan had been very strict with him marrying their heir. Naruto kept his own last name, as did Hinata, but their children would get the name that suited them better. For example, if their first child did not have the Byakugan kekkei genkai, then he or she would be an Uzumaki, and of course, the _next_ Hyuuga heir after Hinata would be the first one born with the Byakugan. It was such a bother. Shikamaru didn't know how Naruto managed the pressure.

But the blonde was excited at the prospect of being a father and was currently talking adamantly about how he and Hinata had been trying so _much_ since they got married. It had been less than a year, but in typical Naruto fashion, he expected it to happen right away.

"Stop right there," Shikamaru said sternly, and they actually stopped walking, just short of the apartment building where V.I.P visitors were always housed.

"W-what?"

Shikamaru shook his head. "Are you sure you want to be in such a hurry to be a father Naruto? It's a lot of work, you have no idea. Try babysitting some time. Then you'll get an idea, and that is only the beginning of the problems. Talk to another parent before you rush into this. Babies can be very troublesome."

Naruto frowned at him. "If I didn't know better, I'd think you were a father already, Shikamaru."

The cloud watcher sighed. "I helped Kurenai look after Namenai, remember? I still am, even now, technically."

"Yeah, I guess so," Naruto said, chuckling and rubbing the back of his head.

Shikamaru did indeed feel like he had been a father to Namenai, considering her own father had been killed by the Akatsuki, Hidan. But he supposed, telling Naruto not to rush was doomed from the moment the first word left his mouth. He decided not to say anything more. Thankfully, the knucklehead didn't talk about his attempts to "make babies" anymore, which made it easier for Shikamaru to keep out of it.

"Come on, let's go up, and see if the girls are back," Naruto said, instead of continuing the conversation.

' _Che, troublesome,'_ Shikamaru thought.

Ino Yamanaka greeted them at the door to their room. "Have you seen Sakura?"

The boys shook their heads and she groaned. "I don't think the Kazekage has spoken to her yet."

Naruto unlocked the door to the room he shared with Shikamaru and Ino followed them in, much to their dismay.

"I'm really worried about her," she said.

"Me too," Naruto piped up.

"Maybe you shouldn't have left it all up to Gaara," Shikamaru said, moving to lean against the window.

The girls had a terrace, while he and Naruto merely had a window, though it did offer them a nice view of the village. He ignored the blonde Kunoichi as she shot daggers at him. He wanted nothing more than to just go back to Konoha. What were they still doing in Suna anyway?

Ino glared at him. "Well then smarty pants, why don't _you_ go speak to Sakura? I'm sure that with your intellect and reasoning, you'd find out what was bothering her in no time."

Shikamaru glanced at her. "If her best friend can't do it, what makes you think I can? We should just wait until we get back to Konoha and ask the Hokage to order her to tell you guys."

He was bordering on not caring anymore, not that he would admit that out loud. There was always something going on with these girls, but still, it was so very weird for Sakura. She hadn't come back to the apartment building and he couldn't sense her chakra in the immediate area of the building. Maybe she went over to the hospital?

"I'll head over to the hospital and look for her," Naruto said, as if reading his mind. "She's probably just looking in on the place. She does that every time she comes here."

"You're right Naruto, for once," Ino winked at him and he grinned.

She didn't have the heart to tell him it wasn't exactly a compliment.

Shikamaru ignored them again, staring out the window. The sun had set and Sakura was not back yet. He sighed. Why did women have to be so troublesome? It made him worry about her even more.

X X X

– **Flashback –**

_The hospital was overrun, but Sakura Haruno was faring well, having had to take charge of a lot of the patients. There were a number of people coming in wounded, civilian and ninja alike. The last three days had been_ _ hell _ _. But now the leaf help was here, and Gaara was grateful that Konoha had responded so quickly after Takamaru, the fastest carrier bird in Suna, had delivered their message. Hundreds were dead, more critically wounded; the medical core cut down to less than three quarters of their original staff and people in a panic. If it hadn't been for Lady Tsunade's quick response, the failed attack by the Akatsuki could've brought Suna to its ruin._

_It had certainly done a good job of bringing them to their knees. The council was dead, every one of them being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Talk about coincidence…_

_And many leaf ninja, medical or not, had come. There were two dozen of their best, from Sakura Haruno, to her best friend Ino Yamanaka, to nurses and medical ninja, and ninja helping out with the necessities around the village. Gaara had actually let his face_ _ show _ _how he was feeling when he realised how much their allies had put into this mission. It was a wonderful feeling, knowing their alliance was so strong that the Hokage would even send her star student._

_Gaara refused to leave the hospital when Temari came to get him. There was so much going on right now. There were still crumbling buildings out there and people were still being dug out of rubble; the lost, homeless, and orphaned and near death that had not fit into the hospital infirmary. There were temporary infirmaries set up and the Kazekage had been out there all day, now wanting to see that the patients were being taken care of. But his sister had other ideas._

" _I'll drag you out of here if I had to," she said, her hand on her iron fan to emphasize how strongly she felt about this. "They don't need you here, and you haven't slept. No-one's going to think any less of you if you rest for a while."_

_He eyed off her fan. "How can I when no-one else is taking a break? I need to do something to help, even if it's just standing in the room and signing papers."_

_Temari stared down at him. He was sitting on a waiting bench, leaning backwards gracefully, but she could see he was exhausted. He'd been using his sand all day to help clear rubble and cover victims from debris. He did not intend to go home to rest up. And she also saw through his bravado. Gaara blamed himself for everything that had happened. It was obvious he thought this way because the Akatsuki were after him, not Suna. She loved her brother, but he was being too hard on himself. If anyone was to blame, it was the ones who had put Shukaku in him in the first place, and the fourth Kazekage, for ordering Chiyo to do it._

_She sighed and sat down next to him._

" _No-one's blaming you Gaara. You've done such an amazing job as Kazekage, and these last few days, you've saved more lives than I have in a year. Just because some stupid organisation decided to target you doesn't make this all your fault."_

_He stared back at her, expressionless. He blamed himself, yes, but he was also incredibly angry. It wasn't just about him. People had died, and their killer had had no remorse for his actions. He wanted to do something about that, but the state Suna was in now required his complete attention. The sooner they got on their feet, the sooner he could talk to the other Kages about taking out that organisation once and for all._

_Gaara was surprised by the level of anger in himself, and wondered if this was Shukaku's influence. He hadn't been having any troubles as of late, with the demon, until that blonde Akatsuki had destroyed most of his village. Whenever Gaara closed his eyes, even for a moment, he could feel the bloodlust building up. A sealing jutsu developed by Suna tacticians had given him a measure of peace every once in awhile, but he needed something stronger. And so Gaara had reverted to the days in which he wouldn't sleep or rest at all, not wanting Shukaku to take him over._

_The last few days, he would occasionally doze, dark images coming to him to tempt him to relapse to the twisted killer he had once been._

" _Kazekage-sama, what are you doing here?"_

_The sound of the soft, feminine voice broke Gaara out of his musings. It was Sakura Haruno. She was in her scrubs and bloodied from her time in the operating room. She looked down at him questioningly, those beautiful emerald orbs hypnotising him. He mentally slapped himself. Sakura was a leaf ninja, not sand. He had started to feel weird around her, but decided to ignore these feelings. Having her stare at him like that wasn't helping. He wasn't even turned off by the state of her clothes._

" _He's being stubborn," Temari said. "Can you send a nurse over here to check up on him, and give him a reason to go home to rest?"_

_Sakura smiled. "All the nurses are busy. But I'll check you out Kazekage-sama, if you don't mind that is."_

_He gave her a nonchalant expression, which Temari translated for him._

" _He does mind Sakura, but don't take it personally. Change your scrubs and I'll make him stay still for you."_

_Sakura chuckled. "Okay, I'll be right back."_

_Gaara glared at his sister. "I don't need to be babied."_

" _Of course you do."_

_Gaara growled audibly, the sound startling his sister. He kept this up, pushing Sakura out of his mind and instead dwelling on the destruction of his village as the pinkette returned a few minutes later to give him a once over. He hadn't wanted any of this when he became Kazekage. He just wanted to protect his people, and look what was happening! It angered him beyond words. This was all his father's fault. And Shukaku's._

– **End Flashback –**

Gaara woke up shortly after midnight, not as well rested as he'd hoped. Shukaku had left him alone, this was true, but he had been haunted by that memory of four years ago. Suna had been demolished, for a lack of a better word, and needed to be rebuilt, for the most part. He'd felt so helpless, so powerless, even as the Kazekage, as he watched men, women and children die for him. Shukaku rested inside him, and the Akatsuki had wanted it. So when that man, later revealed to have been called Deidara, had come for him, all of Suna had witnessed Gaara's triumphant battle. And then the unthinkable had happened. The Akatsuki member had _blown himself up_! What kind of _idiot_ would do _that_?

The fallout had killed the council, so the only authority that remained above the Intelligence Core was Gaara, the Kazekage, the person who was the entire reason for the attack. Baki had taken over the Intelligence Core after that and a carrier bird had been sent to the leaf. Their allies never once blamed Gaara, no-one in the sand ever did. The feudal lord was a little abrupt with him, but he didn't outwardly condemn him. So Gaara's guilt had no ammo and eventually faded completely. It was replaced by anger and a desire to strike back. These feelings had been a part of him back when he was calling Shukaku "mother". And it was Naruto again who had helped him to heal.

The blonde was amongst those who had come to help with the rescue of survivors and his determination to help instead of get a decent amount of rest had only been matched by Gaara's… and Sakura Haruno. She was so stubborn, so _resilient_ , that Gaara never once told her to rest. Her best friend Ino had badgered her until she took the time to take care of herself; Temari had joined in once the leaf Kunoichi had gotten out of control. It became quickly obvious to the Kazekage after that that she was not used to losing patients, let alone so many. He loved her from that moment on.

He sighed, standing up (he had been sitting on the floor again, resting his back against the bed) and stretched. He was not blasé about why he had needed to meditate in the first place, noticing for the first time that the sun had long since set. Gaara wondered where Sakura was now, and if she was planning on telling everyone what he had tried to do. He supposed it was inevitable. How could they keep this quiet for long? That abandoned building had probably collapsed entirely by now. He wished Temari hadn't pressured him into speaking with Sakura. He should've just told her to ask the pinkette herself, but his sister was _scary_.

Gaara pushed this out of his head, and moved to the window, staring out over Suna, into the distance, and remembering his dream… no, his _memory_.

Even now, there were buildings that were barely standing. And just thinking this made him remember _again_ , what he had done only hours earlier. Not long before the sun had set, he had tried to rape Sakura Haruno… _again_! He hated himself for this, even though it _had_ been Shukaku's influence. But it was his desire to be near Sakura, to hold her and love her that had driven him to grab her the way he did. Shukaku took control of him at some point, but that hold wasn't as strong as last time, hence the fact that Gaara had managed to stop himself before he'd gone too far.

And Sakura's voice had helped. He closed his eyes. That voice was so soft, yet so domineering. She was an angel to him. Just thinking about her made him happy.

' **YOU DON'T DESERVE TO BE HAPPY!'**

Shukaku screamed inside his head and Gaara stumbled backward onto his bed, trying to shut the voice out of his head. It wasn't just a scream, but a pounding that was making his body tremble violently. He whimpered, throwing his arms over his head in a desperate attempt to shut the memories out of his head.

The way Sakura made him feel, the way her eyes made him want to smile and tell her how beautiful she was; it changed into an image of the pinkette from two years ago, helpless under him, bleeding and naked as he pounded her mercilessly. Her screaming, the tears; they were an echo of how his victims had screamed when he crushed them in his Sand Coffin. He could _feel_ their helplessness as if Shukaku had read their minds in the moments before their deaths.

There was nothing more for the demon now. Gaara wouldn't take her against her will anymore. The demon wanted her dead. He stood up, the screaming of Shukaku still ringing in his ears, but more of a dull clanging. There was only one thing left to do now.

With that thought, Gaara threw on his travelling cloak, not bothering to pack any essentials and used Shunshin to get out of the building without being seen. The sentinels keeping an eye on the circumference that made up the walls protecting Suna didn't see him leave the village.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	8. Oasis In The Sand.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> GaaSaku. Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

"The Kazekage is missing."

"Was he kidnapped?"

"Don't know. There's no trace of him."

"He wouldn't abandon the village, he _must_ have been kidnapped."

"Who could kidnap Lord Gaara? The Akatsuki couldn't even do that."

"But he really is gone."

The voices coming from inside the closed room only several feet away were faint to Sakura Haruno. But their meaning was clear. Shortly after attempting to rape her _again_ , Gaara Sabaku had literally vanished into thin air. The sentinels around the village reported no movement and there was no indication as to who or what might have been responsible. This had people in a panic and everyone fearful of what had happened to their Kazekage.

Naruto Uzumaki paced angrily in front of Sakura as she mused on this, her thoughts a million miles away from her surroundings. Why now? She knew he would not abandon Suna, and there were no signs of struggle anywhere. So did it have something to do with her? She felt a slight twinge of guilt at this, but pushed it away. If indeed that "almost rape" was what set him off, then so what? A tracking team was bound to find Gaara sooner or later and bring him back anyway.

Sakura shifted in her chair. What worried her was the kind of questions that would be asked once he came back. Why would their beloved Kazekage just suddenly rush off like that? While the chances of any of them suddenly realising that it was because of her was slim to none, she couldn't help but fear their reactions if they found out. Konoha would be angry at Gaara, Suna would be outraged at Sakura, and the alliance between their villages would crumble.

' _Maybe I'm overreacting,'_ she thought.

"Fucking _hell_ ," Naruto muttered, startling Sakura.

It was only nine in the morning, but already everyone was on edge. Gaara had been missing since last night, Kankuro having raised the alarm after heading to the Kazekage's room to collect him for an important meeting at the crack of dawn.

"Calm down," Sakura said and Naruto stopped pacing.

"How can you be so calm?" He asked her, glancing at the door to the council chambers.

"Easy, I'm not _you_ ," she snapped and he frowned at her.

How could he possibly know she was terrified _and_ worried on the inside when all she was doing was ignoring his concern and snapping at him? Sakura had a bad feeling that Naruto was about to snap back but was spared his annoyance when Kankuro exited the council chambers, alone. He looked worse for wear.

"What's going on?" Naruto asked, his voice coming out slightly shrill.

Sakura remained seated, staring at the two men in front of her.

"The council is bolstering Suna's defences and _we_ are to put together four squads including two tracking nins and two normal ninjas on each one to spread out from the sand and look for traces of the Kazekage. They have asked that you guys come with us."

"Really?"

Sakura was surprised they were responding this quickly. Under the circumstances, where absolutely _no_ traces existed, the standard procedure in Konoha was to send out spies, which was typically a solo mission. Kankuro nodded, unfazed by her surprise, but Naruto glanced at her, his eyes narrowed in his trademark death stare.

Sakura sighed and stood, feeling as lazy and _troubled_ as Shikamaru now. "Then let's get going."

Startled out of his glare, Naruto nodded to her and followed behind her as Kankuro led the way out of the Kazekage mansion. He didn't understand her. One moment she didn't seem to care that Gaara was missing, the next she was instigating their leave to go find him. The blonde kept his suspicious eye on his best friend as they approached the apartment where they had been put up for their stay in Suna.

"Meet me at the exit in fifteen minutes," Kankuro said to them. "I'll get the others ready."

Sakura nodded and Naruto mimicked her solemnly. He followed her up to their rooms to find Shikamaru and Ino waiting outside the doors, already ready. Seemingly, word had gotten around and they were eager to help out.

"What's the deal?" Ino asked.

"We're heading out with sand ninja to find the Kazekage," Sakura said evenly.

"We'll bring Gaara back," Naruto said, thumping his chest.

Shikamaru rolled his eyes at him. "Just get your gear ready."

As Naruto started bickering with the lazy Jounin, Sakura entered the room she was sharing with Ino and collected everything she might need. She had brought a cloak on her mission to Suna this time, unlike two years ago, that would protect her in case of sandstorms, and wondered for a moment how many provisions they would need. Temari had told her once that even sand ninja didn't spend extended amounts of time in the desert if they could help it. This mission struck Sakura as one they needn't head to any of the normal villages or towns to rest up. It stood to reason that the council would want the Kazekage's disappearance not to get around. It was just a precaution anyway.

So Sakura threw her travelling cloak on and brought her normal supplies and ninja tools, not anticipating spending days in the desert. The four leaf ninja made their way silently to the exit to find that Kankuro wasn't coming with them. Temari joined Ino, while Shikamaru went with a Jounin Sakura didn't know by name, Naruto was stuck with Rokka Namura and Sakura was with Matsuri Hamanaku; all four teams also consisted of two, masked tracking ninja.

"Be careful out there," Kankuro said unnecessarily.

"Don't worry," Naruto said, "we'll find Gaara."

The puppet master nodded his head mutely, grateful to the blonde knucklehead. He locked eyes with his sister and she nodded to him. He wished he could go with them, she knew, but one of the "sand siblings" had to stay behind, according to the council, and Kankuro was the one they normally referred to. And as much as he hated to admit it, Kankuro knew that Temari was better than him at not getting lost in the sands.

He smiled slightly at that, and then glanced at the leaf ninja in turn. Only Sakura didn't look back at him with determination. He dismissed the weird feeling this gave him.

Sakura was too busy worrying about trekking through the desert, and as Kankuro gave them some last minute orders from the council, she couldn't get Gaara out of her head. She _felt_ like he was watching her, and avoiding her at the same time. His presence in her mind was _very_ strong.

' _Sakura…'_

She closed her eyes tightly. There it was again; the charismatic voice of the Kazekage. She had an inner voice sure, but _this_ was bordering on insane.

X X X

They left Suna in their teams of four and again, Sakura was thankful to be travelling with Matsuri, not wanting another death glare from Naruto. He wasn't happy that she was less than enthusiastic about this. It wasn't like she was glad that Gaara had disappeared, she _did_ hope he was okay, but she just wasn't getting all worked up like the knucklehead was. And he did it so _magnificently_. Matsuri on the other hand, was less distraught and more focused, not that Naruto wasn't determined, but he was an emotional idiot that acted before thinking.

They travelled for the majority of the day, following a search pattern as instructed by the two tracking ninja and neither Sakura nor Matsuri complained, both impressed by the means tracking nin used to seek out chakra signatures. As the afternoon wore on, the former student of the Kazekage glanced at Sakura, noting that the renowned medic had been silent for a long time.

"Are you okay Lady Haruno?"

"I'm fine Matsuri."

They were the group heading north of Suna, and Sakura was _painfully_ aware that the Wind Shrine was also in this direction, just a little more north west of where they were right now. She was certain the two trackers – simply referred to as Kochi and Sendai – would want to check it out. They indicated toward it half an hour later, and she was proven correct.

Sendai seemed to be the senior of the sand nin, so he took the lead, and Sakura absentmindedly took note of the fact that his mask reminded her of the one worn by that young boy, Haku, all those years ago. He had a similar demeanour as well – intelligent, in control and level headed. She glanced at Kochi. _He_ was rigid and silent, but when they had first joined together as a squad, a slight shift in his body language showed her that he was naturally restless.

Sakura mused on herself for a moment. As a ninja, she took great care in noting the attributes of others. Matsuri's infatuation for Gaara for example, was _very_ obvious. The pinkette wondered if sand ninja ever fooled _anyone_ or if she was just being over observant.

Sendai and Kochi circled the Wind Shrine, observing the structure with their eyes and several high levelled seeking jutsus, as Sakura stayed with Matsuri, ten feet away from the entrance. The Chunin seemed annoyed that the boys were doing all the work here, but Sakura didn't mind. She had no desire to take part unless absolutely necessary.

As the tracker ninjas continued their external assessment of the shrine, Sakura made her own, her eyes raking over the small building. She hadn't been here since that day and had no intention of going inside of it ever again, but something was nagging at her. The boys were examining this from the outside, but if Gaara was in there, he could easily throw them off. They would have to actually go inside to do this thoroughly.

Sakura was torn. She wanted to find Gaara, but then again she didn't. She didn't hate him, she held no grudge, and her _physical_ reaction to him the last time she'd seen him kept cropping up in her mind. She just wondered if those weird feelings he'd invoked in her was just a result of their proximity, or something deeper. If she had feelings for him that had nothing to do with her attraction, the only way she was going to figure it out was if she found him.

Sakura sighed deeply, and Matsuri glanced at her questioningly.

"No-one's here," Kochi said, as the tracker ninjas moved toward the girls. "There are no chakra signatures."

"We can't know that someone might not be in there, hiding their chakra," Sakura said, despite herself.

"Lady Haruno," he said impatiently. "Are you suggesting the Kazekage would hide from us?"

She mentally slapped herself for her carelessness, but managed to keep them from realising this.

"I'm merely suggesting that if he was kidnapped and for some reason his kidnappers stopped here to rest, again for whatever reason, then they might not be so inclined as to broadcast their position."

He nodded. "You're right. But it's forbidden to enter here without the Kazekage's permission."

Sakura could feel the annoyance she was feeling bubbling and churning, quickly starting to anger. But Matsuri was the one who answered him.

"So we do nothing? If he's in there, isn't that reason enough to go in"?"

"And if he's not?"

The former student of the Kazekage fumed. "Lord Gaara would not mind if it was in his best interest."

"I apologise for idiot here," Sendai said quickly, to dispel the argument. "He seems to have forgotten that out of us all, you know the Kazekage the most. Besides, this _is_ an emergency."

Matsuri nodded, calm again. "Lady Haruno?"

"Matsuri?"

"Do you agree?"

Sakura nodded. "Let's go in. Kochi first."

Matsuri chuckled and nudged the tracker nin. "In you go."

The place was as dark as Sakura remembered. She brought up the rear of the single line they filed into the shrine in and looked around, leaving the door wide open. It was the only source of light right now. The circular room that greeted them was identical to the room she remembered, with adjoining doors, a central dais with a stone pedestal in the middle of it, the walls lined with circular platforms that held all kinds of items, from unlit candles to floral arrangements and silver plates with decorative insignias.

The murals on the wall were the same, as though no-one ever came here and changed them; the paintings that depicted the ancient order that once thrived in this area. But it was also just as well kept, like there really was a curator who only seemed to be home when they didn't have visitors – a shy curator perhaps, who disliked _people_.

Sakura hesitated at the central dais, an image in her mind of being pinned against it flashing before her eyes. She glanced at the circular wall around her, remembering being forced up against one of the platforms. She swallowed heavily, staring at the spot where Gaara had torn her clothes from her body and shivered involuntarily.

"Lady Haruno?" Matsuri touched her shoulder. "Are you –"

"Fine, I'm fine." Sakura mentally shook herself. "Isn't there supposed to be an underground area in here? Kankuro told me all about this place," she lied, when they all turned to look at her.

Sendai nodded. "But it was sealed years ago, when the fourth Kazekage was here last. The seals are still in place."

Sakura nodded and they searched the place, finding nothing.

"Well, that was fruitful," Kochi said sarcastically, and they left the Wind Shrine, having disturbed nothing in there. "Are we satisfied?"

Matsuri shot daggers at him, furious. "Asshole."

The tracker ignored her, and Sendai pointed away from the shrine.

"There is a place over that way we should check," he said.

Nobody complained as they started moving again. Sakura kept her eye out, trying to look through the soft upturn of sand around them, and worried that a sandstorm was imminent. She wasn't an expert or anything, but this weird sand felt like an omen to her. It wasn't long before they found what Sendai was indicating toward.

"An oasis in the desert?" Sakura asked.

Sendai nodded. "The desert is littered with them. This one is the closest to the Wind Shrine, so we're in the expanse of what was once called Nara Desert."

"Nara?" The name intrigued her. "Back in Konoha, we have a forest called Nara Forest; it belongs to the Nara clan."

"Shikamaru's clan?" Matsuri asked.

Sakura nodded, smiling as the Chunin took the time to cup water into her hands from the spring-like oasis. The pinkette joined in as the boys looked the area over. It was incredible. Who knew water could taste _this_ good. It made the water she drank back home seem like mud by comparison. Clear and crystal; it sparkled with purity.

"Funny that," she said softly.

There were no chakra signatures nearby and Sakura was beginning to think they would never find Gaara. She swallowed heavily, licking her lips and biting back the tears. The idea of never seeing him again made her want to cry, and she felt like hitting something. It would seem she was wrong not to care when she'd first heard that he had left.

' _Do I care?'_

It suddenly occurred to her that she _did_. Why else would she be reacting this way? Thinking a tracking squad would quickly find him had made it more comfortable for her to pretend it didn't bother her. Matsuri turned away from Sakura, and the pinkette took the opportunity to wipe her eye as a single tear started to caress her cheek. She needed to see him, to _find_ him. She looked away from where Sendai and Kochi were and froze in place.

Sakura blinked heavily, squeezing her eyes shut for a moment and then looked back up into the sun. The image was gone, but she knew someone had been standing there, watching them... or _her_.

"Lady Haruno?"

Matsuri was looking at her oddly.

"Did you see that?" Sakura whispered, pointing.

Matsuri looked but shook her head. "There's nothing there." She stared at the pinkette as if pink hair meant she was crazy by default. "What did you see?"

"A person. I thought I saw a person."

"Wait here," Sendai said, having returned, and he and Kochi moved toward where she had pointed.

Matsuri continued to look at her strangely, and to keep herself from yelling at the Chunin (she _hated_ being stared at), Sakura turned back toward the oasis water and took another cup of water she didn't _need_. She kept her face impassive as the boys returned a minute later.

"There's nothing and no-one there," Kochi said, annoyed. "Waste of time."

Sakura shook her head at him. "Nothing is a waste of time in search and retrieval. How long have you been a tracker ninja anyway?"

Matsuri giggled and Sendai glanced at his partner.

"Well, anyway," the calmer of the two trackers said through his mask. "The sun will soon set, so we should head back and report to the council."

They turned away from the oasis and headed back toward Suna, their time having expired. No team was meant to be out here for more than a day, it was too dangerous, what with the sandstorms, and possibility of running into rogue ninja – the problem with Ame not solving itself of course. Matsuri was the most disappointed by this, Sakura could tell – more proof that the Chunin had a crush on the Kazekage. But when they returned, another team would take their place. This was the most efficient way of maximising searches with the least amount of exhaustion. The council was being careful by anticipating, but not quite expecting teams to get ambushed.

The pinkette glanced back at the oasis as they left, more sure now than ever that she had indeed seen _something_ in the glint of the sun.

' _Sakura…'_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	9. The Bitter Jinchuriki.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes

Sakura Haruno was pacing. She hadn't done this for a long time, and she only felt comfortable doing it right now because she was alone. The worry she had for Gaara was rapidly being replaced by anger. What the _hell_ was he trying to prove by taking off? If it was concern for her, she was due to return to Konoha in a day or two anyway, and if he wanted, she would never return. At least until he got himself under control.

' _Why me?'_ She thought, whimpering.

It was so weird to her that it had taken her this long to ask that question. Why had Gaara fixated on her? No wait, that was the wrong question. Why had _Shukaku_ fixated on her? She had probed Temari discreetly, discovering that Gaara didn't spend time alone with anyone other than his siblings or squad captains when going over reports and such. But still, the question _was_ valid.

' _Why me?'_

Could he… no. She shook her head. The Kazekage was clearly attracted to her, as she was to him, but that didn't mean he had _feelings_ for her, right? She groaned, sitting back onto her bed. Alone in the room she was sharing with Ino, Sakura had decided to come back here after the group she had gone out to the desert with had given their report. She couldn't stand out the council chambers and wait. The desire to burst and yell out everything was too strong. These people venerated Gaara; he was more than their Kazekage, he was their saviour. To them, he could do no wrong, even if he did it right in front of them.

She sighed and stared down at her hands, wishing she was back in Konoha. There, everything made sense. And when she had a problem there were so many people in Konoha she trusted that she could speak to. She went to Ino when deciding what to wear to some blind date (although she'd been avoiding _that_ lately). She went to Iruka Sensei when she got nostalgic over "the old days" back at the academy. She went to the Hokage, her former Sensei Kakashi Hatake when her issue was about her position in the squads he always put her on (they _had_ been rather erratic lately). She went to Shizune when she needed to talk medical, and she sought out Naruto and Sai for those times when she missed being a part of Team Kakashi.

Now, she felt like there was no-one she could talk to. And she hated Gaara for that.

She stood and walked over to the terrace. The sun had set and she was tired from the day she had wasted looking for Gaara. And despite her anger at him, her desire to see him again had not waned. But this was bordering on ridiculous.

"Sakura?"

Ino Yamanaka had opened the door and strode in without the pinkette realising. Her voice startled her.

"Oh, Ino. What is it?"

"The council wishes to speak with us."

That sounded ominous. Sakura nodded her head. "Sure, I'm coming."

Ino kept glancing at her, but stopped when Sakura glared back.

They knocked and entered the council chambers when instructed. Naruto and Shikamaru were already in here, the cloud watcher looking bored and the knucklehead furious, though in a sedate and respectful way. There were eight councillors in the room, seated around the rectangular table. Sakura didn't remember all their names, but the one that addressed them was called Osaku Kosashuma.

"Welcome and thank you for coming. Naruto Uzumaki, Shikamaru Nara, Ino Yamanaka, and Sakura Haruno, we have asked you here to thank you for your support and to inform you that the search for our Kazekage has now been officially suspended."

Naruto growled softly at that, but Sakura had the distinct impression he already knew. She noted he had a messenger scroll in his clenched fists. Curious. Osaku continued however, as if Naruto hadn't made a single sound.

"Your Hokage has sent a carrier bird with information and new orders. Naruto?"

The blonde knucklehead nodded and turned to face his fellow leaf ninjas. "Here, it's in this scroll."

Ino took it, read it, sighed, and passed it to Sakura, who also, was not surprised at the fact that Kakashi was recalling them. From his perspective, there was nothing more to do about this situation.

Sakura handed the scroll out toward Naruto, who was staring at her angrily. She didn't flinch as he snatched the scroll but the feral look on his face told her what was coming.

"So Sakura, looks like you're getting your wish."

"What wish would that be?" She asked evenly.

He ignored the fact that the council was watching and listening intently, every one of them surprised by the venom in his voice. It seemed that this had been building up in him for awhile. Sakura wished he would at least wait until they were out of earshot of anyone else before he finally snapped at her.

"Oh come on, you remember. You didn't want to even come to Suna in the first place, right? Now we're going back earlier than planned. This is what you wanted."

" _Naruto_!" Ino snapped. "As if Sakura would ever –"

But she cut off as the pinkette held up a hand to stop her. Sakura stared at Naruto, not recognising his expression. She knew he saw Gaara as good as a brother, more deeper than _that_ even. They had both suffered so much, and for so long, so if there was anyone he would defend to Sakura, it would be the youngest of the sand siblings. But this didn't mean he had any idea what he was talking about.

"What is it you're trying to say Naruto?" She asked calmly. "That I'm _glad_ Gaara disappeared?"

"Well, no, but the Sakura I used to know would definitely care that he might be hurt or captured. But you're as cold as ice. I'm getting tired of this frozen exterior of yours and I'm starting to wonder where it's all coming from. You're turning into _Sasuke_."

He spat Sasuke's name at her, like he was daring her to retaliate, to show emotion. There was a collective gasp from several council members and Ino clenched her fists. Shikamaru, for his part, was staring at Naruto, slightly annoyed, but not looking like he was ready to berate him anytime soon. Perhaps he agreed with the knucklehead. Sakura though, couldn't help but not care about what Naruto had just said. But this made her wonder. Did she really come across that cold? She couldn't muster the anger he was looking for, the proof that she did indeed care. But his words were hurting her, even if she wasn't showing it.

Before all of this mess with Gaara had started, she might've already started to tear up at those words. Naruto's caring and open personality would make her doubt the seriousness of his words if he hadn't put so much venom into them. He was not one to snap at her like this. But even when he went off at an enemy ninja about _their_ lack of caring and humanism, he would never hit them like _this_.

So he was goading her huh? He wanted to see if she would react the same way as he'd imagined in his head. She was surprised, and had to keep reminding herself that _he_ had changed a lot over the last couple of years as well, not just since they were both still Genins. But still, Sakura wasn't the person he wanted her to be. She couldn't be. And honestly, she wasn't sure _how_ to react to what he had just said. He was staring angrily at her and she didn't know what to say. Finally, she decided to ignore his tone of voice at least.

"I'm sorry you feel that way Naruto," she said evenly. "After all, you've been wrong about him before."

Sakura didn't give him time to react and bowed to the stunned council members. "Councillors."

Her head was still down when she heard it.

' _Sakura…'_

She took a moment to stand up, and Naruto's expression softened slightly at the hint of concern on her face. Sakura steadied her expression, turned, and left the room. Ino bowed respectfully as well and followed her friend.

"Sakura, wait!"

The blonde caught up outside the Kazekage mansion. She was terrified by the indifferent look on her friend's face.

"You should've pummelled him," she said, "talking to you about Sasuke like that."

Sakura smiled slightly at that and Ino giggled, hugging her. "There's the billboard brow smile I love so much."

"I'm sorry Ino."

"Don't be. Naruto's the one who started that."

Sakura held tighter to her, her head on her shoulder. "That's not what I meant. I'm apologising for being a cold bitch."

Ino pulled away and looked at her. "You're not a cold bitch. You're just unfocused. Whatever is bothering you is turning you into some frightened animal, hiding from yourself."

Sakura smirked. "When did you get so wise?"

"Hey, I always have been. Don't forget who brought you out of your clammy shell when we were kids, okay?"

"Yeah, that was Hinata, right?"

Ino slapped her arm. "Just because you have superhuman strength doesn't mean I won't try to hit you, girly." She smiled. "Feel like telling me what's been bothering you for the last two years?"

"Nothing's bothering me."

"Don't lie to your best friend."

"You've already bugged about this like a thousand times, Ino _pig_."

"Well then, consider this number one thousand and one. You can't keep this to yourself forever."

' **Why not?'**

' _Shut it you,'_ Sakura mentally slapped her inner.

Somewhere deep down, Sakura knew that her friends wouldn't stop pestering her, but she had been stubborn and threatening toward them when they brought it up. They were starting it up again, beginning with pressuring Gaara into confronting her, which she was sure he had _not_ wanted to do. She surmised from the reports on his disappearances that _she_ had definitely been the last person to see him. This wasn't going to end well if she kept holding onto her secret, but she wanted to speak to Gaara first. She _needed_ to.

As she mused on the best ways to do exactly that (nothing formed very strongly in her mind), Ino linked arms with her and pulled her along for the ride as she strode along. They were headed back to the apartment. The sun had long since set, and Sakura guessed it was about eight o'clock. She needed to sleep, but found herself tugging on Ino softly.

"Come on," she said, "let's go see what kind of drinks these Suna bartenders will sell us."

Ino grinned. Finally, her friend was looking at this situation with a glass is half full attitude.

"Alright!" She yelled. "You _have_ to try the Wind Petal."

"The _what_ now?"

"It's delicious," the blonde said, now steering them toward her favourite bar here in Suna. "And the bartenders at The Zephyr are always _hot_!"

"The Zephyr?"

"Yeah. _The_ place to drown your sorrows, and maybe share them," she said, winking playfully at her. "Or at least get laid."

"At least."

"You're repeating me Sakura."

"And now you sound like Kakashi."

They entered The Zephyr moments later and Sakura glanced in the direction of the bar before being propelled toward it by the annoying blonde. The guy behind there had short blonde hair, blue eyes, and a twinkle in said eyes when he spotted Ino.

' _Another of Ino's "out of Konoha" conquests,'_ Sakura mused to herself.

"Hi Ari," Ino said sweetly. "Two Wind Petals, and hold the lemon on one of them, okay?"

They started chatting when the drinks arrived and Sakura ignored them, sipping on her drink (it looked like liquid lemon with swirls of red, and tasted slightly like lemon, but more like strawberries). She scanned the tables, looking over everything, and everyone. But nothing took her fancy. She wasn't really here for some guy anyway, just to have something to drink and try to forget Naruto and his _goading_.

But a few minutes later, an extremely good looking civilian came up to her: his amber eyes appraised her as he smiled a charming smile. He introduced himself and she told him her name. His eyebrows rose slightly, but he didn't comment. They got to talking, and she decided she liked him; well, enough to keep talking to him anyway. He was talkative, but not like Naruto. He was open, but not like Ino, and he was intelligent… okay, _like_ Shikamaru.

His name was Orashi Marina, he was twenty-three and _hot_. He worked in the heavy labour business and had been living in Suna most of his life. He had been born in the land of tea, and then moved to the land of fire when he was only five, only for his parents to move them to the land of wind less than six months later. The outlying town he lived in was called Mazuku Town, only ten miles away from the land of birds. Then he moved to Suna for the last time when he was eight. His father had gotten a job here and they discovered some estranged family here.

Really, Sakura was interested in his life story. It made a nice change from her own. But as this guy continued to look her over suggestively and inquire about _her_ , she kept thinking about Gaara. She couldn't get that face out of her mind, that gorgeous crimson hair and stunning _body_ of his.

"So, you're a ninja?"

"Huh?" Sakura was dragged out of her reverie.

"I said, so, you're a ninja?" Orashi looked at her inquiringly.

She nodded. Sakura had her leaf headband on because it was procedure when in another village. He glanced at it, the look on his face telling her he knew _exactly_ where she was from. Perhaps he knew more than that, now knowing her name. She was well known outside of ninja circles as well. She caught him staring at her.

"Yeah," she said. "Just in Suna for a short time. Leaving in the morning."

"So you're letting off some steam before heading back?"

Sakura nodded. If things were different, she'd probably consider sleeping with this man. He a look on his face like he was hoping she would, but waiting for her to suggest it. She wondered if Shikamaru was _this_ intelligent when trying to pick up a woman. Orashi obviously wasn't turned off by the ninja clothes or gear, not that she was "stocked up" as the term went. So maybe he preferred Kunoichi lovers. She smiled at that.

But no matter how hot he was, it wasn't going to happen, and she supposed it would be wrong to keep talking to him, since he was clearly getting his hopes up. She stood straighter.

"I think I've had enough to drink, I should head back to my apartment. You're cute, but it's not happening, sorry."

' **A bit too forward girl. Do you want this complete stranger to hate us?'**

' _He'll get over it.'_

She walked away, regretting her abrupt exit, but knowing that a guy like that was probably raking the bar with his eyes, looking for another girl to turn the charms on. The truth was, Sakura wasn't used to being "picked up", despite the fact that back in Konoha a lot of guys were trying to get in her pants. She just didn't have as much interest in the majority of them that they seemed to have in her.

She made it as far as the exit before Ino grabbed her arm gently.

"You're leaving alone?" The blonde asked.

Sakura nodded.

Ino sighed. "You really are hopeless. We leave Suna in the morning, you should enjoy your last night here. That guy you were talking to was so _cute_ girl. Don't you think you've earned this?"

"Not the point Ino pig," Sakura said. "I'm going to bed, _alone_. That's the point."

Ino sighed again and let Sakura go with no further ado. She spotted Naruto and Shikamaru a little while later, having arrived only minutes after Sakura had left. Somehow, she just _knew_ this was Naruto's fault, and pushed her way over to him, intending on knocking him out.

X X X

The scraping sound was coming closer. It scared Gaara, no matter what he told himself. No matter how hard he tried to ignore it. But what _was_ it? It was the sound of metal on metal. An axe being dragged along the concrete floor as the person pulling on it came closer, slowly but surely.

He was bleeding only minutely, the sand no longer his ally. His warden had seen to it that he was unable to use his chakra, and somehow, this had prevented his sand defence. The sand that rushed to his aid was gone. They were all gone, everyone. The council had given up on finding him. His siblings had moved on, and Sakura…

How could she forget him?

' _Mother.'_

No, the demon was not his mother.

' **AND YET HERE I AM, WHEN NO-ONE ELSE HAS SEEN FIT TO LOOK FOR YOU.'**

He could not trust that _thing_. It told him everyone hated him, it kept whispering that they had all abandoned him. Yet he had seen Sakura searching for him, through the eyes of the demon. It didn't want him to see that, so trapped him in here again. This was the place he went to when Shukaku took control of his body. But right now, wherever he _really_ was, the demon didn't want him to know what it was doing. The only hope he had was that someone would come along and kill him. The Ame rogues perhaps.

There was nothing left for him. Shukaku was going to make sure of that, as soon as it could get him close enough to Suna before he stopped it from entering the high walled village… _again_. It wanted Sakura dead. It wanted everyone dead. And if Gaara entered Suna, he feared he would not be able to prevent the full transformation. He would be possessed and might never regain control. It wanted to watch him suffer, to watch as it slaughtered his _precious_ village.

His _desire_ to return and find Sakura and be with her was a weakness that demon was exploiting. Images hit him and he cried again, like he had the night Yashamaru had tried to kill him. There was no way that was going to happen again. She deserved better.

' **THEY ALL DESERVE DEATH MY LITTLE JICHURIKI. AND AS SOON AS YOU ACCEPT THAT, I'LL LEAVE YOU BE.'**

Gaara looked up suddenly; he looked out of his prison and into the face of Shukaku.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	10. Voices In The Night.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm late, I know! Hope you enjoy. ^_^

Ino Yamanaka entered to the room she shared with Sakura with trepidation. She noted that her friend was already dressed for bed and tucked under the covers, her back to the door. The blonde sighed and undressed as she rummaged around in her belongings for her bed clothes. She was certain Sakura was still awake, but ignoring her. She pretended to think Sakura was asleep and dressed, slipping between the sheets of her own bed.

Ino had been looking to hook up with Ari tonight, the bartender at The Zephyr, but couldn't seem to stop thinking about Sakura and found herself wanting to come back and make sure her friend was alright. That fell through of course, once the pinkette made it clear that she wanted to be left alone, by ignoring her. The blonde loved her friend but was beginning to get frustrated. She watched Sakura for a while before closing her eyes, actually trying to get to sleep, now that it was getting late.

Certain from her laboured breathing that Ino was indeed asleep, Sakura shifted her head to glance at her.

' _Good.'_

But the pinkette couldn't sleep. She stared out the window from her position on the bed, thinking about Gaara. Ino had fallen asleep quickly, so she didn't hear the renewed sounds of Sakura sniffling that escaped the pinkette's mouth as Sakura wondered where Gaara was, what he was doing. She had returned to the room, finding herself on the verge of tears and unable to stop them once they started. The last thing she needed was for Ino to realise this.

And come morning she would have to leave Suna, but she didn't want to. She wanted to stay in the land of wind, at least until Gaara came back. She rolled over to stare at the ceiling. As if that was the simplest thing. That he would suddenly turn up at the entrance to the village like nothing was amiss, with an excuse that would satisfy the council and everything would go back to the way it was before.

' _Before I found myself too scared to be in the same room as him.'_

But she wasn't scared of him anymore. He had stopped himself from raping her again, and she knew that he had never wanted to hurt her. Somehow, this made her feel warm; loved perhaps. She closed her eyes and tried to sleep. Distant sounds of small birds and a light twitter that made her think of the birds back home: the ones that drew the attention of the higher levelled ninja trained to respond to their call.

All day she had heard Gaara's voice in her head, on top of that inner version of herself. She was mentally challenged, she was willing to admit it, but _this_ had felt different. It was as though Gaara was actually with her, in her mind, calling to her. She could _feel_ him, all around her. It sounded so ridiculous, she knew, but with everything she was feeling and all that had happened between them, Sakura did not doubt that the voice in her head was Gaara's. She groaned at herself.

' _Go to sleep!'_

X X X

Eventually, Sakura fell into a restless sleep. Arguing with Naruto and enduring his hateful words had exhausted her more than she'd realised. It was a few minutes before she started to dream, but to Sakura, this was real.

She was standing in the doorway to the Kazekage's bedroom, dressed only in a semi-transparent dressing gown. The warmth in Suna indicated to a heat wave, but being in the desert, this wasn't unheard of. Sakura walked up to Gaara, who was sitting on the edge of his bed, watching her intently. He wore only a thin shirt and pants, not hot in this weather as he was more used to it. Sakura of course, was already sweating. This was why she had nothing on under the gown.

He kept his face impassive, but his roving eyes told her what he was thinking. She was so beautiful to him, he had told her this already, but it was nice to see it proven. She stood directly in front of him, his eyes widened slightly and she knew that he could see straight through the thin material covering her naked form. He reached out, ghosted his hand over her curves, inhaling deeply at the sight.

Sakura traced the kanji for love on his forehead as Gaara undid the tie on her gown and let it drop to the floor noiselessly. His hands brushed her skin this time, just soaking in the sight and feel of her. Then his hand ran down her collar bone, trickling over her breasts, making her sigh deeply. He smiled at that and took a hold of her, pulling her toward him and onto his lap. She giggled, pushing him onto his back and helping him with his clothes.

His shirt came first, and then she tugged on his pants, moving down with the material and kicking it off the bed with her foot. He looked better without them anyway. She climbed on top of him as he shifted on the bed, moving toward the pillows. He ran his hands up, along her legs, brushing her soft skin seductively as she bit her bottom lip. He was such a tease.

Sakura leant forward to kiss his lips, forcing his hands to move out of the way and he instead became very interested with her breasts, cupping them and rubbing his thumbs in circles around the areolas. She was hard for him, feeling the moistening between her legs as she moved her kisses from his face and started trailing down toward his pelvis. She took the time to run her teeth over his nipples along the way, making him moan softly.

Sakura ran her hand along his shaft, the muscle twitching at the slightest touch and Gaara's excitement increased the volume of his reaction. She licked him softly, her hot breath increasing the stimulation as she massaged him with her hands and slid her mouth over the bulbous of his tip. He grunted, rising under her ministrations, and she pulled away before he could go too far.

Gaara flipped her onto her back and she let out a yelp of surprise. Those pale eyes stared hungrily down at her and she grinned, moving her legs to give him better access to her. He kissed her lips, the force of his mouth smothering. Then he mimicked her and moved his tongue down over her chin and jaw line but bit her skin as he went, _hard_. He left his mark along her flesh, stopping at her chest.

He suckled her breasts, using his tongue to play with the nipples. She moaned, gripping his hair tightly as he bit her again: hard enough to elicit a groan, but not to break skin. Sakura grunted his name, pleadingly and he continued south. She had never been so turned on in her life. He was using his teeth again, the pain mixed in with pleasure as he nibbled on her clit, his tongue lapping up her juices. She closed her eyes and cried out as he thrust his tongue inside of her and her body shuddered and writhed with every push.

Sakura came into his mouth and a moment later, snapped her eyes open, as she tasted herself on her mouth. Gaara was kissing her again, intermittent with moaning her name. He pressed up against her, aligning their bodies and lowered himself as she ran her hands along his back. She lifted her hips to meet him as he thrust into her and Sakura held on for dear life. Her vocalisation increased and she closed her eyes, feeling him squeeze her to his chest as he moved faster and faster with every beat.

That deep, sensual voice she loved so much moaned into her ear. "Sakura…"

She gripped him tighter, screaming his name.

"Sakura, wake up!"

Ino was shaking her, interrupting her thoughts.

Sakura rolled over and opened her eyes, glaring at her smirking best friend. She needed a moment to realise what had just happened and swallowed thickly, remembering now that she had just dreamed herself into the arms of the Kazekage. She groaned and sat up, realising also that Ino was sitting on her bed as well.

Ino grinned at the embarrassed look on her face. "Forehead, snap out of it. Stop moaning and sighing, you're turning me on."

"Don't even, Ino. You interrupted a good dream."

"Obviously, but you interrupted me first. I was making out with Genma and your screaming came at that pinnacle moment, you know, when you –"

"Shush." Sakura put a finger to her friend's lips. "That sounds like you were more than just making out."

Ino shrugged. "It's a euphuism really. But you get the idea. I was just getting to the good part, that –"

"Wait, I was screaming?" Sakura interrupted her again.

She remembered screaming Gaara's name in her dream and wondered if that had come out clearly, to Ino's ears. Her friend rolled her eyes and nodded her head.

"But as usual, you made no sense. Exactly _who_ were you dreaming about?"

Sakura felt her face warm. "No-one, go back to sleep Ino."

The blonde stared at the pinkette, but Sakura was stubborn. So Ino just shrugged her shoulders.

"Fine, billboard brow, but you know it's inevitable. Whatever your secret liaison, I'll figure it out. You can't keep good sex from me."

Sakura groaned, lay back on the bed, and rolled away from her as Ino snickered.

But as the eventual sounds of Ino falling asleep reached her ears, Sakura could not reclaim her own sleep... _again_. She stood up and walked over to the terrace, still thinking about her dream, and the way she had screamed Gaara's name. She had a real memory of what it felt like to have him hold her close and push inside of her. It made her tremble just thinking about it.

Her hand went to her stomach and moved slowly downward as Sakura closed her eyes to the sensations building in her body. Seeing Gaara like that had brought on a stronger reaction in her than she had thought possible. He was so striking, his hair, that handsome face, that _perfect_ physique. She couldn't stop the rush of pleasure she had felt. She knew that she had feelings for him, and that had things turned out differently, she would've started a relationship with him, at least, as much of one as she could, living so far apart. Her dreams also included her falling madly in love with him, moving to Suna, and marrying him. She'd often wondered if she wanted a family. All those years ago, when she was head over heels in love with Sasuke Uchiha, she had never doubted this was what she wanted.

And then Sasuke died. She started dating Naruto, and the blonde knucklehead had been her _first_. That hadn't lasted of course, because her heart wasn't really in it. Then Gaara had raped her. Looking back, she saw the common denominator. She _sucked_ when it came to men. She liked the ones who didn't like her, and when one had feelings for _her_ , she couldn't return said feelings. Then had come the violence of her "encounter" with Gaara, which was still haunting her. She knew the Kazekage was no pervert or serial rapist, even though the thought had occurred to her at the time. His demon was stronger than his restraint it had seemed to her. But he wasn't a monster, so she inevitably started to blame the entire thing on herself. Her "inner" told her off for this however and she'd returned to being confused about how the whole thing had even happened. But now…

But now Gaara was gone, adding fuel to the part of her that still blamed herself. She had not seen him lose control like he had in that abandoned building before, not since that day in the Wind Shrine. Of course, even then it was only reminiscent of the half transformed Shinobi she had tried to defend Sasuke against, in the woods outside Konoha. And now he had disappeared without a trace. Yet she could still _feel_ the contours of his body against hers, the way he moved as he hovered over her, the way he had _loved_ her in her dream.

Sakura stared out over Suna, and sighed deeply, distraught. She stopped moving her hand and looked down at it, half surprised at herself. Of course she was stroking herself; she had just woken from a sex dream about Gaara!

Despite what she had said to Naruto, she was desperate to find Gaara. She had to apologise to him, to tell him she had long forgiven him, and that she didn't blame him for his latest "attack" on her. She had no idea what it was like to have a monster inside of her. And although Naruto's bijuu was clearly not having this kind of destructive effect, she was certain there was a perfectly good explanation for Gaara's deteriorating mental state.

' _And I'm going to find out what it is.'_

Glancing backward, to make sure that Ino was still fast asleep, Sakura closed her eyes, trying to hear that voice again. It was Gaara's voice, she was certain. But _how_?

' **It doesn't matter** **how** **, now just shut up, and concentrate.'**

' _Alright, alright.'_

She focused on her memory of the last time she'd heard that soft, monotone voice in her head. She had just bowed respectfully to the Suna council after ignoring the venomous tone Naruto when she wasn't as obviously distraught over the disappearance of the Kazekage. Gaara's deep voice laced her thoughts almost immediately.

' _Sakura…'_

She had been surprised by the sound although it wasn't the first instance in which she'd heard him whisper her name. And of course, the hurt expression on Naruto's face was at that moment tearing at Sakura's heart, but she kept herself rigid. Her desire to hide the fact that Gaara's disappearance was ripping her apart inside had resulted in her putting too much apathy behind the tone in _her_ voice, like he was unimportant. Naruto had no idea that the Kazekage meant more to her than she could put into words, so his response to her had been laced with a strong harshness to his voice.

Sakura sighed, forcing herself to stop thinking about how his words had hurt her and focused entirely on Gaara. The first time she'd heard his voice in her head had been during the mission to Ame. It was still ongoing, even now. That problem wasn't going to solve itself overnight. But Suna had bigger concerns now, what with Gaara disappearing in the middle of the night, and with no trace.

Much like the third Kazekage.

' **Concentrate on the voice.'**

That deep, sensual voice.

' _Sakura…'_

Sakura's eyes snapped open and suddenly she knew where to go. He had been trying to tell her, to show her, perhaps with the power of his demon, and she had been so _blind_! She packed a single bag, changed into her full ninja gear, and was just throwing a travelling cloak over herself to combat the night air, when Ino stirred in her bed.

' _Now, of all times!'_

How many times during the night did Ino usually wake up? This was more than inconvenient, it was crazy!

"Sakura, are you going somewhere?" Ino asked, rubbing her eyes sleepily.

"Yes Ino, but I'll be back."

"We have our orders. We're not supposed to leave Suna until tomorrow. Where are you going?"

"Just for a walk."

Ino snorted, now sitting up. "And I'm pregnant, with triplets no less. Really, where are you going at this time of night? Not back to Konoha, without the rest of us?" She lowered her voice. "I know Naruto –"

"This has nothing to do with Naruto."

Sakura sat down next to her, feeling guilty. She knew her friend would not allow her to leave, and would raise the alarm if she tried to jump out the window right now. It was expected of her after all. So now, there was only one way this was going to end quietly. Her saving grace was that Ino wasn't expecting this.

"Hand me that, would you?" Sakura asked, pointing to the book on the bedside table.

Ino looked around, spotted it, and reached toward the book Sakura had loaned her. But before her fingers could grasp it, she let out a small gasp and fell forward, stretched out over the width of the bed. The pinkette had used minimal force. Just enough to knock Ino out, but it was mostly because of her medical training that she knew which part of the brain to strike, with just enough chakra to starve it of oxygen temporarily.

The sleep induced effect was instantaneous.

' **She should be unconscious for at least the rest of the night.'**

' _I know, shut_ _up_ _.'_

Sakura tucked her friend back into bed and walked out onto the terrace. It was time to go bring the Kazekage home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	11. Awoken.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

Ino Yamanaka woke groggily the next morning, both hazy and dizzy. She felt _weird_. It took her a moment, staring at the ceiling, to realise what had happened. It hit her on the back of the head with a dull thud, reminding her of the pain throbbing on her scalp. But there was no pain right now. Startled, she sat up quickly.

"Wait, what!"

She jumped out of bed, dressed into her full ninja clothes, and ran into the room next door without so much as knocking or worrying if Naruto or Shikamaru were even _decent_ this time of the morning. Both were predictably still asleep, making her indifferent to waking them up at this hour. The sun was about to peek into the room, and most _normal_ ninja were used to waking up before now anyway. Shikamaru was the laziest person she knew, and Naruto was just a knucklehead. That was the only cause for them sleeping so _much_.

Ino shook Shikamaru gently to wake him, then rougher and rougher until he gave up pretending to be asleep and then throttled Naruto for good measure. The cloud watcher just yawned at her from his horizontal position, not caring enough to sit up, but Naruto sat up and rubbed his eyes sleepily as he groaned. He was the one who spoke, seeing as though Shikamaru couldn't be bothered.

"Alright, alright, I'm up! What's your problem?"

"Oh, get out of it Naruto," she said, despite her sense of urgency. "Do you speak to Hinata like that in the morning?"

Naruto blushed slightly. " _No_. But she's my wife Ino. And usually in the morning we –"

"Don't want to know," she said. "Look, Naruto, Shikamaru, Sakura is _gone_."

"Explain _'gone'_ ," Shikamaru yawned.

"I mean I woke up in the middle of the night and she was getting dressed to go somewhere and then she knocked me unconscious and wasn't there when I woke up."

Naruto jumped out of bed in his typical way and clenched his fists. "What?"

"Oh, _that_ kind of _'gone'_ ," the lazy ass cloud watcher said, looking frustrated now.

Ino groaned. "You could at least _pretend_ to be concerned, Shikamaru."

"I _am_ concerned Ino," he said. "It sounds like she's finally snapped. She's been even more _troublesome_ for a while now."

Ino huffed. "I expected more from you. Okay, I'll go tell Temari. You two dress and pack. I'll be back."

She stormed out, leaving Naruto looking even more confused and Shikamaru contemplating the implications of Sakura's recent weird behaviour. Still laying back, his hands resting under the back of his head, he stared at the ceiling. He hoped Sakura was okay, despite Ino's belief he didn't care. He was surprised more than anything, that's all. No matter how strangely Sakura had been acting, he would _never_ have predicted she would just fly the coop.

"What the _hell_ are you doing Shikamaru?" Naruto asked. "Ino said to get up."

"Ino isn't the boss," Shikamaru said, sitting up and yawning. "And rushing will get us nowhere, Naruto. We don't even know if we'll actually be leaving now. Sakura has gone and disappeared, and we can't go back without her."

It was true that they had received orders to return to Konoha, but the scope of the mission could be changed if something drastic had happened, like say, a pink haired Kunoichi finally snapping and knocking Ino unconscious. Despite the gravity of the situation, Shikamaru smiled inwardly. He only hoped that when they finally caught up with her, that the two friends didn't go at it again. Naruto might get a kick out of it, but _he_ had no intention of having to carry them all the way back to the leaf.

"Right," Naruto said, slowing himself down enough not to at least not panic anymore. "You're right."

Shikamaru swung his legs over the edge of the bed and stared at the blonde. His outburst last night had taken everyone by surprise. Who would've thought Naruto would say such a thing? But looking at him now, Shikamaru could've sworn it was a different Naruto, perhaps one with a split personality. He was genuinely worried over the pinkette, and if he had not been married to Hinata, Shikamaru would've accused the blonde of still being in love with Sakura.

"You miss her," he stated seriously.

Naruto finished packing, having found all his wayward possessions. "To who are you referring?"

"Sakura."

The blonde twitched slightly at the name, sitting on his rumpled bed. "You think I still like her that way?"

Shikamaru didn't respond. He just stared at him. Naruto smiled.

"I'll always love Sakura, but not the way I love Hinata. Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if she had returned my feelings and we'd stayed together, but then I remember Hinata, and the way she makes me feel. There really is no comparison."

"Sometimes you say something so smart I wonder if you were kidnapped by the Akatsuki, cloned and left to die in some ditch somewhere, while we got stuck with a more mature version."

Naruto laughed. "I gotta grow up sometime."

"Just not fast enough."

The blonde groaned. "Shut up Shikamaru."

Shikamaru chuckled, stretched, and yawned again. He looked around, spotted his bag, and hefted it up onto his lap. He had packed last night, never one to ignore the smarter course of action. He considered having a shower, now that Sakura was M.I.A, but decided against it. He'd had one last night, and they could be sent off at any moment.

"What about you?" Naruto asked, as Shikamaru's attention drifted outside the window. He could see the low laying clouds from here.

"What about me?" He asked, not looking away from the sky.

"When are you going to settle down?"

Shikamaru glanced at the blonde and tugged his bag tighter to his chest. The truth was that there _was_ someone he liked. But she wasn't the woman his mother and father were pestering him to spend more time with. He sighed, deciding to ignore the question until he knew how to answer it.

"We should go," he said, "find out if the council still wants us to leave or not."

' _And find our missing team mate.'_

Something other than finding Sakura and dragging her back to Konoha kicking and screaming had to be done. Perhaps it was time the Hokage took this as an excuse to _demand_ to know what was wrong with her. She wouldn't refuse him if it was an order, right?

X X X

Temari was just getting ready to go see if the Konoha representatives were ready when she stopped herself and read the letter from the Hokage again. She had just finished re-reading it and wanted to look at it again. He had personally sent this letter to her and Kankuro to offer his condolences on Gaara and his well wishes for their continued search for their Kazekage. But it was just words; he had to have known there was nothing more they could do. She looked at herself in her full length mirror and scoffed at what she saw. A tall, imposing blonde Kunoichi with an iron fan strapped to her back. If she didn't know better, she'd swear that was a different person staring back at her.

And some ninja she was, not being able to find her brother. He was out there right now, in the desert she thought she knew well enough to find _anyone_ who might be wandering through it. She had trained out in that hot sun and sand, she could navigate her way through it better than anyone she knew, except Gaara.

' _Did he run away and evade the pursuit team?'_

She shook her head. _No_ , he wouldn't do that! There was no reason for this. She put the letter back in her drawer, but hesitated to close it. The Konoha representatives were heading back to the leaf this morning to brief the Hokage, so that Kakashi could decide what Konoha's next move would be.

The thought brought a tear to her eye and she wiped it away hastily as Ino knocked on her door. Yes, she knew who it was. She saw Ino as good as a best friend. At least, a long distance one. The two had kept in contact since Ino left after the fallout from their recovery four years ago. After the Akatsuki failed to capture Gaara, Ino had been one of the many medical ninja sent to help. She wasn't as skilled as Sakura, but was still more proficient than any medic in Suna. The three girls – Temari, Ino and Sakura – had spent their off hours together, every time.

' _Except for when the_ _insane_ _pinkette refused to take a break.'_

"Come in," she said, forcing strength into her voice.

Ino looked distressed and Temari walked up to her hastily. "What's wrong?"

Ino told her everything, from waking up in the middle of the night to find Sakura dressed as though ready to leave Suna, then her friend striking her in the back of the head to knock her unconscious. Temari's eyes widened. This was too much of a coincidence: first Gaara, and then Sakura. At least they had proof that the pinkette had gone willingly. But what had possessed her to _attack_ her best friend?

"I'm worried what she's up to. This isn't like her," Ino was saying, as Temari continued to look stunned. "Okay, she left Konoha years ago to go try and kill Sasuke. But there's no reason for _this_."

"That we know of," Temari reminded her, recovering some of her sensibilities. "She hasn't been herself for a long while, remember?"

"Right." Ino nodded.

"I'll have the sentinels report to you about any suspicious activity last night. What time would you say she left?"

Ino thought about that. "After midnight; past that, I'm not sure."

"Okay." Temari moved to leave the room, but stopped to hug a distraught Ino. "We'll find her."

X X X

Knowing exactly where she was going, Sakura Haruno had taken no detours, and made no attempts to disguise her intentions (although she covered her tracks, not wanting any Suna pursuit squads to find her). Any ninja worth their salt knew how to travel without being tracked anyway. Only a high levelled tracker could follow her as she cast a strong genjutsu around herself.

She remembered heading this way less than a day ago, though right now the sun had barely started to show itself, and she'd been travelling in the dark all this time. From what she'd been told, that was actually the best time to travel in the desert. It was cooler, more difficult for enemy ninja to spot her, even with her pink hair, and was definitely safer. That alone would also make it faster: no impediments.

But now the sun was creeping up, and she glanced warily at it. She could feel the rise in temperature already, but it wasn't yet uncomfortable. She found her mind wandering, realising she was less than an hour from her destination. Somehow, in the distance, even though she couldn't see it yet, the presence of the Wind Shrine was overpowering for her. She had woken up in there after the trauma of being raped, her body sore, and bleeding. It had been a bad day for her, and she'd had plenty of _them_ already.

– **Flashback –**

_The world had hit her hard. She was certain for awhile there that she would die from the shock, pain, or the blood loss. But Sakura Haruno had survived; thank Kami. Yeah, this was called life. She was trembling, her muscles screaming at her, even though she had yet to move, and staring at an unfamiliar ceiling. It was like she had woken from a bad dream, only to be thrust head first into a nightmare._

_But Sakura was awake and aware of her surroundings, even if she wasn't entirely aware of_ _ where _ _she was. But it was clear in her mind. That was a door; this room was mostly dark, with only the light coming in from the other side of the door giving her a hint of what the ceiling looked like. Oh and look,_ _ that _ _was a low table, upon which had been placed a water gourd and a packed Shinobi lunch bearing the insignia of the sand village._

' _Sand_ _.'_

_Sakura groaned and forced her body to roll over as she eyed off the food and water warily. Had Gaara left them here? Why would he rape her and then take care of her? Thinking back over it, she remembered the strange aura around him, those weird, Shukaku eyes, and the tenderness in the way he looked at her right before…_

_She forced those thoughts out of her head and gingerly probed her inner thighs. Her chakra reserves were still low, but she risked a little to check out the damage. There was a little abrasion, but no bleeding. You didn't have to be a virgin to bleed from non-consensual sex. So, other than the pain and chafing, everything seemed okay. She removed her hand and swallowed heavily, with nothing more to distract her from how she was feeling._

_Sakura_ _ felt _ _like crying, the weight of what had just happened to her suffocating, but the tears did not come. She felt a slight stinging in the corner of her eyes, but that was it. She dry sobbed into her hands however, trying to blot out the memory of the violent assault on her mind and body. But the images would not go away._

_He had thrown her against a platform, held her tightly to him, ripped off her clothes, and_ _ raped _ _her! She couldn't grasp this, shuddering as she lowered her hands to stare at the open door. Was he still out there, waiting for her, and ready to go again? The thought froze her in place and an involuntary whimper left her lips. No_ _ way _ _, was she leaving this room to find out!_

_So Sakura stayed where she was, lying on her side and picturing worst case scenarios in which Gaara would take her beaten and bruised body, rape her over and over again, and then bury her in a ditch somewhere so no-one would ever know what he did._

' _What the hell am I thinking_ _?'_

_This was the Kazekage of the sand. There had to be a reason behind his actions. No, she would never forgive him, even if Shukaku did have something to do with this, but her desire to get to the bottom of this superseded her desire to not move from this spot until she was sure he wasn't waiting outside to ambush her._

_A strange kind of warmth started to permeate her body, as she didn't have the energy to move anymore. It was coming from her stomach, and it preceded a low growl that told her to stop delaying the inevitable. Obediently, she pushed herself up into a seated position and reached out to take the packed lunch. What she wouldn't give to have some syrup-coated anko dumplings or pickled plums right now; well at least this vacuum sealed food wasn't spicy. She shivered at that._

' _Gross_ _.'_

_She could see a little better now, her eyes having adjusted to the darkness of the room, and she took in every inch she could as she wolfed down the Suna specialty rations like they were cuisine. She was hungrier than she'd realised. With the food gone, she moved on to the water. It was by far the best water she'd had in a long time._

' _I'm losing my mind_ _,' she thought, wiping her mouth._

_Sakura placed the remains of her meal back on the low table and sighed deeply. A sharp stabbing pain in her abdomen drew her attention, but she dismissed it after checking it over with her chakra. There didn't_ _ seem _ _to be anything amiss. So it was probably just a result of her battle with the rogue ninja, or the twisting knot of having the Kazekage climax inside of her. She shivered._

_Well, there was nothing to be done about that by just sitting around in the dark. Fighting back her desire to dry sob again, she licked her lips tentatively, stunned by the broken skin (her mouth didn't hurt at all), and stood up. It actually took a few times before her disobedient legs started behaving and didn't buckle under her. She used the wall to get to the door, and let go of the support when she felt less confident of a relapse._

_It wasn't long before, even in her weakened state, she realised that Gaara was still nearby. He was just outside the small temple, or shrine, or whatever it was called. She hesitated, leaning against the stone pedestal in the middle of central dais in the main room. Then she remembered it was here where he'd pinned her after telling her to go away and half jumped away from it, as though stung._

_Oh well, nothing for it. She had to leave the temple at some point._

_Sakura moved toward the door and opened it tentatively. Gaara had his back to her, and stood up lazily as she glared at him. His face was impassive as usual and that only angered her more. But the sound of his voice hinted to the remorse in his heart._

" _Sakura…"_

_She stepped toward him, trying to summon chakra to her fist, but it wasn't coming. One of these days, she was going to hit him with it, she just knew it. And with that, Sakura's eyelashes fluttered. She fainted, falling forward and collapsing into the arms of the Kazekage… again._

– **End Flashback –**

Sakura had put that day behind her in one way, but not in others. She wasn't sure _how_ to move on from it, even though she knew for sure now that she was in love with Gaara. She would never have thought that possible, but last night, talking with that guy in the bar, Orashi Marina, had made her realise she didn't want anyone else. She could've just tossed in the towel, forgotten all about the Kazekage, gone back to Orashi's place, lost herself in those unusual amber eyes, and just gone with the flow. Normally, she would've at least given him a go, not that she'd been dating much lately, but the whole set up with having one night left before she had to go back to Konoha was perfect. And she was suspicious of perfect things.

Sakura shook her head as she recognised the sound of fighting in the distance, noting also the familiar shape of the Wind Shrine. The form standing on the right was definitely Gaara. She hurried her pace at the sight of him and her heart hammered when more distinctive battle sounds reached her ears. The Ame rogues! She stopped short of the battle field, watching Gaara transforming.

' _Kami,'_ she breathed.

Gaara had entered the first stage. She hadn't seen him this large since that day back at the Chunin exams. The Ame rogues screamed as jets of sand flew at them, crushing them out of existence. There was so much blood; Sakura could smell it from here. When Gaara turned around, having sensed she was there, the pinkette darted forward, toward him. The glint in his eyes looked murderous, but she didn't care. She had to stop Shukaku from taking Gaara over completely, even if it killed her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	12. Confessions.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

Sakura Haruno hesitated, looking into those diamond eyes as she stopped racing toward Gaara. He didn't attack, just staring at her, as if deciding what to do. She licked her parched lips, and started to move slowly toward him again, her heart racing. He was growling softly, like a wild animal being approached by a stranger they both feared and wanted to attack. Still, he didn't attack, waiting to see what she was doing.

Sakura took one step at a time, ignoring the stench of blood on the air, and focusing on the low tones he was emitting. They were oddly calming to her, even though she should fear him, although they could be easily interpreted as the warnings before his intention to attack her. But still, he did not move.

As the pinkette got closer, she saw the pained expression on his face. It was barely recognisable through the transformation, and despite the grotesque twisting created by Shukaku, she did not feel compelled to hate this man. Somewhere deep inside, he recognised her, and was attempting to restrain himself. She had no intention of fighting him when he was in this form, she wouldn't stand a chance. They had both grown so much since the first time she'd seen him like this, but no matter how much more powerful _she_ was, even after all the training from Tsunade, he was still the faster.

So she kept her advance toward him as smooth as possible, with no sudden movements, her face impassive. Even though _Gaara_ had no intention of harming her, Shukaku was clearly another matter. Sakura wanted to start talking to him, like she had when she'd talked him out of raping her, but swallowed heavily, uncertain what to say. He was eyeing her off and her ninja instincts were screaming at her to defend herself. She ignored them.

"Gaara…"

She kept her voice low and barely audible. It was all she could think of to say as he responded with another soft growl. This was different to the other growls, almost communicative. He was so still, so statuesque, that it surprised her that he wasn't meditating or sleeping with his eyes open.

Finally, only three feet from him, she slowed to a stop, trying to discern his intentions from his face, those eyes. She had completely forgotten that only a few feet away lay the shredded bodies of the rogue Shinobi of Ame. Their fate was of their own doing. She cared only for the tortured soul in front of her.

"Gaara," she said in the same low tone. "Gaara I'm here."

His body jerked and she forced herself not to jump back. He was bordering on his control now, and she knew that once again, her voice was working on him. So she started talking again, in the same tone and using his name as she assured him she was not here to harm him. Sakura waited until he growled back at her before moving toward him again. He lowered his transformed body, like a submissive wild cub who was accepting her into its family.

Sakura reached out her arm as she drew up next to him, only inches from his face. She held a trembling hand up to the kanji symbol as she murmured his name, and the outer shell of the partially transformed Shukaku fell away like sand. Like a crushing wave, it collapsed around them, and spilled out over the desert floor. Sweating and panting, the Kazekage re-emerged; exhausted as though he had just run a marathon. Her touch had driven the demon away, and surprised, Gaara looked up at her, now on his knees. His eyes were still the pale yellow and black diamonds, but she knew how to get rid of that.

Sakura knelt down in front of him, cupped his face in her hands, and pulled him to her, kissing him. Almost immediately, Gaara moaned. It was _his_ voice, not the demon's. He was in control again. And it was instinctive, as his hands snaked around her waist and he pulled on her, forcing her to fall forward onto him. She wondered at the strength of his reaction, but then pushed away those thoughts and just held onto him.

His kisses were better when she was accepting him in; he used his tongue to probe her mouth in a tantalising way that surprised her. He was just so lost in the moment and glad that she had been the one to initiate this that Gaara ignored the nagging voice that warned him that at any moment, Shukaku might take over. But the demon was quiet, seemingly silenced by the gentle voice and touch of Sakura, and he wondered suddenly if it had known she could do this.

Gaara took advantage of the absence of that dark voice and just enjoyed the moment – her touch, her smell, and the fact that she wasn't trying to fight him off. He could barely believe that she was here, now, and instigating a make out session of all things! It was an incredible turn on, having her straddling his lap on the desert floor, half laying on him as she pressed into him with surprising vigour. He wondered if maybe they should move this indoors. But Sakura was holding so tightly to him that he wasn't sure she would pull away long enough to go anywhere.

His arms were still around her waist, and she was holding him by both the front of his plain Kazekage uniform and a tight grip on his crimson hair. She pulled his head back and attacked his jaw with her mouth, biting him softly, surprising him; really, this was not the same girl who had tried to knock him out in a collapsing building. He had a hard time trying to match them up in his mind's eye.

Sakura groaned, her kisses moving to his throat, and his hand shot up, interrupting her. She grasped his arm as he held a hand to her throat. He wasn't choking her, but she couldn't move, and she was suddenly terrified of what Gaara was planning on doing. He stared at her, as though he was looking straight through and piercing her very soul. She couldn't look away or close her eyelids, transfixed by those pale, pupil-less eyes.

"Sakura," he whispered lovingly, "I love you."

Her eyes widened in shock as he pulled her back down to him, crashing her lips onto his. She just sat there, in stunned reverie, as he pressed against her. Was it true? Sakura closed her eyes and bit his lip gently before deepening the kiss.

' _Gaara really is in love with me?'_

It had been a long four years since Sasuke had died, since he failed to destroy Konoha. Maybe it really was time for her to move on. And even though she knew Gaara wasn't the only one feeling something here, it still seemed so surreal, that she could have feelings for anyone other than Sasuke Uchiha. She had tried to make things work with Naruto, but she could not love him as he had professed to love her. He was with Hinata now, and she was all alone. But the question still remained: Gaara?

She was mesmerised by his kiss, his scent, and the sensation of his free hand on her body. Her right hand ran downward, along his chest. His left hand remained on her throat. But now, she didn't mind so much. She moaned into his mouth, arching her back as his right hand fell to her side – the contours of his body pressed against her, she couldn't fight the tingling sensations rippling through her.

Suddenly, she felt his sand shift around her and he shunshined them into the Wind Shrine, and onto the bed in that adjoining room. He understood that it wasn't her favourite place, but it was the only shelter within miles and she was beginning to sweat heavily. The shrine was cooler, partially due to the fact that it was mostly dark, but mainly because of the nearby subterranean water source. The lower levels of this place, which were sealed off, led to this water, among other things.

Finding himself flat on his back, Gaara rolled over, pushing Sakura onto her back, which broke the kiss as she twisted her head. She groaned, and pulled his lips back to hers roughly. He steadied himself, with one arm resting on the bed as he ran the other hand along her arm. She shifted her legs, holding his thighs with her knees and he blushed, feeling her pressed up against him. Sakura couldn't help it, she giggled. After a moment, she broke the kiss and stared into those pale eyes of his.

"Are you embarrassed?" She teased.

She had not expected he would respond like this, considering their history, and true enough, there was a hesitant concern on his face. He seemed to want to savour the moment, trying to catch his breath as he licked his lips.

"Gaara, are you okay?"

He shook his head, pressing their foreheads together. He was having trouble breathing. In order for the transformation, Shukaku had taken more out of him than necessary. His chakra reserves were low and he was feeling queasy, regretting using his Shunshin instead of just carrying Sakura into the shrine. He closed his eyes.

She shifted again, uncertain. Was he ill? She lifted her hand to his chest and probed him with her chakra, her eyes widening as she realised he was almost out of chakra. His pulse was unsteady and his blood pressure was low. There was only so much of that she could heal.

The pinkette lifted her hand to his face and pulled him down to kiss her again.

He groaned, gripping her so tightly that it hurt. The sounds emanating from him were his own, not some demon's. She could feel his heart beating through his shirt, and the way he explored her mouth with his tongue was not something he had ever done before today. So Sakura wrenched his head up, pulling on his hair, not enough to rip it out, but with enough tension that his eyes snapped open at the broken kiss.

Those pale eyes often reminded her of the lavender of the Hyuuga, except a light green version. She smiled up at him, releasing his hair, and running her fingers over the kanji. He didn't try to kiss her again, just staring down at her. They both wanted to go further than this, but were holding back. Sakura wasn't ready for that right now. She wrapped her arms around him, just resting her chin on his shoulder. But a few minutes later, remembering the other reason she had sought Gaara out, Sakura pulled away from him and out of his warm embrace.

 

X X X

 

They remained in the same position however, as he stared down at her, the usual stoic expression of his now curious more than anything. She had just interrupted the greatest make out session either of them had _ever_ had. Sakura smiled slightly at his slightly pouting face.

"Gaara, I need to apologise to you."

He didn't shift his expression. "For what? I'm the one that hurt _you_."

She shook her head. "No, you didn't. That was Shukaku; we both know that. You need to stop punishing yourself for what that _thing_ did."

He closed his eyes and she brushed at a loose strand of his hair. He would never have believed that one day she would say that to him. It made him feel so… warm. Gaara had no idea anyone could feel _this_ relieved.

"And I have a confession to make," she said, pushing him slightly to get him to move off of her.

They sat side by side on the edge of the bed before she continued.

"I need to apologise for not telling you sooner. It's my fault things have gotten so out of control."

She held a finger to his mouth as he started to interrupt her.

"Wait, I'm not finished. I know I was angry at you two years ago Gaara, but since then, I _have_ forgiven you, you need to know that."

His eyes widened slightly and she smiled. "I should've told you a long time ago, but I was so messed up, not wanting to face the reality of what had happened. I never told anyone about that day, and I guess I've been bottling it up. If I had just told you that I forgave you, nothing would've happened when I came back to Suna, Shukaku wouldn't have driven you from your home, and my friends wouldn't have been so worried about me that they'd pressure _you_ into speaking with me. And you wouldn't have had to live with all this guilt for so long."

She took a deep breath. "Can you forgive me?"

Gaara groaned. "Sakura, it's not your fault. There's nothing to forgive."

She wanted to kiss him again, but refrained. There was something else she also needed to tell him. It was something that had been bugging her even longer than the two years since that day. She stood up and walked to the door, stopping at the frame and not looking at him as he watched her calmly. It was now or never, she supposed. Ino, Naruto, and Kakashi also knew this secret, but just like two years ago, it should have been _her_ burden to bear and hers alone. She was done putting other people through things because she couldn't cope with the truth. She turned to face Gaara, ignoring her renewed impulse to jump him right then and there.

"I'm an idiot Gaara. When it comes to men, I always seem to make the wrong decisions."

The fury building on her face scared him, but he remained silent. She clenched her fists, the first of many tears now building up inside of her. The emotion poured out of her and she spoke venomously, reminding herself of the way Naruto had spoken to her last night.

"I'm _poison_."

"Why?" Gaara asked, struggling to hide his frustration.

Why would Sakura think she was some kind of a contagion for men? Her tears were flowing freely now, and she did nothing to hide them from him.

" _Why_?" She snapped, startling him. "Because I did it Gaara, _I_ killed Sasuke!"

He blinked heavily, his mind reeling. "But I thought –"

"Naruto covered for me," she said, now ranting. "He told everyone he had done it because he knew I couldn't bare the looks and the shame. I never wanted to harm Sasuke. From the moment I saw him as a child all I wanted was his attention, his love. And even when he defected from Konoha, all I could think about was bringing him back, hoping for the happy ending where he would finally realise he was madly in love with me and forget about gaining power."

She sniffed, wiping at the tears. "I was a fool, and my ignorance and fan girl ways _drove_ him away. I said all the wrong things, couldn't be the team mate he deserved and blubbered like an idiot while begging him to stay."

Sakura looked into Gaara's eyes now, expecting to see the same, indifferent expression he always wore. He was so much like Sasuke in that way – shut off from his emotions and difficult for others to get to know. But he actually looked stunned, his face _showing_ the intensity of what she was feeling. He loved her, and he wanted her; he had already told her this. But she wouldn't let herself hope and dream ever again.

"Then I _killed_ him," she said harshly. "I let him think he was beating me, I _let_ him beat me to an inch from my death. He was so happy, finally being able to kill me, to be rid of me once and for all. And then, when he bent down to whisper something to me, probably intending to gloat before he made the final blow, I forced chakra into my hands. I gouged out his eyes. I destroyed the Sharingan eyes, blinding him permanently."

She sniffed again, new tears stinging her eyes, but no longer flowing.

"Oh, but that wasn't enough. I could _smell_ his blood all over me now, mixed in with mine, and the only thought I had was: ' _I can't do this anymore_ '. Do you know what it's like Gaara, to love someone so much that even when they're trying to kill you, you still want to protect them?"

Gaara nodded softly, but didn't elaborate.

Sakura sighed. "I struck out after blinding him," she said, now sounding calmer. "I dug my chakra scalpel into his heart. He was screaming the entire time, and it felt good to finally shut him up."

She laughed mirthlessly, staring down at her hands now. "How twisted is _that_?"

Gaara was socially inept and didn't quite _get_ the point of lying to make people feel better. But he found himself wanting to lie to her, to tell her _something_ that would bring her out of this darkness. He understood her killing Sasuke; the Uchiha had become a monster. Gaara had called _himself_ that for years, never knowing the light that was underneath it, much stronger than the darkness that was masking it. But for Sasuke, it had turned out that the opposite was true. It was a tragic loss of life, but even with the extinction of the Uchiha clan, and with it the Sharingan kekkei genkai, the world still moved on.

He wracked his brain, trying to think of the best way to say this, without sounding indifferent to the death of Sasuke, but it didn't come. He lowered his head instead, his body suddenly feeling weak as he swallowed heavily at her words. _She_ had killed Sasuke Uchiha, _Naruto_ had taken the blame, and here _he_ was, unable to comfort her. He looked up at her, feeling queasy again as she continued to stare at her hands quietly.

Finally, Gaara stood, walked over to her, reached out, and took her hands, entwining their fingers together. She broke down again, pulling him into a tight embrace. Clearly, sometimes the best thing to say was nothing at all. They just stood there as she let it all out. She didn't want to make the same mistakes with him, even though _that_ had already happened. And here she was again, blubbering like an idiot. Then Sakura realised suddenly that a good amount of her tears had been happy tears.

How had she missed that?

Sakura pulled away and smiled up at the Kazekage. He was looking slightly sickly, so she manoeuvred him back onto the bed. He was too exhausted to return to Suna right now.

Sakura sat down on the bed as Gaara quickly drifted off. He was more fatigued than he had originally let on. She smiled and brushed a strand of hair away from the kanji symbol on his forehead, then kissed the symbol softly. She curled up next to him, her arm flung over his chest as he sighed deeply, in his sleep. But she wasn't tired. This time, she was going to wait for _him_ to wake up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	13. Return To Suna.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To clear a few things up, because I've been asked (and answered in the original chapter 13 on ff.net), here:  
> Sakura's feelings for Gaara have been developing, but it took running into him again for her to begin to realise. It had nothing to do with the rape. Things had already been on the right track, but that *incident* derailed them.  
> Temporarily. For 2 years.  
> Enjoy. ^_^

"I'm scared Gaara," Sakura Haruno admitted shortly after the Kazekage had fallen asleep.

She had never seen him so peaceful, and wondered what Shukaku was doing to make it possible for Gaara to sleep, unhindered by that _thing_. It boggled the mind, everything that had happened to her. She didn't want to think about it, but the thoughts came anyway. How they had gotten here, starting from that first day here, in the Wind Shrine, to their altercation in Suna, and then finally here again. Like a full circle. Did that mean it was all over?

She stroked the side of his face and he moved his head into her hand, subconsciously. She smiled.

"What are we going to do?" She asked him. "They're going to ask us questions I don't want to answer. And Naruto…" She sighed. "He is so annoyed with me right now. Imagine if I told him I loved you, after that argument I had with him. Would he hate me for worrying him like that unnecessarily?"

The Kazekage didn't respond of course, but Sakura didn't care that she sounded like a crazy person, talking to herself; she wasn't really, she was talking to _him_. While trying not to fall asleep, she yawned, realising her body was screaming at her to rest. But she wanted to be conscious when Gaara woke up. She guessed that Ino had woken up by now and was informing everyone about her crazy friend.

Sakura giggled at that. Well, at the crazy part. She was well aware that she was going to have to apologise to Ino when she got back, but there hadn't been any other choice. Gaara wasn't going to come back on his own, Shukaku was probably whispers all sorts into his head, and there was no way anyone in Suna would believe she _suddenly_ knew how to find their Kazekage when they were coming up empty. Well, if she'd had a reasonable excuse, maybe they would have believed her. It was too late to worry about that now.

She closed her eyes for a moment, her eyelids getting heavier and heavier as she pictured the look on Naruto and Ino's faces when she returned to Suna, with Gaara. The whole thing scared the _hell_ out of her.

Sakura woke some time later, realising immediately that she had fallen asleep and silently cursed herself. She had wanted to stay awake. And to make things worse, when she rolled over, Gaara was no longer lying next to her. She sensed him a moment later, in the main room, hovering over the central dais. She rolled into a seated position, stood up, and joined him. He was actually inspecting the stone pedestal in the middle of the dais, running his hands over the surface as though looking for some kind of hidden switch.

"What are you up to now?" She asked cheekily, earning herself a minute smile.

"The entrance to the underground cavern is supposed to be here," he said, raking his pale eyes over the pedestal.

"Really?"

Sakura studied the pedestal. How was it that she had only just noticed the markings on the stone? They looked like some kind of sealing jutsu, but it was incredibly worn, and therefore of an older design. She wouldn't know how to begin to unseal it. The Fuuin Jutsu seemed to intrigue Gaara however, and the pinkette decided to watch _him_ instead. His face was calm, collected, and expressionless, but those eyes seemed to be conveying the curiosity of a child. He glanced at her when he noticed she was staring at him, but he said nothing.

"Have you ever tried to get in there before now?" She asked.

Gaara shook his head. "No."

"So why now?"

He tore his eyes away from the pedestal and stared back at her. "We shouldn't be here."

"It's sacred, right?"

He nodded.

Sakura sighed. "Gaara, before we leave, I wanted to tell you something. I have no idea what _this_ ," she moved her hand to gesture between herself and the Kazekage, "is. I know you love me, I feel it too, but we need to sensible about his. There's no way it can become anything more."

Gaara was disappointed by this; she knew this, even though he gave no outward signs of it. Okay scrap that, it was clear in his eyes, what he was thinking. They had kissed, made out and he'd confessed his feelings, so why wouldn't there be potential for more? Sakura had no idea how she was going to explain to her friends, let alone the Suna council why she had taken off in the middle of the night without telling them the whole truth, but as for Gaara's disappearance, there was a slippery, horny demon inside him, ripe for the blame.

She needed to go back to Konoha and get on with her life. But despite her resolve on this, she found herself inching closer to Gaara, reaching toward him, both of her hands slipping around his waist, her head inclining as she pulled him down into her embrace. The kiss was sweet, but in an effort to keep up with the sudden racing of her heart, Sakura bit him softly, tracing his lips with her tongue before thrusting the muscle into his mouth.

Gaara wasn't expecting this, but was also not surprised by her fervour. She was a treasure chest of delights, from her wandering hands as they gripped his arse, pressing him to her, to her forceful mouth as she attacked his tongue, trying to outdo him. He bit back just as hard, his own hands holding onto her roughly. He gripped the base of her short pink hair, twisting the strands; this made her yelp softly, but she didn't try to pull away. Then he lowered his free hand down to her top, grasped it tightly, then spun her around and pressed the body of Sakura Haruno against the pedestal in the centre of the room. She mewled in appreciation, the sound that emanated from her mouth driving him on.

Sakura lifted her knees, now supported by the stone of the pedestal, continuing to attack Gaara with everything she had. Their physical attraction was never one she could deny. The feel of the Kazekage pressed against her was never something she could ignore. It was her uncertainty over her feelings that had caused her to wait this long. She knew she loved him, then the next moment Sakura was worried that she was just reacting to her _need_ to undress the Kazekage. She was all over the place.

And that speech she had given about not knowing what this really was, about Gaara's obvious feelings, and going about this sensibly, she just wanted to forget all about that. This had to be confusing him, to hear her say that this couldn't be any more than that, then have her jump him the next second. She was confusing _herself_ with all this back and forth. But she couldn't help herself. Sakura pulled on his vest, adding more resonance to the sounds they were both emitting as she felt him swell against her. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and he started to undo her top. The red shirt only had a single zipper at the front, and he slid a hand into the gap he'd created; he squeezed her left breast, aware of the bandage wrapping that bound her chest.

Sakura moaned into his mouth, excited and turned on. She wanted more, she wanted to go all the way, and she couldn't stop herself. It wasn't the smartest idea, sleeping with Gaara in here of all places, but her hormones were screaming at her to do just that. She decided to forget that inhibition that had been telling her not to do this and started to undo the clasps on Gaara's vest. It was a simple vest, over his long maroon shirt jacket and pants, and easily disposed of. But as she pulled away to dispose of her own shirt, Gaara stopped her suddenly, his head tilting slightly. She heard it a moment later and her eyes widened. He nodded his head in the direction of the sound coming from outside the shrine.

"We're not alone."

X X X

It was shortly after news had spread about this recent disappearance that Ino Yamanaka found herself pacing impatiently in front of the door to the home that Temari Sabaku owned. Being the sister of the Kazekage, she was afforded the luxury of one of the newer buildings. That's not to say that people were being bunched into houses while reconstruction efforts had stalled or anything. Given how many people had lost their lives four years ago, and the fact that most buildings had already been rebuilt, there was plenty of room to go around. Ino remembered when some of the hostels that weren't as damaged as private homes were overrun and the owners ordered by the Kazekage not to charge the people forced to live under their roof.

She stopped pacing as Temari opened the door and pulled her friend into her house.

"Careful Temari," Ino said cheekily, although extremely distracted, "someone might think we're having an illicit affair."

Temari gave her a wry smile. "You need to head back to Konoha."

"Is that why you wanted to see me?" Ino groaned. "Sakura's out there somewhere, and I'm not going back without her."

"The council is convinced she just left without you."

Ino swore. "Of course they are. It's the only thing they can think of to explain _her_ disappearance, and they can't even figure out where the _Kazekage_ went."

"This is getting ridiculous," Temari said. "It's weird enough that Gaara disappeared, now _Sakura_ …"

A light bulb seemed to switch on in her head. "Do you think this has something to do with why Sakura's been acting weird?"

Ino huffed. "Probably; the thought has crossed my mind, several times. You don't think they're sleeping together or something?"

Temari made a strangled sound, sort of like a giggle. "Nah…"

Ino narrowed her eyes at her. Sakura had turned down that hunk last night, and she'd definitely been enjoying an x-rated dream when Ino woke up, interrupted in the middle of her own erotic dream. She frowned. Kami, if she was right, it would certainly explain a lot.

"What did the sentinels I sent to you say?" Temari asked, interrupting her friend's thoughts.

"No disturbances," Ino said, "which is hardly surprising. Sakura is a high level genjutsu expert after all."

She bit her bottom lip and Temari narrowed her eyes at her.

"You really _do_ think there's something going on between them, don't you?"

Ino bobbed softly. "Either that or this is the sickest practical joke in history. I better head back and finish packing my things. Ten to one, Shikamaru is ready, but Naruto will need a fire lit under his ass. Thanks for getting the sentinels to come to me."

"Don't mention it; and Ino? I'm heading to the council chambers in a bit, meet me outside there with Shikamaru and Naruto, okay?"

Ino nodded and rushed out of her house, hurrying back to the apartment building where V.I.P visitors were always housed. She realised almost immediately that Shikamaru and Naruto were no longer in their room. She mumbled to herself, swearing under her breath. She packed up her stuff and headed to the Kazekage mansion, like she'd promised Temari, hoping to also find Shikamaru and Naruto here. The council were aware of this latest development, and just as surprised as the leaf ninja that one of them had also left in the middle of the night, like their Kazekage. She wondered if they were suspicious of this. As a ruling body, they were in the perfect position to suspect everyone around them. But Gaara had handpicked the new council, so surely that meant they were as open and intelligent as he was, right?

Ino ran into toward Kazekage building and almost slammed into Matsuri just outside the double doors leading inside. The brunette girl looked downtrodden, just like everyone else since the Kazekage disappeared, but this time, there was a small indication that she was also annoyed. The blonde mumbled a hasty apology and sidestepped to squeeze past her; she was standing in the way. But Ino was stopped in her tracks by the sound of the Chunin's angry voice.

"What is Sakura up to?"

Ino turned back to face her, frowning. Just who did this girl think she was talking about? The tone in her voice was one normally reserved for an enemy, or a love rival. Ino had no idea how Matsuri could think that Sakura fell into either of those categories. Ino forced herself to calm down before responding. The last thing she needed right now was to get into an argument, when she'd rather be two storeys up, and finding out what was going on with the council instead.

"What are you talking about?" The blonde said, distracted.

"I mean, what is Sakura up to, running away like that? What is she planning?"

"You're not making any sense Matsuri," Ino said, noting the rise in colour on the Chunin's face warily. This girl was freaking her out.

"I'm making perfect sense. Sakura's run off to find Lord Gaara, hasn't she? If she touches him, I swear –"

"Now listen here," Ino snapped, no longer caring if she had to tackle this _bitch_. "What the _hell_ are you implying?"

Matsuri balked at the blonde's tone, but a rise in the colour of her cheeks showed Ino that this girl wasn't joking. She sounded like some scorned lover, or a stalker fan girl who was ready to _devour_ the competition. Ino growled softly to emphasize her anger and the younger woman left in a huff.

' _Really, what the fuck was_ _that_ _all about?_ _Maybe it wasn't Sakura that Gaara was sleeping with after all.'_

No, Ino shook her head. She was quite certain that the brunette was a stalker, _not_ a lover. As someone who had personally _been_ both at more than one stage in her life, Ino knew the difference. Who had she stalked? Shikamaru Nara of course, but that was a whole other _issue_.

This sudden shift in Matsuri's demeanour scared Ino. Both frustrated and pissed off however, she entered the Kazekage mansion and made her way to the council room. Naruto Uzumaki and Shikamaru Nara were waiting outside the double doors for her.

"You look like you're ready to kill someone," Kankuro noted, coming up behind Shikamaru, seemingly out of nowhere.

Ino just shrugged Matsuri's actions away, though slightly regretful not to bitch about her. She had a feeling that might bite her on the butt one day.

"No more than usual," she said, and the sand sibling smirked softly.

"Yeah, leaf Kunoichi seem to be like that," he said.

She clenched her fists. "Yeah? Well you're the one wearing makeup !"

He raised his eyebrows at her. "So are you."

"That doesn't help your case," Shikamaru stated. "Is the council still wanting to talk to us?"

Kankuro sighed, and nodded to him. "Yeah, they have some ridiculous new theory."

Naruto snorted. "Where did Gaara pick these idiots from? They're as bad as the last lot."

Kankuro lowered his voice. "Not really."

The blonde Shinobi huffed at him, and then knocked on the council doors. Bade to enter, all four ninja strode into the room. The council members looked as annoyed at them as they felt. Ino decided to say something before Naruto lost his cool.

"We're not leaving without Sakura. And _no_ ," she added forcefully as they moved to interrupt her, while retaining her diplomatic status, "she wouldn't just up and return to Konoha without us."

Kankuro groaned softly, his next words audible only by the three leaf ninja standing around him.

" _Women_."

X X X

"The Ame rogues?" Sakura asked, and Gaara nodded his head.

The fixed their clothes hastily and she pulled out her kunai as he gathered his sand. He had removed his gourd, the ever present fixture on his back that she often forgot he still carried along with him. He had almost left Suna without it, as it was acting without his thoughts more often than not lately. He'd felt it a hindrance as he'd shunshined Sakura and himself into the Wind Shrine, so it was left to gather sand on its own. But now he needed it.

' _Shunshin.'_

That gave him an idea. But first, they needed to deal with these rogues, and he had no intention of transforming. These fiends were getting more and more reckless, and not for the first time, the Kazekage wondered what they were _really_ after.

"I'm going to transport us outside the shrine," he whispered to Sakura. "When this happens, use your chakra fist to break up the ground and I'll start a sandstorm to cover our escape."

"We're running away?" This didn't sit right with her.

"Did I miss something Sakura?" He asked, an uncharacteristic cheek to his voice. "Are you the new Kazekage?"

She realised he was worried about the blood lust so soon after being able to silence Shukaku, and the fact that he wasn't yet fully recovered, so she bit back her complaint and chuckled.

"No sir."

In the next moment, his sand was swirling around her body and it only took a second for her eyes to register both the stretch of desert around them, and the two dozen Amegakure rogues.

' _What the fuck?'_

They were relentless; what were they really after? Sakura glanced at Gaara, thinking about Shukaku and he nudged her, reminding her about her chakra fist. The pinkette complied, slamming her fist into the ground. She had learnt over the years how to better direct the path of destruction, and was able to, as a result, not hit the Wind Shrine with her assault. The earth trembled beneath them, the surface tearing apart as Gaara's sandstorm kicked up. She supposed it was okay if they got back to Suna without taking down _these_ ones.

' _Next time, I promise you guys are_ _dead_ _.'_

Gaara gripped her hand and they ran. They ran for what seemed like forever, and faster than she had run to get to the shrine. But the closer they got to Suna the more the two ninja fretted over what was awaiting them. The towering walls of the village hidden in the sand approached them, but before the sentinels could spot them, Gaara stopped in his tracks, pulling Sakura into his chest. He had no idea if this would work, but teleporting to a place within the walls that he was familiar with from outside the village was the only way he could think of getting in without being noticed. He hoped his aim was right, but was surprised when his plan to sneak back in did not go over as easily as how he had initially snuck out.

Gaara used his sand Shunshin to teleport them straight into the village hidden in the sand; they appeared out of nowhere, holding each other, and standing directly in front of the Suna council.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	14. The Hokage's Order.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

It was stunned reverie all around. Nobody said anything for a full ten seconds. Shocked by his mistake, Gaara didn't pull away from Sakura. He was trying to formulate the best excuse in his head, how it was Shukaku's fault, how he had to hold onto Sakura in order to teleport them _both_ , and whoops, sorry, didn't mean to land right in the middle of the council room. But he couldn't speak, unable to form the thoughts properly, let alone voice them. Sakura too, seemed stunned, but broke away from the Kazekage as Naruto Uzumaki's voice rang out.

"What the _fuck_ are you two doing?"

Sakura looked around, taking in her new surroundings. Ino Yamanaka, Shikamaru Nara, and Naruto stood on one side of the room, with Kankuro less than a foot away, while every single council member sat around the long table, staring incredulously at _her_. They didn't even react to Naruto's profanity. The blonde leaf Shinobi wasn't glaring at his best friend, but a slight twitching in his left eye left no room for doubt as to what he was thinking. Sakura guessed it sounded something like what he had already said, except with more cussing.

"Lord Kazekage…"

One of the council members said finally, drawing the attention away from Sakura. Gaara did _not_ like the way they were looking at him. He kept his eyes away from Sakura however, and braced himself as Kankuro strode over to him, looking annoyed.

"If you weren't the Kazekage," he said deeply, "I'd _deck_ you."

Instead, he settled for hugging him, not surprised when his little brother didn't hug him back. Gaara was now looking at Naruto. The two jinchuriki stared impassively at each other, which was what had calmed Naruto down. They had a bond that went unspoken, and a shared pain, but never in a million years would Naruto have imagined that he would see Sakura in Gaara's arms. The blonde wasn't stupid, he had seen the way they'd held each other; it wasn't meaningless, the way the Kazekage's arms had held her close to him. And it made Naruto wonder what was going on between them. Did they have feelings for each other? He couldn't fathom it, and not just because it had snuck up on him, but also because of his last conversation with the pinkette. If she liked the Kazekage, why had she seemingly given up, just to go charging off in the middle of the night to find him all on her own?

It made no sense to him.

But before Naruto could ask them, Gaara realised what he was going to say, and spoke first. Thankfully, Kankuro got the hint and broke the hug.

"I apologise for my absence and I will explain what happened, but first –"

The doors slammed open and Temari stormed in, interrupting Gaara. Just like Kankuro, she embraced Gaara, though she didn't hesitate to hug him tighter than necessary and wasn't aware of what had just transpired. She'd sensed her baby brother's chakra and come running over as quickly as she could. She noted Sakura a moment later and pulled her into the hug. Uncomfortable, Gaara pried his sister's fingers loose, brushing Sakura's arm as he did so. For a moment, their eyes locked and the Kazekage couldn't pull away from those emerald orbs. Everyone in the room watched them until Sakura blinked heavily and turned her head away.

Shikamaru was getting annoyed with the touchy, feely aspect of this. But more than anything, he just wanted to shift the direction of this "reunion".

"The Hokage has ordered us back to Konoha," he said, making Sakura tremble slightly. "And now that you're back Sakura, we should leave."

Ino nodded, also grateful for the change in conversation. She grabbed Sakura's hand and propelled her along with her as she ran from the room. Temari chuckled, and the lazy Jounin frowned at her.

"What?" He asked.

She smiled. In the absence of the leaf ninja, the council had decided to send her back with them. They wanted a Suna ninja to brief the Hokage about the Ame rogues. She hadn't wanted to go, knowing that Gaara was still missing, but now that he was back, she no longer had an excuse. Temari decided to make him pay for making her worry when she returned.

"Oh nothing," she winked at Shikamaru, "just that I'm going back with you."

X X X

Sakura couldn't say goodbye to Gaara the way she wanted to, and her fury at her every move being scrutinised not only by her friends, but the council, drove her to ignore them all. She knew she had to go back to Konoha, she knew it was a direct order from her Hokage, and she _knew_ that there was no reasonable excuse to hang around Suna. Oh, except for the fact that she _needed_ some time alone with the Kazekage. They needed to talk, but were not being afforded the privacy that this would require. And to top it all off, the manner in which Sakura and Gaara had returned to Suna was spreading like wildfire. A very pissed off Matsuri hovered around, shooting death glares at Sakura, and the pinkette decided it would be best to leave after all, and let things calm down.

' _Please calm down.'_

So, during the entire trip back, Sakura ignored Naruto's blatant stares. He had tried to get her to talk, but was frustrated by her lack of concern for his curiosity. Ino's furtive glances, coupled with the way Temari kept biting her bottom lip and casting worried glances at her made it more difficult for Sakura to concentrate on what she was doing, and she almost tripped several times. Thankfully, Shikamaru did not seem remotely interested in questioning her. But that was just _him_. She knew her sudden appearance in the arms of the Kazekage had piqued his curiosity as well, but he was too lazy to bother asking her about it. She didn't want to get into a conversation about what had happened while they travelled home.

' _Home.'_

The thought that she would soon be greeted with the comfort of her own bed brought a slight smile to her face, even if it was crushed a moment later when she reminded herself that she was leaving Gaara behind. Not once did anyone in Suna say "thank you for bringing our Kazekage back" while she'd readied herself for a three day trip back to Konoha (including having a nurse see to her wounds). No, they were all still wondering how a leaf ninja had found him, and _why_ she had. The expression on Gaara's face before Sakura had left with the group told her he was going to blame not only Shukaku, but himself, but she wondered if he'd really thought that through. She had promised herself to stop letting others take the blame for her actions, but here she was again, running away while someone else was raked over the coals. She didn't know how to stop this from happening again.

The group of four leaf ninja and one sand Kunoichi hit the forest and were keeping their senses on alert for any disturbances. But the Ame rogues had not attacked, and they saw no signs of the masked ninja from the village hidden in the rain. It was a grace from Kami, they decided and continued their journey unhindered. Sakura's days were spent in silence, her nights disturbed by dreams similar to the strange ones she'd had the last time she passed through this way – the Ame rogues attacking her in a joint effort with sand ninja.

Sakura was glad when she finally spotted the gates to Konoha. It was time to report to the Hokage.

X X X

"I don't get it," Naruto said, pointing his finger at Sakura. "One minute you're agreeing with the Suna council that there's nothing to be done to find Gaara, and ignoring me when I want to continue the search, and then the next you're knocking Ino unconscious and running off to find him. What gives?"

"It is unusual behaviour," Kakashi told her, "even for you."

Temari stood quietly, on the other side of Naruto, just as curious about the question. She was eternally grateful to Sakura for bringing her brother back and saving him, but was confused that the pinkette had done this all by herself. What had possessed the girl to do this? Next to her, Shikamaru looked like he would rather be anywhere but here, but he was a witness to the events that unfolded in the council room back in Suna, and had since decided that he too needed to know what was going on. It was troublesome, but Sakura was his friend as well. Still, the lazy cloud watcher had nothing to say, so opted to stay silent.

Sakura glanced at Ino. Of course, _she_ had refused to be left out of this discussion. The only people in the room were Kakashi, Naruto, Ino, Shikamaru, Temari, and Sakura. The pinkette didn't want to talk about what had been bothering her. She didn't want to put into words how Gaara had taken advantage of her, and how she had realised she was in love with him. It all sounded so… twisted. They wouldn't believe her anyway.

Kakashi sighed when she didn't answer Naruto. He didn't want to order her to do this, but as the Hokage, he had little choice. He cleared his throat and Sakura looked up at him. Her eyes widened at the pained look on his face, realising what was coming.

"Sakura," he said. "I'm sorry, but I have to order you to tell us. Everyone who cares about you has been worried about your well being and it is time that you tell us whatever you've been hiding. I was willing to let it go, but now it's affected your missions, and as Hokage, I can't allow that."

He took a deep breath. "So as Hokage, I order you to tell me what has been bothering you."

Sakura glanced at her waiting friends. "Hokage-sama, can I tell you alone?"

He sighed deeper this time and Naruto, looking mutinous, growled. Kakashi nodded his head.

"Naruto, Shikamaru, Temari, and Ino: will you please wait outside?"

"Of course, Hokage-sama," Shikamaru said slowly and cocked his head at Temari, who grabbed Naruto by the ear to drag him along.

Ino was also furious, but hid it better. She still wanted to take a bite out of Sakura for knocking her out, and now her best friend wouldn't even tell her _why_. But she bowed to Kakashi anyway.

"We will make sure Naruto stays out of earshot."

She glanced at Sakura and then closed the door behind her. Sakura stepped closer when her former Sensei motioned her to and inhaled deeply.

"Thank you Hokage –"

"Sakura," he interrupted soothingly. "There is no need to be so formal. Please, just tell me what is bothering you."

She nodded her head. "It was two years ago," she said, knowing he knew this, "when my squad was attacked by those rogues."

He nodded when she paused. Really, that part was obvious. She shifted slightly, not sure how to put this into words.

"I lied about what happened," she said, earning a lift of the Hokage's single eyebrow in interest. "Gaara didn't find me out in the desert after the rogues had disappeared."

She swallowed heavily, lowering her eyes. Kakashi was stunned. This meant that the Kazekage had lied as well. He would never have thought for a moment that Gaara would do that. So, now more than ever, his curiosity was piqued. Why would the Kazekage lie about _that_? He waited patiently for Sakura to continue, but had to clear his throat to get her talking again.

"I was badly hurt, and I found the Wind Shrine. That's a sacred shrine for the people of the wind, it's –"

"I'm aware," Kakashi said, prompting her gently.

She nodded. "Gaara was alone in there when I arrived. He uh…"

She bit her bottom lip. Kakashi sat up straight, a part of him now fearful about what she was about to say. None of this showed on his face however and he nodded to her as she looked up at him for reassurance. Sakura felt like crying, but even if she wanted them to, the tears wouldn't come. She held her hands to her stomach protectively, reminding herself that she wanted to move past this, and this was just another step toward that goal.

"The Kazekage had been meditating to better control Shukaku. I didn't know this. He uh…" She took a deep breath. "He raped me."

' _Kami, that was hard to say.'_

She needed to explain to Kakashi that it wasn't Gaara's fault, that Shukaku had taken advantage of the situation and used his feelings for her to manipulate and control the Kazekage. Kakashi was stunned beyond belief. She would never have believed it possible for him to look _that_ shocked. He was always calm, or smiling while proclaiming his intentions to protect his comrades, and now his village as Hokage. He was _never_ so shocked that he looked like he might fall over. It was lucky he was already sitting down.

"The Kazekage," he drawled, " _raped_ you. Did I hear you right, Sakura?"

She nodded. The look on his face was still of shock, but a strange twinge of his good eye had her worried. So she rambled, telling Kakashi that it wasn't Gaara's fault, and _yes_ , she had been mad at him for a long time and a part of her probably still was, but she had also forgiven him. She rambled so much that Kakashi held up his hand to stop her and when she continued, he interrupted.

" _Sakura_ ," he said forcibly and she obediently fell silent. "I understand what you've said. But you can't just ignore what he did. Obviously, you haven't dealt with it and it's affecting you. No," he snapped softly when she looked ready to argue the point, "you _haven't_ spoken to anyone about it, so you're not dealing with it. And as for the Kazekage –"

Sakura trembled, terrified by those five words. "Please don't do anything to him."

He raised an eyebrow at her, but was only mildly surprised. A lot of rape victims blamed themselves or tried to avoid facing what had happened. As Hokage, he'd had to witness more of the fallout from violent events than he'd realised existed, even during all his years in the Anbu black ops. But sometimes, there were incidents that left him completely shocked at human behaviour. He understood that Sakura had decided not to blame Gaara, but by her own words, he had succeeded once, and then tried again. Kakashi needed to speak with the Kazekage and get _his_ side of this. Regardless of what Sakura claimed, he couldn't just ignore this.

And that was what Sakura was afraid of.

Still, the silver haired Shinobi was not ignoring the influence Shukaku clearly had over its host. That was definitely going to be taken into account, and Kakashi also had no intention of starting an inter-village incident. Their alliance was too important. He hoped this could be settled behind closed doors. There was no need for people to know what had happened. He listed the ways of going about this in his head, finally coming to a conclusion. He would meet with Gaara in person, either here in Konoha or in Suna. With the problems with the Amegakure rogues increasing, another place would be too dangerous for two Kages to meet at the same time.

Kakashi made a mental note to send a carrier bird to Gaara, one that only the Kazekage could open and read, to propose this. He didn't want to bring any undue stress to Sakura, no more than she had already been through, so he saw no reason to mention all of this to her. He sighed heavily, not relishing the tasks she had given him. And there was still the issue of Naruto, Ino, Shikamaru, and Temari, who had all clearly wanted in on this secret as well.

"Do you want to tell Naruto…" Kakashi didn't know how to finish that sentence.

Sakura sighed. "No I don't, but I'm going to have to aren't I? He's not going to let this slide anymore. Not that I blame him, with everything that happened."

"Yes," Kakashi mused. "You arrived in the council room in the arms of the Kazekage."

He smiled, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. "I wish I'd seen _that_."

Sakura laughed softly. "I'm sure you would, you _pervert_."

Kakashi chuckled. "Oh, so there was groping, was there?"

She blushed. "N-no!"

He was teasing her, they both knew it, but at least it lightened her mood. She was grateful to her ex-Sensei for that. Always, he knew how to make her feel better. That used to be Naruto's job, but now that she thought about it, they _both_ knew her well enough to bring a real smile to her face when she wasn't feeling it. Ino did this as well, but there was something different about her laughter when Kakashi poked fun at her. It made her miss the days of both Team Kakashi and Team Seven. It also made her wonder what Sai and Yamato were doing right now. They hardly spoke anymore, as those two were on an Anbu squad together and rarely in the village for more than forty-eight hours at a time, at least as far as Sakura knew. She used to speak to Sai about their past days on Team Kakashi a lot; it seemed a lifetime ago now.

Sakura crossed her arms over her chest. She didn't want to say the words again, especially not to Naruto, dreading the look on his face, not to mention the inevitable profanities when he realised what had happened. But what other choice did she have? Kakashi, sensing her thoughts, gave her an out.

"I could tell him for you."

She shook her head. "No, really, I can't ask you to do that."

"You didn't ask me Sakura, I offered. It's not a pleasant thought, but –"

"I've done enough of letting other people take the blame for what I did," she said sourly. "Naruto's confession about Sasuke was bad enough. I shouldn't have let him do that. And now Gaara…"

Kakashi raised his eyebrow at her. "What do you mean?"

"He's probably already told his council how I wasn't to blame for anything, and how my disappearing in the middle of the night was _his_ fault and not mine: not that any excuse would be adequate enough for _them_."

"I'll tell Naruto and the others," Kakashi said, raising his hand to silence her as she opened her mouth to complain. "I'm not taking any blame for you Sakura, just relaying what you've already told me. It's not the same thing, and I believe you would do the same for me."

She nodded her head. Yes, she would do that and more. Her friends were more precious to her than her own life. He knew this, which was why he felt comfortable doing this for her.

"Get out of here," he said gently. "We can talk again later. Oh, and take the window exit. It seems Naruto's getting restless again, and he's headed back this way right now."

Sakura nodded. "Alright, but I'm making this up to you."

Kakashi smiled as she moved to the window. "Buy me the special compilation edition of the top Icha Icha novels and we'll call it even."

The stories were as popular as ever, with this new edition being in honour of Jiraiya's death. Supposedly, there were additions that the Sannin had originally written that weren't in the originals. Sakura rolled her eyes at Kakashi, promised to buy the compilation for him, and left his office via the open window.

A moment later, the Hokage had company, in the form of Naruto, Temari, Ino, and Shikamaru.

"Sorry Hokage-sama," Ino said. "We tried to stop him."

"It's okay Ino," Kakashi said. "Come in."

Naruto glanced around the room and let out a distinctly annoyed whine that gave credit to his knucklehead nickname.

"What?" He wailed, balling his fists. "She got away!"

Sakura was indeed already out of the window and who knew how many rooftops away by now.

"Kakashi!"

The blonde knucklehead called the Hokage by his given name these days when he was annoyed with him. Kakashi supposed it was okay, considering what Naruto had called the previous two Hokages when riled up like this. The silver haired ninja sighed.

"Yes, she's gone Naruto. But she's given me permission to recount to you what she just told me, so shut up and behave or I won't tell you."

Naruto lost his fury, both Temari and Ino stood to attention, and Shikamaru raised his eyebrows, clearly intrigued. It seemed all four of them were equally interested to know what had happened. Kakashi wanted nothing more than to pretend he had not heard what he had just heard out of Sakura's mouth, but in respect for the troubled Kunoichi he kept his promise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	15. Longing.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

"Naruto, slow _down_!" Ino Yamanaka called, chasing down the knucklehead as they left the Hokage's office.

She struggled to keep up with Naruto Uzumaki, as he jumped from rooftop to rooftop, and made straight for the apartment that Sakura had started renting about four years ago. She and Naruto had never lived together, but during the time they'd been dating, they had spent a lot of time at each other's places. Ino had not however, been surprised by the amicable split. She knew her friends better than they knew themselves, it would seem. And of course, a month later, Naruto had _suddenly_ realised he had feelings for Hinata. Ino believed he knew before that, but was just too much of a knucklehead to see it.

"Wait!"

She called out again, and they both landed in front of Sakura's apartment door. The knucklehead hammered on the door, not thinking as he called out Sakura's name. Ino couldn't sense the pinkette's chakra, and told Naruto this. He was scaring her, just a little, having reacted so strongly to the new that the Kazekage had _raped_ Sakura. He was hurt that she had not told him, this Ino thought was obvious, by the look on his face. But the blonde Kunoichi understood why Sakura hadn't said anything about it. Sure, she felt annoyed, even more since Sakura had knocked her out to go looking for said rapist, but running after Sakura and yelling at the top of his lungs was not going to get Naruto what he wanted.

Sakura knew very well how to hide from them both.

Ino decided Sakura was probably at the hospital or the training grounds, or somewhere secluded, working out her issues, but didn't tell Naruto this. There was no need to add fuel to the fire and let him catch up with her while he was like this. He needed to calm down. Sakura was the first person she could think of that he would go to; if it hadn't been her that had made him angry in the first place of course. The other person was Hinata Hyuuga. Okay, his wife should've been the first person that occurred to Ino.

"If she's in there," Naruto said, sounding calmer than he looked, "then she's suppressing her chakra, Ino."

"And if she really _is_ avoiding you Naruto, do you really think she'd go to the first place you'd think to look for her?"

He stopped hammering on Sakura's door. "You're right."

"What are you doing?" She stopped him as he started to open the door.

"I'm going to wait for her. She has to come back some time."

"No you are _not_!" Ino snapped. "You can't just go into a woman's apartment unannounced."

"I've done it before."

"When you were _dating_ , Naruto, but you aren't anymore."

He growled as a door opened several feet away. It was one of Sakura's neighbours.

"What the _hell_?" The irate woman said. "Go bang on someone else's door!"

"Gomen." Ino bowed apologetically. "Come on Naruto."

She grabbed him by the ear and dragged him out of the complex, belting him over the head when he started whining loudly. Sakura used to keep him in line, and in a soft spoken way, Hinata did that now. But he _needed_ sense knocked into him every now and then. So much had changed in Sakura since two years ago, and Ino felt a rush of anger toward the Kazekage for this. Still, Kakashi had said it wasn't his fault.

' _The Kazekage was under the influence of Shukaku,'_ he had said. _'Sakura believes it wasn't his fault and has since forgiven him. And none of what I have just told you can leave this room. So do not go having an argument with Sakura in public; that means you too Naruto.'_

But to be fair, Sakura had had two years to learn to forgive him, and Ino had only just found out what he had done. So in her mind, she was allowed to be angry with him. She stopped once they'd cleared the apartment blocks, and Naruto turned on her.

"Save it knucklehead," she interrupted him before he could start on her. "Go spend time with your wife will you. I'll go look for Sakura. _Do_ it," she ordered, when he tried to argue.

Naruto sighed. He needed to calm down of course, and Hinata was the perfect person to help him do just that. He grinned wickedly, surprising Ino.

"Oh okay," he said. "I'm sure Hinata-chan is up to the task." He winked at her and took off.

Ino chuckled. Yeah, the idiot was going to _relax_ alright. She sighed, trying to think of the first place she should start looking for Sakura. The hospital, the training grounds, the creek just before the Nara forest where she and Ino had promised each other years ago that they would do whatever they could to help each other get laid. Ino giggled softly again. Those were the days.

She turned to go search the hospital first, and then spotted Shikamaru and Temari walking together. Ino had stalked him once before, with disastrous results. She'd since been sworn to secrecy upon discovering that at the time, he had been seeing the sand Kunoichi, but they weren't together anymore. Shikamaru's parents wanted him to spend more time with Ino, but he clearly didn't want to. Ino still had some feelings for him, but respected that he didn't see her that way.

And on that note, she shivered involuntarily, remembering her encounter with that Suna Chunin, Matsuri. Now _that_ was a girl with issues.

X X X

Shikamaru Nara was always being put in this position. While he outwardly complained and gave one of his typical "it's a drag" speeches (speeches for him were simple words, not drabble), he actually enjoying walking through Konoha with Temari Sabaku. Her mere presence made him feel more at ease. It had been two years since she'd broken off their secret liaisons, eventually deciding it was best for them to go back to being friends, due to living in different villages and everything, and his folks hammering him about spending more time with Ino Yamanaka. But Shikaku and Yoshino Nara were not aware of Ino's _liaisons_.

The girl was worse than a horny Kakashi surrounded by beautiful, half naked women.

He sighed. And of course, Sakura Haruno entered his thoughts. She had been so strange for so long, and now all the pieces were clear in Shikamaru's head. The Kazekage had _raped_ her two years ago. Just thinking this made him squirm. It didn't seem real; Gaara was a quiet, considerate character who only had other people's best interest at heart. But then Kakashi had said it was Shukaku's influence. What did that even mean? Had he been possessed? Shikamaru didn't know a sealed demon could possess its vessel without transforming, and Kakashi had specifically said it had _not_ transformed his body.

At least, that was the impression he'd gotten from Sakura, apparently.

So, maybe there was something wrong with the seal that was letting the demon slip out. Shikamaru had said this to the Hokage, and received one of those expressions that others gave him when they were noting he had intelligence.

' _Yeah yeah.'_

If he'd _really_ been smart, he would have picked up on something from Gaara during their stay in Suna, and not just from Sakura. He yawned, realising he hadn't rested for awhile, and sighed, glancing at the Kunoichi walking alongside him. Kakashi had asked him to escort her to the V.I.P apartment that was always set up for her, as the official Suna representative. Shikamaru was _always_ escorting her. Didn't the Hokage realise the predicament he was putting him in? It was difficult for him to be around her, even though he enjoyed it, remembering how she had insisted they stop seeing each other.

Even after two years, Shikamaru missed Temari, but would never admit this to her. But right at this moment, he was only concerned by her silence. Normally, the quiet between them was almost comfortable, as they would be off in their own worlds, but very aware of who they were walking next to. This time however, she seemed to not notice him at all. This terrified him, but he had no idea what to say to her. Was she angry with him? Suddenly, Temari stopped walking and stared up and at the Hokage Building before moving her gaze to the curious cloud watcher.

"I need to go back to Suna," she said softly. "There's something I need to know…"

She let that trail off, staring into his eyes. He understood: she wanted to talk to Gaara. Temari wished he would say something. She missed their talks, realising that by ending their relationship, she had done more than just stop sleeping with him every time she came to Konoha. The spark they had had before their relationship, the one that had led them down that path, had not gone away. But it now left her feeling hollow, because she no longer acted on that impulse and had to repeatedly remind herself they were no longer a couple.

It made her think of Gaara and Sakura, wondering what it was like for them. She hated the thought that he had _raped_ the pinkette, knowing her brother would never do that, to _anyone_. She didn't want to accept it as truth, but the Hokage had specifically told her, Shikamaru, Naruto, and Ino that it was Shukaku, and not Gaara. What did that even mean? Had the demon taken Gaara over, and then just decided to take advantage of the leaf Kunoichi? While she trusted that Sakura would not lie about this, she needed to hear it from Gaara's perspective as well. He was her brother, her Kazekage, and the first person she trusted back when she couldn't keep her feelings for Shikamaru a secret any longer. He had advocated her secret liaison back then, telling her to jump at any and every chance she could to be happy.

She hadn't even told Kankuro about it, knowing he would scrutinise Shikamaru and inadvertently give away what was going on. Temari loved both of her brothers, but really only went to Gaara with any problems, other than her girlfriends of course. No-one who had known about the leaf Jounin had tried to convince her to stop seeing him, and she had been so happy every time she came to Konoha.

' _So why did I break it off?'_

Temari sighed, and locked her arms with Shikamaru, startling him. She giggled.

"Come on lazy ass. I need to go back see the Hokage again, and you're escorting me."

X X X

The Kazekage inwardly winced at the screaming. This was not his favourite past time, watching Baki work. The older man had been interrogating the Amegakure rogue that the joint leaf and sand teams had captured, and for days now, the Ame Jounin said and did nothing except scream. Gaara wondered how much longer the man would last. A strong person could resist torture, but not forever. Still, nothing he said was to be taken lightly; after all, once this man _did_ break, it could just be the torture talking. That was why they had an Intelligence Department, separate from the interrogations, where the Shinobi mind could be picked apart from the inside. Konoha had the best specialist in this area, Inoichi Yamanaka, but with Baki's prodding, the Kazekage had agreed to let him do this interrogation his way.

Gaara had been welcomed back with open arms after his little disappearing act, and after a few ranting disagreements were thrown his way, but then he explained about Shukaku's influence. The council was understandably concerned, and ordered Hana Kudamono to not only step up the consistency of his treatments, but also to personally check in on him every few hours to make sure he was still _him_. It made him wonder if they intended to replace him, or had decided not to trust him anymore. The old council would have called for his abdication immediately. But this new one, which he had handpicked, was slightly unpredictable. They didn't seem like they would turn on him, but at the same time, some members gave him looks that reminded him of the older council.

They were adamant about Hana though, and if he hadn't known for sure the council were worried about him, as well as what he might do next, he'd think they were subtly trying to fix him up with her. Hana was pretty, sweet and caring, but she was no Sakura Haruno.

' _Sakura…'_

He missed her. He missed the way she looked at him just before she kissed him, the way her hands trembled when she touched the kanji on his forehead, and the way her eyes lit up when he told her he loved her. He missed everything about her. And not for the first time, he wished she could come back and stay.

Gaara glanced at Baki through the one-way mirror as he observed the interrogation specialist, and Baki asked the Ame rogue another question. The council had questioned him about Sakura, and not knowing what else to say, he just blamed himself. Sure, she had been foolhardy, heading out into the desert all alone, but if they wanted to blame anyone, then he would have them blame _him_. After Sakura's confession about Sasuke Uchiha, Gaara knew she would hate to think that he'd let the council blame him for her actions, but he didn't regret it. Where would he be right now if she hadn't come looking for him?

As far as he was concerned, this was a more than a fair exchange for what she had done for _him_.

"What are you people after?" Baki yelled, though Gaara knew he was not feeling as frustrated as he sounded.

This went on for awhile longer and the Kazekage found himself admiring the resistance this rogue was putting up. But no-one lasted forever, and some time later, as Gaara was considering leaving Baki to it once more, the rogue started to respond to the questioning torturer.

"The Kazekage," the Ame coughed out, now staring at the one-way mirror as though he could see the Gaara through it. "We want his power."

' _Shukaku,'_ Gaara thought bitterly. _'Must my worth always be measured by the presence of that monster?'_

Did this mean that, given the chance, these rogues would go after Naruto as well? Hadn't they suffered enough over the years? Both Gaara and Naruto had been attacked by Akatsuki, and almost kidnapped. Deidara had died trying to capture the Kazekage, while the future Hokage (yeah, Gaara believed it would happen) had been subdued by Pein, and later pursued by Madara. It was the end of their problems when the Akatsuki were all wiped out, or so they had thought.

It was foolish really, to think the Akatsuki were the only organisation that would jump at the chance of gaining more power – stupid even. Baki pulled out a kunai and made the man scream again. He was furious now, and Gaara knew what he was going to ask next, before he even said it.

"Is it our Kazekage or the bijuu you're _really_ after?"

The man did not respond and Gaara was left feeling frustrated, annoyed, and confused. What the _hell_ was going on? Baki worked on the man again, trying to push out the words, the truth. The man had so many wounds, he probably thought he was about to die anyway. But Gaara fully intended on having a medic patch him up so Baki could go at it again, if he didn't spit out what they needed to know. It was unattractive, but it had to be done.

' _The price of leadership.'_

"Neither." the man said hoarsely, a good ten minutes later. "We don't want the vessel or the demon. We just want the chakra, even suppressed by the vessel, it is insurmountable; they _both_ are."

' _Both.'_

So Naruto _was_ a target as well. Gaara clenched his fists softly, unclenching them as Baki knocked the Ame rogue unconscious and glanced toward the one-way mirror, knowing his Kazekage had heard every word. Gaara ran it all over in his head. The council had long since believed that the rogues who had attacked Sakura's team of Anbu two years ago had been working for or with Amegakure, despite the lack of insignias or headbands, but it could never be proven. But if it _was_ true, then Ame was indirectly responsible for what had happened between him and Sakura in the Wind Shrine.

And the loss of two members of her team. After bringing Sakura to Suna after the attack on her, Gaara had gone with the obvious assumption that she wouldn't have been alone. So he used his sand to comb the desert and quickly found the Anbu called Tonetsu, with injuries, but nothing the Suna medics couldn't handle. It had taken him several days to find the body of a woman, later identified as Kima. The broken body of the last Anbu was nearby. His code name had been Hawk, but Gaara had no idea what his real name was, or if any of the names weren't just covers. He was also relieved when he brought their bodies to Suna, to find that both Sakura and Tonetsu were recovering. At least _someone_ had survived.

But those specific rogues were never seen or heard from again, so they couldn't find out what they had attacked a leaf team for.

If the Ame were behind that incident, Gaara had no doubt that Sakura would want to _personally_ return the favour. This thought made him want to tell her everything, just to bring her here. The strength with which he missed her did not surprise him, but he mulled over its implications, finding himself excited at the prospect of seeing her again. He kept his feelings in check as Baki left the interrogation room and joined him in the observation room. But Baki wasn't stupid, and could see through his façade. The look on his Kazekage's face slightly startled him and he realised that Gaara was going to go all the way to finish this problem, like he had with the Akatsuki.

"Good job," Gaara said, his former Sensei nodding his thanks.

Baki had been missing his calling all those years ago, it would seem. Back when the sand had been devastated, they'd lost every high levelled member of both their Interrogation and Intelligence Departments. Gaara's former Sensei had taken up the head position without a second thought, and hadn't looked back since.

"I'll send the dispatch to the leaf," Baki said.

"No," Gaara said, a little too forcefully, startling his former Sensei and current subordinate.

Gaara knew the standard protocol was just to send a message to any ally that had the right to be involved in what was going on. But he didn't want this written by some Anbu or even Baki. He would prepare the message scroll _himself_ , and address it directly to the Hokage. A part of him hoped Sakura would not come, because he was wary about the way the council would receive her, but he knew she would. It wasn't just this latest development with the Ame rogues, but _their_ unfinished business as well. It was time to put these problems down, once and for all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	16. A Reason To Return.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

Sakura Haruno had been in the Konoha hospital for a few minutes before finding Shizune. She was made the head doctor after the pinkette had turned the position down, shortly after her return to Konoha almost two years ago. Normally, Sakura would've relished the idea of delving into that position, but she'd wanted to spend her time on missions and kicking butt, especially after what had happened between her and Gaara in the Wind Shrine. It just felt good to vent all her frustration and anger on something other than the Kazekage. If she'd even attempted to hit him while she was still in Suna, well, she hadn't been ready to address what had happened back then anymore than she really was now.

"Sakura, you're back," Shizune said happily. "I heard there was a lot of drama over at Suna."

"You could say that. Shizune, do you have a moment?"

"Sure, I was just about to go on my break, if you don't mind me eating while you talk."

Sakura smiled and shook her head.

"Good, I'm _starving_ ," the older medic said, putting emphasis on her hunger.

Sakura chuckled and followed her into her office. The two women had a bad habit of overworking themselves, and like their late friend and shishou, Lady Tsunade, overworking _others_ as well. They got into a rhythm after Tsunade's death of always making sure to check in on each other, as their relationship with the legendary Sannin had instigated years ago. It was good for them. But the pinkette knew now, that this was going to be the last time they did this, at least, the way they _had_ been. She just had a feeling about it.

"You remember Hana Kudamono, the medic from Suna right?" Sakura said, having accepted the older medic's offer of a cup of tea, and sipped on it now. "Well it turns out she had the same idea regarding the training of medics while still at the academy as you did a while back."

"Really?"

Sakura nodded her head. Most students who graduated never rose to Genin level and therefore, according to some, a lot of talent was wasted. This was due to the policy that reduced the number of successful graduating students in the academy. Each village only accepted a certain amount of Shinobi to keep the numbers they generated every year as equal as possible with other villages. But if the skills of those predisposed toward a more medical career were honed earlier on, it would at least increase the amount of medical ninja without stepping over this mark.

That was the current theory anyway.

"I think I should meet with Hana," Shizune said. "She sounds intelligent."

Sakura scoffed, knowing her friend had just complimented herself as well as the Suna medic. "Don't go getting a big head."

Shizune giggled, and then looked up as they were interrupted. Ino Yamanaka stuck her head in and the pinkette sighed. The blonde was her best friend, other than Naruto of course, and she was glad the knucklehead was not with her. But really, the look on her face was a little disconcerting.

"We need to talk," Ino said so seriously that Shizune looked between the two, concerned.

She had no idea what had them so worked up, but decided it was in her best interest to have lunch with Sakura another time.

"I'll see you later," the pinkette promised, stood and followed Ino out of the hospital.

There was no clear path that Ino was taking as she took Sakura's hand and dragged her along behind her. A familiar sight greeted Sakura and she couldn't help the chuckle that escaped her mouth. They were making their way toward the creek just before the Nara forest where she and Ino had promised each other years ago that they would do whatever they could to help each other get laid. It seemed so long ago, and back then, Sakura was still hung up on Sasuke, while Ino had put him behind her, claiming: "what can I say, I prefer them _sane_."

So they sat comfortably against a tree, staring out over the creek, but neither girl wanted to break the silence. For years, they'd either argued over Sasuke or berated each other, but when the Uchiha had abandoned Konoha, their friendship slowly started to rebuild. Sakura had often wondered if this had something to do with Ino moving on from him before _her_ , but realised now that their friendship was more grounded than that. Sakura had abandoned Ino, much like the object of her affections had abandoned _her_ , adding to her feeling of guilt. She had been so stupid.

Tired of the silence, Ino finally spoke.

"Well well forehead," she said cheekily, "it seems I was right about you after all."

Sakura felt her frustration building again. "In what way exactly Ino _pig_?"

"You _were_ having a sex dream that night in Suna."

The pinkette visibly blushed and Ino giggled.

"Give it up Sakura. Look, I'm still not happy that you kept this from me, or that you knocked me out, which I'm still planning on paying back to you but…"

She trailed off, shifting her body to look directly into her friend's green hues.

"I'm so sorry for what happened to you Sakura. I want you to know that, because I love you. You're like the little sister I never wanted, after all."

Sakura squeezed her hand. "Thanks Ino."

"What happened exactly? Kakashi gave us the highlights, like it was Shukaku's fault, and not to bother you over this, although I think that last comment was directed more at Naruto."

"You want the details?" Sakura was surprised at her.

" _No_ forehead," Ino rolled her eyes at her. "I want to know why Shukaku did that, and _how_."

"How should I know?"

"No, I suppose you two never spoke about it for a reason."

Sakura turned her head away from her friend and stared out over the creek, keeping her off of Ino as she spoke.

"He has feelings for me."

"Really? And how do you feel about _him_?"

"I hated him. I was angry for so long, and I could never bring myself to say out loud what he had done, let alone share it with someone who could actually _help_ me. I know it was Shukaku and not _Gaara_ who had done it, deep down, I think I realised it back then as well. But, it all came down to _why_ , for me. Why would Shukaku force him to rape me, and not just kill me."

She looked back at Ino, noting the sympathy on her face. She stayed quiet; the perfect, attentive listener.

"It tormented him," Sakura said, and Ino's eyes widened slightly. "It used his feelings for me as some kind of conduit, to take over his body. It became lust. I think Gaara had liked me for a long time before that. Looking back, I believe it started during the fallout of Deidara's attack."

Ino smiled sadly. "I gotta hand it to him, he knows how to keep it a secret. Do you remember those times Temari dragged him along with us when we went out for drinks?"

Sakura laughed softly. "He would either just accept it with quiet dignity because he was too exhausted to fight, or try and fail to Shunshin away."

"It was a lot _fun_ actually, _tackling_ the Kazekage," Ino said. "I kind of had a crush on him then."

She giggled when Sakura shook her head at her. "Well obviously _that_ passed. He's such an introvert, and I decided long ago I prefer men with more fire in them."

"I know, that's why you went after Kiba after you gave up on Sasuke. I still don't know why you tried Shikamaru though, considering _his_ personality."

Ino laughed. "He's _hot_ , that's why."

She had been sworn to secrecy about Shikamaru and Temari, but had still told Sakura, which she didn't regret, knowing the pinkette wouldn't say anything about it.

"He and Temari look good together," Sakura mused softly.

"You only say that because she's Gaara's sister," Ino poked tongue at her.

"Sorry."

"I was kidding, doofus."

Ino brushed her leg absentmindedly, shifting her body as the grass beneath her started to itch.

"So, how do you feel about the Kazekage _now_?"

Sakura squeezed her friend's hand. "I would think that was obvious."

"Aaww, scared to admit it out loud?"

"No, just not giving you any more ammo."

They kept talking; unimportant things, important things, it didn't matter really. They headed to the commerce district for lunch, and then spent the day together, finally going their separate ways once the sun was ready to set. Sakura was glad for the company, and she didn't feel obligated to talk about Gaara to Ino, who was surprisingly relaxed with her about this. It didn't fit her gossip queen persona. As she headed home, the pinkette decided that come morning, she was going to request to return to Suna with Temari.

X X X

It was early evening, and both Shikamaru Nara and Temari Sabaku had left his office hours ago, after the sand Kunoichi had requested to be allowed to return to Suna as soon as possible. As if anyone was going to try to stop her. Kakashi Hatake was finishing up some paperwork when he found himself wondering how his old Sensei had sat down long enough to do _his_ , seeing as though it had been Minato Namikaze and _not_ Kushina Uzumaki who had passed on the impatience gene to Naruto. At least the severe dislike of sitting still.

He looked up from the latest scrolls, turned in his chair and stared out the window. There was so much going on right now, with the increase in higher levelled missions, and most teams rarely got an overnight stay in the village before having to head out again; he was overworking the Anbu more though, and only certain teams. There were those he'd purposely kept inside the village, to help with the units stationed at the lookout towers, as well as key sections of the village. This was all standard procedure, especially since the anticipation of Pein's attack years ago that had had everyone on edge before it happened. So it was easier to implement security protocols that would have been considered overkill back then.

But what bothered Kakashi the most was the Amegakure rogues and this timing in with the revelation that Sakura had dropped on him. The Suna council had suggested to him a while back that the rogues who'd attacked her Anbu squad two years ago were somehow affiliated with Ame. This had taken on a whole new meaning for the Hokage now, considering one of the repercussions of that attack – not only the loss of two elite Anbu agents, but the violation of Sakura Haruno.

He shivered uncontrollably at this thought.

The things that unnerved _him_ usually turned out to be more than they appeared. Shukaku had done _that_ , taking advantage of the young Kazekage's feelings for Sakura. The pinkette had told Kakashi this in a more "rambling" fashion than actual statement, but he'd heard every word clear as day. It was an indication to his Anbu days, where he'd been very good at making a clear picture of mumblings and sobbing confessions, not that Sakura had been _sobbing_ of course.

It still hadn't sunk into Kakashi, what she'd said, and the fact that Gaara had developed feelings for Sakura. He could barely imagine that young man as anything other than the stoic, seemingly emotionless Kazekage who had defeated an Akatsuki member singlehandedly and spearheaded the campaign to rid the world of the numerous members of that organisation once and for all. Then there was Shikamaru's suggestion about the seal used to imprison Shukaku in the Kazekage. Lady Chiyo was dead, and the sealing experts in Suna had not thought it was prudent to strengthen the seal back when Gaara had become Kazekage, let alone since any of the times since it was originally done that the demon had "peeked" out.

But Naruto's seal was fine. Sure, when he got angry, he would subconsciously draw on the fox's power, but there were ways to deal with that. What was happening with Gaara sounded completely different. The Kyuubi didn't possess Naruto without transforming him in order to violate the closest, critically wounded Kunoichi he happened to have feelings for.

Kakashi sighed. He wasn't trying to belittle anything Gaara was feeling, and truly understood that he wasn't to blame, but this situation had been allowed to boil for almost two years without either Gaara or Sakura saying or doing anything about it. It was starting to affect everything around them, so the reasons behind Shukaku's influence over its host needed to be addressed.

The Hokage pulled out a message scroll and got to work on what he was going to say to the Kazekage. He needed to speak with him. They needed to see if something could be done to prevent some kind of relapse. Perhaps a Konoha Fuuin Jutsu expert could look the seal over. But that was a conversation best had in person. Kakashi held his pen over the scroll, trying to figure out how to put this into words that would leave no doubt he knew what had happened between Gaara and Sakura, but be subtle enough that anyone reading over the Kazekage's shoulder wouldn't realise what this was about. Not that a scroll sent personally by the Hokage to the Kazekage would be opened while someone was standing over Gaara's shoulder.

He just wanted to be cautious.

But nothing came to mind, and he was forced to sit back against his chair again and pinch the bridge of his nose in frustration. Why was it so hard just to say: "Hey fifth Kazekage, sixth Hokage here, can you come over to Konoha so we can discuss why you raped my top medic?"

Kakashi groaned softly at the light tone the voice in his head had just made of the situation. He needed to get these weird thoughts out of his head.

"Legal problems or domestic troubles?"

The voice did not startle Kakashi as he'd sensed his presence a moment before. Typically, Anbu were always coming into buildings via windows rather than the convenient door. Being ex-Anbu himself, he couldn't remember a time while in the elite organisation when he'd actually _used_ a door. This by no means meant he never _had_ , just that he was losing his mind. How else did one explain a throbbing at the back of their head that always started when trying to _think_?

"Neither," he replied, not insulted when the masked operative didn't enter his office, instead crouching on the windowsill.

"I'm guessing it's paperwork then."

"Getting warmer."

A small chuckle came from the Anbu but he waited for the Hokage to elaborate.

Kakashi sighed. "I have to write something, but I don't know how to do it without sounding either insensitive or arrogantly overbearing."

Another chuckle. "No surprise there."

"Did you come here to hand in a mission report or give me a reason to send you straight back out again?"

Kakashi had promised him a few days off, and was ready to renege if he didn't _back_ off. He was feeling extra tetchy, so the Anbu just shrugged it off, not wanting to spend another two weeks so packed with missions he barely had any time to rest his eyes, let alone use the _bathroom_. The normal missions were a bit thin lately, but the work load for the Anbu was slowly increasing. He wondered if maybe Kakashi was doing this on purpose.

The silver haired man just sighed, trying to release his annoyance in a more constructive way. Really, getting riled wasn't his _thing_ , but sometimes he needed to vent. This feeling had increased periodically after being named Hokage.

"It concerns our dear fellow former Kunoichi team mate," Kakashi said.

Against regulations, Yamato climbed in through the window and stood in front of Kakashi, lifting his mask to reveal his concerned face. He wasn't as close to Sakura as say, Naruto or Kakashi, not even as much as Sai these days, but he was always worried about the people he considered friends. Their time together as "Team Kakashi" may have come to an end, but he remembered it fondly. Especially the times he would scare Naruto silent with just a look and by the foreboding tone to his voice. Apparently, this was something one did not witness very often unless Sakura was around, angry and ready for some fisticuffs. But come to think about it, Yamato hadn't seen her hit him in a _very_ long time.

"Anything I'm cleared to know?" He asked.

Kakashi shook his head. "Let's just say, she's put me in a difficult position, and if it wasn't for the fact that it isn't even remotely her fault, I think I'd probably punish her by sending her on missions alone with Gai Maito for a few weeks, or someone else she finds equally creepy."

Yamato smiled softly, understanding completely. That guy was too goofy.

"Don't worry about it," Kakashi said, when the wood user still looked concerned. "The damage is done; I'm just the cleanup crew."

Yamato raised his eyebrows at his Hokage: like he wasn't going to be worried about _that_ comment.

He nodded compliantly however, and removed a small scroll from the rectangular pouch on his waistband and handed it to the Hokage. The normal uniform for an Anbu, depending on whether the mission was undercover or not, consisted of special armour, reinforced armguards and a mask – more often than not bearing animalistic features. But sometimes the "uniform" was directly affected by the mission, where a few alterations would become necessary. An Anbu was meant to blend into their surroundings, regardless however.

"That's the latest from our spies in the land of tea," he said.

Before Kakashi could answer, let alone unseal the scroll, there was a knock on his door. It was a member of the Cipher Core, except the message this woman he often forgot the name of (Arishi or Narushi or _something_ ), was as unsealed as the one in Kakashi's hand. He realised a moment later, that the insignia on the outside indicated it was from the sand. He also quickly recognised the handwriting of the young Kazekage. He accepted the scroll, waited for the Cipher Core operative to leave, and then turned to face Yamato.

"I'm in your way," Yamato guessed, replacing his mask. "I'll see you in a few days Hokage-sama, after I've rested."

He shunshined away and Kakashi unsealed the scroll quickly, a little anxious by what he might be about to read. How curious it was that Gaara would send this, when _he_ had also decided to send one of his own. Except this scroll mentioned nothing about Sakura Haruno. He read it thoroughly, his brow creasing deeper with every word.

' _And yet I find myself as annoyed with this as I am with the situation surrounding the Kunoichi,'_ he thought, wishing he could join Yamato on his "sabbatical".

X X X

The next morning, Kakashi found himself bombarded... _again_. He'd sent for them, but he still felt overwhelmed by the presence of Temari Sabaku and Shikamaru Nara when they arrived in his office. He was more than happy to accept Temari's request to return to Suna earlier than she'd planned, and needed to order some Anbu along for the journey. But that message he'd received from the Kazekage last night weighed heavily on him and Kakashi was silently adamant about the Anbu.

So Shikamaru was here, as was Naruto Uzumaki, who had just now burst into the room without knocking. Ino Yamanaka and Sakura Haruno followed him, and Kakashi took note of the way everyone except Ino and Naruto were now casting furtive glances in the direction of the pinkette. Ino had clearly talked with Sakura since yesterday, while Naruto was blatantly switching his gaze between Sakura and Kakashi. He held nothing back after all.

Kakashi chuckled. "It would seem everyone who just came back from Suna is back in this office, ready to go again."

"Hokage-sama," Sakura said, walking toward Kakashi, ignoring everyone else in the room.

"Sakura," Kakashi said warmly. "What can I do for you?"

"I heard what happened," she said, talking about the rumours circulating about more attacks by the Ame rogues, not to mention the rumour that the Kazekage had sent a personal message to the Hokage about it.

"Yes?"

"I wish to be placed on the team that is heading to Suna."

"Are you sure that's wise, Sakura?"

She nodded her head. She wasn't going to beg, but Kakashi knew her well enough to know that she wouldn't take "no" for an answer. She would probably just sneak out anyway, and without a squad, he didn't want to think about how far she would get in this current climate. He had tried to be diplomatic with Ame, as had Gaara, but the Kazekage seemed ready to get into that mould he'd made of himself back when they'd worked together to take down the Akatsuki. He understood the motivation was the same for both – revenge.

At least he wasn't like Sasuke.

Kakashi sighed. "Okay, and I'm sending you all back, with at least one Anbu squad. The Kazekage contacted me using Takamaru last night, but I'll leave the details for him to explain to you all. It seems their prisoner is finally talking."

They left with their mission details, separated to grab their belongings, and Sakura was the first one at the check-in booth, being manned by Kotetsu Hagane and Izumo Kamizuki.

"Going on a mission Sakura?" Izumo asked unnecessarily.

Sakura nodded to Izumo as a squad of Anbu arrived. She recognised Yamato immediately, despite the mask. She just knew he was smiling at her from under that mask.

Yamato was actually smirking. He'd wanted a few days off, but couldn't stop himself from worrying about Sakura, and after hearing all those rumours. So he'd asked Kakashi if he could take his sabbatical later. It wasn't like he was about to drop from exhaustion. He'd taken a soldier pill and had a handful of them ready just in case.

"Long time no see, Sakura," he said, his voice hinting to the smirk on his face.

She grinned at him and he inclined his head. The only person missing now was Sai, she thought, but knew he was probably out on some undercover assassination or something. A few minutes later, Ino arrived, followed by Naruto, Hinata, then Temari half dragging Shikamaru behind her.

"Hinata?"

The blue haired Hyuuga smiled at Sakura. "No, I'm not coming with you; I'm just seeing Naruto off."

"She made sure I was wearing clean underwear this time," Naruto stated shamelessly.

Everybody present visibly cringed.

"Well anyway," Sakura readjusted the bag on her back. "Shall we go?"

Hinata surprised everyone by throwing her arms around Sakura instead of Naruto. It was then that the pinkette remembered that she and Naruto kept no secrets from each other. So seeing Naruto off had just been an excuse. Sakura hugged her back as the Hyuuga whispered in her ear.

"Good luck."

Ino pried Sakura away and they left the formerly shy girl behind.

Sakura spent the entire three days travelling feeling like a nervous wreck. She hadn't seen Gaara for the better part of a week and it was slowly sinking into her that she was heading straight for him! Her companions didn't bother her, but occasionally, she caught one or two glancing at her. She ignored this.

They passed into the desert, crossed without incident, probably due to their numbers, and as the sight of Suna looming in the distance, Sakura couldn't stop the hammering in her heart. Gaara stood side by side with Kankuro, two escorts behind them, waiting patiently. The crimson of his hair caught her attention first.

The Kazekage was not surprised to see Sakura amongst the leaf ninja arriving, alongside Temari. He glanced at his sister, who was looking at him oddly, and then he looked at Naruto, who was impassive, except the strange twitching of his left eye. Gaara had a bad feeling about this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	17. After The Meeting.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

It was an awkward silence that greeted them and as the only one who had no idea what was going on, Kankuro stood there, his eyes narrowed, looking back and forth between the leaf ninja (ignoring the Anbu), Temari, and then finally to his little brother. There were mixed expressions, but the only ones not remotely confused, annoyed or frustrated were Gaara and Sakura.

Naruto looked ready to kill Gaara, and he felt that way as well. How could he _do_ that? And to Sakura? Three days spent travelling had not simmered the leaf jinchuriki, and it was only the fact that Sakura was close by that was stopping him from knocking the Kazekage's block off right now. He had to keep reminding himself what Kakashi had said, and the promise he'd made him later, _not_ to get angry and create a political mess. Naruto was getting a bit tetchy after the revelation about Gaara and Sakura, and after Ino had told him off and he'd found Hinata, he'd done some _serious_ calming down.

His natural stamina aside, he'd worn Hinata out and so vigorously that he'd had to apologise to her. She had had no idea what had gotten into him, and although she enjoyed the manner in which he'd chosen to vent, her questioning expression had not gone unanswered. So Naruto told her what had happened, knowing she would _never_ repeat it, even though he was worried she'd given herself away with that hug she'd given Sakura before they had all left Konoha. He clenched his fists, glaring at his fellow jinchuriki and drawing attention to himself when he growled softly. He ignored them, wanting, no _needing_ to vent.

Shikamaru grabbed Naruto, not roughly, but by no means gently. He had started to move forward, and was now trying to free himself of the lazy man's grip.

"I'm not going to do anything to him!" Naruto said loudly, not convincing anyone.

"Stop being troublesome Naruto," Shikamaru drawled. "Pipe down."

"Do I have to hurt you Naruto?" Yamato said, and even behind his Anbu mask, it was clearly annoyed.

Sakura glanced at him, wondering how much Kakashi had told him, and placed her hand on Naruto's shoulder; their eyes locked for a moment, and then the blonde jinchuriki calmed down. He huffed at her.

" _Fine_ ," he said sulkily. "I was just going to hug him a 'hello' anyway."

"Yeah," Ino said sarcastically, "and then put an exploding tag on his back."

Gaara, for his part, didn't shift his neutral expression. He just watched them, his mind reeling. He had known that after everything that something was going to have to give, and was at least glad he hadn't been in the room when Naruto found out what happened. He wasn't sure what the blonde would do to him if no-one else was around. He was certainly fast enough to circumvent his sand shield if he wanted to. There would be no avoiding that. But as reckless as Naruto was, his friends were not so prone to such crazed outbursts.

The Kazekage shifted his pale eyes from his fellow jinchuriki and they rested on dazzling green eyes as he found Sakura staring back at him.

Kankuro watched the exchange, even more confused. What the _hell_ was up with them?

"Okay, what the _fuck_ is up with you lot?" He asked, unable to contain himself after a few moments.

This seemed to break the ice and Temari chuckled at him.

"Yeah, we all do look stupid just standing here, don't we? What's say we move this glaring contest indoors?"

X X X

The meeting with the council had run into the rest of the day, and then the night. It was now was eight o'clock, and if it wasn't for the fact that they'd taken breaks, in order to rest up, use the bathroom, and to eat, Sakura would've bitten her own arm off out of hunger by now. Those idiots knew how to piss her off. Sure, they held the Amegakure rogue in _their_ dungeon, but this was supposed to be a joint operation dammit! And what's more, the rogues were after Naruto as well, not just the Kazekage. They had no right to ramble on about jurisdictional boundaries! Luckily, Gaara's opinions on their sharing of knowledge had a positive effect on every one of those _idiots_.

' _Speaking of that walking, talking hunk of meat.'_

Sakura excused herself from her friends to speak with Gaara, ignoring the mutinous look on Naruto's face. He glared at her and Gaara both, but didn't do anything this time. Ino dragged him away amidst Shikamaru's muttering. Yamato inclined his head to the Kazekage. The masked operative, who Gaara had noticed Sakura seemed to know regardless, had made several attempts already, to speak with Gaara alone. This indicated to the Kazekage that the Hokage had sent him to Suna personally.

He was another of Sakura's friends with an agenda regarding him, it seemed.

The Kazekage nodded to him: they would talk later. Clearly, the Anbu wished to speak with him _alone_. The hallway emptied within a matter of seconds, and Sakura was left alone with Gaara.

He had watched the backs of her retreating friends; even without that incident upon their arrival in Suna, it was obvious to him that Temari, Ino, Shikamaru, and Naruto all knew what had happened between him and Sakura. He had been anxious before now, what their reactions would be if they ever found out; although he had yet to need his sand armour, Gaara was still concerned. He had lost some respect from Naruto, and this hurt more than he was willing to admit. Despite Shukaku's influence, he hoped that the blonde would one day forgive him. He could bare Ino's glares, Shikamaru's quiet frustration, and even the disappointed glances Temari gave him (she wasn't looking to pound him into the ground him after all), but Naruto was another thing altogether.

"Can we talk?" Sakura noted the slight change in Gaara's features. She made a mental note to start pummelling Naruto again if he starts anything. He nodded to her question and she took his hand in hers.

"Come on Gaara; let's head back to your room. I won't bite, I promise."

His eyes widened slightly and she couldn't help but grin at him. Her heart was racing as she stared into those pale eyes and she shoved him gently.

"Lead the way, Kazekage."

They headed over to his mansion, and Sakura wondered about the maidservants that tended to their Kazekage. Apparently, they came when he wasn't here so that they didn't disturb him. She realised she was nervous and forced herself to focus. There was nothing to be nervous _about_ , right?

"So," she said, staring around at the sheer enormity of the place. "Which is _your_ room?"

Gaara chuckled softly, unable to hide the mirth. "Here," he said, pulled her close and shunshined them upstairs.

They landed directly in front of his bed, and a second later, he stepped backward and pulled her with him as he sat on the edge of the bed; she slid easily onto his lap, straddling him. He was behaving more boldly now, one hand running up her back while the other holding her steady. She smiled down at him, the cheek on her face bringing a small grin to his.

"I didn't know you were so…" She let that trail off, waving her hand around in a casual manner. "And here I was, hoping we could _talk_."

"About?"

She giggled. "What we're doing."

"Right now?"

She felt like _hitting_ him, until she realised he was teasing her. His face was calm, with no outward proof that he was just playing around, and Sakura wondered _who_ this person sitting under her really was. If it wasn't for the fact that he'd used his sand to Shunshin them up here, she'd be accusing him of being some foreign Shinobi spy and start looking for the ninja hidden in the closet.

Well, _after_ she pounded him with her chakra fist of course.

"Stop teasing me," she warned him, and he cracked a minute smile before putting his serious face back on.

"I honestly don't know what to say Sakura, other than I want you to stay with me. I want this not to be some temporary thing, whatever this _is_. I don't want to watch you run from Suna again and wonder when I'm going to see you again. And more than all of that, I don't want to hurt you, ever again."

"You're worried about Shukaku?"

"I am always worried about Shukaku," he said softly. "Ever since I decided to stop answering to that thing's every whim."

"Since your fight with Naruto outside Konoha during the Chunin exams?"

He nodded. "It's always there though; whether I'm meditating or wide awake."

"You can't sleep at all?" What had he been doing in the Wind Shrine a week ago?

"I can rest," he said. "The meditation technique allows this."

Sakura understood. The way the technique worked was to maintain his conscious awareness while his body was the one rejuvenated through the physical recuperation that sleep normally provided. This made sure he kept his mind the entire time, although occasionally, there was a risk he might "drift off". But even after all the time that the pinkette had spent with Hana Kudamono to increase the duration from several minutes to several hours, there had been an opportunity to convert this process into sleep. He had yet to incorporate it, it would seem. But she supposed it required stricter chakra control than he was used to. A medic could do it, Hana perhaps, but not Gaara.

' _Unless I find a way to increase the chakra flow to compensate,'_ Sakura thought.

If they used Shukaku's chakra maybe… It was still dangerous. She shook herself of these thoughts. They were best left until later. She shifted above Gaara, licking her lips as she made a decision.

Sakura lifted her hand to the Kazekage's face, enjoying the way Gaara's eyes flickered at her touch, and the shift in his expression. He was entranced by her. It was surreal to her, that someone could love her this way. And that she would ever have this kind of effect on _anyone_. _How_ had she done this to him? Once upon a time, she had daydreamed that Sasuke would look at her like this, and even when he died, and she'd started dating Naruto, nothing could compare to _this_. Naruto's sweet words of love and the gentlemanly way he had waited until she was ready before they'd had sex, could not compare to how Gaara was making her feel right now.

"Sakura," he said softly. "Are you sure this is what you really want?"

"Tell me to go away then," she said softly, her voice slightly taunting. "Tell me you don't want me."

He stared into her eyes, suddenly wary. "Is this a dream?"

"Have you been dreaming of me lately?"

She was surprised when he nodded his head. He could dream while meditating? That didn't sound possible.

"The demon won't leave me alone because I love you."

Sakura blushed slightly. "I love you too Gaara."

Gaara swallowed heavily, not sure how to respond.

She shifted her body again, her calf muscles screaming for release. Despite his fervour, and the fact that he was the one who had pulled _her_ onto his bed, and not the other way around, he was still concerned. It had been a week since their make out session in the Wind Shrine and he'd had some time to think about what had happened between them. Had it just been lust? Was Shukaku's silence in his head only a temporary reprieve? His dreams were fixated on her, with or without the demon's prodding. So did this mean he could never touch her without it wanting to hurt her?

"Are you sure this is what you really want?" He repeated, as her left hand absentmindedly drew circles over his Kazekage uniform, where his heart was. "What if I hurt you again?"

"You can't hurt me if I _want_ you. Shukaku is just a perverted demon looking for a fix, but you can control it if I let you in."

His heart raced faster in his chest, and he couldn't help the nervousness in his voice. "What if I lose control again?"

"You won't," she said, and pressed a finger to his mouth to stop him from speaking anymore. "Stop worrying, stop thinking, just _feel_."

Sakura lowered her mouth to his tentatively. She licked his lips and slid her tongue into his mouth once he parted his lips and let her in. She used both of her hands to grab the back of his head, tangling her fingers through his hair as he pulled her closer. His hands rested respectfully on her hips, not wandering. She admired his gentlemanliness, considering their history, but it wasn't necessary. Sakura moved his right hand up, indicating what she wanted, and then let go as he ran the hand along her stomach, sliding the zipper on her red top down and grabbing her left breast roughly.

She let out a soft yelp, excited, and smiled into his mouth. Breaking the kiss, Gaara lifted her top over her head, and unwrapped the bandage from her torso, exposing her now unbound breasts. He took a moment to soak in the sight as she grinned cheekily down at him, and then lowered his mouth to them, cupping the both of them in his hands, tasting her at the same time. She wasn't large, but by no means small. Her chest was perfect and succulent, the nipples hardening for him as he suckled them.

She bit her bottom lip as a contented sigh erupted from her, caressing his hair lovingly, and enjoying the feel of the crimson strands between her fingers. Once Gaara was finished with her breasts, wanting more, he trailed his lips down to her flat stomach, his hands working on her pink skirt, undoing the clasps that held the apron-like material together. She groaned, leaning back and helping him to remove the tight black shorts underneath, as well as her underwear.

The sight of her naked body was not unfamiliar to him, but somehow, in the soft light of the moon coming in through the window, she seemed so much more _feminine_ ; not unlike some fantastical, creamy delicious dream.

Sakura ripped off his Kazekage uniform with as much force as possible, while still refraining from tearing the material. It was a struggle, to resist that _urge_. The light grey wrap around vest came off first, then the long, parted shirt and finally, the maroon pants. Gaara was pleasantly surprised by her vigour. She was still straddling his lap, both of them naked and _aroused_ , the most powerful _hungry_ look on her face.

Sakura was so excited her eyes roving his face, and brushed her hand down over that well toned bare chest. She lowered her mouth to those pectoral muscles, trailing her lips down the smooth skin as she pushed him forcefully, onto his back. His muscle was twitching before she even reached it. She licked him, caressed him, and moaned, giving him cause to rise. But she didn't want him to come into her mouth.

Sakura sat up and stared down at him. He smiled, understanding, and they switched positions.

She had gotten the feeling that he wasn't as experienced as she was, so she kissed his lips quickly, moving her hand to his to guide him to her womanhood. His hand took over without her help and he soon found a rhythm as he thrust his fingers into her opening. She soaked him, groaning and exclaiming at the same time. But Gaara wanted more. He wasn't sure what he was doing, but something about her naked body and the trembling of her lower lip made all his inhibitions just fall away.

He broke the kiss, his mouth trailing kisses down her skin as she pulled on his hair; just enough to create tension on the scalp. He paused at her breasts, clipping the nipples with his teeth, eliciting a soft growl from the beautiful Kunoichi writhing underneath him. He was moving further now, brushing his lips along the porcelain of her skin as he went, feeling his member throb painfully with every sound she emitted.

Gaara parted Sakura's creamy legs as far as they would go as he reached her wet sex; as his teeth grazed her nether lips, she bucked upward involuntarily, half-screaming now. He explored her cavern with his tongue until she came again, and then rose to return to kissing her mouth; her reaction to tasting herself on his mouth was to ravish his lips eagerly. He teased her, grinding her pelvis with his muscle as she moved her hips to match his movements.

Sakura grunted, biting his bottom lip. "Stop teasing me."

Gaara smiled into her mouth, and pushed into her. She welcomed her lover in, lifting her body as his hips thrust down to meet hers. He could never have anticipated this sensation. A rippling current, like electricity, shot through him. He knew what it felt like to lie inside her, but this was completely different. This was consensual, this was sensory over drive, and _this_ was ecstasy. His entire body was on fire. He hovered over the pinkette, pushing slowly at first, and then when she dug her nails into his torso, he moved faster. It was just instinct now, reacting to the subtle and not so subtle signs she was giving him; he was captivated by the glassy green of her eyes as she lost herself in the moment.

Sakura threw her head back, breaking their kiss as she screamed his name. She didn't notice the blush on his face at the sound of her exclamation as she closed her eyes for a moment, on the verge of losing control. She snapped her eyes open when he gave a particularly rough thrust into her and pulled him down to her, crashing their lips together again, and wrapping her arms around his neck as she lifted her knees. He sunk in deeper and they both groaned at the same time. Without meaning to, he had hit a spot deeper inside her that exploded hot, white stars in her eyes.

Sakura screamed again, her voice unintelligible.

Gaara kept this pace going, hitting that same spot, over and over again, excited by her sounds, and the way his movements were making her tighten around him. He could hardly believe this was happening, and once Sakura had come from the relentless tension, he found himself flipped onto his back. She was clearly the dominant type, and so as the pinkette started to rise and fall above him, he pulled her into a ferocious kiss, trying to outdo her with his mouth. They wrestled their tongues and finally, his determination won out.

She moaned into his mouth, and his hands gripped her thighs, bringing her down to him faster.

Sakura barely registered anything other than the very male scent of the Kazekage, and the throbbing of him inside her as she clenched around him. She was peaking again, she could feel it: it was coming. She threw her head back, letting it all out as her body trembled, a familiar warmth spreading throughout her abdomen accompanying the final thrust of Gaara's erection into her. Except that now, he was finally coming down from his high.

She collapsed on top of him, not having the energy to move as she closed her eyes, loving the fact that he was still inside of her, and listening to his heartbeat. It was still faster than normal, but in the after sex, she knew this was only natural. Unable to stop herself, Sakura fell into a comfortable sleep, his name passing over her lips with a whisper.

"Gaara…"

X X X

The sun was only thirty minutes away when Yamato left the accommodations that had been prepared for the Anbu squad who had accompanied the ninja back to Suna. He respected that Sakura wanted some time alone with Gaara, as he'd heard the details from Kakashi after all, after being sworn to secrecy. The other three Anbu members who he had left back in the accommodations didn't know what the Kazekage had done, and with good reason. The laws were clear on this kind of thing, but because of the fact that it was the fifth Kazekage and not some random ninja, the decision whether or not to make his violation of a leaf Kunoichi public rested on the Hokage and the Kunoichi in question.

' _Sakura.'_

Yamato could admit to himself, as he jumped from one building shadow to another, on his way to the Kazekage mansion, that he felt angry. The pinkette wasn't just another leaf Kunoichi. She wasn't just another medic: she was the best. She was beloved, and coveted. The Shinobi of Konoha, hell, even the civilians, had fallen over themselves just to get near her. She'd lost that temper that used to scare the majority of the male population away, and her looks and talents were bringing out the male versions of the fan girls; not that the pinkette had actually noticed.

She worked too hard.

Plus, despite her experience with Naruto, she still had that air of naivety about her. And of course, ever since Sasuke Uchiha's death, people had expected her to retreat into a shell and perhaps never recover. But those were people who didn't know her very well, if at all.

She was stronger than that.

Yamato slunk into the shadow of another building, finally standing directly in front of the door to the Kazekage mansion. His grip on the message scroll in his hand tightened. He could sense that Sakura was in there, her chakra signature all too familiar to him. He had to steel his emotions, which wasn't difficult really, but took a little longer than it should have.

' _I'm getting too old for this.'_

He knocked on the door. It was time to wake the Kazekage up and have the "talk" with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	18. Growing Obsession.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

Matsuri Hamanaku watched as the leaf ninja arrived alongside Lady Temari, took note of the way the Kazekage greeted their new _guests_ , her eyes roving over the Kunoichi with pink hair, and had to control her urge to attack her right then and there. What the fuck was _she_ doing back here? The leaf medic Kunoichi had seemed okay at first, for the last seven years since she'd first met her. That was a long time ago, long before Sasuke Uchiha had died attacking the village hidden in the leaves; even before Gaara had become the Kazekage.

Matsuri remembered the squads of leaf ninja who had arrived after the Akatsuki had come for Lord Gaara and almost destroyed Suna. Funnily enough, she also remembered the last conversation she'd had with Sakura Haruno before the last of the leaf support teams had finally left to return to Konoha, several months after the destruction in Suna. She had told Matsuri about her plans to get Sasuke Uchiha back to Konoha, and how much she loved him. Apparently, Sakura could _never_ love anyone the way she loved the one and only Sasuke Uchiha.

' _And I believed her!'_

The _bitch_ had lied to her! This was painfully obvious to Matsuri as she watched the leaf ninja return, along with Temari. The sand Chunin was on guard duty, a mere eight feet above the heads of the arrivals, and listening to every word they were saying. Naruto Uzumaki's behaviour made her growl softly, but she wasn't supposed to be eavesdropping, and normally she followed that regulation, but this was the Kazekage, and anything concerning Gaara drew the brunette's attention.

She had been spending more time with Gaara, developing a rapport so that he could see she was worthy of him. Everyone knew they were friends. But her intentions with him went beyond that. At first, it had started with the typical fan girl attention that others were still showering the Kazekage with, but she quickly discovered that he wasn't the kind of guy that responded to that. He was cool, calm and collected, his emotions never betraying him, and girls who screamed their affections for him never drew his attention.

Matsuri had been hoping that by toning down her fan girl persona, that he would let her in under that quiet exterior of his. And it had worked. He had accepted her into his thoughts, and they would occasionally hang out; although he never sought her out unless she was already in the general vicinity.

But he had never once expressed any feelings for Sakura Haruno. Gaara was too grounded for the kind of fairytale romances that would explain away how he would suddenly be in love with the pinkette. Matsuri refused to accept the idea that Sakura might have his heart. It was _disgusting_.

But when she got off her guard duty shift, the Chunin sought them out, discovering that the group that had arrived from Konoha was in an all day meeting with the council. They took breaks of course, and Matsuri returned to the building periodically, in between her duties around the village, trying to get Lord Gaara alone, but ultimately failing. Everyone was keeping an annoyingly close eye on him, so much so that she realised there was something else going on, beyond the strange conversation she'd overheard that morning. Whatever it was, she was sure it wasn't Gaara's fault.

The sun had set before the meeting broke up and Matsuri tried to follow Gaara again, only to be cut off by Sakura… _again_. Temari caught the Chunin's attention and gave her a new guard duty post. It was just some stupid assignment about some ridiculous Genins, so Matsuri nodded her head, took off and then backtracked and followed Lord Gaara again. Nobody was watching _her_ , and the sister to the Kazekage trusted her implicitly.

On a rooftop, some distance from the Hokage mansion, but close enough to make out distinctive shapes, Matsuri knelt in the shadow of a larger adjacent building. She stared out over the scene before her, her mind reeling at what she was seeing: Gaara and Sakura, in his room, making out. She felt sick to her stomach, but couldn't tear her eyes away from the sight as they started to undress and her own sounds of frustration and anger went unheard.

They were sprawled on the bed now, and oblivious to the eyes of their audience. She took short, ragged breaths, watching every movement, every shift as their bodies seemed to meld together; from this distance, they were mere outlines to her, but only an idiot wouldn't realise what they were doing. The night was silent but for the distinctive sounds of Gaara and Sakura having sex in his master bedroom.

Matsuri felt like crying, a sob caught in the back of her throat as she dug her nails into her forearms, hugging herself tightly. Sakura was particularly loud now, his name on her lips, and the watching Chunin gagged slightly. She wanted to run in there and kill the pinkette, or at least to scream obscenities at her, but this was not the kind of thing Gaara would forgive her for. He was her friend, only her friend: this was painfully clear to her. He didn't want her, he would never want her.

' _What am I doing?'_

Matsuri had pushed herself to no longer be that squealing fan girl who could never get the Kazekage's attention. It was so imprinted on her now, that she baulked at the idea of regressing into that and acting like she was dating the Kazekage when in fact she was just in a fantasy. She was obsessed, this was true, but she could see the obsession in her mind's eye. There was no coming back from it, and given a chance, she would make sure that Sakura would never be in Gaara's life, ever again.

But she wasn't a killer, or some sadistic stalker.

The sounds coming from the upstairs bedroom eventually faded, with both parties exhausted and content. Matsuri continued to watch them as they held each other. Gaara was stroking her, their bodies entwined though no longer joined. The Chunin still couldn't tear her eyes away, and it wasn't until she sensed a nearby chakra signature that she blinked heavily and noticed that someone was heading for the Kazekage mansion.

The masked leaf ninja didn't seem to notice Matsuri. She wasn't completely surprised by this, considering she was stationary, in the shadows, and masking her chakra. She was a Chunin, but her Jounin squad commander, Nusan had told her she was ready for the Jounin levels. He was an ex-Anbu, so he knew what he was talking about.

Another reason could be that the leaf Shinobi wasn't looking for a voyeur, hidden in the shadows.

She was angry with Sakura yes, but also disgusted with herself.

Matsuri watched as Lord Gaara got out of bed, redressed himself, and met the Konoha ninja at the door downstairs. She couldn't hear what they were talking about once the door was shut and she lost sight of them both. The only reason she could think of that a leaf Anbu would be visiting the Kazekage in the middle of the night (well, it was actually almost sunrise, but whatever), was for some top secret communiqué between the two Kages.

Matsuri glanced angrily at the sleeping form of Sakura Haruno before sprinting away from the mansion, keeping to the shadows.

 

X X X

 

Gaara hadn't fallen asleep of course, despite his exhaustion. But he had closed his eyes, trying to at least rest as Sakura fell asleep, curled up next to him. Her easy, deep breaths were melodic to his ears and he focused on the sound as he tried to meditate. The presence of the beautiful pinkette, snuggling his chest proved a very successful distraction however, and he settled for staring out the window, waiting for the sun to rise, instead.

Just a day ago, he was still just longing for Sakura, and for the last week, she had occupied every waking moment, invaded every instant of unconscious thought. It had felt like a dream, his memory of their conversation in the wind shrine. But it _had_ been real, he was here with her, right now.

As Gaara pulled the pinkette closer to him, Sakura subconsciously wrapped her arm over his waist, coiling her left leg up and over his thigh. His skin flush against hers, Gaara couldn't help but be excited by the contours of her body; from her womanly curves to the feel of her groin against his thigh. He didn't _want_ to fall asleep anymore, running his right hand along her side and pressing his lips to the crown of her head. He could stay this way forever, if the fates were willing.

She murmured in her sleep, and he bent his head lower, trying to hear what she was saying. He caught titbits like… "Told you so… shut it Ino… love you…"

He liked to believe that last part was about him. He lifted her chin slightly, kissed her lips, and murmured back the words to her. In response, she gripped him tighter, shifting her body against him as though attempting to tease him, sexually. If he wasn't a hundred percent sure she was asleep, he'd think she was faking those deep, even breaths. She moaned then, making him groan softly, and he tried to resist the temptation to wake her up and start pleasing her again.

But Gaara couldn't resist the urge to stroke her, his hips moving in time with hers as she moaned again. He chuckled softly, his hand now resting on the underside of her bum. He wanted to go further, perhaps see if she would wake up on her own, without his _prodding_ , but he realised a moment later that someone was at his front door. He sensed them a few seconds before they knocked on the wood.

Inwardly groaning, he cursed at the bad timing. This person was a ninja, so they weren't going to just go away.

The cool breeze coming in through the open window did not stir the pinkette, nor did the movement of the bed as Gaara rolled away from her, dressed himself, and hurried downstairs. He moved quickly and quietly as any Shinobi would, but his reasons were less about stealth and more natural. This was the way he moved normally anyway. Ninja traversed great distances often, and the stealth training would eventually bleed into everyday life. He would be a low rate Shinobi if it hadn't done so for him as well.

Gaara didn't immediately recognise the chakra signature on the other side of his front door, but then quickly realised it was one of the leaf Anbu who had accompanied Sakura back to Suna. He opened his door with trepidation, but didn't hesitate to do so. He would never let anyone see him squirm just for an inappropriately timed visit to his home. Especially given that the sleeping form of Sakura Haruno now lay in his bed upstairs.

"Kazekage-sama," the Anbu greeted him appropriately. "I apologise for the late hour, but under orders from my Hokage I need to speak with you away from prying eyes."

Gaara nodded and let him into his home, then led him to the living room. Yamato removed his mask and the young Kazekage recognised him immediately. The Anbu nodded his head to him.

"I see you recall my face."

Gaara nodded silently again. Yamato smiled at him. It wasn't a fake smile, but still, the twinkling did not reach his eyes.

"Yes, I was on Sakura's team. Team Kakashi, Lady Tsunade called us. Not sure I was ever comfortable with that to be honest with you. Not that I ever disliked Kakashi or thought of him as any kind of a rival, but I have my pride as an Anbu elite after all."

Gaara smiled softly as well, more nervous than he was letting on. The fact that Naruto and the others knew he'd raped Sakura meant that the Hokage was definitely well aware as well. He _was_ their former Sensei after all. And this Yamato, or whatever his real name was, had brought up his connection with them on purpose. Was he trying to tell him to stay away from Sakura? No, the Hokage wouldn't send an Anbu, even one so close to Sakura, just to say _that_. Naruto would have sufficed, to pass _that_ message along.

So it had to have something to do with the scroll in Yamato's hands.

"I take it Sakura's upstairs," Yamato said, taking the offered seat in the Kazekage's downstairs living room.

Gaara glanced skyward for a moment before nodding silently to him.

Yamato sighed. "I didn't come here to berate you Gaara, but Sakura is very important to me, to everyone who knows her. I hope you understand that."

The Kazekage nodded _again_ , glancing at the scroll in Yamato's hands. The Anbu member ignored this for now, wanting to talk about Sakura for a minute. He was slightly surprised that Sakura had spent the night with Gaara, despite the fact that she'd already forgiven him. This obviously meant she felt _something_ for the Kazekage, considering she didn't share Ino's naturally promiscuous tendencies. Yamato knew from experience just how forward Ino could be when horny, not that he'd given into her, but it was so different to Sakura's normal hesitancy (again, nothing happened there; this was just an observation of his). The pinkette ignored other people's affections, unless it was just friendship or family.

So why was she sleeping with Gaara so quickly?

He mentally shook himself. Really, it was none of his business, just as long as Gaara wasn't taking advantage of her again.

Yamato placed the scroll Kakashi had given him onto the small table between him and the Kazekage. He changed his mind about bringing up Sakura again, getting down to business instead.

"As you may have realised, this is from my Hokage, and personally addressed to you. I don't know for sure what it says of course, but I can guess."

Gaara accepted it and stared at Kakashi's handwriting on the outside of it for a moment before unsealing it and reading it carefully. It mentioned the situation surrounding the Amegakure rogues and even stated his agreement with the Suna council that this might be connected to the group that attacked Sakura Haruno two years ago, and the Anbu squad escorting her. Kakashi also gave his personal assurances that Konoha would help in every way possible to get to the bottom of what was going on, as well as his concerns for Gaara and Naruto.

He explained that his decision to allow Naruto to return to Suna was about making sure that they worked together on this, despite "recent and personal revelations". He hoped that Naruto would put the mission before acting on any issues and wished Gaara good luck on making sure that happened. As a personal note, he expressed his sympathy for him and asked him to keep Sakura safe.

Lastly, he made a vague mention of the seal restraining Shukaku and suggested he consider having someone recheck it.

" _If you want a reason, it is because Shikamaru voiced his concern on this matter that may have led to the event between you and Sakura two years ago. It might do you the world of good to look into this. You know how smart Shikamaru is, and he's never wrong about this kind of thing."_

There was no denying that the Nara was intelligent. The idea that the seal could be weakening after all this time frightened Gaara. But it had been two years since the incident in the wind shrine and despite the occasional moments when Shukaku did indeed gain some motor control over Gaara, he had yet to actually attack anyone he considered an ally since Sakura.

' _Maybe that was just the beginning,'_ he thought.

He waited for the demon to respond, and sure enough, it growled out the words:

' **THE BEGINNING OF SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL YOU MEAN.'**

Gaara closed his eyes, sighing deeply. If only he could tear the demon out of him without dying, then it would be something beautiful.

"Gaara?"

Yamato's voice startled him, as though he'd forgotten he wasn't alone. Gaara's eyes snapped open violently, and he shook himself. He was definitely going to take the Hokage's advice. Shikamaru's theory made sense to him suddenly and he mentally slapped himself for not realising sooner. Two years ago, so much had happened, with the situation with Sakura and her Anbu escort, Temari breaking off her secret liaisons with Shikamaru and the beginning of Gaara's meditation techniques which had started out so successfully. That had also been about the same time Kankuro had stopped sleeping around and started taking women seriously enough to try for romance. He'd dated several times since then, but was currently single.

Gaara wanted desperately to tease him on this, but never found the right words. He was weird that way.

"Gaara?" Yamato repeated. "Are you okay?"

Gaara nodded. "It's about the Ame rogues, and… other things."

The Anbu nodded his head, understanding. It was also, even if only cryptically, about Sakura.

"Just don't break her heart," he said. "I don't think she could take it again, after Sasuke, and her short lived relationship with Naruto. She's stronger than most people realise of course, but after everything that has happened between the two of you, it would be hell on her if you…"

He trailed off, sighing heavily again. But they both knew what he'd meant. After raping Sakura, Gaara had somehow become a person she could see herself opening up to, as twisted as that sounded. He was telling him not to take advantage of her. Not to take advantage of the forgiveness she had given him. Rape victims rarely ever did this once they moved past the initial stages, and providing of course they realised that they themselves were not to blame for the actions of their attackers. Gaara was _extremely_ grateful that Sakura had forgiven him, and even more so that she was returning his affections. It was more than he could've hoped for, _hell_ , more than he deserved.

' _I should probably work on relieving my own guilt,'_ he thought, remembering that Sakura had told him more than once that it wasn't his fault, but Shukaku's.

It was more than anything (including using his chakra), the reason Shukaku could control him. Self imposed guilt was a strong leverage under any circumstance. He was so _stupid_ for not entertaining this idea sooner. Of course, Hana Kudamono, who had initially suggested his chakra was the conduit, had had no idea he had been feeling guilty for _anything_.

He sighed, refocusing his attention on the Anbu, who was staring at him oddly.

Yamato knew Gaara was not as easily scared as Naruto, but he put his best face on as he spoke dangerously, yet eerily calm to the Kazekage.

"Just keep that urge of Shukaku's in check, or there'll be _hell_ to pay."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	19. The Morning After.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes

– **Flashback –**

_They had been trekking through the desolate, rocky areas just past the border north of the land of birds for hours now; entering the land of earth and keeping to the mountain passes. The geography here was unique, with the famous phenomenon known as "Rock Rain" which amounted to small falling rocks carried by the wind, over the mountains and into neighbouring countries. It may have been a natural phenomenon, but it also aided in hiding an unnatural enemy._

_There was supposed to be an Akatsuki base here. At least, that was what the five Kages had been told._

_The group consisted of seven Anbu: three sand ninja and four from the leaf, headed by the Kazekage himself. He had insisted on personally overseeing this mission due to the fact that entering the Akatsuki base would require someone with the ability to manipulate grated earth. He had never tried to move rock before, but by using his sand to crush the stones blocking their path and creating more sand, he stood the greatest chance of perceiving the entrance to this place; with or without a little_ _ help _ _._

_Everyone knew Gaara was making the hunt for the Akatsuki personal; the damage that had been done to Suna had driven him to this. He even scared his siblings these days, like he used to when he was letting Shukaku manipulate him into killing people just for the sake of it. But he wasn't talking to "mother" this time. He was talking to himself. And despite his clearly biased reasons for taking the lead with the hunt for the Akatsuki, no-one had questioned his reasons for leading this recent mission._

_His sand abilities were indeed going to be very handy._

_Gaara came to a stop, the Anbu behind him obediently following suit. For years, master Jiraiya had had a spy in the Akatsuki: Itachi Uchiha. The information he'd provided the Sannin with was invaluable in Jiraiya's pursuit of the truth behind the organisation, but now, they had hit a dead end. The Uchiha had been killed by his sibling and Jiraiya was killed by Pein. Fortunately, another Shinobi had taken Itachi's place in the Akatsuki underground, though Hiko Takāshi was just a subordinate to the organisation and could only provide basic level intelligence._

_But he was all they had to work with now._

_Gaara cast his pale eyes out over the mountain range, looking for the signal he'd been told that Hiko would send to show where to go next. This was a delicate process, sneaking into potential Akatsuki territory. But with Hiko's help, the Kazekage hoped to enter unseen. He would never have gotten this close without the Iwagakure ninja's help of course. Hiko was doing this for master Jiraiya though, as apparently the Sannin had died while the Iwa ninja still owed him a life debt._

_Gaara's head whipped around and he spotted a puff of light brown smoke that was barely distinguishable through the rock rain in the area. It was the signal alright. He took off again, the Anbu trailing soundlessly behind him, heading toward the smoke. The Kazekage felt excited, riveted even, by the possibility that they had indeed uncovered an active hideout. Hiko only knew that this one had had members in it two weeks ago, but there was no indication to current activity._

_Ignoring the small, falling rocks and high altitude, the joint group of leaf and sand ninja came to the peak of a foothill that was divided from a twin summit by a crag that had clearly been pried apart using chakra. There were definitely Iwagakure ninjas in league with the Akatsuki. Or at least low level subordinates that had learnt some earth jutsu. That_ _ freak _ _Deidara, had turned out to have been from Iwa._

_Gaara pushed aside the rising anger inside of him, preferring to direct it toward efforts that are more constructive._

_He looked around; from the wisps of clouds above their heads to the way the light brown smoke that had somehow disappeared from view the closer the group had gotten to it. One of the Suna Anbu shifted slightly, obviously concerned, but the Kazekage ignored him. Gaara was not worried that this was some kind of trap; after all, Hiko had no idea the Kazekage was personally overseeing this mission, so how could anyone inside Akatsuki know? That was assuming they didn't care who was coming, only that someone_ _ was _ _; Gaara didn't want to contemplate the idea of_ _ them _ _having a spy, when the Kages had agreed to plant a spy in_ _ their _ _lower ranks._

_It was too horrifying to contemplate._

_Thankfully, Hiko Takāshi appeared a moment later, his eyes widening at the sight of the Kazekage. His short dark hair was messy and he wore servant clothes._

" _K-Kazekage-sama?" Hiko asked. "It is too dangerous for_ _you_ _to have come here. What if there is someone home and they try to take you?"_

" _So there_ _is_ _a base here?" Gaara asked, jumping into the alcove where Hiko had appeared and ignoring his comment._

_Hiko nodded silently, still stunned by the Kazekage's presence. The Anbu readied themselves behind Gaara. They were anticipating traps once the hideout's perimeter was breached. It was their job after all._

_Gaara looked over the alcove, raking the uneven surface with his eyes. It had definitely been made using some kind of jutsu. Rock did not form like this naturally. There were no impact craters from nearby falling rock rain, as there should have been; this natural phenomenon was responsible for the wear and tear of much of this region, as well as nearby countries. But this alcove was suspiciously clean of debris. It_ _ had _ _to have been formed by chakra. There was no other explanation._

_Realising that the Kazekage wasn't going to be answering him anytime soon, Hiko bowed respectfully to him._

" _Yes Hokage-sama," he said reluctantly. "But I have not seen anyone here since I arrived. I discovered the scrolls on this place by chance perhaps, but we cannot rule out the idea that they have anticipated someone might come. By now they would have realised the scrolls are missing."_

_Gaara nodded. "What do you know about this place?"_

" _An Akatsuki subordinate runs this hideout," Hiko said, trembling slightly. "I hear he trained in Iwagakure Kazekage-sama."_

" _What is his name?"_

_The Shinobi cowered under the intense gaze, his hands fumbling as he lowered his eyes under the Kazekage's intense gaze._

" _H-his name is Ouden Tashimaru, K-kazekage-sama,"_

" _Hiko-san," Gaara said, trying to make his voice soothing, though he still sounded slightly annoyed. "I am not going to kill you: calm down."_

_He understood though; rumour had it that the Kazekage was more reminiscent of his old self these days, and the fear of an unstable jinchuriki was a powerful thing. It was Gaara's fault of course, as he was letting his anger and desire for revenge against the Akatsuki overrule his usual, aloof manner. But he was hardly the monster that lied within him anymore. He didn't go around killing people for the sake of it anymore, and he certainly didn't have any particular_ _ need _ _to feed the blood of others to "mother", which he had known for some time now was actually Shukaku. The sand in his gourd no longer smelt like blood and the title of Kazekage was not just for show._

_He_ _ cared _ _about his people. He cared about others now, so it was an unfair assumption that he'd reverted into the heartless monster within him._

_Gaara ignored Hiko, now moving closer to the entrance the spy was pointing out. There was a distant rumble, not unlike thunder, but not natural. He hesitated, listening intently. It was a full ten seconds before he realised that the base was self-destructing._

' _Before we've even set foot inside?_ _'_

– **End Flashback –**

Gaara saw Yamato off, which just amounted to opening and closing the front door for him. He was surprised by the ease with which the older man spoke to him, despite that final, dangerous, yet eerily calm tone to his voice when he'd warned him to keep Shukaku in check. He saw now why Naruto was so easily freaked by him. It hadn't shown on Gaara's face, but he'd found his words nerve-racking.

He returned to his bedroom to find that Sakura was still fast asleep. The sun had risen while the Kazekage had been speaking with Yamato, but the burnt orange still tinted the horizon so he decided it was too early to head over to the main Kazekage building just yet. He still had a few hours before the council would be sending tracking units after him.

He inwardly chuckled at this and climbed in next to Sakura, having removed his clothes. He felt weird, taking his clothes back off again and throwing the sheets back over his body. It was his own lack of experience in this sort of situation, so he just shrugged the strange feeling away and pulled the pinkette toward him. She had rolled away from his side, her back to him. He gripped her securely, but not tightly, pressing her skin to his and closing his eyes. He waited patiently for her to wake up.

Gaara's thoughts went to Naruto, and the inevitable confrontation between them. He mused on the best way to approach the blonde without earning himself a unprompted sparring lesson, where Naruto had no qualms about harming him _seriously_. His fellow jinchuriki was unpredictable, so the belief went, but if one were to assume he was always bound to do something incredibly impulsive or ridiculously careless, one could then say he was completely predictable. After having known Naruto for so long, Gaara knew what kind of reception he was going to get. It was inevitable.

"Mmm…"

Sakura stirred, her first feeling being content and sleepy, the second sensation being of the strong arms wrapped around her naked form, along with the feel of his body pressed against hers. She blushed heavily when she realised also, that she was the last to wake. Gaara's hot breath was on her earlobe and she giggled, unable to stop herself.

"Gaara," she roused playfully. "Stop that."

He blew onto her again, his lips brushing her skin; she trembled involuntarily.

"I'm not doing anything," he stated.

He felt something in his stomach stir, and realised the scent of her, coupled with the slight vibrations of her body against his as she reacted to his teasing was making him hard again. Gaara wasn't the only one to feel this; Sakura squirmed in his arms, rolling over to face him. He kept her close as she stared into his eyes.

"Gaara…"

She whispered this softly before capturing his lips. Sakura wriggled her left arm out of his grip and reached up toward him, pulling herself to level with his face. Gaara took this as permission, lifted her left leg up, snaking it over his hip, and tugged on her knee; her breasts pressed against his toned chest. Sakura bit his bottom lip, a throaty moan escaping her lips as he pushed into her. She wasn't entirely ready for the intrusion, her inner thighs stinging a little, but he stilled, waiting as she wrestled his tongue with hers.

The warmth of his penetration contracted her walls, and after a moment, Sakura took the initiative and started moving first, her left leg squeezing his thigh at the same time. Gaara gripped her tightly, moving with her thrusts, and then quickened his pace to take control of the momentum. The pinkette protested verbally, growling into his mouth as he half lifted her body, pulling out of her, and then slammed back in. She moaned, making him chuckle softly.

Every sound she emitted only drove him faster, and Gaara could hardly believe his own daring when he broke the kiss to murmur in her ear. At the sound of his sexually laced words, the pinkette moaned again, her face turning beet red. To hide her embarrassment, she pulled him back into the kiss and pushed against the Kazekage, rolling him onto his back. But he was still in control, his hands grasping her thighs, slamming her down onto him. She could only hold on for dear life as every thrust spurred the red head on, until finally, he pushed her over the edge.

Finally breaking the kiss, Sakura threw her head back and cried out as Gaara came into her and she released her own orgasm, utterly spent. The pinkette growled.

" _Fuck_."

She rolled off of him as Gaara smiled slightly, surprised by how natural she sounded, cussing. Sakura cuddled up to him, noticing the morning was getting on a bit. It wasn't too late though, and she settled next to the Kazekage, aware however, that _he_ was supposed to be somewhere right now. But neither of them _cared_.

It was a few minutes after they'd both come down from their high before Gaara thought it safe to mention Naruto Uzumaki. He wanted to talk to him, but Sakura was terrified of that.

"He's angry," she said. "Just let him cool down."

Gaara didn't think that was likely to happen any time soon.

"At least let me come with you," Sakura said, correctly interpreting the look on his face, "so he doesn't attack you Gaara."

He sighed, shaking his head. "I will talk to Naruto, alone."

Even though he knew it was like signing his own death certificate.

X X X

Hana Kudamono wasn't supposed to come in until ten o'clock, but instead, arrived early for her shift at the Suna Medical Core, eager to get started for the day, as she knew Sakura Haruno was back in the village. Her long dark brown hair was tied back into a bun today, and she held herself with what she decided was confident dignity. She hoped that Sakura would have more time during this trip to work with her in the hospital. Every time the pinkette stayed and helped out, the brunette learnt more and more, faster and faster than when she asked Shima Katsunohu to help her.

She blushed at that. Hana knew her fascination for the pink haired Kunoichi was something akin to a girl-crush, but it was Shima she really liked, that way. She blushed even deeper, reminding and scolding herself at the same time that Shima was in his late twenties and wouldn't be interested in a girl like her.

The head doctor had the day off and Shima was in charge until he came back. He was the second cousin of Itsumo Nashika, who in turn was the grandfather of Honshu Uzunara. Honshu was more of a klutz than Hana and she disliked him thoroughly. He didn't take his medic duties seriously and was forever making mistakes. He was only still in the medical core because of his grandfather, the head doctor.

"Ah, Hana-san," the voice belonged to Shima, of course.

Hana brushed profusely, managing not to stutter of course. "Please, call me Hana, Shima-Sensei." (The suffix can be attached to doctors, as well as teachers, and other authority figures.)

"Then you can just call me Shima," he said, smiling.

Shima Katsunohu was one of the doctors on call two years ago, when the Kazekage had brought back the leaf ninja attacked by rogues. Hana remembered this, because it had been her birthday, and instead of taking the day off, she'd spent it instead tending to Sakura and the Anbu named Tonetsu. She had wanted to do this, because it was Sakura Haruno, the apprentice to the only female member of the legendary Sannin.

"Hai, Shima-Sensei."

Shima sighed. "Did you see Honshu on your way in?"

Hana scowled. "He's probably still asleep."

"He rises early sometimes."

"Itsumo should appoint _you_ head doctor," Hana told Shima suddenly. "You're capable and respected."

Shima just stared at her, confused. He wasn't at that level, didn't she realise?

He was spared from having to question her when a raggedy looking excuse for a medic came strolling in the front doors of the Suna Medical Core. Hana may not have been a fan of Honshu Uzunara, but they did have one thing in common: respect for Sakura Haruno. Honestly, Shima didn't know anyone who didn't. It made her sound like some kind of mary-sue, the way the medical community, regardless of village, looked up to her. But with Lady Tsunade having passed away, the pinkette was the focus of said community. People were looking to her to not only outshine her shishou (as she had already done), but raise the bar, so to speak.

"Got any aspirin?" Honshu asked, blinking heavily at Shima and ignoring Hana.

They did this to each other all the time. Hana was only sixteen, so Honshu didn't respect her – he was almost thirty years old, but didn't act his age. Shima personally, thought he acted younger than the female medic.

"No," Shima said. "Why don't you just heal your headache? Or did you use up your chakra doing something else last night?"

Honshu grunted, but then brightened suddenly. "Lady Haruno!"

The pinkette had wandered over to the medical core, avoiding her friends, knowing Ino would soon find her anyway, and not wanting to deal with Naruto right now. She silently promised herself to _kill_ him if he attacked Gaara.

Sakura smiled at Honshu. "Uzunara-san, how are you this morning?"

She remembered him of course. He was Shima's apprentice, despite the fact that they were family… barely. He was also a low rate medical ninja, with no love for the profession. It had been forced on him by his grandfather. Which would explain why he was so bitter to a lot of people here.

His smiled wavered at her informal address of him, using the surname of his late mother. He didn't like it that much.

"I am fine Sakura-sama," he said, and it was the pinkette's turn to be annoyed. She disliked that honorific. It made her feel old.

Honshu grinned suddenly. "I have a hangover, so I'd be more than appreciative if you'd take me into an empty examination and give me a check up."

His voice was cheeky, his expression suggestive and he didn't duck in time to avoid a smack over the back of his head from Shima. Sakura giggled.

"I'm afraid I'll have to decline," she said, ignoring the furious glare Hana was sending his way.

Shima rolled his eyes. "Out of here. You have duties to perform that you're already late for."

"Well," Honshu said, winking at Sakura, "if you change your mind, I'll be in my office."

Shima smacked him over the back of the head, _again_. "You mean you'll be in _my_ office, cleaning up the mess you made there the last time, right?"

Sakura chuckled as Honshu rubbed his head and smirked.

"Right," he said and took off.

"What did he do?" The pinkette asked.

"Mistook my office for the morgue."

Hana giggled now, her anger evaporating at the disappearance of Honshu. This drew the attention of the two superior medics in her company; she profusely apologised and dashed away.

"That's another one with their head in the clouds." Sakura waved to Shima and followed the brunette girl.

The young woman was indeed a bit ditsy, but unlike Honshu, she actually showed promise. Sakura shook her head, thinking about Gaara as she entered the small examination room that was always set up for her when she visited. She decided, on the Kazekage's advice, to stay here for awhile, at least until after he'd spoken with Naruto.

Maybe it wasn't such a good thing after all, letting Gaara head over to talk to Naruto on his own. But she was confident in the red head's ability to pacify the situation, even if the blonde was a _baka_. She just hoped that as a medic, she wasn't the one who had to put them both back together. She wanted Naruto to understand it wasn't Gaara's fault, but he had given no indication to her that he wasn't going to attack the red head. He was eerily secretive on the matter, during the three day trip back to Suna.

That scared her more than anything, that those two may never be close again. Gaara had been like a brother to Naruto over the past four years.

' _Until I ruined it,'_ she thought to herself, not bothering to scold herself for feeling guilty.

No matter how Gaara, or Shukaku really, had actually managed to rape her, she would never forgive herself if that act had permanently severed Naruto's respect for Gaara. For years, he'd been so focused on getting Sasuke back into the leaf, and when that failed, the blonde had stopped thinking no-one was beyond redemption. Sakura didn't want to be responsible for Naruto giving up on everyone, forever.

' **Dramatic much?'** Inner Sakura scolded her. **'Don't count either of them out yet.'**

She was right, that crazy, inner voice. Sakura sighed and Hana entered the room, looked hastily around for her cubicle, as though she'd gotten lost on her way here, and moved into it. The pinkette stared at her for a moment, and then turned away from Hana, who was having trouble concentrating on her work, what with the mere presence of her idol distracting her. The girl needed to focus more and stop daydreaming.

Sometime later, Sakura had just left the room, remembering she had yet to eat anything, when an explosion rang in her ears. For a few seconds she didn't move, listening to the sounds of Hana's startled "oh... oomph", as she reacted to the blast, and then ran out of the hospital. It had come from the direction where she _knew_ Gaara had gone to find Naruto.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	20. Confrontations.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

Gaara went into his office to tell his secretary to take the rest of the day off and took home the paperwork that couldn't wait to be finished. He had already come in late, so there was no excuse not to get started on the important scrolls at least. The rest of the documents could wait. He finished quickly, his desire to get out of the house and find Naruto making him skim through the details and just approve what he knew he wouldn't be probed about later. A feeling of urgency not connected to his need to speak with his fellow jinchuriki was twisting up his stomach. It had started shortly after Sakura left his home to spend a few hours at the hospital.

And somehow, it felt… familiar.

The leaf ninja sent to Suna were expected back in the council room this afternoon, leaving all morning for them to sightsee and train. Or whatever tickled their fancy. Gaara had no intention of asking more of them than what was stipulated in their agreement. But he knew that it wouldn't be long before they started wanting to do more constructive things with their time. Not to mention that Ino at least, would be rushing to go see Sakura, guessing the pinkette would be in the hospital by now.

The Kazekage thought on Shikamaru, hoping the Nara was spending time with Temari. They really _did_ look good together. He sighed and left his home, making sure to bring his gourd with him as he did so. He started to feel through the village using his sand, searching for Naruto's unique chakra signature, but he needn't have bothered. The blonde was searching for _him_ as well.

Gaara deliberately changed the direction he was walking in when he sensed Naruto following him. He instinctively headed toward the abandoned building which had now completely collapsed under Sakura's powerful fists. He had almost raped her again, in here, but returning to the scene of his first crime, while in Sakura's arms, had gone over well enough. The guilt still weighed on him, but he would no longer let it control him. He had had too much of that for one lifetime.

As soon as Gaara had led the Kyuubi container to a relatively empty area (several businesses were nearby, like one of the entrances to the Suna prison, as well as a long walkway that led directly to the medical core), Naruto leapt out of the shadows.

"Multi shadow clone jutsu!"

The sound of Naruto's voice seemed to radiate from everywhere however, and Gaara spun around as his sand flew up to protect him. The multitude of kage bunshin hurled themselves at him one by one, each one slamming into his protective armour; hitting the same spot over and over. He was attacking him seriously, but they weren't coming very fast – only fast enough to keep the Kazekage on his toes. This made Gaara uneasy. Naruto was quicker than this.

He got his answer a moment later when a flurry of yellow (probably from his hair) passed in front of Gaara's eyes, quicker than the sand could follow. It had just been a distraction. Even angry enough to try to take down an ally, Naruto was still thinking it through.

Not able to rely on his shield, Gaara threw up his arms to block Naruto's blow, but the blonde was being devious again. One fist slammed into Gaara's crossed arms, while the other came at him in an uppercut to the stomach. The Kazekage grunted at the impact, moving his arms to grip Naruto's, and caught a hold of his wrists. They wrestled each other for a moment, Naruto growling like an angry fox the entire time, and finally Gaara could only break the struggle by twisting the blonde's wrist, almost breaking it.

Naruto let go of him, jumped backward, and narrowed his eyes at his fellow jinchuriki. Gaara wondered what was going on behind those red eyes, ignoring the way they reminded him of the Sharingan. It was creepy: those red eyes always unnerved Gaara, and he avoided the blonde's gaze as his fellow jinchuriki attacked again. His feral expression tore at the red head, making him want to hide himself, or at least let the earth open up and swallow him. He hated seeing that grief driven anger on anyone's face, let alone someone he considered to be as good as family.

Naruto, for his own part, was having trouble controlling his desire to _kill_ Gaara. He'd woken up this morning after dreaming about him and Sakura, wanting to kill him, but telling himself it would do no good. He'd struggled with the decision to attack him, make him bleed a little maybe, and see how he liked being the victim. The last two years were suddenly so clear to the blonde; he had watched his best friend, unaware of her pain, and struggled to understand why she kept him at arm's length. He even went through a stage where he believed _he'd_ done something to piss her off and spent nights tossing and turning, unable to sleep. He had even cried over the distance between them. It felt so surreal now, knowing what had caused this.

But Sakura's claims that it had been Shukaku meant almost nothing to the blonde, and he growled again, glaring at Gaara and letting his fury take over.

' _Better that than my tears.'_

"Gaara!"

He pounced again, feeling the red chakra surge inside of him, but not giving it quarter to take him over. He would use what he needed to, but he would not risk burning down all of Suna in the process. Naruto ran at Gaara, his fists a barrage of blows, pounding on the defensive posture the red head was holding up, again. His arms bore the brunt, but it wasn't hurting him. The blonde jumped away again, but immediately pivoted and struck out with his foot, moving faster than the sand shield could. This forced Gaara to duck and weave again, moving out of the close quarters combat he disliked. Naruto was capable of so much more than this, whether or not he was clearly blinded by his anger.

But Gaara obliged him anyway, deciding this was probably good for the knucklehead, to vent his anger.

The Kazekage manipulated his sand, moving the shield around his body to create a shifting circle around himself without forming his ultimate defence. Without words, they both agreed, staring into each other's eyes, that this was inevitable. Gaara had _raped_ Sakura, someone Naruto held dearer to himself than even his own life. But the Kazekage, regardless of any fault, was not going to just stand there and let his fellow jinchuriki beat him half to death.

Not now, not ever.

Naruto created his shadow clones again; four in total who all began powering up their Rasengan at the same time. The Kazekage repositioned himself, summoning sand from the ground to aid the grated earth already protecting his body. Naruto knew his friend's attacks, and Gaara knew the blonde's moves very well also.

The four shadow clones came at him again, but Gaara did not try to evade them. He threw out jets of sand, his aim true as he dispelled them. Wary of the dispersing cloud created by the clones, Gaara jumped out of the way this time as the real Naruto leapt through the cloud, trying to take him by surprise. He failed, missing the Kazekage, but repositioning midflight to aim a kick, again able to get past the sand shield.

Gaara was okay in close quarters but it wasn't his strong point. He managed to brush aside the kick though, and swivelled out of the way to avoid an anger fuelled punch from the blonde. The red head jumped away from him, landing lithely, but looking up in fear as the earth shook beneath him.

The explosion tore them away from each other. Naruto hissed softly and looked around, realising he no longer had the Kazekage's full attention. Gaara's face mirrored the anguish that the blonde was feeling. Like the _baka_ he was, Naruto took a few moments to realise that neither him nor Gaara had caused that explosion.

The feel of the ground tremors caused by the explosion reminded Gaara of another one that had happened four years ago.

– **Flashback –**

_Jets of sand spun and lashed out, flying between buildings, screeching through the air; and intent on their target. The Kazekage was his own brand of puppet master, manipulating the torrent of sand, and using said weapon of choice to chase the blonde haired Akatsuki member through the village, like a well rehearsed dance. The grated earth almost seemed to have a mind of its own to an uninformed onlooker, separate from the control of Gaara Sabaku. He weaved his weapon effortlessly, driving the enemy into the sky once more as the blonde avoided two more incoming streams._

_Outflanked the Akatsuki was forced into the open, the clay bird he rode on rising higher into the sky and out of reach of the innocent people Gaara had sworn to protect. Rising higher and faster now, the streams of sand seemed unstoppable in their chase; swirling around the Kazekage, this was only the beginning of what the young man could do._

_Gaara stared dispassionately up at the blonde Akatsuki, who sneered back at him. The rogue Shinobi was impressed, talking to himself as Gaara kept the sand coming. Changing his stance and hand movements, the Kazekage drew the three streams of sand together, fusing them into one single torrent, continuing the barrage of his attacks._

_It was his turn to defy gravity._

_Gaara pushed himself off of the ground using the combined force of his chakra, and the moment of the sand he sent flying upward to carry him toward his opponent. Although he'd spent the battle silent, only initially uttering, "that's as far as you go" to the blonde on the rooftop, Gaara's mind was on overdrive. How seemingly coincidental was it, that he had recently spoken with his council on the topic of the Akatsuki, when a member of said organisation suddenly decides to infiltrate the village._

_These vermin travelled in pairs, supposedly, so the young Kazekage wondered where the partner to this blonde had stashed himself. The hiding Akatsuki had yet to show his face, so the red head decided to deal with them one at a time._

_Gaara moved the sand platform he'd jumped onto higher, to level with his opponent. As long as he could control it, there was no way it was going to give out from underneath him; gravity be dammed._

_Sand was his ally, everybody knew that. But these same people were always surprised when he wielded it so easily. Suna was strong, the buildings sturdy and built on firm and stable ground. But between the buildings there were small apertures; here, subterranean supplies of earth just waited for a sand user to take advantage of them. They had been strategically placed over the last six months, and served as a source for the Kazekage if he were ever forced to fight an opponent as formidable as the Akatsuki._

_But only a select few knew about it: Temari, Kankuro, Baki and a few of Gaara's most trustworthy of subordinates. So no matter how much this Akatsuki member might know about the Kazekage and his abilities, it was safe to assume he didn't know about this._

_So, after explaining to the Akatsuki member how he'd realised there was an intruder, Gaara made the first attack for their second round._

_Sand geysers rose out of the ground beneath the two Shinobi. They lifted into the air, coming from the multiple, and now formerly hidden openings that had been made to accommodate them. All of Suna watched as this rain of sand soared to the sky, reaching out, fusing together, and forming a tidal wave._

_More talking to himself._

_Gaara couldn't hear what he was saying, but the Akatsuki member seemed absorbed in whatever he was mumbling about. Really, he didn't care. He channelled his chakra through the sand once more, hardening the minerals and forming replicas of Shukaku's arms as he attacked. The blonde was hard pressed to avoid these attacks and couldn't get close to the Kazekage._

_This was where the pace seemed to shift suddenly._

_Gaara had only a second to register before the miniature clay birds flocked around him. He consciously pushed his sand shield outward as it came up to protect him and after the mini explosions, the large version of Shukaku's arms attacked again. He had the geographical advantage, as well as power, but Gaara wasn't fast enough to grab the clay bird and its rider. He decided instead to herd him._

" _The real fun's about to begin," the bomber chuckled._

_He threw out more miniature clay birds and as he dodged the Shukaku shaped arms, he didn't notice the formation of hardened grains of sand on his ride. Gaara may have missed the bomber in his attempts to grab him with the arms, but he put that failure to good use and broke off smaller portions of the underside of the hands. These almost microscopic particles went unnoticed by the blonde as he attacked the arms, drawing closer to the Kazekage._

' _So that's your plan_ _,' Gaara thought, choosing to evade the explosive clay birds rather than rely on his sand shield._

_There was no point in making himself an easy target after all. The continuous explosions from the miniature birds tore through one of the Shukaku arms, but Gaara wasn't worried about that. These explosive devices did bother him though, and he couldn't help the soft expression of annoyance that crossed his face. It was getting to become a nuisance._

_Higher and higher the blonde went, avoiding the final Shukaku arm, grunting as more jets of sand joined in on the chase. Gaara's face was expressionless, as always, but he was feeling so much better now, knowing his plan was bearing fruit. He moved his stationery sand platform to rise with the bomber, but stayed lower and away from him, to avoid what he knew was coming._

_He closed his eyes, manipulating the sand on instinct alone for a few seconds to concentrate on the wayward sand that had been burrowing through its target. It was infused with his chakra, so he could manipulate it even further, hardening the mineral; the grains combining became as sharp as steel._

_Gaara snapped his eyes open in time to avoid another miniature clay bird explosion, his sand tsunami rising higher to trap the bomber as he tried to avoid the Kazekage's attacks on several fronts. It was pointless. Gaara moved the sand that was burrowing through the large bird the Akatsuki was riding, tearing the clay a part as it went. It was just baked, earthy minerals after all. Even the hydrated aluminium silicates (plastic) used in more refined versions, were still just earth. He was more than capable of cutting right through that, even if this clay was more dense and chakra infused._

_He had to admire the craftsmanship though._

_The blonde grunted, the clay bird falling from underneath him and ripping into several sections. He couldn't hold onto it and looked down, realising how high he had actually been. Suna looked so small beneath him. The man whose name escaped Gaara gave a grunt-like scream as he fell. The Kazekage gathered up his sand, trying to move it out of the way as the bomber plunged toward the masonry buildings. He could grab the man by the ankles, slam him into the ground to avoid hitting the buildings, but he suddenly didn't care to try._

_Instead, he moved to return the sand he'd taken from the ground to a safer area, his eyes on the Akatsuki member as he fell. That wasn't his first mistake._

_The blonde seemed to fall in slow motion as the people miles below him watched his descent in sickened fascination. A feeling of urgency was twisting up Gaara's stomach as he realised too late what the bomber was doing. It was his last ditch attempt to take this wretched village with him, swallowing a small doll moulded from detonating clay; he called it C-3: the most powerful chakra he possessed._

_But no-one knew that but him._

_Gaara watched, his eyes widening as he realised that he shouldn't have move the sand from his tsunami out of the way before the Akatsuki member was definitely dead. The body of the blonde expanded just before it hit the roof of a government building, and he exploded. The resulting detonation ripped through the heart of Sunagakure, as terrifying as the piercing screams that followed._

– **End Flashback –**

X X X

Frozen for only a moment, Gaara shook himself, ignoring the worst case scenarios that flitted about in his head. Forgetting the angry Naruto Uzumaki standing only a foot away from him, the Kazekage took off, heading toward the explosion. Normal people ran in the opposite direction from the eruption of high explosives, but Gaara was far from normal. And the last time something had detonated inside Suna at a level even remotely like this one, it had been devastating to the sand.

The worst case scenarios cropped up again and he couldn't help the images that come to him then. The fallout from Deidara's explosion: the sounds of people screaming overwhelmed by the discovery of the bodies of men, women, and children alike. Gaara could still remember to this day what his beloved village looked like in the moments after the dust from the self-destruct had settled. The horror was unimaginable. The next three days were the worst in his entire life, which was saying something, considering his history. He'd felt like he'd failed them, each and every villager, ninja or civilian.

But things had improved once the leaf ninja arrived and both the rescue teams and the hospital infirmary were assisted by their allies. They'd been under staffed, which wouldn't normally have happened, but did because the casualties were not limited by their profession. The walking wounded forced themselves to help, despite their inability to do anything too arduous, but the number of people dead or injured outnumbered those who were of any real use.

But this explosion had been centred in one place: the Suna prison.

When he arrived, Gaara couldn't see through the smoke, but he heard his ex-Sensei's voice, and immediately called out for Baki.

A shockwave from the initial blast shook the structure of the prison and set off secondary, but comparatively minute explosions; Baki managed to grab the men closest to him and jump up and through the now shattered roof to safety. He growled at this. He carried two under his arms, but there had been half a dozen Shinobi with him in that room.

"Baki," Gaara said in his calmest voice. "What has happened?"

The older man coughed slightly. "The epicentre of the explosion was in the lower levels, in the high priority prisoner cells. But before I could investigate it, shockwaves took out the stairs and passages leading down there."

He swallowed heavily. "The entire lower levels have been cut off from the outside."

"The outside?" Gaara asked, suddenly aware that Naruto had followed him.

The blonde looked worse for wear, struggling with something both mentally and physically as he came up to stand next to Gaara, and Baki suddenly realised his Kazekage was breathing a little heavier than usual as well. He opened his mouth to ask him if he was okay, but Naruto cut him off.

"What the hell happened?"

"It didn't feel like paper bombs," Baki said calmly. "But it was definitely some kind of jutsu."

He caught the Kazekage's gaze. "Perhaps something moulded from clay and infused with chakra."

Baki was just guessing of course, as it was the only thing he could think of. There was no proof. As Gaara stiffened at the news, Naruto looked confused and the two Shinobi Baki had rescued were out of breath, sitting on the ground.

Gaara pushed past Baki and moved toward the prison entrance. He was trembling inside; his fears of exploding devices having manifested over the years, though diminished as of late, were fighting his desire to clear away the rubble that had been caused by the explosion. He couldn't believe this had happened _again_ , his mind reeling as he tried to figure out _how_ it had happened. Was it the Amegakure rogues, or someone in league with them? He looked into the uninviting depth of the half collapsed building that looked ready to implode any second. There was no obvious movement coming from inside. He shook himself; first things first. The two Shinobi on the ground stood shakily as their Kazekage addressed them.

"Put together two squads to assist with the clearing and rescue, and then inform the council of what has happened here."

"Yes sir."

They sped off and Naruto glanced at Baki.

"You're hurt," he said softly.

The older man realised he was indeed bleeding, and Baki grunted, holding his side and ignoring the throbbing pain.

"The explosion wasn't the result of faulty electricity or an accident with exploding tags," he said unnecessarily. "Security is too tight for it to have been done by a prisoner."

Gaara nodded, not wanting to voice the thought they were both having, but doing it anyway. "That means this was deliberate. And the only reason I can think of, is there's a spy in Suna."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	21. As The Dust Clears.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

Sakura Haruno had always had this vision in her head. It involved her and Sasuke Uchiha, walking down the aisle amidst cheers and congratulations. Coupled with the _very_ visual image of herself doing naughty, pornographic things to him, it was no wonder her "inner" was even crazier than she was. At least she could laugh about it now. Gone were the days in which Sasuke had plagued her thoughts, escalating the already present thought in her head that she did not deserve to be loved, with every failed attempt she made to try to save him.

Sakura wanted to save everyone precious to her, someone who would actually do the same for her.

The explosion brought back dark memories. Memories of the last invasion attempt on Konoha. That had resulted in a series of mini-explosions and shockwaves that went on for hours. It wasn't something she'd been expecting to hear or feel inside of Suna however, even after the Akatsuki's failed attempt to snatch Gaara away. That had been a onetime explosion. _This_ however, was more like an earthquake, and sent ripples of shockwaves throughout the village, much like the ones in Konoha had.

Running from the hospital, Sakura knew that this wasn't like four years ago: not the attack on Suna, nor the one on Konoha almost six months later. This was not an invasion. She slowed her pace as she approached the prison, noting the figures that stood outside of it.

Baki was off to the right, ordering about some sand Shinobi, while Naruto was fidgeting, checking out the damage on one side (finally useful: she inwardly giggled at this thought). Gaara stood near the walkway that led toward an open area he used to visit a lot as a child. He was staring past it, deep in thought: she hesitated to interrupt him. He looked so forlorn, but thoughtful at the same time. Her heart skipped a beat as she walked slowly up to him. The pinkette glanced at the blonde, then turned to the Kazekage and tapped his shoulder gently.

"Gaara?"

The eyes of both Gaara and Naruto gravitated toward the pinkette and she _felt_ the tension in the air. Suddenly, she _knew_ that they had recently been fighting. Chalk it up to her instincts or her medical observations. Both were clearly caught up in this recent development, but the moment Sakura spoke, something felt _off_ with them, not to mention that Naruto's breathing suddenly quickened and his eyes narrowed as he surveyed her proximity to Gaara. The red head's heart raced slightly, but Sakura decided that was just normal upon seeing her.

' **Think a lot of yourself, don't ya pinky?'**

' _Fuck off.'_

She growled inwardly, but the internal battle registered on her face. Gaara glanced at Naruto and then proceeded to ignore the blonde.

"Sakura," he said, "are you okay?"

She nodded her head. "What's going on?"

"The upper levels are ready to be cleared," Baki came up to them, cutting off Sakura's questioning and addressing his Kazekage. "We're just looking for something to leverage the collapsed pillars to get under that."

"No need," Gaara said and walked away from his subordinate.

Baki nodded to Sakura and Naruto and they cleared the area. The intelligence operative called out in his booming voice for the other nearby Shinobi to move out of the way. It was interesting to Sakura, watching in fascination as Gaara used his sand to do something that an ordinary Shinobi might take an hour or more to do, just as safely. He moved the pillars with ease, taking great care not to let any of them fall in the vicinity of the prison. There was still hope that people were still alive under there. The pinkette had watched him move half of a crumbling building four years ago while waiting anxiously and ready to run into the rubble at a moment's notice. Her medical skills had been tested during those months and a part of her had admired how skilfully Gaara had handled the rescue and clean up.

' _Maybe I really_ _had_ _started to like him back then,'_ she thought.

But Sakura had still been hung up on Sasuke at that point, so she hadn't noticed her accelerated heartbeat at the sight of the Kazekage sweating under the harshness of the sun. No matter the season, Suna still had its hot days. The strain on Gaara, using his sand over and over, while stubbornly taking only stolen moments in which to pause, had earned him her eternal respect in the first day after arriving in Suna back then. Consciously however, she'd admitted to herself that it wasn't just the sun that was _hot_ that day.

Gaara finished what he was doing, and snapping out of her reverie, Sakura glanced sideways to notice that Naruto was looking at her oddly, even for him. Had he been staring at her this entire time?

"Yes Naruto?" She asked, as though not reading his mind.

She knew him well enough to know he was debating the meaning behind the fact that she'd been staring so intensely at Gaara. But she didn't want to have this conversation with him. She needed to get back to the hospital. She wanted to help, and it was the first thing that occurred to her she could do.

"Nothing," the blonde said haughtily, and turned away from her.

' **Naughty boy.'**

Sakura sighed and reached out to him to wipe at his shirt. "Are you going to be distant with me forever Naruto?"

He spun around to face her, pulled her closer to him, and lowered his voice so that only she could hear him.

"I'm trying to figure you out Sakura."

She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and whispered back. "You didn't attack him did you?"

Naruto snorted softly. "Of course I did."

She sighed… again. "You're a knucklehead, you know that, right?"

"Believe it."

She giggled. "Well at least you've got it out of your system now, and you're both still alive."

"Am I supposed to pretend that I don't want to kill him anymore?"

"For your own safety Naruto."

He sighed. "I love you Sakura, but I can't help how I feel."

"I know, but please, Naruto, let it go; at least for now. There are more important things going on right now."

Naruto pulled away from her as Gaara glanced over at them. "I promise Sakura."

The Kazekage spoke in whispers to Baki, who nodded and the red head moved toward Sakura.

"There are wounded ninja," he said to her. "Baki is about to pull them free. Can you–"

"Of course," she said, smiling at him. "You needn't ask."

Gaara spared her a faint smile and she took his hand, giving it an affectionate squeeze.

"This doesn't need your personal attention," Baki said to Gaara, coming up behind him. "And the council will be looking for you."

Gaara nodded, let go of Sakura's hand and, ignoring Naruto's intense gaze, shunshined away from the prison. Baki stepped away from the leaf ninja to organise the extraction of survivors. He understood the Kazekage's desire to be out here and help further, but he couldn't avoid the council forever.

X X X

Temari ran through the streets, heading toward the hospital. She'd just come from the council room and was furious. Someone had blown up the prison, there were people still in the rubble and the council wanted to put the entire village under martial law! What the _hell_ was that supposed to do? It was just the one building, away from the residential areas, hell, even too far from the rest of the official ninja controlled buildings. The logical course of action would be to sift through the rubble as quickly as possible and determine if anyone was missing. It would point them to the perpetrator without having to resort to martial law.

It was too much of a coincidence. Firstly, the escalating problems with the Amegakure rogues, then the prison explodes. It had been centred in the lower levels; the same level where the captured rogue was being held.

Temari decided to leave the council to Gaara, knowing he wouldn't be stupid enough to agree with them. She had another concern.

On her way to the bomb site, she'd heard that Baki had gone ahead and started to search for survivors anyway. A special Jounin she knew well told Temari that medics had been by the site and carried a handful of ninja away on stretchers. The blonde Kunoichi was terrified at the sound of this. She'd sent Matsuri Hamanaku to the prison over an hour before the explosion. She couldn't find her anywhere and _needed_ to see if the Chunin was in the hospital or not.

Concern tugged at her heart as she picked up the pace, bursting into the medical core building without hesitation. Temari looked around at the mess in the arrival area. Nobody here looked like they'd been in an explosion, but there were civilians and ninja alike that looked shaken up. Ignoring the half hearted glances, the blonde moved through the ground floor of the building, heading toward the emergency department. Surely someone there would know what was going on with the survivors rushed here only fifteen minutes ago.

Temari spotted Hana Kudamono a few minutes later and immediately strode up to the nurse.

"Hana," she said, accidentally startling the teenager. "Has a Chunin named Matsuri come in with the injured?"

Obediently, the brunette checked her clipboard, which seemed to hold a list of said injured.

She shook her head. "N-no Lady Temari."

"I can't find her," the Jounin said desperately. "Then I heard there were casualties…"

"Most of the injured are fine," Hana said carefully. "Your student wasn't among those brought in though."

"She's not my student."

Temari glanced toward the emergency room, concerned. If Matsuri wasn't here, then _where_ was she? She had _definitely_ been given the orders to help out with Baki's operation in the sub levels, so she should have been in the prison, or even just nearby. There was also the possibility that she was still there. The blonde trembled. That was _not_ a pleasant thought.

Honshu Uzunara, the oddball that was related to the head doctor, appeared next to Hana, much to the girl's irritation. He ignored her, glancing at Temari as he put his two yen's worth in.

"She's probably stalking the Kazekage or something. She's nuts like that."

" _Honshu_!" Hana snapped. "You shut your mouth!"

Temari glanced at the man. He was twenty-nine years old, tactless, and spent his time off work getting hammered. The head doctor wouldn't let him shirk his responsibilities. At least he wasn't allowed to tend to patients directly, let alone unassisted. Looking at him now, she could already see the baggy, bloodshot eyes that indicated he had a hangover. She didn't have time for this. She needed to make sure Matsuri was okay.

' _And I_ _need_ _to find Shikamaru.'_

He entered her mind, uninvited, as he had done four years ago when she first slowed down after Deidara's explosion. Temari had been on her way home when it happened, but something, call it a gut instinct, had driven her to travel as quickly as she could. She wasn't one to believe in omens, but there had been so many signs that hinted to her what had happened. Terror like nothing she'd ever felt before had taken a hold of her as soon as she'd seen what was left of her home. There were whole days when all she wanted to do was crawl into a ball and shut her eyes, hoping it was all a dream. But she was the sister of the Kazekage, and a respected Kunoichi: she would never allow anyone, ally or foe, see her cry.

Temari sighed and left the hospital, her thoughts now on Matsuri Hamanaku instead.

"Tactless freak," Hana murmured to Honshu before he scuttled off. Another nurse had just called him over.

"I don't suppose there's much use for me is there?"

Hana spun around to face a masked, Konoha Anbu. He had brown hair and an easy going stance. She smiled suddenly, at ease herself all of a sudden.

"I suppose not," she said. "But I heard the Kazekage is over at the bomb site before, maybe that's better suited to your talents."

Yamato nodded. He hadn't actually come here to get a crash course in medical ninjutsu. He had sent the other Anbu over to the bomb site, to whoever was in charge over there, thinking they might want to know the status of the people who had already been rushed here.

"Is there any news he should know?" He asked.

"You'll have to ask Shima-Sensei, as the head doctor isn't in today," Hana said, smiling. "He'll know what's going on."

"Right, I'll go see him then."

"He's not in the head doctor's office. I can show you where he'll be," she said almost tripping over herself.

He chuckled. "Lead the way."

Shima Katsunohu was just outside his office, talking in whispers with a Jounin medic. He looked up at the approach of Hana and the leaf Anbu. The brunette girl blushed slightly at the sight of Shima, as usual, and as usual, he pretended not to have noticed.

"Well well," he said, waving the Jounin medic away. "You here for a status report?"

Yamato nodded.

"Of course, of course. But it's merely preliminary. Give me another hour and I can have everything you need. It's probably Baki over there right now though, not the Kazekage. I heard he was in session with the council over what happened."

Yamato didn't respond outwardly, thinking Shima was probably right though.

"Not very talkative are you? You Anbu never are."

He hummed, moving back into his office as Hana gave the Anbu a weird look and the two followed.

"Okay," Shima said, rubbing the back of his head gently.

He wasn't exactly getting too old for this: but he _felt_ like he had crossed that threshold weeks back. Shima was twenty-seven going on fifty these days. The head doctor _had_ been piling a lot more on him than usual.

"Here it is." Shima handed Yamato a clipboard. "Do with it what you will."

Yamato nodded to him. "I will take this to Baki immediately."

The Anbu disappeared using Shunshin and Hana sighed.

"I can't wait until I can do that."

X X X

The last of the critical patients had been stabilised hours later, and finally, Sakura let out a raggedy breath. She was so exhausted, having ignored her stomach around lunch time when it growled at her. This was more important anyway, and she silently celebrated the victory. No-one who had so far been pulled alive from the rubble had died on the operating table. The pinkette was so relieved that she didn't notice at first that Hana was trying to get her attention. The girl was timid enough, did she have to become even more shy around _her_?

"Yes Hana?"

"There's one last patient. He's not in critical condition, but the other doctors are busy…"

She trailed off and Sakura sighed. "Show me his chart."

The patient was a fifteen year old Chunin, who had been on the upper levels, so escaped with only minor cuts and bruises. But he was complaining of a pain in his stomach that had started at the prison and even with the medication, wasn't easing up.

"Okay–"

"No you don't," Shima said, coming up behind a startled Hana. He ignored her reaction. "You need looking after too you know."

"I don't–"

"I'll deal with him," Shima said gently, taking the clipboard from her roughly to avoid her ninja reflexes. "You've already done more than necessary. Head out, eat something, and for Kami's sake _sleep_. You look like crap. Doctor's orders," he added cheekily when she moved to complain.

Defeated, Sakura only nodded her head before heading to the changing room and leaving the hospital. Another thing she needed was a shower. She hadn't been to the V.I.P suite that was normally set up for visiting ninja yet on this visit, so wasn't sure where was the best place to shower, there or Gaara's place. She'd spent the previous night in his bed, so the shower wasn't over stepping things, right? She grinned at that, but mentally slapped herself for the x-rated thoughts that entered her head. She decided to look for Ino, deciding to answer the growling of her stomach first. But the blonde was nowhere to be found.

Annoyed, Sakura went back to Gaara's place. She'd left her travelling bag there anyway; no need to take it all the way to the suite just to shower. But still, she felt weird, like she was receiving special treatment or something. And Ino was on her own, while Naruto had Shikamaru to bug, in their separate room.

' **So what? Fiddling with the Kazekage is more important.'**

She couldn't argue with that logic: crazy, mental logic. She was suddenly too hungry to care anyway.

So Sakura showered in Gaara's bathroom, left the mansion to get something to eat (the fridge in his kitchen didn't have anything she felt like eating), and found herself in a market district. The problems at the prison and the hospital were easing off, so she didn't have to feel guilty about indulging her sweet tooth. Having too many people there would just got in the way anyway. She perused the shops as she moved through, deciding to take her food "to go". It was keeping her mind preoccupied and off her desire to return to the hospital and see if there was anything else she could do to help.

Seriously, she wasn't the only medical ninja. She didn't have to take on more than her fair share. Spurred on by her new outlook, the pinkette didn't notice at first that she was receiving more than her fair share of stares.

' _I must be losing my mind, to keep missing things like this today.'_

There were a few children whispering and pointing at her, their curiosity evident in the widening of their eyes as she noticed them. Sakura looked around and caught a young man staring at her, his expression one of blatant shock. What was everyone's problem? Was it the pink hair?

Then Sakura remembered something, something that only an _idiot_ would forget. Over a week ago, rumours had started about her and the Kazekage, instigated by the two of them appearing out of thin air in the council room, their arms around each other. Where was her brain today? She hurriedly finished what she was doing and left the market district, heading back toward Gaara's mansion. Shima was right: she needed to sleep.

But under the covers, half naked and comfortable, the pinkette still couldn't sleep. So she climbed back out, redressed herself, and left again, fidgety. Sakura headed over toward the council building now, thinking to see if Gaara was finished. She was feeling so useless right now, wondering where Ino had gotten off to, if Naruto was still helping out at the bomb site, if Yamato or any of the Anbu were nearby, or if Shikamaru was in some open area, staring up at the clouds. She felt like _she_ was the lazy one, for not being in the hospital or at least off somewhere, doing something...

' _I need to do_ _something_ _!'_

At the entrance to the council building, she found the area oddly empty and _quiet_. Sakura entered, walking toward the council room with trepidation. It was closed, and there were no guards posted, but she sensed that they were inside. She could feel Gaara's chakra in there as well. This gave her something to do: she decided to sit out here and wait for him. He would know what was going to happen next, and she would be in the perfect position to be the first person to do _something_ about it.

Crazy, crazy…

An hour later, the doors opened and Gaara exited, alone. He looked slightly put out, but at the sight of the waiting pinkette, his expression softened.

"Sakura?"

She stood up rather painfully, realising she'd been sitting too long. She _hated_ just sitting around.

' _Seriously, what is wrong with me today?'_

' **You're fucked in the head.'**

' _Pfft!'_

' **Well you're not PMS'ing, so it has to be your lack of mental stability.'**

Sakura sighed loudly at that, ignoring the confusion on Gaara's face. Where was the stoic man she loved? She decided to fiddle with him, like her "inner" had suggested earlier. The pinkette closed the distance between them and wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing her body against his. The Kazekage immediately responded, his arms encircling her waist.

"Are you sure you're okay?" He asked, referring to his question earlier that day.

She nodded, running her hand up the back of his head, her eyes intense on his. Her mood had shifted again and suddenly, she was feeling extremely _horny_.

"Well maybe I need a release," she said cheekily. "One you'd be only too happy to provide, I'm sure."

She lifted her other hand to his face and pulled him down to her. The kiss was sensual, without going overboard, and a soft mewl from her mouth told Gaara she was just getting started. The sweetness of her touch, the way she reacted to his hand moving along her arse; it was all just a tease. He wanted to take her back to his place and tear her clothes from her body... right now.

"What the _fuck_?"

They broke apart at the sound, their hearts hammering in their ears louder now that the imaginary world where only they existed shattered around them. Sakura and Gaara looked over as Naruto gawked at them, not caring that they had been rudely interrupted. But it wasn't him who'd spoken: Baki and Kankuro were standing next to him. It was the older brother of the Kazekage who looked dumbstruck and affronted at the same time. He didn't get it. He rarely ever got anything. He hadn't heard the rumours, and had "conveniently" forgotten how cosy they'd looked appearing out of thin air in the council room over a week ago.

But to be fair, they hadn't been lip smacking then. He glanced at the two Shinobi on either side of him. Baki wasn't surprised, neither was Naruto… So who else knew?

And better yet, why did nobody ever tell _him_ these things?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	22. What's Really Important.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

The council was no longer in session, and those who had attended, as well as the ninja waiting for the result of the Kazekage's meeting with them, had left them be when they were informed of the decisions of Gaara Sabaku. He was grabbing the situation by the horns and there wasn't anything else to be done until the tracker squads Gaara sent out came back. Despite the fact that the prison had exploded and the tremor had been felt past the hospital and even by civilians, things were looking good. Everything but the search for the now confirmed missing Amegakure rogue was going back to normal. The explosion was just a distraction to facilitate the man's escape and only a select few now knew that someone outside the building had supplied the exploding tags.

Baki's initial assumptions had been incorrect: it had indeed been cause by paper bombs. But to be fair to the man, there had actually been a multitude of paper tags and they'd been arranged in such a manner that they not only exploded at the same time, but gave the false impression of emanating from a central point. The aftershocks of this kind of explosion were more consistent with the feel of the detonating clay used by Deidara four years ago. This in turn created a question: why would anyone blow up the prison in this way, let alone at all? Gaara's presumption of a spy was looking more and more plausible.

Shikamaru Nara mused on this as he wrote his letter to Kakashi Hatake, the sixth Hokage. It was now only half an hour on from Gaara's exit from the council chambers and upon finding Shikamaru, he had asked him to write a letter to Kakashi. It was best written by either the Kazekage or one of the visiting leaf ninja, and Gaara had a lot of paperwork to tend to. The lazy Jounin was suspicious that the red head was going to be finishing early in order to spend some extra time with a certain pinkette. After everything that had happened, he wasn't surprised that they wanted some comfort from each other.

The entire debacle back at Konoha, with Sakura confessing what had happened and Kakashi relaying it… well, Shikamaru didn't want to think about it anymore. It was horrifying enough, and more importantly, none of his business. They seemed to be dealing with it on their own, so he didn't even consider the idea of sticking his nose in Sakura's business with the Kazekage. He could see it on Gaara's face however, when the red head had tracked him down: Naruto had picked at him. The normally stoic Kazekage was a little more readable than usual, his emotions not as easily suppressed since the leaf ninja returned to Suna.

So that was another reason Shikamaru had decided not to say anything, not that he knew the right words anyway. Sakura was clearly smitten by Gaara, and whatever she had been through over the last two years was finally climaxing. She was taking the healthier option of trying to make good of her feelings. The lazy cloud watcher was envious. His own love life needed a pick me up as well.

"Shikamaru?"

Speaking of troublesome women.

"Temari," he said slowly, sitting up straight after realising he had been hunched over.

He had pulled up a chair in the Suna Aviary, away from prying eyes and on an unused table, to write his letter.

"How's it going?" She asked.

Shikamaru looked down at his letter. He was about two-thirds of the way through.

"Slowly," he said.

"Anything I can do to help?"

He patted the chair next to him and she sat down, her eyes glancing at him before settling on his tidy handwriting. He wasn't the type to be bothered with troublesome things like improving his literacy skills, but such things as this came naturally to him anyway, being such a genius. His handwriting always made Temari think of the elegant cursive writing one normally associated with love letters. Maybe she was just biased about it, having received more than a few from him in the past… when he could be bothered of course.

"You forgot to mention the squads that are searching for the Ame rogue," Temari said, having read the letter.

"Of course."

They sat in silence as he finished the letter. His mind remained on the task at hand while Temari occasionally interrupted his thoughts with a few of her own; they would glance at each other and a slight trembling of the blonde's hands drove her to take a time out to calm her nerves. Sitting this close to him wasn't unsettling, but it was making her feel strange. She recognised the feelings: they had never truly left her.

Shikamaru was finding it increasingly difficult to concentrate. Temari would lean over to point out a mistake or try to wrestle the pen from him and his eyes would dart briefly under her outstretched arm and down to her chest. Then, before she could notice and tease him, he would tear his eyes away and let out a frustrated groan at her cumbersome behaviour. They were both enjoying the banter.

Then it was complete and the repartee had come to an end.

"Here," she said, "let me do that."

Shikamaru brushed her hand as Temari took the scroll from him. She paused in the movement only minutely and proceeded to attach the level one emergency dispatch to Takamaru. It was encrypted for the cipher core but addressed to the Hokage. It was a good idea for both of them to sign their signatures on it. With Gaara busy and the rest of the leaf ninja otherwise occupied, it just seemed... _right_ that Shikamaru and Temari were the ones to do this.

Temari's hand trembled as she let go of the carrier bird and it took flight. Just the reminder of that earth shattering tremor brought back bad memories for her. Shikamaru had seen the fallout, four years ago, but only after most of the debris had been removed and when the buildings were already on their way to being reconstructed. He had been on a six week mission with Team Guy, and hadn't even known until after they returned, what had happened to Suna. His thoughts had immediately gone to Temari, then to the rest of Suna, prominently Gaara, and Kankuro after the troublesome blonde. His relief at hearing that she was alive was so overwhelming, he hadn't known whether to cry tears of joy or thank Kami. In the end he did both.

This tugged on him and he turned his head to realise that Temari was staring at him; their eyes locked and a silent understanding passed between them. They were both so tired of pretending, of having no hope and never looking at what they really wanted from each other. It was funny really, the kind of things that made a person realise what was really important.

It was going to be Temari's twenty-fourth birthday in a few days, and he decided that he would get her something this time, for the first time in two years.

Temari sniffed softly, unable to stop the tears from flowing. She licked her lips, tasting the silent, salty tears. "I've missed you."

Instinctively, he leant in towards her, and as his lips locked with hers, all Shikamaru could think was: _'I'll be here for you this time.'_

X X X

A full day had passed before Takamaru returned with Kakashi's reply. There were still teams searching for Matsuri Hamanaku, though the chance she wasn't in the prison when it blew was making some people write her off. The teams sent to track the Amegakure rogue had not come back, but this wasn't entirely alarming: the tracking squads never returned until they either had their quarry or the chase had become ridiculously futile.

The leaf ninja were feeling underused as the Kazekage still hadn't put them on any of the squads that were looking into the strange occurrences, though he'd personally assured them it had nothing to do with not trusting them. Gaara wanted them ready at a moment's notice for the return of the tracking squads as he fully intended on utilising their skills on follow up missions. There was a concern about the spy but the lack of evidence dictated he waited on the outcome of the search currently underway outside of Suna.

Shikamaru exited the V.I.P room he shared with Naruto at the same time that Ino Yamanaka left hers. She was supposed to be sharing the room with Sakura but had assured her guilt ridden pink haired friend that she whole heartedly advocated the girl's decision to spend more time with Gaara. Kami knew they both needed the time alone. Fortunately, the aggravated knucklehead who was still asleep in his and Shikamaru's room, was out of luck when it came to attacking the Kazekage again. Sakura had told Ino all about it after the explosion and the blonde promised to keep an eye on him so that he maintained the peace. He still looked twitchy about it though.

Baki, that odd looking Interrogation Specialist, entered the hallway before Ino could tease Shikamaru. He was holding a dispatch with the Konoha insignia on the seal.

"You seem extra perky this morning," Ino took the opportunity to tease Shikamaru nonetheless.

She noted that the lazy cloud watcher didn't seem as bored as he normally would when Baki handed the reply from Kakashi Hatake to him. Shikamaru ignored her jibe, as he always did, and unravelled the scroll. The annoying blonde bounded over to him and read over his shoulder as Baki left quietly. It would seem that the Hokage and Kazekage had their own plans regarding the leaf team and Anbu that Kakashi had sent to Suna.

"Interesting," Ino mused. "Well at least we know for sure Gaara trusts us after all, right?"

Shikamaru groaned uncharacteristically, every happy thought from his time with Temari feeling like only a momentary pleasure on the blemish that was this mission. He muttered incoherently.

"Troublesome."

X X X

Nusan was an ex-Anbu and used to have a similar squad to the one he occasionally led these days. Back when he'd first left the Anbu he had taken some time off due to personal problems. The fourth Kazekage was in charge back then and it was shortly before that incident when Orochimaru had killed him and taken his place. The Chunin exams in Konoha had harmed both villages, so Nusan had returned to duty earlier than expected. But instead of re-enlisting with Anbu, he put time into the missions that were dedicated to reforming the treaty with Konohagakure. Shortly after that was a success, he'd agreed to captain a new Genin team. But after a few years, the team was transferred to the care of a special Jounin and Nusan, being ex-Anbu, was personally requested by the new Kazekage to captain the group that Gaara had been intending on leading.

This was how he had found himself concerned about the disappearance of Matsuri Hamanaku.

He had been checking out one of the possible exit points of the escaping Amegakure rogue when he found her. The hours in the sun were hard on everyone, even those originally from Suna. The visiting leaf ninja spent their time in the shade or indoors, not used to the weather. Nusan had heard it was almost always sunny in Konoha, but adding more heat as well as the incremental build up of sand made for a much more unpleasant stay in Suna than they were otherwise used to. So, when he realised that Matsuri was lying in the shadow of the Suna outer wall and clearly unconscious, he wondered how she had gotten there. After a quick check of her vitals, he carefully lifted her beaten body into his arms and Shunshined to the medical core. The hospital had slowed a bit, with the people affected by the explosion beginning to recover, all thanks to Lady Haruno of course, though Nusan doubted she'd take that flattery seriously.

A young nurse he recognised as Suri noticed him and immediately ushered Nusan through the emergency doors. He left his charge with the doctors and exited the emergency room. Concerned, he hung around to find out her condition. She wasn't in any immediate danger, but they were having trouble healing some of her internal injuries. Nusan just nodded silently and decided to fetch Sakura Haruno. If anyone could heal her…

It was an hour later when he finally discovered her whereabouts and accompanied the pinkette as she hurried toward the hospital.

"Wait out here," she said, and he realised she wasn't talking to him.

Rokka Namura, the medic from Nusan's team, had just arrived and was about to barge into the operating room.

"Lady Haruno," he said, shocked.

"Stay here," she repeated, and then shared a look with Nusan.

The older man nodded silently, and she ran into the emergency department.

"Sensei?" Rokka asked, only now noticing the Jounin.

"Rokka," Nusan said. "Matsuri is in good hands. You shouldn't be concerned."

The girl had been out there for more than a day, so the younger man was _very_ concerned. Anyone who had met Rokka knew he had a crush on his team mate. There was no telling him to leave and get some rest; he wouldn't go.

The time it took for Sakura to re-emerge seemed to take its toll on Rokka and he went from pacing to kneeling on the floor, sitting on a chair and then back to pacing every few minutes. Nusan was going to tell him to stop it, but decided against it. His own nerves weren't exactly pristine either. When the pinkette walked over to them, Rokka had been kneeling. He stood quickly and smiled when he noticed how confident she looked.

"She's going to recover," she said. "She wasn't in the sun for long, the shadow of the wall probably saving her from severe dehydration. It's her internal wounds that will take the longest to heal, but she should wake up in a day or two."

She left the men to their thoughts and Nusan sighed. "I will tell Samuno."

He disappeared like a typical Anbu would. Samuno Hitokashi was the other member of their squad and not someone Rokka liked very much. He was incredibly competitive and loved to tease Matsuri when she mentioned the Kazekage. Rokka waited for Matsuri to be moved to the I.C.U and snuck into the room to sit by her bed. He didn't care if he got caught, only that he didn't want her to be alone right now. The immense relief of seeing her alive and not beaten to near death exhausted him and he soon fell into a restless slumber.

It was only an hour later when Sakura came to check up on the newest patient in this ward. She smiled slightly, noticing that Rokka Namura, the Chunin she'd guessed had a crush on Matsuri, was asleep in the chair by said Kunoichi's hospital bed. He looked so cute and concerned at the same time; whatever concerned him in his dreams were twitching his features. Sakura was glad he was here and decided against waking him up just to chastise him and chase him out. Some rules were meant to be broken after all. She was proof of that. According to Suna tradition, the Kazekage was actually forbidden from having any kind of romantic relationship from someone outside of Suna. It wasn't law, just some tradition that Gaara had mentioned to her last night when talking about his plans for the future.

He rarely got forceful with the council and was currently doing so over their disapproval of his desire to be with her. Just the memory of the things he'd said to her brought a slight tinge of pink to the pinkette's face. But she wasn't ready to openly inform the entire of Suna of their relationship, or whatever it was right now, even though the rumours already spoke of it. She was happy right now, for the first time in years, and didn't want to rush anything. She needed to take it slowly, on the public front.

Sakura sighed, shaking her head of these thoughts, double checked Matsuri's chart, went over the nurse's additional notes and moved up next to the young girl's side. She held a hand along her chest, checking for residual bleeding but found none. The brunette was lucky; her surface wounds were superficial, but it was the internal damage that had the pinkette concerned, as she'd told Rokka and that Jounin... Nusan she believed was his name. It was consistent with a medical attack on her lungs and kidneys.

Sakura chewed her bottom lip, glancing over at the sleeping form of Rokka… of Matsuri's _medical_ team mate. Surely he hadn't…

She grabbed the clipboard with the chart on it and made a dash for the office of the head doctor. Itsumo Nashika needed to know. This was potentially damning for the young Chunin, but it had to be said, and before she even thought of bringing this to Gaara, Sakura needed an experienced doctor to recheck her findings and hopefully put her doubts to rest. But there was no other way to say this except bluntly.

Sakura knocked on the door, waited for the old man's "come in", and then entered with trepidation. She never liked doubting a fellow ninja's actions, let alone their allegiance, but she'd been down this road with others, and it was always best to nip this thing in the butt before it got out of control. If there was any validity for her doubts, this was a confusion easily cleared up. The alternative to this was to play this safe.

"Itsumo-Sensei," Sakura bowed slightly.

"Just call me Itsumo please, young Sakura," he said. He'd been trying to get her to drop the honorific for what felt like _years_ now. "As if I would let the prized pupil of the late Gondaime refer to me as though I was _her_ superior."

"You are," Sakura said, waving his flattery away.

"I am merely your elder," he said, " _not_ your superior. Now, what can I do for you Lady Haruno?"

His mouth twitched into a smirk when she frowned at his "lady" reference. She supposed he was fighting fire with fire on that one. Sakura pushed aside her desire to combat him on this and got straight to the point.

"Its' about Matsuri Hamanaku."

"Oh?"

"I've gone over the test results and even conducted a series of my own, just preliminary probing using chakra. I was curious about some inconsistencies and well, I believe I know who attacked her."

Itsumo sat up straight in his chair, staring at the pinkette seriously now. "Who was it?"

"You see, that's the thing: Matsuri's injuries aren't ordinary ones. They're more consistent with self inflicted wounds."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	23. Releasing Tension.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

There was enough heat in the room as it was. Gaara Sabaku was angry. The Kazekage didn't like to get angry, he didn't want to lash out; but when he felt the emotion rise in his chest, trying to claw its way up his throat, he didn't fight it this time. He _needed_ to vent, and the council was staring at him like he was an insolent little child. He tried not to growl however, not wanting to sound like Shukaku.

"I forbid it!" He snarled. "No more!"

"It hardly matters," a member called Tsuko said, his eyebrows furrowed. "If indeed Suna plays host to a spy for say, the Amegakure rogues, we need to flush him out. As you've said, the injuries sustained by one Matsuri Hamanaku _were_ self inflicted, so I hardly see the point in trying to figure out _how_ she got so beaten."

Gaara narrowed his eyes at him. Was the old man going deaf? He already said that wasn't what he was talking about. Stupid people didn't know how to listen to others. He had just told them to stop sending squads out into the desert. That first team had completely vanished, no trace of them, while every team since then have come back either having been tossed like a rag doll by these infernal sandstorms (this was a bad time of year for them), or were forced to return to save themselves a beating from said storms. He would not allow anyone else to charge head first into that anymore.

"I'll go myself," Gaara said angrily.

"You cannot," a member called Aumen said. "It has already been stated that since the last time you–" (he coughed dramatically) "– _left_ Suna on some fool's errand, you are not to leave the sand until such time that your _problem_ is satisfactorily dealt with."

"My problem?" Gaara asked. "My problem is the reason this is all happening, just say it if you're going to say it. It was a past council that made it happened, under the orders of the fourth Kazekage in the first place. I will _not_ allow you to risk more lives, and as for Matsuri, there's nothing to be done until she wakes up. Now, if you'll excuse me."

He didn't bow before leaving the council room, and gave them no time to respond as he slammed the door behind himself. He didn't care that he was acting out of character, or that the council was more than likely now mumbling things about his mental well being – the only thing that mattered was getting to the bottom of these problems. Gaara was beginning to regret each and every one of those ridiculous excuses for council members.

And the idea that Matsuri Hamanaku had something to do with that explosion was just… ridiculous! He _knew_ her for Kami's sake! He sighed. The spy, whoever they were, was probably someone he knew as well. He hated questioning the loyalty of his own people but, as Kazekage, it was unfortunately a part of his job description. And even if it only happened one time, it was still one time too many.

Gaara returned home, knowing Sakura wouldn't be there, gathered up a few supplies (he wouldn't need many, really), and left Suna. He knew how to get out without being seen, and was determined to _not_ come back empty handed. At least this time it wasn't Shukaku diligently guiding his footsteps, although he _did_ have to make a conscious effort to push its voice to the back of his head. He wasn't going to be dissuaded from this course.

As he travelled, he could feel the sand around him, whispering, telling him where to go… he could _feel_ the lingering presence of the other tracking teams that had made it back, but there was nothing on those still missing. Normally, he knew where to go pretty quickly, even if he did take a while to actually get there, but this was different. Holding onto hope was the only thing he could do as he followed the path taken by previous squads instead of looking for a trail or scent that didn't exist.

He let his mind wander as he ran; occasionally he had to protect him as sandstorms picked up, and he was finding that his own sand was fighting a losing battle with this, but pressed on nonetheless.

His thoughts went to Matsuri, her squad and Sakura's findings. _Why_ would someone attack themselves? He'd never thought the young girl he knew would do something so, stupid. He wanted to believe she hadn't done it, but the evidence was both overwhelming and damning. He had no choice but to go with that. But he would abstain from passing judgement or deciding on his next action with her until she woke up. There wasn't much of a chance that anything she had to say would change what was coming her way. It wasn't like attacking herself was some kind of treasonous act against Suna, but the council was determined to blame her for the explosion at the prison.

No-one knew where she was when it had gone off. No-one had seen her shortly before it went off, nor for a whole day afterward. So she had no alibi. Gaara was hoping Matsuri had _something_ to say for herself that would remove her from the council's glaring blame. Until then, all he could do was try to find out what happened to the tracking squad that was first dispatched to find the Ame rogue who'd escaped.

It occurred to him that by chasing them down, he would be putting himself in a position for them to find and grab him. But they'd have to know he was out here, and even if there was a spy in Suna (he didn't doubt it though), this trip was "unofficial" anyways. He didn't have permission to be out here. There was no way for the rogues to realise he was here… right?

Gaara slowed to a stop as he noted movement through the haze that was the current sandstorm. He didn't have to stop and wait out storms like everyone else, which was why he never lost his way and could evade anyone out here, no matter their level of training. When Sakura had found him at the wind shrine, he'd already started transforming. Shukaku wanted to be found, it played on his guilt, his fear, and his belief that Sakura would never forgive him.

So what was different now?

Well, that was obvious.

He continued to stare at the figures barely distinguishable through the upturned earth as they continued north-west of his position, not noticing him. He felt their chakra levels, and their intent. Gaara wondered how many rogues had moved into Ame, and how long it would be before they all killed themselves in one of these sandstorms. They were stupid to keep moving in near zero visibility.

And it was on that thought that they seemed to stop moving. Perhaps the storm was becoming too much for them after all and they'd finally realised what idiots they really were? It was too bad that they didn't realise they were stupid for causing so much trouble. This wasn't going to end well.

X X X

Gaara returned to Sunagakure empty handed long after the sun had set. He'd been gone all day. Several days spent scouring the desert was not necessary. This wasn't like two years ago, when it was the Anbu squad sent to Suna with Sakura that he had searched the sands looking for. They were killed by sandstorms, weakened by their fight with rogue ninja who had attacked them inexplicably. This time there was no trace of his quarry. The tracker squad sent out to look for the Amegakure rogue who had escaped in the confusion after the explosion at the Suna prison had vanished entirely. No trace of them existed.

They were just… _gone_.

There were two possibilities that occurred to Gaara to explain this: they were killed by a larger group after passing over the border, or captured and taken over the border. He wanted them back as much as anyone, but didn't understand why the rogues would take them to Ame, let alone kill them without depositing their bodies back in wind territory. His morbid side was running his thoughts tonight.

Gaara decided to avoid the council for the night: the state he was in, he was likely to kill them, or at least start a fight of some sort. So he went straight home, delighted when he found Sakura there. That Ino Yamanaka was with her, downstairs, in the living room, and talking in hushed whispers.

What were they up to?

"Kazekage-sama!" Ino jumped up and bowed respectfully. Her hasty response was a dead giveaway they had been talking about him.

Gaara nodded to her, glanced at Sakura's bemused face, and went upstairs, intent on having a shower. He needed to get the grime off of him, and had a sudden urge to remove all traces of sand from his person. Trekking through the desert gathered more sand to him than normal, and sometimes he wondered if everyone ended up this way, or if it was just his jutsu that was to blame – his natural affinity with sand perhaps.

He no longer believed his mother had anything to do with the automatic reflex of sand that sprung up to protect him. Apparently, it didn't seem to think that anything remotely connected to dirt these days, was any threat to him. This was why he desperately needed a shower, more than wanted one. He wished sometimes that that Deidara had succeeded and he was free of these troubles with Shukaku. Sakura's beaming face entered his mind as he stripped down and stepped under the water, making a conscious effort to keep his sand at bay. At least he had control over that automatic reflex, not like he used to.

Gaara closed his eyes for a moment, imagining Sakura had snuck into the shower with him, and then reluctantly pushed the thought away, cleaning himself instead of dwelling. He was pleasantly surprised then, when he heard her enter the bathroom a short time later, just as he'd finished and was about to turn the water off.

"Leave it on," Sakura said, pulling off the shirt she was wearing (was that _his_?). She slipped out of the bottom pyjamas that didn't match his shirt and joined him naked under the water.

"Are we alone?" He asked, surprised by the cheek in his own voice.

Sakura nodded snaking an arm around him to get to the bar of soap. "Ino was especially excited about leaving. Her mind is in a constant state of sexual provocation, and she never stops looking for an outlet."

She frowned at him, noting that the cheek in his voice hadn't crinkled up his eyes or twisted a smirk out of him. "Are you okay?"

He shook his head and as she cleaned herself (yes, he watched…) he told her about the tracking squad. She remembered those two trackers she'd met when searching for Gaara, Kochi and Sendai, were on that missing team. She hadn't much liked Kochi, but Sendai had seemed to have a level head. She put the bar of soap aside and pushed Gaara gently so that she was now the one directly under the streaming water.

Sakura stared into those pale eyes, taking in the sadness and anger and lifted her arms to rest on his shoulders. "I'm sorry Gaara."

He responded by running his hands over her skin, washing away the excess foam caused by the soap. He licked his lips, his eyes trailing her body as he went. She could see it on his face so clearly: he needed to unwind, to release some tension.

Sakura lifted his head, smiled sadly into those hypnotic eyes, and leant in to kiss him; not giving Gaara a chance to react to her fervour, she threw her arms around his neck, angling herself under the water as her legs wrapped his waist and he pushed her against the white tiled wall. Pressed against her, he devoured his cherry blossom's mouth, exploring her cavern and feeling himself begin to rise and harden as she attacked him with equal passion. The water trickled down over them both, reminding him of a smoother version of his sand, and finally, he broke the kiss, moving his mouth to her mounds, tasting it on her skin.

She couldn't get enough: with his mouth hot on her breasts, his teeth grazing her nipples, she grinded her hips against him, eliciting an animalistic growl from him. She was so wet already; she could feel her juices mixing in with the water running down her legs. She rested her head back, against the wall, continuing to tease them both as she rolled her hips, her fingers lacing through that short crimson hair and tugging with every rotation of her pelvis.

"Gaara…" She yelped softly as he bucked underneath her.

Without warning, he lifted his hips, pushing himself into her. She gasped as he filled her, and returned to kissing him as he continued to thrust eagerly. He needed this, he _wanted_ it and the different position, and of standing up in the shower while stretching her inner walls… he could never have imagined this sensation, the satiation. He gripped her tightly, possessively, as he rammed into her, pulling out and then slamming back in. She was growling with every thrust and he knew he wouldn't last long this way, but didn't care. He _needed_ this.

Sakura broke the kiss, pulling on his hair roughly as she bucked, her head resting on the wall behind her again as her body shuddered, releasing as Gaara expelled inside of her. She moaned, not wanting to lose the lingering feel of friction inside of her as he slid out and gently set her down to stand on her own two feet.

"Wow," she said, having trouble breathing.

This earned a smirk from the Kazekage, and a slight tinge of red on his face and ears. Sakura giggled, shoved him playfully, and moved away from the wall. She kissed him quickly and proceeded to dry herself without bothering with getting dressed. Taking her lead, Gaara followed her back into his bedroom.

But they weren't done with each other, not by a long shot.

They finally made it to the bed, both dry now as Sakura climbed on top of her Kazekage. She ran her hands through his hair, loving the way his locks felt between her fingers. She would never get tired of that feeling. She deepened the kiss as Gaara slid his fingers between her folds in an attempt to moisten her again. She didn't take much encouragement, and fingered his shaft as she kissed him, moaning into his mouth with every thrust of his fingers. When she felt him full in her hands, Sakura shifted, lifting off of him and then slamming down, swallowing him whole. This was another feeling she couldn't get enough of. She didn't care what happened tomorrow, the next day or next week, she would always come back to him.

They took it slower this time, but Sakura felt herself peaking just as before, and once this feeling pooled through her, she decided to ground out the last of his erection instead of moving her hips up and down, milking him until they were both spent. The heat twisting through her womb was a reminder that she performed the birth control jutsu often.

"Mm," she slid off of him and cuddled up to him as Gaara pulled the covers over them both. "I love you Gaara."

She didn't hear him as he whispered it back, because the next second her exhaustion set in and she drifted off, deliriously content.

Gaara could not sleep, not at first. He just wanted to rest his eyes, to allow his exhausted body a reprieve. With Sakura lying beside him, it was easier than it had been for years. She brought out the calm inside of him, now that his guilt wasn't so easily malleable by Shukaku. She was a double edged sword for that demon; his guilt over her rape a portal to controlling his body, but now her acceptance of him a path to silencing the lust that was born of the demon's punishment for its vessel.

Yeah, sure, Hana Kudamono's meditation technique worked as well… in its own way. Whatever energy he required to keep Shukaku at bay while asleep, he could gather while awake.

But he hadn't wanted to fall asleep, not really. The demon couldn't take him over anymore, he was sure… kind of. In the past, it would eat at his psyche, and there was nothing he could do about it. Growing up, Gaara had found himself bombarded by jutsus cast on him by various Jounin under his father's orders, to keep him awake. It wasn't like he was the embodiment of the creature within him; no baby could be expected to stay awake on its own.

Gaara stared at his ceiling, wanting desperately to toss and turn as he would be expected to do in this situation, but abstaining. Sakura was so peaceful next to him, he didn't want to disturb her. Instead, he rolled over to watch her sleep. Her face was so serene, her eyelashes fluttering as she dreamt whatever was going on in that head of hers. The sight of her naked form, hidden under the thin, summer sheets brought a smile to his face and before he knew it, his eyelids grew heavy.

But the darkness that worried him while he was awake was waiting for him when he slept.

X X X

There was no life here; the land of wind was dead, dry, and barren. A war had been raging for decades and this area was the epicentre for its destruction. No-one was left alive, as the bodies of the dead littered the landscape. The figure that stood amongst them wasn't really here. He hadn't even been born yet.

Gaara Sabaku was the fifth Kazekage, and looking out over the memory his demon was sharing with him, he knew suddenly that this era was that of the third. The one who had disappeared inexplicably, only to have his puppet self discovered when Sasori of the Red Sand was hunted and killed by leaf and sand ninja alike only three years ago _his_ time.

' _Why am I here?'_

' **HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SHOW YOU MY LITTLE JINCHURIKI, UNTIL YOU UNDERSTAND, THERE IS NO FIGHTING THE INEVITABLE? WAR IS INEVITABLE, BLOODSHED IS INEVITABLE, AND MY THIRST CANNOT BE SO EASILY IGNORED!'**

Gaara looked around as though Shukaku's voice had come from right behind him, but he saw nothing. What was the demon trying to prove, that no matter what he did, it would have some measure of control over him? His need to visit Konoha and have their sealing teams give a second opinion on his seal was one that went hand in hand with never wanting to hurt Sakura, Suna, or anyone he considered an ally. And it was going to happen, whether Shukaku liked it or not.

A sharp, angry jolt to the back of his head snapped him out of it and Gaara's eyes fluttered open, revealing the ceiling of his bedroom to him. He was awake again, with Sakura Haruno splayed out over his body in a strange yet comfortable position.

He worried over that dream – it wasn't like the last one; so faint in his mind, he remembered it was a memory from the past. This time it was an omen; a promise that it hadn't forgotten about him and his recent concerns (the outbursts) were food for the monster within.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	24. Stir Crazy.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

He was tired of this, of the strange dreams, the whispering voice of Shukaku, and his inability to get a full night's sleep. Gaara _wanted_ the restful slumber Sakura was currently enjoying; it had never been more real to him as it was right now that it was possible. He wanted this problem with the Ame rogues to just go away so he could take the Hokage up on his offer and have the leaf sealing experts look at his seal. He had no grievance with the Suna tacticians, but the leaf teams had a different style that was worth looking into. He had to take the opportunity if there was any hope they could do better.

He didn't care who succeeded.

He thought about his weird dream. At first look, it had appeared just as another reminder that he was stuck with Shukaku, no matter what, and that the demon believed the very existence of a jinchuriki would only ever incite war. Perhaps the lure of power will always be too great a temptation for some to resist. But then, why would Shukaku bother telling him that? It had shown him memories before now, images of things it had done with previous hosts, and they were a jumble in Gaara's subconscious.

Shukaku used to eat at his psyche, especially if he ever fell asleep, but it was the transformation that truly made him dangerous. After years of relying heavily on jutsus to keep him awake, it wasn't an easy transition into normal slumber. He had wondered when Hana first mentioned it, if meditation would ever be enough, and had discovered it wasn't. It helped, but it didn't solve the problem. He needed a permanent solution, not a temporary reprieve, if he was to keep Shukaku under lock and key.

The beast was just taunting him, like it always did.

Gaara rolled over and stared at Sakura. Sleeping peacefully next to him, she always looked like she was dreaming of heaven, or at least something that made her feel deliriously happy. He felt so jealous. She seemed so oblivious to the kind of pain he took for granted, but he knew that appearances were deceiving with her. She'd suffered, as all ninja ultimately do, and had her body, spirit, and mind shattered. But she was better now, and it was the fierce determination of Naruto Uzumaki that had rubbed off onto her.

Naruto.

Gaara rolled away from Sakura, dressed quickly, and left his mansion, noting that the sunrise wasn't far away. If something good had indeed come out of that dream with Shukaku, it was the realisation that he needed to talk to the blonde again. Naruto had gotten in the punches he wanted to, so… he would be willing to listen and talk now, right?

He couldn't leave things the way they were between them any longer.

Gaara found the apartment building where V.I.P visitors were always housed quickly, though a part of him was so nervous that he wished it was literally on the other side of the village. He didn't bother going in through the door and instead hefted himself up to the window that Naruto and Shikamaru shared, hoping the lazy cloud watcher wasn't in there. He seemed to be lucky on that account, and wondered briefly if Shikamaru was with Temari. He couldn't help but smile at that. With him spending time with Temari and Sakura sleeping her nights away in Gaara's bed, this left both Naruto and Ino alone. Maybe they weren't worried about it, but Naruto was married and coming back to Suna so soon after having gotten back to Konoha was probably bugging him.

Yet, Gaara knew, that the blonde had come back to knock him around.

"Naruto," he whispered softly, repeating himself a few times before raising his voice and finally having to shake him awake.

"Nyaah!" Naruto let out an ear piercing scream, flailing in shock at the sight of Gaara's face coming quickly into focus above him.

Luckily, the redhead was quicker than the blonde and managed to muffle most of the sound. "Calm down."

Naruto groaned out Gaara's name, muffled under his hold. The Kazekage moved away, watching him warily. Did he always wake so noisily? It made him worry for Hinata and the years she'd spent waking up next to him, not to mention the years that were still ahead of them.

' _She must really love him to put up with that.'_

Naruto calmed down quickly though, as though he'd just thought Gaara was another part of a dream where he'd attacked him for attacking him…

"G-Gaara," the blonde sat up and groaned. "What are you doing here?"

"I want to talk with you."

"I'm listening."

"Not here."

"Training grounds?"

"No. I think we've fought enough, don't you?"

Naruto thought about that. He'd promised Sakura he would not attack him again, and to be honest, he had kind of let go of the idea anyway. He was still annoyed over what had happened, but there was more to it than that. So he shrugged his shoulders and looked around for something to get dressed into. He was only wearing boxers, and quickly found the pants and shirt he always wore before getting dressed and nodding to his fellow jinchuriki.

"Lead the way."

Gaara didn't move slowly, wanting to get this over and done with so that he could return before Sakura woke up. He didn't think she'd think he'd run off and left the village or anything, but he _felt_ like he needed to be there when she woke. It would be wrong otherwise.

So he found the spot quickly, leading Naruto to a secluded area with a bench that he often used when he wanted peace and quiet. He could look out over Suna from here, and it was such an innocuous place that nobody ever thought to look for him here. And something about the view always relaxed him.

"Nice," Naruto said, noting the isolated area. Civilians would have a hard time getting up here and ninja wouldn't think twice about it.

Gaara nodded and sat down, indicating to Naruto to do the same.

"So…" the blonde said slowly. "What are we here for?"

"I wanted to clear the air."

"But I've already promised Sakura I won't start anything with you and well, I understand Gaara, even if it doesn't seem like it, I really _do_. I've calmed down, _promise_."

Naruto was grinning widely at him, and Gaara couldn't help but smile back.

"Kakashi sent a letter to me via that Anbu who used to be on your squad. He told me he allowed you to return to Suna so we could work together on the Ame problem and I didn't want what happened between Sakura and me to affect that."

"Smart, thanks Gaara, but like I said, its fine," Naruto said and pulled a face. "Now if we only knew what to do about the rogues."

They fell silent. There was nothing to do until Matsuri woke up. But Gaara felt like there was something he was missing, or at least another course of action he should be contemplating in the meantime. It just hadn't occurred to him yet. He felt so useless like this, just _waiting_ for something to happen. Finally, Naruto broke the silence, kicking at some loose gravel as he stared out over the rising sun.

"Its times like these I really miss the pervy sage. He'd know what we should do." He chuckled. "Not that I always listened of course, but he was like a father to me and it helped that he cared enough to tell me what I needed to hear."

Gaara nodded silently. _His_ father could have been counted on to say what he was thinking as well, but it wasn't for the purpose of helping others, let alone Gaara. He wondered how Temari and Kankuro remembered the man, and glanced at Naruto, a little envious that his fellow jinchuriki had had a decent father figure. His thoughts drifted inexplicably to the missions involving the Akatsuki. He voiced his concern to Naruto, even though they both knew the organisation was long gone.

Gaara frowned as he recounted the memory that bothered him the most.

– **Flashback –**

_They were standing outside of an Akatsuki base that was imploding. Gaara jumped out of the way, along with his Anbu escorts and Hiko Takāshi. The man was more frightened than the rest of them put together. He had been spying on the members that had been transferred out of this particular hideout for months, trying to ascertain its location and now that he'd finally found it, it was self destructing._

_Gaara could see the degree of anger in him building up along with the fright of having almost been buried in rubble. He looked away from the Iwagakure ninja and back at the base. The sound could probably be heard for miles around if it hadn't been so secluded – no-one was around to hear the explosion._

_The mixture of sand and leaf Anbu remained quiet, as they always were, but Hiko couldn't hold it in._

" _I'm so sorry Kazekage-sama," he said. "That wasn't supposed to happen."_

_Gaara nodded lightly to him, indicating he wasn't angry at him, his eyes raking the rubble and the distance. He moved closer to it and ignored Hiko's protests. There was someone on the other side of the rubble and upturned dirt. He peered closer, moving his sand through the air in an attempt to clear it, but a moment later, the indistinct figure was gone. But he was sure someone had escaped, and it was looking more and more like the leader, Ouden Tashimaru, had anticipated someone would come looking for the base. Perhaps they'd tripped a security measure without realising it?_

" _Did you see something Kazekage-sama?" One of the Anbu asked._

_Gaara growled loudly, his Anbu companions taking a step backward, but grateful he couldn't see the expressions on their faces. They'd come all this way for nothing, and he was angry that the Akatsuki underling had gotten away, just like the heavy hitters seemed to have after the last few missions. He hadn't felt this angry in a long time, and even if it was the last thing he did, he was going to kill them_ _ all _ _._

– **End Flashback –**

Naruto frowned at the memory. "So you think this Ouden Tashimaru character might still be alive? He could be anywhere by now."

"I know."

"What about that Hiko Takāshi?"

"I don't know."

The blonde shook his head. "How does this help Matsuri?"

Gaara felt frustrated by his friend's questions. He sighed. "There were Akatsuki sub-ordinates we never managed to pin down, but after all this time it hadn't occurred to me that they might be behind what's going on."

"Ame _has_ been very forward with their attacks," Naruto agreed. "Why would you think anyone else had something to do with this?" He grinned. "Aaww, it's just a ruse Kazekage-sama!"

Gaara couldn't help but smile back at him. It was after all, Kirigakure where Akatsuki was first created, so who would connect them with Amegakure? It made sense, but there was no proof. Gaara wanted proof – he _needed_ it. The council was still dead set on blaming Matsuri, and despite her self-inflicted wounds, Gaara felt like he needed to protect her from those blundering fools. He couldn't get his head around the idea she might've had something to do with the explosion… it didn't feel _real_.

She was his friend.

Naruto glanced at him. "What are you thinking?"

Gaara just shrugged his shoulders, staring out over the sand and wishing he could just make all his problems disappear.

"You're not good at lying to me," Naruto said softly, receiving a curious glance. "I saw the way you looked at Sakura back after the Akatsuki tried to grab you."

"You saw..?"

"Uh huh, but she was still hung up on Sasuke and so I didn't want to butt in and complicate things."

Gaara was surprised. People who saw him every day, and even his siblings, had had no idea at the time… that he knew of. He knew Sakura had figured it out recently, but for Naruto, who was well known for not realising facts even if they were screaming in his face, to have realised… the redhead was stunned. There was only one thing he could think of to say to that.

"How uncharacteristically wise of you."

"Hey, I'm wise!"

Gaara couldn't help but chuckle at that. But if Naruto knew back then that meant…

"Yeah," Naruto said, "I kind of deliberately took her away from you. It's not like I'd heard her profess to love you, but she talked about you enough after those three months we spent helping out here in Suna. I think she liked you too, but just didn't realise it. Sakura was never all there in _our_ relationship, but I kept ignoring that and continued to believe it was going to work out."

"What changed your mind?"

Naruto smirked. "I woke up one day and realised I was being selfish. Turns out, Sakura had a similar idea that day and we broke it off at the same time."

"I'm sorry."

Naruto punched the Kazekage in the arm. "Nah, don't be. It was for the best." He gripped his fingers to his pant leg. "Can you forgive me?"

"For wanting Sakura all for yourself?"

The blonde snorted and pulled a face. " _No_! For taking her when she belonged to you."

"Same thing."

"Shut up."

Gaara smiled slightly. "I've done things I'm not proud of, things I have no right to ask for forgiveness for. I can't judge you Naruto."

"You still blame yourself for what happened between you and Sakura two years ago?"

"No, not really. My guilt over that allowed Shukaku to control me so I've tried to let it go. I was talking about before we met, when I gave into Shukaku willingly."

"That's over and done with, you can't–"

"It still happened. I can't change that, but I often find myself remembering the faces of the people I've killed in cold blood."

"More guilt."

"I know."

Gaara had struggled for years after meeting Naruto to push away whatever Shukaku could use to hold onto its control over him. He'd stopped worrying about the past, therefore the guilt never really bothered him, since he'd sort of forgotten a lot of what had happened. But after that day in the Wind Shrine two years ago, it all came flooding back. He was glad now though, that it had been released, and he could put it into its proper context.

Naruto on the other hand, was just oblivious to things that had happened that no longer reflected who Gaara was. He was stupid for getting so angry after hearing he'd raped Sakura, but his anger had taken him over. He thought maybe it was also partially because of his own guilt over not doing or saying anything when he had realised Gaara and Sakura liked each other, other than to claim her of course. She'd been his first, and vice versa, so he worried over that too.

But it was like he'd told Gaara: it was over and done with.

Right now however, the blonde had a sudden urge to embarrass his fellow jinchuriki. No-one else was around so it was just a joke, not worthy of holding a grudge over…

Naruto smirked. "Well anyway, Sakura's great in bed, isn't she?"

Gaara's face reddened immediately and Naruto continued to prod him.

"She's loud too. I was worried _I'd_ be too loud but–"

"I do _not_ want to know about you and Sakura having sex," Gaara growled slightly, his blush deepening.

The blonde pretended to be offended. "Naww, but it was so _good_! Is she loud with you? I bet she screams a lot, and she likes to take charge. Get her on her knees though and she–"

He didn't get a chance to finish that sentence. Gaara's sand was pushing him down, covering his mouth, and knocking him flat onto his back. He wasn't suffocating him, just silencing him. Naruto waved his arms in surrender and warily, Gaara let him go.

"Jeez Gaara," the blonde said playfully, "take a joke."

Naruto stood up and dusted himself off. "Just be good to her Gaara. After everything she's been through, she deserves to be treated well. Like a princess."

He gave the redhead a final smirk and took off, heading back to his room to have a shower. He realised he desperately _needed_ one.

X X X

Lunchtime saw a quick roster change and Sakura found herself having lunch with Ino, who was helping out in the children's ward, and Naruto, who had just come back from a patrol with Shikamaru. Apparently, the cloud watcher had turned down the offer of lunch to spend the rest of the day with Temari.

"It's her birthday," Naruto said.

"We know, baka," Ino said, resisting the temptation to knock him over the head. "We're her friends."

"She wanted to spend the afternoon with Shika at least," Sakura said. "Come on, let's get out of here."

She led the way out of the hospital and into the market district, her friends bickering as they followed behind her. The stares from civilians and Shinobi alike were a little less open now, as the rumour-ville wasn't spinning so fast about her and Gaara anymore. But she was still unnerved by the attention. It was hard to decipher whether or not people thought the rumours of her having some illicit affair with their Kazekage was a good thing or not. Still, at least no-one had approached her about it. She _really_ didn't want to get into a conversation with anyone about it.

"When are we going to do something useful?" Naruto asked. "I've been patrolling forever!"

"I already told you," Ino said, giving into her violent temptation this time. "Our standing orders from the Hokage are to do everything the Kazekage tells us to do."

"But that's boring! Gaara hasn't gotten us to do anything except the usual guard stuff. At least you and Sakura-chan get to spend time at the hospital. I'd bet that's more exciting than telling off little kids for getting too close to the outer walls."

"You know we're going to be on the squads when–"

"Shush Ino! We're not supposed to talk about that in the open!"

Ino turned a distinct shade of red, realising she was just about to let high security information fall out of her mouth like yesterday's gossip. They were in a market place for Kami's sake! There was a spy in Suna, who knew if Matsuri even had anything to do with anything and… She growled inwardly at herself. She knew she'd almost slipped because she was frustrated too. They'd been in Suna for at least three days and hadn't done anything bar clean up duty and guard duty… well, Naruto was right about one thing: volunteering at the hospital was much more interesting than what he and Shikamaru had been doing. She was however, getting stir crazy, so Ino decided to use that as an excuse and snapped at Naruto to get the discussion moving away from her slip up.

Sakura on the other hand, wasn't really listening to them. They found a quaint restaurant and the topic shifted to Gaara. It was Naruto who'd brought him up and she was surprised.

"He's in love with you Sakura."

"Duh," Ino snapped. "Gods, she's not stupid you baka."

Naruto smiled sheepishly. "I know she's not, I was just saying."

"You'll keep."

"Did you talk to him recently?" Sakura asked and he nodded vigorously.

"He came to see me. Don't worry, I didn't hit him, we just talked." His gaze drifted toward the door to the restaurant almost guilty, then rested his eyes back on hers as she stared back, confused. "I'm glad you found each other, Sakura-chan."

It was such sweet relief. Even after he had promised her he wouldn't attack Gaara again, Sakura had been worried. She didn't want them to stop being friends. She smiled at Naruto.

"Good." They were friends again, and that was what mattered.

Half an hour later, Naruto left the girls to themselves and they returned to the hospital. Hana Kudamono had a surprise for them however, and instead of sending a message to Gaara about it, Sakura decided to tell him in person. She shunshined to his office, not caring that she was butting in, but inhaling deeply at the sight of him sitting behind his desk, his eyes narrowed in concentration. Her sudden presence didn't seem to startle him however and he looked up at her, his smile small but genuine.

"Sakura…" Gaara was happy to see her, but could tell from the look on her face that this was an official visit.

The sound of his voice brought a slight smile to her face nonetheless, and she had to pause to wipe it off before adopting her professional tone with him.

"Kazekage," (really, who was she fooling?) "your presence is requested in the hospital."

"Is there a problem?"

"No, not really. I've just been informed that Matsuri has finally woken up."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	25. The Spy in Sunagakure.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

"…Matsuri has finally woken up."

Gaara stared at Sakura for a moment, not blinking, and then stood up, motioning toward her. Sakura allowed him to pull her into a tight embrace and immediately felt his sand swirling around her body. His version of Shunshin always felt different to her, like it was clinging to her body. They landed in front of the reception desk but instead of asking where Matsuri was, Gaara took Sakura's hand and pulled her gently along with him. It would seem he knew where he was going after all.

Sakura let go of his hand when they entered the emergency ward, and rushed over to check on Matsuri. She really didn't need to, but she felt like she _had_ to. The head nurse – Mayumi Chinen – was seeing to Matsuri; she bowed slightly at the pinkette's approach, and then even lower once she noticed the Kazekage. The room consisted of Mayumi, Hana Kudamono, and Rokka Namura as Sakura and Gaara entered.

Matsuri's head jerked up at the pinkette's approach, her eyes drifting from Sakura before moving to Gaara, lingering, and then returning to their original position – the end of her bed. She was sitting up, but as Sakura stared at her, Mayumi Chinen spoke.

"She's ignoring me Lady Haruno. She wouldn't even talk to her team mate who came to see her. She's clearly in shock. Hana?"

The younger medic handed Matsuri's chart to Sakura. Hana had decided she didn't like the Chunin anymore than she liked that good for nothing grandson of the head doctor. She didn't much like Rokka either. She sighed as Sakura handed the chart back.

"She's recovering rather slowly," Sakura said.

Her eyes raked over Matsuri; she looked like she'd just run a marathon, not to mention been through a meat grinder and poorly put back together. It was very possible that whatever the girl had done to herself left her body more weakened than the initial diagnosis had revealed. Slipping into a coma was the body's way of dealing with injuries that were beyond the normal rate of its ability to heal naturally. Of course, this meant that by shutting down, the chances of the patient ever waking up decreased – even more so the longer the coma lasted. Matsuri may have done this to herself, but given her injuries, it _was_ surprising she'd awoken at all. Sakura couldn't figure out _why_ the girl would do this to herself, let alone _how_.

The last time she'd seen her, the Chunin had seemed a little preoccupied, but not depressed.

' _This just goes to show how little I really know about emotional problems; other than my own.'_

Tsunade always did tell her she was a "lame ass" at figuring out other people. Sakura mentally slapped herself when she realised someone had started talking, and the conversation around her centred on the common belief that Matsuri was the spy who had set explosive tags at the prison to let the Amegakure rogue escape – an explosion that had maimed sand Shinobi in the process, the resulting cave in killing a total of eight ninja.

Rokka, who was on the defensive, growled lowly – he was out of line, but he couldn't help the words that spilled out of his mouth. "Anyone who seriously thinks she's a traitor is an S class moron."

"So, you're not the idiot you look like?"

Sakura looked around at the voice. Honshu Uzunara, the grandson of the head doctor, was leaning heavily against the door to the nearby room – a supply closet, really. Rokka snorted at him, but didn't respond directly to his comment. It was Hana who glared daggers at him.

"What's the prognosis?" Gaara asked, speaking for the first time.

The head nurse smiled at him. "She will recover Kazekage-sama, physically at least. Haruno-san is correct: her recovery is slow. Her internal organs were severely damaged, but her life is no longer in any danger."

"Thank you," he replied.

The silence was deafening and, remembering she still had rounds to do, Hana left quietly – glaring at Honshu as she went. The head nurse also disappeared, into the direction of her office no doubt.

Gaara closed his eyes. Baki wasn't far away, and heading in the direction of the hospital, _fast_. He guessed his former Sensei had just come from the council. They pestered the head of the Interrogation Core whenever they couldn't find their Kazekage. The man arrived a few minutes later, and Gaara opened his eyes.

"Kazekage-sama," Baki bowed appropriately. "The council has been informed, and they wish for her to be interrogated as soon as possible."

The redhead nodded mutely at him as he stared at Matsuri, unblinking. She was doing a good job of ignoring everyone, but he saw the subtle twitches of her extremities, so he didn't believe she was in shock – if he had to hazard a guess she was both embarrassed and angry. He knew her well enough, so that was easy for him to see. It would seem that Rokka too, had noticed this, which was why he was defending her so vehemently. Sakura had told Gaara of her suspicions that the young Chunin had romantic feelings for Matsuri and now, looking between them, he could see it.

Rokka interrupted his thoughts, snapping his gaze away from the girl in the hospital bed to glare at Baki.

"She's not a traitor," he said fiercely. "I _know_ Matsuri and she wouldn't sell us out Kazekage-sama."

"That's not for you to decide," Baki snapped back at him, his eyes narrowing at the Chunin – his gaze was intense, but other than averting his eyes, Rokka didn't respond to the intimidation. "She will be interrogated according to Suna law, there are no exceptions."

"He's right," Honshu said calmly, like it was a day in the park and there was nothing important going on.

Rokka just frowned at him, ignoring the weirdly calm man. "Kazekage-sama, I–"

"That's enough," Gaara said sternly. "I know how you feel. Matsuri is my friend too, but this has to be done. The rules apply to everyone." He hesitated, glancing in Matsuri's direction. "I'm sorry."

She didn't respond, choosing to pretend they weren't hovering around her, and closed her eyes heavily for a moment before lazily letting them flutter apart. He didn't blame her, but was worried about her mental state. She hadn't defended herself, offered up anything of value, nor reacted to their presence in the slightest – a small inclination of her head was all she'd made once Gaara entered, probably because they knew each other – but she'd yet to care that Rokka was defending her fiercely. Gaara was surprised at her for her nonchalance – didn't she understand what was going on?

"I'll leave the ANBU that are nearby on watch," Baki said. "And they'll rotate their shifts."

"Is that really necessary?" Rokka asked, the spark of defiance burning in him again.

"Yes," Sakura said softly. "Her wounds were self inflicted. Spy or not, she's a danger at least to herself."

The easy manner in which the pinkette said this stunned the young Chunin. He wasn't sure what to say to that, looking between her and the object of his affections. He'd known her for years: observing her from afar, and when they were put on the same squad, watching up close. She had a temper, a quick wit and was incredibly talented. It was all of these things and more that had drawn him to her, even back when she was timid about using weapons because of what had happened to her parents. He couldn't bring himself to think of her as some spy. She would never harm Suna. He refused to believe that.

But if he had to be completely honest with himself, he wasn't sure whether or not to believe the idea that she'd deliberately hurt _herself_. It too was out of character, but he was nagged with doubt and a side of guilt. Had she been unwell and he hadn't noticed? They were on the same team, they spent time together as friends (even though he wanted more, he was content to wait for her), and he'd told her things about himself that no-one else knew. He _thought_ he knew enough about her to garner her trust when she needed a confidant. She had yet to tell him anything personal that he hadn't already heard about – the rumours about her parents had started shortly after she'd chosen Gaara as her mentor, perhaps out of jealousy from his fan girls.

But it had _nothing_ to do with what was going on now, he was _sure_ of it.

Rokka clenched his fists. "She isn't crazy."

"No-one's saying she is," Sakura said delicately, "but it's better to err on the side of caution, for Matsuri's sake."

Resigned to her logic, he only nodded, his face still rigid as he realised just how weirdly everyone in the room was looking at him. He moved to a chair near Matsuri's bed, taking note that yet again, she didn't react to his presence. She was breathing, her fingers occasionally twitched like she was aching to strangle something, but she continued to stare at the end of her bed as though sleeping with her eyes open and in an upright position.

"I have to insist that everyone except for the ANBU guard to leave," Sakura said. "She needs her rest. That means you too Rokka."

Surprisingly, he just nodded and did as he was told. He looked exhausted, so maybe he was just too tired to fight. Left alone with Matsuri, Sakura tried to talk to her: she moved closer to the bed, close enough to touch the Chunin without having to reach out over the bed and the brunette girl responded. Her head whipped around and she glared at the pinkette. The venom in her expression was unmistakable. This was the first sign of emotion Matsuri had shown.

Sakura inwardly pouted. _'What did I do wrong?'_

X X X

The entire day had been wasted. Gaara had left the hospital, accompanied Baki to the council chambers, and spent the next four hours being bombarded by said council. He'd never had a screaming match outside of a ninja battleground before – not that he could remember anyway. His friendship with Matsuri was belittled, his ability to remain as Kazekage was questioned, and by the time lunch rolled around, he was a step closer to snapping and just letting Shukaku kill every single one of his council. The damned thing was whispering in his head, telling him he'll feel so much better afterward – just fuelling the side of him that wanted to relent.

Kankuro had conveniently turned up only moments before he could consider doing something to them and reminded him softly of the things he would lose if he let loose. It was his brother's words to the council that put the lid on his gourd… so to speak.

Kankuro snorted. "If you're going to draw and quarter the girl, at least do it knowing, without a shadow of a doubt that she's guilty. There is no proof, only circumstantial evidence, and that's being generous. Matsuri Hamanaku is entitled to a fair hearing, like very ninja or civilian."

So Gaara took the opportunity to get away from the idiots and decided, an hour later, not to return at all.

Baki had a full squad of ANBU looking for him in no time, but he knew all the best hiding places in the village and had no intention of returning until the afternoon had worn on.

' _Let's see how the council likes it when I make them wait on_ _me_ _.'_

He'd done this before, just not to such an extent. They knew he was angry with them, so they made no move to search for him – Baki bore the brunt again. Gaara reminded himself to look over the budget to include a raise for the head of the Interrogation Core.

He retreated to the place he'd taken Naruto to – innocuous and peaceful, it was the perfect place to calm down. Meditating helped as well. But Gaara's thoughts went to his arguments with the council nonetheless. They were furious at the lack of evidence that pointed to Matsuri, the lack of vigour in Gaara to rip the truth from the Chunin as though she was simply an inanimate object that wouldn't feel a thing.

It was almost sunset when he sensed Kankuro. Gaara could've escaped and pretended not to notice him, but by this point, he'd calmed down and when his brother silently indicated to him to follow, he relented. The council was waiting for him, and he could've sworn they hadn't moved an inch since he'd left.

"Kankuro," Gaara said. "You are excused."

The puppet master glanced warily between his Kazekage and the council before retreating.

"You are finally ready to hear our side?" Councillor Aumen asked.

"Discussion on that matter is pointless."

"Then why have you returned? Surely it's not to apologise."

Gaara shook his head. "Of course not. You all know I meant every word I said."

"Then what is it?"

The Kazekage smiled. "Now that Matsuri is awake, I want to discuss my plans to draw out the spy."

X X X

Sakura was giving Matsuri a wide berth, not quite sure yet how to explain the brunette's sudden anger toward her. They'd never been so at odds, with the young Chunin being one of the people from Suna she could count on one hand that Sakura trusted above all others: Gaara, Temari, Kankuro, Hana and Matsuri…

Sakura kept her in the corner of her eye, doing her rounds, volunteering to return to Matsuri's bed for the collection of blood samples when the nurses either got tired of going near her or simply refused to treat her. But she didn't touch her, noting how those brown eyes widened slightly as she got too close. The Chunin wasn't giving the evil eye to anyone else, and this upset the pinkette. That concern turned to anger, but she kept it in check. There was something going on with her that she'd missed, something to do with Sakura that no-one had noticed. She was sure of it.

But did it have anything to do with why she'd hurt herself?

Sakura let Rokka in to see her by the afternoon and he became her main concern – he would just sit there, half staring at Matsuri, and looking like a stone version of her.

"And I thought I had troubles," Temari said, shortly before sunset, when she and Shikamaru came into the hospital to check on Matsuri. Sakura had just told them about the Chunin's condition. "Gaara and Kankuro spoke with the council: they've dropped the more substantial charges against Matsuri, based on lack of evidence. But she's going to be under evaluation and may even loose her rank."

Sakura sighed heavily at that. At this rate, Matsuri would never be trusted as a ninja ever again. It sounded harsh though, and she had to remind herself that Sunagakure's laws were far harsher than Konoha's. Suna ninja were pushed harder and treated harsher; apparently, it was even worse before Gaara became Kazekage. For now, Matsuri had the sanctuary of the hospital to keep her from being grilled, but that would soon change. Just thinking about the possible punishments waiting for her made Sakura shivered.

Shikamaru interrupted her thoughts. "It's troublesome, but we're going to have to keep looking for the spy."

Temari growled at him. "You make it sound like you _wanted_ it to be Matsuri."

He groaned. The woman was putting words in his mouth again. He couldn't help but worry over what he'd gotten himself into with her. But like his father had once said, it was the Nara way. He'd dug his own grave. He would just have to suck it up and deal with it. And as much as Temari got on his nerves, she was also an eternal source of comfort and contentment. He would never admit this to her out loud however, knowing she'd hold it over his head, even if only for a short while. The woman loved getting the last word in on _everything_.

But Shikamaru ignored Temari's comment, despite the annoyance rolling off of her. He didn't bother retorting, and after a few moments of glaring at him, Temari let it go. "Well, since Matsuri's asleep, I'll see her tomorrow. Coming Shikamaru?"

He sighed nodded reluctantly before following her out.

"They're so cute together," Hana said, having come up behind Sakura. She moved away quickly and the pinkette was left wondering what had just happened.

' **Well, you're the one that was excited about returning to Suna in the first place.'**

' _True.'_

Still, she was waiting on Gaara – they all were. It was just tedious, and she couldn't wait for all of this to be over.

Matsuri Hamanaku wasn't the spy…

Sakura was glad. She didn't want to think about what that would do to Temari or Gaara, who were both close to her in their own ways, not to mention Rokka. It didn't explain away herself inflicted wounds however, and the pinkette was beginning to think that was something more personal for the Chunin.

She was completely exhausted, with only half her normal chakra and was looking forward to a nice, long hot bath. So Sakura finished her work in the hospital and decided to walk back to the Kazekage's mansion instead of using a teleportation jutsu. She probably shouldn't be going at it alone, but it was just a short distance. She stopped, looked up at the moon, which was high in the sky above her and made a decision; she was about to jump to the nearest rooftop to get back faster, when something stopped her.

She let out an involuntary yelp of surprise which was quickly muffled by a rough hand to her mouth; a strong, heavy arm then wrapped around her waist and pulled her off the street.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	26. Incentives.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

' _Acting friendly is easy: it doesn't make you a good person.'_

Sakura Haruno had spent the first sixteen years of her life just trying to make others happy, thinking that was the key to her own happiness. The school yard bullies made her cry – it was apparently very entertaining for them. Her parents had wanted a boy, so she wore shorts and tried to hide her hair until she turned five because people were getting suspicious – they didn't like not knowing who she really was.

And that was how she'd learnt to pretend to care – to pretend she was just like everyone else. It had served her well then but, right now, it was _killing_ her.

She hadn't sensed his approach. Sakura was tired, having once again overdone it with her enthusiasm to help out at the hospital. She wasn't weak: this fact had saved her life more often than not, and she would pulverise anyone who claimed otherwise. But there were ways of deceiving exhausted ninja, even when their guard was up because of some overachieving spy slinking through the streets of Suna. This person, whoever they were, was not afraid to create explosive diversions to accomplish his goals. His jutsus were unknown, his position in the village was impossible to determine and whether or not he was even a 'he'.

But all of that amounted to nothing when she was exhausted from a full day's work.

The strong arms holding tightly to her felt like they were crushing her body. Sakura Haruno couldn't move more than an inch; her arms pinned to her side, she couldn't reposition to hit her assailant. She felt like the life was being drained from her, and realised a moment later that it was chakra leaving her body. Her attacker was siphoning it off, while muffling her so that she couldn't cry out and attract attention to them. She felt compressed, and despite her inability to move enough to use her chakra fist, suddenly realised her legs were flailing freely.

Sakura tried to kick out, hitting his legs, to no avail. She was already feeling weaker than she had in years. It took a lot longer than a few minutes of being drained of chakra to make her feel like this in the heat of battle.

"Struggling will get you nowhere," the husky voice in her ear told her.

She couldn't place him, but felt like she should know who it was. A moment later, as he shifted her in his arms and grunted involuntarily, she heard a certain amount of familiarity in his sounds. But it couldn't be _him_.

Sakura tried to speak under the stifling pressure of his hand, to say his name. He was holding her too tightly, pressed against her like a second skin, and all that came out of her mouth was a muffled cry. But he seemed to understand what she'd mumbled despite it coming out so garbled and a heavy breath tickled the shell of her ear.

"I wondered if you could figure me out."

Sakura groaned, the sound of his name seeping through better this time and his suspicion "Honshu?"

Honshu Uzunara, the grandson of the head doctor of the Suna hospital… she heard him chuckle softly, but he didn't otherwise dignify her questioning with a response. She felt confused, scared, and angry. What the _hell_ was he doing? Okay yeah, he was draining her chakra, the blue enveloping her reminding her of that man... Yoroi Akado? He was the one who had fought Sasuke years ago in the preliminaries of the second round during their Chunin exams eight years ago.

But _why_? The spy… no, it wasn't possible. He was never rude to her, never showed her anything other than reverence, while being absurdly clumsy… maybe _too_ clumsy. Did Itsumo know his grandson was a lunatic? Sakura half sobbed under his hand and kicked out again.

"It's almost over Sakura," he said, sounding more like Honshu now, but with an underlying tone to his voice she couldn't place. It bordered on the tone one would use to soothe a lover. "Calm down now," he added, his lips brushing her neck.

' _Kami, what the fuck?!'_

Panic surging through her, she felt her body jerk as his moved with her; Sakura managed to twist an arm out of his grip and turn her shoulders to get a better aim at his side. Honshu's grip tightened, and he pushed her toward the wall in front of her. The alley was dark, quiet and _stank_ of the residue of the destitute and drunken losers common in all villages.

Sakura lashed out with her arm, slamming her fist into his thigh. He grunted and she felt her medical scalpel graze his side as she pulled away from him. However, Honshu was at full strength, and growing stronger with every second as he drained what chakra she had left.

"Please," she whispered, realising his hand had slipped from her mouth.

Honshu quickly recovered his grip as she screamed out, muffling her before the bulk of the sound could travel.

"No," he whispered back. "The Ame rogues have business with our _beloved_ Kazekage and you're going to facilitate their meeting."

The former Akatsuki subordinate they were all searching for went by the name Ouden Tashimaru, what did Honshu have to do with that?

Sakura pushed and twisted her body, but the effort itself was draining. She looked around for something to mark – something a tracker ninja or one of her friends would notice. There was pipe nearby: she contemplated kicking at it. It was, more than likely, attached to someone's plumbing, but this couldn't be helped. Summoning the last of her chakra, the way Tsunade taught her, Sakura pulled her assailant with her as she slammed into the rusted pipe. She couldn't hit Honshu or have him ram into the building to release his grip on her, so this would have to do.

The pipe burst and they were drenched: she sobbed again, feeling her legs give out underneath her and her body give in. She couldn't fight anymore, and closed her fatigued eyes as Honshu lifted her up bridal style and she felt the familiar sensation associated with a teleportation jutsu just before she blacked out completely.

X X X

The mornings in Suna were always the same – gritty but picturesque. Temari had never worried about the sand and wind so much as she'd worried about the heat. Even after twenty-four years, she still hated heatwaves more than anyone else she knew. Kankuro had joked once that it was the reason she'd adopted an iron fan as her signature weapon – so she could fan herself whenever she needed to cool down. Needless to say, he'd spent the rest of the day in the hospital and the rest of the week on "probation".

She loved the warmth of the mornings though, and would sunbathe naked if she wasn't worried about some random Shinobi finding her.

The troubled Kunoichi found herself shaking awake her lover instead, frustrated with how lazy Shikamaru Nara was in the mornings. He moaned and tried to push her away – he _had_ to still be asleep: he wouldn't have bothered pushing her if he was awake.

"Temari…" He murmured, trying to roll over.

She stopped in the middle of half throttling him to smile at that. It was one of those moments she wished she had the abilities of the Yamanaka clan: she'd pay to know what he was dreaming about.

"Shikamaru," she said. "Wake up." He just groaned again and she shook her head. "You're in my bed Shikamaru, and any minute now, Gaara is going to come bursting through those doors and suffocate you in his sand."

The Nara twitched.

"Shikamaru…" She cooed, sounding a little like a disembodied voice. "Get your lazy bones out of my bed."

He shifted and she blew onto the shell of his ear, giggling when he started awake.

"Temari," he groaned, gazing at her through heavy lidded eyes. "What was that for?"

"No reason."

"Nice to know."

"Come on," she said, climbing out of bed and reaching for her clothes. "I want to see Sakura before Gaara sends you guys on your mission."

Shikamaru watched her dress for a moment before following suit. "He does have faith in you," he said sagely. "But your skills are–"

"Better suited for the outside fighting, not the inside – I _know_."

He wisely shut his trap, not wanting to be on the wrong end of her anger. She was looking annoyed enough as it was. The Kazekage had a plan to use himself as bait for the spy (a plan the council rejected but couldn't prevent him from instigating anyway) and Shikamaru, Naruto, Ino and Sakura were going to be on standby for when the time came. The Konoha ANBU were put in the same arrangement as Temari and Kankuro, along with a handful of Suna ANBU – Shikamaru had voiced his own concerns about the validity of this plan. He didn't think it was safe enough to use the real Gaara, but the Kazekage wouldn't let anyone pretend to be him long enough to get everyone else in position.

Of course, all this planning was for naught if they didn't get started before sundown _today_.

Shikamaru grudgingly followed Temari as they made their way to Gaara's mansion. They entered through the front door and he decided to wait downstairs for a few minutes first – he didn't want to walk into the Kazekage's bedroom with a half naked Sakura to burn out his corneas. She was attractive, but he had no illusions as to what she would do to him if he accidentally saw any part of her that he didn't normally see due to her normal brazen attire.

Temari climbed the stairs alone, but she was starting to get a strange feeling. She hadn't even thought of checking to see if she could detect the pinkette's chakra – where else would she have spent the night?

She was supposed to be here.

Temari looked around, frowning at the tidy bedroom. She had been planning to surprise Sakura, but the overworked medic was nowhere to be seen. The room she shared with Gaara was empty, the bed still made: the hired help had yet to come in because they couldn't enter the Kazekage mansion without permission, even if it was to clean up after the lazy man. Temari's frown deepened once Shikamaru finally followed her in.

' _Speaking of lazy men.'_

"What took you so long?" She asked. "Never mind: Sakura isn't here, and neither is Gaara."

"Gaara might still be with the council," Shikamaru said, looking around, confused by the clean state of the room. "I had no idea Sakura was such a neat freak."

"She's not – I already told you, she's not here."

"There could be any number of reasons for that, stop worrying."

"Well, even if Sakura spent the night at the hospital _again_ , Gaara wouldn't waste that much time with the council."

"Maybe he's over at the hospital."

"Maybe…"

Temari moved toward the window and looked out. The sun was only just rising and she normally loved the warmth it radiated, but this morning, it felt cold. She'd spent her life in Suna, only leaving for missions and never taking a proper vacation. Perhaps, once this was all over, she might do just that – if Shikamaru was willing to go with her. Her thoughts lingered on the famous hot springs of the land of earth… there were so many places she had never wanted to go that now sounded like heaven.

If she could only get over her severe dislike of high temperatures.

"Something else is bothering you."

Temari glanced back at Shikamaru. "Yeah, none of this sits right."

He moved up next to her, placing a comforting hand on hers. "I know, but there's nothing we can do by just standing here."

She gave a noncommittal groan and he moved away from her.

"Did you not notice this?" Shikamaru asked, drawing his lover's attention away from her thoughts. He was holding up a sealed parchment. "It was on the bedside table."

"What does it say?"

Shikamaru studied it, his expression growing darker with every line. "The Amegakure rogues have taken Sakura and are demanding an 'audience' with the Kazekage."

Temari snatched the parchment from him and growled. "She's the bait?" She skimmed through the note. "Gaara is _not_ going to like this."

X X X

He felt like all the air had just left his lungs and Gaara couldn't breathe. If that wasn't bad enough, his body was trembling and he felt like he was standing on the edge of a precipice – one where icy winds threatened to knock him over because he had no sense of balance or understanding of gravity. How could he have been so careless, so _stupid_? He had it all figured out, the plan, the players and the part where he never had to worry about anyone coming after him or someone he loved ever again. Naruto couldn't have been more confident about this plan than him.

Gaara swallowed heavily. Bile threatened to work its way up his throat and he had to concentrate not to throw up or black out. It was quite a sight – the Kazekage getting worked up and bordering on passing out. He had never loved anyone like this before and he felt like something was gripping his heart and trying to pull it out of his chest.

He registered that someone was trying to get his attention, but he ignored them, dwelling instead on the stupidity of his miscalculation.

He had _not_ expected this. The original plan had been to use himself as bait to lure out the Ame rogues, not Sakura. What would they want with her? How could they possibly know he'd coming running blindly to save her? The spy wasn't _that_ close to him, right?

Gaara groaned, pushing his sister away from him as she tried to stop him from swaying and possibly falling over.

Temari had just informed him of the letter Shikamaru had found, while her boyfriend looked for the rest of the leaf ninja. She could only imagine the horror struck look on their faces, the scolding from Ino and rage from Naruto… Sakura was gone, and her abductor had left no trace. And who knew what those ANBU would be thinking.

She watched the strange expressions on her brother's face: from rage to anguish, then guilt and fury – he had never shown such an impressive array of emotions like this before and it both intrigued and scared her. He had grown so much, accepting his feelings and letting himself _be_ human, but he still didn't seem to understand restraint. His natural façade didn't count – he got that through years of controlling his bloodlust.

This was different.

Temari sighed, not sure what to say to him: nothing she came up with sounded right in her head so she just waited for the leaf ninja to appear. They could annoy or placate him – she didn't want to be on the wrong side of her brother right now. Surely Naruto at least, would draw his temperament…

And speaking of the devil – the blonde idiot's voice was loudest as Temari sensed the arrival of the Konoha ninja in the Kazekage's home. The ANBU weren't with them when they entered the office without knocking. Naruto took one look at the devastated look on Gaara's face and his features softened. He knew that look, that pain.

"Temari," he said, instead turning to the oldest sand sibling. "What are we going to do?"

He wanted to go get Sakura – to drag her back after personally kicking the arse of every rogue ninja from here to Iwagakure – but he had no idea where to start looking.

"Gaara can track in the desert without a trail," Kankuro said.

All eyes darted to the Kazekage, who was taking that moment to move toward the window rather than listening to the discussions going on around him.

"The ANBU are scouting the area," Ino said, answering Naruto's question instead. "They'll be here when they have something to report."

Silence rang through the room and Gaara found himself struggling to breathe again. He gripped the window frame tightly a few minutes later as the Konoha ANBU entered via Shunshin.

The one he knew was Yamato glanced at him and then sighed. "We've found a busted plumbing pipe with Sakura's chakra signature on it, but her kidnappers want to be found, so I'm assuming they let her do it. Their plan is to lure out the Kazekage, and they've done it perfectly."

"Where's the broken pipe?" Kankuro asked.

"The southernmost wall leading away from the hospital core."

"We can still do this," Yamato said. "They've given us all we need."

"But the note stipulated that Gaara go alone," Temari said. "We can't enact the same plan without bringing along reinforcements – they'll see that coming."

Silence… again.

Gaara heard murmuring, like they were deliberately keeping secrets from him, but he didn't react.

Finally, Yamato gave a last nod to the Kazekage, despite the fact that he was ignoring everyone in the room, and to his fellow leaf ninja before following his fellow retreating ANBU.

What was it with the silence? He wasn't going to start attacking people if they suggested he bring along a platoon, let alone go by himself after all. Gaara loosened his grip on the window sill and closed his eyes, trying to hear what Shukaku was thinking as they started talking around him again.

"Well, they certainly know what they're doing," Ino said, pushing Naruto away from him as he glared at her.

"There's a time and place for admiring the enemy," Kankuro said to her, his eyes drifting between the blonde and his brother.

Gaara still wasn't moving, but he wasn't fooled – there was a battle was raging inside of him. "Gaara?"

The Kazekage snapped his eyes open: he was rigid, staring out over Suna without really seeing it. No-one in the room had tried to approach him, fearing what he might do – even Naruto had the good sense not to go near him. He wasn't taking this very well. He wasn't acting like a Kazekage who needed to find and rescue a hostage; Gaara's thoughts were that of a lover… heck, Kankuro likened him and Sakura to soul mates. There was no denying the connection between those two.

Although no-one had realised it at the time, when Sakura had left Suna to look for Gaara after he left, she'd found him without really looking. She'd seen through the ridiculous ideas on where he _might_ have gone and headed straight for him. He wanted to feel the same thing for her, but was afraid that Shukaku's voice in his head would attempt to lead him astray.

She had admitted to hearing his voice in her head – it sounded so crazy, but now that he thought about it, they'd left sanity behind a long time ago.

So Gaara closed his eyes again, hoping to get a similar epiphany. It wasn't easy, with the annoying voices in the room. He heard Naruto suggest Gaara comb the desert, while Kankuro reminded him that the council had forbidden the Kazekage from leaving Suna. This sparked anger in Ino about loyalty, friendship, and "screw the rules", as she put it. Temari's groan of disapproval and Shikamaru's sigh of frustration were drowned out of Gaara's head by Shukaku's voice.

' **I'M FLATTERED MY LITTLE JINCHURIKI, BUT THERE'S NOTHING I CAN TELL YOU THAT YOU DON'T' ALREADY KNOW. SHE'S WAITING FOR YOU – YOU KNOW WHAT YOU NEED TO DO.'**

The bijuu was supporting him?

' **IF SHE DIES, I'LL NEVER HEAR THE END OF IT – I STILL HAVE TO LIVE IN YOUR HEAD YOU KNOW.'**

But Shukaku wanted her dead.

Gaara waited, but the demon didn't respond to that. Instead, he tried to meditate, like he had been when Sakura and the rest of the leaf ninja had been on that mission to capture a rogue Ame ninja. She'd heard his voice mid-battle, and he remembered that mediation session had been intense…

He focused his breathing, but instead of reaching some sort of an epiphany, his head was suddenly besieged with whispers. He couldn't differentiate one from the other, and it was beginning to unhinge his calm.

' **YOU KNOW WHAT YOU NEED TO DO** **JIDŌ.'**

More whispering… Gaara couldn't take it, he shunshined out, ignoring the startled sounds of the people around him. And just like that, he knew where he was going… where the rogues had taken Sakura, and where she was waiting for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	27. The Shame of Sand.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

Sakura Haruno woke in the sand of the desert, her head throbbing, and her body weak. What had happened?

The last thing she remembered, she was heading back to Gaara's mansion. The whole thing was a blur. She moaned softly, realising she was in direct sunlight – it was hurting her eyes, despite the fact that her eyelids were barely open. She couldn't see anything except the brilliance of the sun and as she shifted; uncomfortably aware of the heat in her body, she found that her chakra was all but gone.

She had a modicum amount of chakra left that would explain its recovery as she slept, but most of it had been drained away; she still couldn't remember _how_.

Sakura groaned, blinking heavily through the haze of her vision, as something dug into her back painfully. It felt like a rock, but as she shifted, it moved with her.

"You're awake."

The voice startled her and she was half surprised when strong arms embraced her and lifted her into a seated position.

"I keep forgetting you Konoha ninja aren't used to the desert sun," the voice said, and the man (she was beginning to suspect he had something to do with her memory loss) placed what felt like a canteen in her hand. "Drink up: don't worry, it's just water."

As she took the offered nourishment, she heard him move around her. Her Kunoichi training was screaming at her to get away from him, to hit him and run or Shunshin out, but honestly, she didn't think she'd get very far. Her body was racked with pain and exhaustion; she didn't even have enough chakra to heal herself. It reminded her of that time she'd run into Gaara in the wind shrine… except here, her only wounds were those caused by the coils of stray sand that were attacking her person, like miniature sandstorms (no bigger than her fist). She wasn't as covered as she should be, wearing only her normal outfit and without a cloak or some kind of wrap to protect her face.

The Shinobi behind her seemed to be thinking the same thing as he had started pitching up what sounded like a tent. Sakura squeezed her eyes shut tightly, trying to remember how she'd gotten out here.

"Sakura," the man said a minute later, and she suddenly remembered the way he'd whispered her name in her ear.

Her eyes flew open, she dropped the canteen, and Sakura made to stand up; she swayed and Honshu caught her.

"Careful," he said. "You're in no condition to be trekking through the desert to get away from me."

"No thanks to _you_ ," she snapped, pushing him away.

"So you remember."

"What are you talking about?"

He shrugged as her vision cleared and he zoomed into focus. "I just altered your perception with a genjutsu I've been working on."

"Why?"

"You really _are_ a feisty one," he said, pointing to his leg.

Sakura stared at the bandage that had been expertly wrapped around his right thigh. Clearly, he was better at medicine than he'd let on.

' _Of course.'_

"I'm not much for the chakra healing," he said, correctly interpreting the shock on her face. "But I know all about the non-chakra kind."

"What do you want?" She asked.

"The Kazekage of course," he said. "You already figured out you're the bait."

"He's your‒"

"He's just a demon," Honshu said evenly, though the glint in his eyes frightened her. "Didn't _your_ parents teach you the same thing about that Uzumaki brat when you were growing up?"

"That's different, I‒"

"They're both dangerous," he said, ignoring her. "They'll just get more people killed, like he did when the Akatsuki came. Deidara was just after the Shukaku, it shouldn't have taken a third of the village to die to get that _thing_ out of there."

Sakura gritted her teeth, clenching her fists. "Gaara is not a _thing_!"

"I know you think you've developed some kind of _bond_ with him: but demons don't care about humans, and you should get over it." Honshu reached out and grabbed Sakura's hitai-ate, pulling the headband loose from her hair and smirking as she made a vain attempt to snatch it back. "You won't be needing this."

Sakura just glowered at him as he folded it up and shoved it in his vest pocket. She sighed heavily, testing the mobility of her wrists as she looked around, noting this tent was just a tarpaulin being held up by four poles. If she was going to be of any use once Gaara arrived (and her friends – she was hoping they wouldn't let him come here alone), she needed to know her limits. She was pretty good at hiding her chakra, due to her excellent control over it, so it was easy to fake being weaker than she really was. That was one thing at least, that she had going for her.

And the burning curiosity about her captor was nagging at her – who was he, _really_ , and why wasn't he enamoured by Gaara like the rest of Suna? After a few minutes of quiet it was Honshu however, who broke the silence.

"You could do better you know," he said, watching her in his peripherals.

She ignored his comment. "When Gaara gets here, you won't have to worry about what _I_ can do."

He chuckled. "I'm fully prepared for his wrath Sakura – I know _exactly_ what I'm getting myself into."

"What did the Akatsuki tell you?"

He glared at her. "And what makes you think they told me _anything_?"

"You worked for them once, didn't you?" She asked. It was a guess at best, but it made sense – the intelligence they had on the spy screamed 'Akatsuki'. There was no concrete proof, just circumstantial evidence. Still, as Shikamaru had once told her, the best bluff was one based on facts, no matter how thin.

Honshu looked surprised by her deduction. "I was one of their subordinates, yes. How did you know?"

"It makes sense," she admitted. "But it doesn't matter; once Gaara gets here, you'll be killed or taken in for questioning."

He just shrugged. "The fight won't end that way, and I won't be returning to Suna."

She just shook her head. "You won't have a choice in the matter."

"You think I don't know what he's capable of?" Honshu snarled. "I grew up in Suna – I _know_."

"Honshu, I‒"

"Your jinchuriki never went on killing sprees," he said, looking away from her. "Ours did."

That stopped her cold. She'd known Shukaku had gotten out and transformed Gaara enough times to make the Kyuubi look like an obedient pet. But the way Honshu had said "killing spree" and the fact that he'd turned away from her – she could hear the sadness in his voice and she shivered involuntarily at the mental images now plaguing her mind. That line was ominous and she tried to push it out of her head as she defended the man she was in love with.

"It was never Gaara's fault," Sakura said haughtily. "He didn't have a‒"

"You think I _care_ about that?" Honshu snarled, turning back to face her.

Sakura held back a gasp at the sight of his tears. Suddenly, it all made sense, from his anger to this untempered grief. She knew why he was doing this.

"Who did he kill Honshu? Tell me," she said. A part of her didn't want to know, not having been privy to the extent of Gaara's bloodthirsty nature before his fight with Naruto – though she had an inkling of what he'd been like, she couldn't begin to understand how the people of Suna had survived alongside him. "Honshu," she said softly, when he didn't respond. "Who did Gaara kill?"

X X X

Baki hit himself in the head softly, wondering if it was possible for brain damage to be incurred through self-harm. He certainly wanted to _try_. Honshu Uzunara was the spy, and had nothing to do with the former Akatsuki named Ouden Tashimaru, who had been at large since the fall of the organisation, right? He'd met the bumbling grandson of the head of the medical core and hadn't looked twice at him. He couldn't believe he didn't know that man was a terrorist, out to kill the Kazekage!

"Don't beat yourself up," Itsumo Nashika said. "I'm stupider than you'll ever be."

The head doctor had known his own flesh and blood had never been besotted by Gaara, even when the Kazekage's leadership had led Suna into a new, golden age after the fall of the Akatsuki. He hadn't hinted that he hated him either, and Itsumo had never wanted to believe that the young man would ever do something that could harm Sunagakure or her Kage. He was having a hard time believing it now.

"Are you sure it's Honshu?" Ino Yamanaka asked, voicing the same concerns _he_ also had, at their findings.

They were currently in Itsumo's office; Temari, Kankuro, Baki and the leaf ninja (even the ANBU), had come to get answers from the head doctor and he _wanted_ to help. He just wasn't sure if anything he knew could help. Sure, now that the possibility existed, he could see where Honshu's anger was coming from, but what did it matter? They needed to rescue Sakura and prevent the Kazekage from falling into enemy hands.

But strict to protocol, Baki was looking for answers.

"The pipe Sakura kicked, and _yes_ ," Baki said, as Ino went to interrupt, "it _was_ Sakura – your ANBU friends here confirmed the chakra signature. Anyway, there were traces of blood at the scene and we've identified it as Honshu's."

"Blood tests aren't that quick," Ino insisted.

"They're quick enough when the doctors are motivated to find out whose blood it is," Itsumo reasoned. "And I'm guessing that's not all you found?"

"It's what we didn't find," Yamato said from behind his mask. "Your grandson is missing, his apartment is clean – too clean. He's our only suspect, and from the look on your face, it's easy to deduce you've realised he _is_ the spy."

Itsumo nodded.

"So spill it old man," Naruto finally piped up, clenching his fists. "Where has Honshu taken Sakura-chan?"

"I can only guess into the desert," the head doctor said. "When he was young, he'd always seek out the sandiest places, and if he's no longer in Suna, I doubt he'd be taking your friend to another village."

"He wouldn't want to risk running into people right now," Baki agreed.

"This is all well and good," Shikamaru said. "But if we're going to find Sakura and figure out what Gaara's up to, we need intelligence on Honshu. Doctor, why is he doing this?"

Itsumo shook his head wearily as all eyes rested on him. "I'm not sure where to start. I can hardly believe he'd do this." He sighed. "It's my fault: I made him work at the hospital to keep him occupied – he was always good at getting distracted, and when he did, he got into trouble."

"You're assuming he only snapped after you did that," Shikamaru said.

"What are you saying Shikamaru?" Naruto asked.

"Think about it," the Nara said. "Up until now, we've been thinking this former Akatsuki subordinate named Ouden Tashimaru might be behind it. We were side tracked by Matsuri's weird behaviour, but the point still stands that Ouden could've had some hand in this. There are only three possibilities that I can see: one, he has nothing to do with this and Honshu simply took advantage of the Ame rogues' interest in the Kazekage. Two: he's working with this Ouden character, and the ex-Akatsuki subordinate is behind the Ame attacks. And finally three (the theory I believe to be most likely), they are the same person." Shikamaru ignored the gasps of surprise and stared at Itsumo. "Doctor, did Honshu live in Suna his entire life?"

"No," the old man said, suddenly realising what this leaf Shinobi meant. "When he was old enough, he decided to travel the Shinobi nations, but in search of what, I never knew. Sometimes he came back for a few months, but every time I saw him he seemed more determined and less tormented, so I didn't question it."

"I don't understand it," Naruto griped.

"About the time the Kazekage declared war on the Akatsuki," Itsumo continued. "Honshu wasn't in Suna – he'd been staying with friends in Takigakure‒"

"Which neighbours the land of earth," Baki interrupted. "And the land of earth was the location of the secret base Ouden Tashimaru was in charge of."

Itsumo nodded solemnly. "It all fits, but it's just circumstantial."

"Every piece of evidence we've gathered since the inception of this ridiculous investigation has only _been_ circumstantial," the interrogator said. That fact had laughed in his face over and over again.

"So, Honshu has a grudge against Gaara?" Kankuro asked.

"It would seem so," Temari said. "If he really is Ouden, then he'd been working for the exact organisation that wanted to extract the Tanuki from Gaara, therefore wanting him dead."

"Hang on," Ino said. "I thought _everyone_ in Suna loves Gaara."

"You have to understand," Itsumo said, almost pleadingly. "There were times when Gaara would attack or kill: it wasn't his fault, since he'd never asked for it, but people treated him like it was. However, the fourth Kazekage blamed himself, and too true – he should never have had the Tanuki sealed inside his son. But when Gaara made an effort as a child, to get along with people, they didn't see him as human; they only knew the bloodlust. After he fled the village, the citizens eventually stopped having to look over their shoulders and wonder who was going to be killed next."

"Then he came back," Shikamaru said, and the old man nodded.

"The fourth couldn't control him, but eventually he saw the control Gaara had started to wield himself and decided to call off the assassins on his son. The village was again host to the Tanuki, but it did not rampage again – Gaara had complete control."

"That's why he was able to gain respect from the village," Ino said.

"Yes," Itsumo replied.

"As interesting as that is," Naruto said sarcastically, "we still need to know what that Honshu guy will do next."

"It's obvious," Baki told him. "He's handing the Kazekage over to the Amegakure rogues."

"More than that," Itsumo said so softly they almost didn't hear him. "Honshu has never forgiven Gaara for what happened the night his mother died."

X X X

"I was watching from my bedroom window," Honshu said, gazing out over the desert. "My parents were ninja; mother and father were both sent out when that freak let Shukaku out and attacked Suna. I could see the rising sand and gathering debris, not knowing what was going on. The screams I heard weren't human – I could never picture a _person_ letting out a screech _that_ unearthly. It was that monster… always the monster. I was fourteen, how could I have known he would…"

He trailed off, blinking heavily at the sun as it warmed his face. His natural elemental affinity was earth, but he always enjoyed the feel of the sun on him more than tossing rocks. He glanced at Sakura, noting the sadness in her eyes, and continued.

"She always held me when my father told her to just let me cry," he whispered. "She loved me: she took care of me. I was always the weakest, always the one picked on, and after that night, after the demon came out, nobody wanted to hold me anymore…"

He trailed off again, and Sakura bit her bottom lip to keep from letting out a soft whimper. It wasn't what Honshu was saying (though she could definitely sympathise) but more of _how_ he said it that tore at her. He spoke low, like a child would, but with underlining venom in his voice no innocent child could ever muster. It broke her heart – the Shinobi of the past played with people's lives, never once thinking about the little people who got caught in the wake of their grasp at more power. They could claim until their dying breath it was for their village but Sakura never believed it – darkness never helped anyone doing anything right.

In fact, he reminded her of the tormented look on Gaara's face when said red head lost himself in his thoughts of the days he'd let Shukaku run havoc. The two had more in common than they realised, and probably more than Honshu would ever want to admit.

But Honshu was beyond reasoning with. Losing the people precious to you did that to a person.

X X X

"It was the night Yashamaru died," Temari said. "I remember that dad told us to stay inside while he went to deal with something and we weren't to even look out the windows until he came back."

"What was it?" Naruto asked, not catching on.

Kankuro inhaled deeply. "Gaara let Shukaku out on Suna."

"On purpose?" Ino asked, surprised.

"He was just a kid," Baki said defensively. "And he'd just lost someone precious to him – he had so little control over Shukaku at the time as it was."

"Still doesn't," Ino murmured, thinking about what the Kazekage had done to her best friend.

A few curious glances were cast her way (Kankuro, Baki and Itsumo), and she was spared further scrutiny when a Suna ANBU entered without warning and nodded to Baki.

"We've found the Kazekage's trail," the man said, handing over a piece of cloth to the interrogator.

Baki stared down at it – it was covered in chakra infused sand.

Temari sighed as Kankuro grinned. The middle child was excited. "He's left us a way to find him."

Shikamaru reached out and fingered the grains of sand on the cloth. "Chakra bread crumbs," he mumbled softly.

X X X

When Shukaku had control of Gaara, it spoke through him, making them one and the same. He remembered now, whispering Sakura's name with his voice but not his mouth. There was a reason Shukaku had called out for her – it never did anything with no underlying purpose – but he hadn't realised at the time his demon was trying to call the person it considered his mate.

Shukaku wanted Sakura dead… it wanted Gaara to suffer. But somewhere in its twisted mind, the Tanuki was entranced by her. It might've been Gaara's feelings for her filtering down to it like the demon's lust seeping into him that day in the wind shrine two years ago. This was an interesting development and made Gaara curious about its current intentions toward her, but that would have to wait.

He'd left a marker for the tracker ninja, with a clear chakra trail to follow, and was currently using the sand of the desert to speed his race through the desert. But he couldn't stop the musing in his head.

Sakura had told him of his voice in her head, but neither of them understood _how_ it had happened. Kankuro said they were soul mates, and while this prospect excited the red head beyond measure, he now believed the capabilities of Shukaku were to blame. His father had had the Tanuki placed in him because he was compatible with the beast – Temari and Kankuro fell short on that one. Despite his early years, in which he lost control of his sand when emotional, Gaara's affinity with Shukaku was obvious from the very beginning.

They merged well even when fighting each other.

The evidence was right there: the lust Shukaku had felt in the wind shrine filtering down into _him_ , creating the urge and very act of the violation of Sakura. And Gaara's feelings for the pinkette had somehow translated into Shukaku's interest in her. It stood to reason that demons would see emotions as a sign of weakness, so the Tanuki would be eager to destroy something or someone its host had grown "attached" to. It had to have been Gaara's bond with Shukaku that created the whisper in Sakura's head.

But he wasn't ignoring Sakura's hold on _him_. Even before his feelings for her had developed, he'd always noticed the pinkette – he never admitted this obscure fascination for her, even to himself. It wasn't until his fight with Naruto outside of Konoha that the possibility of letting love back into his life, that he could've taken it seriously anyway. He remembered back when Matsuri had been kidnapped, how Sakura had healed him; her skills were further along when compared to the little girl who'd lamely defended that Uchiha, knowing she'd most likely be killed.

She was… fascinating.

Gaara slowed his pace, sensing Sakura's chakra up ahead. There were no signs of anyone but her and Honshu… surprised but indifferent to the identity of Sakura's kidnapper, he moved gracefully toward them.

Only now did he understand why Sakura had almost died that day. If the Ame rogues wanted him in return for the woman he loved, it was what they were going to get.

She remained on the ground at the Kazekage's approach, clearly too drained to move very far, and Gaara growled angrily at Honshu. But the man was not perturbed. He stood, suddenly composed and _very_ confident; he had been looking forward to this for years.

"It's time."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment/kudo. :)


	28. What Love Is.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to THE MONSTER WITHIN. When Gaara and Sakura reunite for the first time for almost 2 years after he raped her, this sets off a chain of events that will once again stir the demon within. Occasional dark themes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter. Hope you all love. :)

"It's time."

The sand sweeping between Gaara and Honshu was just earth: a powdered version that either of them could take advantage of. The wind picked up, obscuring Sakura's view as she watched them – they became nothing more than indistinct shadows to her. She growled audibly at the thought of not knowing _everything_ that was happening.

Sakura stood shakily as her lover attacked.

Honshu's element was earth, and he put it to good use immediately, blocking off the first wave of sand, and then shifting the contours of the ground; with a similar effect to Sakura's chakra fist into the earth, the terrain shook and tore apart. He only needed to distract the Tanuki, not defeat him, so he threw everything he had into the fight.

Gaara tried to rein in his emotions, knowing that Shukaku was watching and waiting, with every intention of looking for its way in. He was here to get Sakura, to kill Honshu and… no, he didn't want the man dead. He just wanted answers. But first, he needed to take control of this battlefield.

He spun his sand, testing the medic, to see how he'd react to the more violent whips of his sand. But their elements were too closely associated, so neither of them could do too much damage on the other. Gaara's attacks were more powerful, Honshu's more devious – in the end, it didn't sit well with the Kazekage. His ultimate defence was a last ditch trump card, so he remained on the offensive, sweeping his chakra infused sand around himself, like a billowing cloud, while gathering more from the surplus now swirling around them.

Honshu was already bored of this. He had no intention of draining himself, and a lot of his attacks required more chakra than Gaara's. His medic training gave him an edge with chakra control, but one more hand sign later, and he was getting more and more frustrated with this.

' _Where the hell are they?'_

His question was answered a moment later when he sensed the incoming chakra signatures, and Honshu smirked at the Kazekage. "As much as I'd love to tear your head from your shoulders, Lord Gaara, this fight is over."

"It's only just beginning," Gaara said. But he narrowed his eyes at Honshu's words nonetheless. The man was up to something.

"The great fifth Kazekage has yet to notice we're not alone," Honshu said mockingly. "I suppose the legends about your control over sand were overrated after all."

Jerking his head to the side, Gaara realised Honshu had just been distracting him – some kind of earth jutsu (or wind, he wasn't sure) had cut off the immediate area, so he was only just now realising what kind of trap this was.

His eyes darted away from Honshu, settling on the general area he knew Sakura to be (he couldn't see through the sand anymore). She was watching them, he knew it, but he had no guarantee that Honshu would leave her alone if he went with him.

Shukaku screamed at him and Gaara doubled over, hugging his head as the dark haired man in front of him laughed. It was digging its claws into him and he couldn't pull away.

' _Sakura…'_

He had a vague sense that there were now others surrounding him, and their chakras were forming a seal around his body. And then there was nothing: nothing but the black, the pain, and the deep cold that came over him when Shukaku asserted control.

' **COME ON JIDŌ, YOU KNOW YOU LOVE IT WHEN I DO THIS.'**

' _Love..?'_

– **Flashback –**

_That was it – she was finished. Sakura's work here was done, and in the morning, she'd be leaving Suna with the rest of the leaf ninja still in the sand village. A heavy weight of regret sank into her as she finished packing the last of the medical supplies. She would miss this place, having been here for months now. Despite the depravity of what had been done to the village, she'd enjoyed her time here and was sad it was finally coming to an end. But unless another Akatsuki member was to suddenly attack, she didn't need to be here anymore._

_She shivered at that thought._

" _Are you cold, Sakura-san?"_

_Gaara's voice was pleasant, but startled her nonetheless. He'd entered the open doorway to her office and lost in her thoughts, she hadn't noticed him. Well, it was no longer her office, and he didn't need permission to enter anyway, but she loved that he always waited for it. But with him standing in the doorway like that, she always felt uncomfortable – she didn't outrank him, but sometimes he acted like she did._

" _Gaara-sama."_

" _Sakura-san‒"_

" _We're friends Kazekage-sama," she said lightly. "Please just call me Sakura."_

_The corner of his face twitched at this. She'd been trying to get him to call her Sakura for months – they'd spent time together, like friends did, with or without others like Temari and Ino coming along. But he'd yet to drop the honorifics; she was still adding "sama" or "denka" to the end of his title – though the latter was definitely just to tease him, (it was used for non-sovereign royalty,_ _ not _ _the Kazekage)._

_He would drop the honorifics when she did._

_But Gaara had more pressing matters; he needed something from this baffling but intriguing Kunoichi. He had become a sort of confidante of hers while she was here, so he felt like he could finally ask this of her._

" _Sakura-san," he said gently, moving into the room when she waved her hand at him. "I'm curious about something."_

" _Yes?" She asked, when he didn't elaborate._

_He kept his face impassive, despite the building nerves inside of him. "Love."_

" _Love?" Sakura asked, raising her eyebrows at the Kazekage._

_He didn't know about love? She'd heard from Naruto how his uncle had betrayed him, his father tried to kill him, and he'd gone on from Yashamaru's betrayal to believe that no-one had ever loved him, but to not understand the actual concept?_

" _It's been explained to me," he said, feeling grouchy all of a sudden. "But, I wanted to know what you…"_

_He drifted off and she took pity on him, smiling slightly._

" _Familial or sexual?"_

_He frowned. "I'm familiar with the concept of both."_

" _So you want to know about being in love then?" She asked._

_Gaara fell silent, confused by her words. He thought back over the things Yashamaru had explained to him, along with some "concerns" Temari had voiced with him after he'd become Kazekage and decided Sakura just wasn't explaining herself properly._

" _I know about family," he said, still not entirely sure what she meant. "And… sex."_

_She bit her bottom lip to keep from smiling – it wasn't really the time or place for making fun of him. "There's a difference."_

" _I doubt it," he said._

_Sakura blushed. "W-well, Kazekage-sama, when you're in love with someone, it's not like sibling love. For instance, you wouldn't make out with Temari, would you?"_

_Gaara felt woozy at the thought of that. "Or Kankuro," he added, shaking his head, trying to rid himself of those disgusting thoughts._

_Sakura giggled nervously. "No, not him either."_

" _Would you?" He asked, and she growled softly._

" _What exactly do you mean by that?" She asked, annoyed._

_His eyes drifted toward her clenched fists before settling on her face. "Is Kankuro someone you'd make out with?"_

" _Oh," she shook her head. "N-no," she stammered. "Kaze‒"_

" _If we are indeed friends," he interrupted. "Then I would prefer you call me Gaara."_

" _Okay."_

_He wasn't sure she actually meant that. "Why not?"_

" _Are you asking me out for him?"_

" _No."_

_She smirked. "Well, I prefer less sleaze and more actual charm anyway. But, love isn't something you can define – it's just a feeling. If there were any words that could remotely describe it, they are perhaps devotion and affection – some kind of connection… eh, I'm not explaining it properly."_

_He wanted to say 'like what you have for the Uchiha?', but didn't want to get on her bad side before she left for Konoha. Remembering that he wouldn't be seeing her again for a long time after tomorrow, Gaara decided he wanted to spend more time with her, while he could._

" _Temari is organising a get together tonight," he lied, knowing his sister was probably up to it anyway – he would just have to make sure it was happening. "Are you going?"_

_Sakura nodded. "Of course: I've already been invited."_

' _Temari's on the ball_ _,' he thought, grateful for the first time in his life that his sister had a thing for social assemblies._

_Temari had grown close with the leaf ninja who came and went over the past few months – more so with Ino and Sakura, who were the only ones other than Naruto and Shikamaru who hadn't even returned to Konoha since their first arrival in the sand._

_Sakura turned away from him and lifted the last of the supplies she was returning to the storage building, grunting slightly at the weight of it._

" _Can I‒"_

" _I'm fine,_ _Gaara_ _," she emphasized his name and he shivered involuntarily (thankfully, she didn't seem to notice). "I'll see you at the party tonight."_

_He watched as she carted the heavy plastic container out of her now empty office, thinking about their discussion on love. He didn't think he'd ever be able to admit it out loud, considering she was still infatuated by that Uchiha, but he was feeling it now._

_He tracked her chakra all the way to the storage building and back to her temporary apartment._

_Before using Shunshin to go directly home, he whispered, "I think I love you… Sakura."_

– **End Flashback –**

Sakura remembered the first moment she'd felt something for Gaara – though she hadn't fully realised it at the time. The way he'd questioned her on love had stirred up something inside of her. Looking back at it, she felt regret at not acting on it – that night, they'd talked at Temari's little "get together", really _talked_. She wished she'd have made some kind of move on him, that they'd had years behind them now, and that he had been her first instead of Naruto.

She sighed, trying to peer through the newest upsurge in activity.

Where had that wind come from? Honshu had made no hand signs, so she assumed it was Gaara. But still, that didn't feel right. She cast out her chakra discreetly, noting the incoming chakra of something like two dozen ninja – none of them familiar. Had Gaara sensed them?

A scream rent the air and then everything went deadly quiet. For a moment, Sakura feared that scream belonged to Shukaku (she just _knew_ it wasn't Gaara). The sand around her began to dissipate, and the scene before her unravelled dangerously fast.

"Gaara _no_!" Sakura screamed.

He wasn't fully formed, but he'd begun to take on the shape he had when she'd failed to protect Sasuke against him years ago. His body was still bipedal, and she hugged herself, wondering _how_ he could be so stupid. Why would he let it out? He didn't have complete control over the beast once it took over – he'd admitted to her that the more he transformed, the less he felt like himself. Surely he didn't need the Tanuki to take out…

Sakura jerked her head sideways, realising the signatures she'd sensed a moment had surrounded Gaara. The sealing jutsu they were forming reminded her of the ones used during the war to contain the other tailed beasts. She flexed her fingers, feeling the chakra surging through her, but it wasn't enough for her chakra fist. A few more minutes, and she'd be able to break through that seal from the outside – it had taken the shape of a dome, completely encompassing Gaara as he continued to transform.

The panic inside of her was rising fast and Sakura decided on a low level punch. She stumbled forward, ignoring the pain in her leg and moved to channel her chakra. In the chaos, she'd completely lost track of Honshu – he came up behind her. Again, like he had done in Suna, he started to drain her chakra.

"I don't think so Lady Haruno," he breathed heavily into her ear as Sakura immediately lashed out, half screaming in frustration.

"Let me go!" She shrieked.

Sakura felt his arm slacken – he wasn't at full strength like the last time. She took advantage of this and threw her body backwards, slamming him into the makeshift tent he'd made. Honshu let out a painful grunt, falling awkwardly and letting her go. She didn't bother to check if he was capable of coming after her, and ran toward the Kazekage.

' _One blow,'_ she reminded herself, and slammed her fist into the ground directly in front of the sealing dome – it was semi-transparent, so she could see a blurred image of Gaara, still in the initial stages of his Tanuki form.

"Sakura!"

As the earth exploded around her, pain racked her body as she felt something slam into her – the culmination of her attack against the fuuin jutsu not only shattered the dome but sent everyone in the vicinity flying.

The voice belonged to Naruto; followed in by the other leaf ninja and a small brigade of Suna Shinobi, he disappeared in a flash of yellow, reappearing behind Sakura as she fell.

Naruto grunted, embracing his friend from behind and breaking her fall. He fell gracelessly, using his chakra to slow down their fall. Sakura was disorientated for a moment, and squinted as the sand around her again whirled around her. Gaara was losing control. Forgetting the blonde who had most likely just saved her life, Sakura jumped up and ran away from him. Ignoring the waves of chakra infused sand billowing out like storm clouds, she darted away from Naruto, who was yelling at her now – what he was saying she couldn't hear over the sand tempest now engulfing the last of the Amegakure rogues.

Honshu's voice called out as well, moments before the sand ripped through him as well – the only enemy now was Shukaku.

Ribbons of sand were flailing in the air, lashing out at everything and everyone that got close. Sakura could see Gaara at the dead centre of the storm, and by the look on his face, he was struggling; Shukaku hadn't taken him over completely.

She focused chakra to her feet, stopping the wind from pushing her backwards and used it to run faster. In the moments before she reached him, Gaara's body shuddered and one of the arms of sand fell away from him. Sakura threw herself at Gaara as his body started to take back its original form. Her arms could fit around his torso now, and she sobbed into his chest, begging for him to stop. A low growl shook his body and she looked up into the black and pale yellow eyes of Shukaku.

The smile on Gaara's face was twisted, and for a second Sakura was sure it was Shukaku looking back at her. But he collapsed on top of her the next instant, the sand completely gone now. Sakura held him tightly, lifting his face to kiss him. He was exhausted, and neither of them noticed or cared that they had an audience. Nobody did or said anything to interrupt them.

Naruto for one, was just glad they weren't taking their clothes off in front of everyone – he'd been traumatised enough today.

X X X

**Epilogue**

Their arrival in Konoha was something akin to sweet relief – the leaf ninja, along with Gaara, his siblings and a small entourage of Suna ANBU all filed in quickly. The past three days of travel had been especially exhausting, so Gaara left for the Hokage tower alone (except for his ANBU guard – he wasn't _really_ supposed to dump them). Parting ways with Sakura, he left before his siblings could hound him and the leaf ANBU disappeared.

Yamato gave Sakura and Naruto a final wave before he shunshined away, eager to begin his promised and long overdue vacation.

"Come on Sakura-chan," Naruto said, noting the sour look on her face. "You're _home_."

"Home." She stared up at the Hokage Monument.

Shikamaru disappeared with Temari and Ino grudgingly let Kankuro half drag her away.

"You're leaving, aren't you?"

Sakura turned to face Naruto, stopping in her tracks. "You make it sound like a bad thing."

"It's not like I haven't realised this was coming," he said seriously, now averting his eyes. "I want you to be happy Sakura-chan."

"He makes me happy, Naruto."

He grinned at her. "I'll come visit you whenever I can."

"And what about your plans to become Hokage?"

"I'm still doing that," he said defensively. "I always said I would."

"I believe it," she said, giggling. "But you'll have to either kill Kakashi or convince him to retire."

"He'll retire," Naruto was confident, hugging his best friend. "I'm going to go tell Hinata everything that happened. See you later Sakura-chan!"

Sakura walked home slowly. She had spoken with Gaara about her moving in with him and couldn't help but smile, remembering the way his usually stoic face had lit up. Even after everything that had happened, he still seemed to think he didn't deserve her.

Unlocking her apartment, Sakura was assaulted by dust and darkness – her mother had promised to take care of it, but the place looked like no-one had lived here for centuries. She supposed it didn't matter though, since she was going to have to talk to the landlord about breaking the lease. It was all happening so fast, but the only thing that bothered her was that her plants had died, in the sun, on her windowsill – they were bone dry.

' _Trust her…'_

She made a mental note to buy her mother a book on house care and plant life, for her next birthday. She really wanted to just sleep for the rest of the day, but decided to clean up – the refrigerator was empty, so thankfully there was no bad smell.

It was evening by the time Sakura flopped backward onto her bed. She fell asleep quickly, and woke early, the rays of light that would normally pass straight through her window were impeded by dark red curtains, and she looked up at them solemnly. She loved those curtains – they'd come with the apartment.

Sakura showered, dressed, and headed over to the Hokage Building.

Gaara had said he'd spoken with Kakashi and the sealing experts in Konoha, so she guessed he was there. But it was only Kakashi who greeted her when she rudely entered through the window instead of using the door.

"You're not ANBU Sakura," Kakashi reminded her. "Don't do that."

"Where's Gaara?"

"With the fuuin experts – Inoichi can get you in there, but you have to say please."

"You're chipper," she said, stepping into his office.

Kakashi smiled underneath his mask. "Yes, with everything finally over – at least on the Ame rogues front – we can finally breathe."

"I forgot they've been pests for months now."

"Technically, they've been pests for two years."

Sakura frowned. "That group that attack my squad two years ago… were they with them?"

"Everyone seems to think so," he said. "But it's never going to be verified or disproven either way."

"Well anyway," the pinkette just shrugged her shoulders. She moved to leave again, but his voice stopped her.

"We had a long talk," Kakashi said softly. "Do you realise what the penalty is in Suna for rape?"

Sakura frowned at her Hokage. "What?"

He shook his head. "Imprisonment: just like any other crime, like it was _normal_."

"Kakashi-se‒"

"I'm not going to attack him like Naruto did, but I worry about you Sakura."

"But he's getting a new seal, and‒"

"I know – I authorised it after all."

"Are you saying you‒"

"It doesn't matter Sakura: it's over now."

"Stop interrupting me," she snapped, forgetting who she was talking to. "I don't want it on any record, or to affect anything between our villages."

"It won't."

"But you'll always think of him as a rapist."

Kakashi sighed, rubbing the back of his head. "I can't really help that Sakura, but what I can do is promise you I will never let it affect how I talk to him, or how Konoha deals with Suna. I just want you to be happy, even if it's with someone with a _disreputable_ past. I know it's Shukaku's fault," he added quickly as she opened her mouth to retort. "Which is why everyone who knows has been ordered never to repeat what happened. I just want you to be sure that Suna is where you want to spend the rest of your life."

"I'll visit," she said, remembering Naruto's words. "This will always be my home Kakashi Sensei."

He smiled back at her. "Who'd have thought the annoying little girl who used to follow Sasuke around would grow up before _I_ did."

Sakura laughed. "If you want me to take you seriously, then stop getting laid every time a pretty girl bats her eyelashes at you."

He raised his eyebrow at her. "Whatever do you mean by that Sakura?"

She shook her head and sighed at him. "You're a hot, sought after Shinobi and the sixth Hokage to boot. It's not exactly the safest job."

He still just looked politely puzzled, so she continued. "You don't want the Hatake line to end with you, do you?"

And on that enigmatic note, she spun on her heels and left his office. He knew what she was talking about, but since when had Sakura Haruno ever referred to him as… hot?

X X X

"So you're really moving to Suna?" Ino asked. She wasn't sure why she was surprised – somewhere deep down, she _had_ to have known this was coming.

A whole week had passed since they'd returned and Sakura had spent most of that time overseeing the team responsible for adding additional seals onto the existing fuuin on Shukaku. Spending time with her parents hadn't been pretty, as they weren't happy she was moving out of Konoha, though the fact that she was now officially dating the Kazekage had lit some sort of fire in their eyes. She wasn't sure what to think about _that_.

Sakura nodded, smiling at Ino. She was packing her essentials and would be sending for the rest later. She loved Konoha, and always would, but if she was going to make things work with Gaara, then one of them was going to have to move. He was the Kazekage, and with a brand new, six pronged seal over the pre-existing one. He would be leaving Konoha soon, to return home, and she fully intended to go back with him. She already had Kakashi's permission, and the official stamp approval to do just that, much like Tsunade and Jiraiya had years ago, when the Sannin had left the village to pursue other endeavours.

' _Tsunade,'_ Sakura thought, remembering her former shishou.

Shizune had the position of head doctor here in the leaf, and Sakura was due to take up that charge in Suna. She couldn't wait to show the sand how it was _really_ done. She grinned at this and annoyed at her question being ignored, Ino repeated herself.

"Yeah," Sakura said, turning to look at her friend. "Don't pout at me, we'll keep in touch and visit each other whenever possible."

Ino nodded. "Can I have the lease to your apartment?"

Sakura chuckled. "What about yours?"

"The entire apartment block is being fumigated for the umpteenth time this month. Someone's kid keeps bringing in cheeses or whatnot that are already infected with bugs." Ino shivered. "So, can I?"

"Convince the owner first."

"Oh come on, can't _you_ do that? I'm back living with my parents Sakura!" Ino wailed softly. "My _parents_!"

Sakura laughed. "So _that's_ why you came with me to Suna, to get away from your parents. I had no idea."

Ino poked tongue at her. "Of course it was, but I also wanted to make sure you were _okay_. You're heading off to live with the guy that raped you. I know, I know," she added when the pinkette went to speak, "it was really Shukaku, and now the demon is basically comatose inside him and will stay that way so it can't affect him anymore. But you know what I mean."

Sakura nodded. "I know."

"So…" Ino said slowly, after a moment. "Can I?"

"You'll be out of your parents place when, in a day or two right?" The pinkette was teasing her, but her friend was too distraught to realise.

"I can't stay there any longer, they're driving me crazy, with talk about settling down. And the walls in that place are paper thin! I can't bring a guy back _there_."

Sakura ran a hand through her pink hair absentmindedly. "So what about settling down?"

Ino snorted. "Don't give me any of their crap. I'm still looking for the right guy."

"Choji likes you, so does Sai."

"I kinda want to marry a civilian."

"I didn't know you had marriage on your mind."

Ino slapped her arm playfully. "Shut it billboard brow."

"But seriously," Sakura said, then turned away, and grabbed her travelling bag. "What does it matter if the guy you fall in love with is ninja or civilian?"

"Easy for you to say pinky, you fell in love with the _Kazekage_ of all people."

"Well, maybe in ten years, when we're both married with a couple of kids, we can switch partners."

Ino cackled and threw her arms around Sakura. "I'm gonna miss you forehead."

Sakura held her. "Yeah okay, I suppose I'll miss you too."

Ino giggled. "You'd better. And stop playing with me. Can I have the lease or not?"

"Sure Ino pig, have at it."

"Good, now get out of here."

"Ha ha."

"I just better be invited to your wedding."

Blushing, Sakura pulled away. "Shut up."

X X X

Gaara wasn't sure what to think of the black haired man. He was clearly insane, but in an aloof way. He knew about him before now of course, but had never officially met the man. Sai had replaced Sasuke and become an integral part of Team Kakashi, but as far as the Kazekage knew, he didn't spend much time with either Sakura or Naruto. He was confusing as hell – not many people could pull off that indifferent while still pretending to smile.

It was also unnerving.

All of Sakura's friends came to see her off, and she took a hold of Gaara's hand once the hugging and so forth was over. Kakashi smiled at her, his eye twinkling like he'd never been more happy for her and she too, couldn't think of a time when she'd smiled more. Her parents were sad about her leaving, though only her mother was crying of course.

Naruto held onto her the longest, whispering his promises to castrate Gaara if he ever hurt her.

"What's taking you so long, dick-less?" Sai asked Naruto, earning himself a curiously surprised expression from the usually stoic Kazekage.

The blonde knucklehead grinned maniacally when he finally pulled away, and chose to ignore Sai's prodding.

"Sakura." Hinata hugged her next, but didn't say anything else.

Gaara was getting tired of being stared at as the Konoha eleven appraised him – Lee in particular looked less curious and more severely depressed. Everyone was talking and he didn't care to listen, his attention drifting however, to Sai, as Kankuro mumbled something about "emo lovers".

Sai cocked his head at the Kazekage, trying to understand. Was this one of those moments where he was supposed to congratulate them or tell him he's not good enough for the hag? He couldn't figure it out. So he settled on a medium.

"So are you going to marry the hag?"

All conversations in the immediate vicinity ceased and Gaara decided he truly _hated_ this man.

"Sai," Sakura growled. "Shut up."

She leant closer to Gaara as Naruto and Sai bickered. It made her nostalgic for Team Kakashi. She sighed deeply, glad the change was at least a positive one. Amidst his taunts on Naruto, Sai let the word "dobe" slip, like he did sometimes to rile up Naruto, and Sakura found herself thinking about Sasuke. No matter what he'd become and how things had turned out, she would always miss him too. He had been such a huge part of her life and the object of her affections for so long that it would be wrong not to think of him on occasion.

The minutes passed and finally, Kankuro snapped at them both and they fell silent.

Shikamaru and Temari were holding hands – she wasn't leaving just yet, and they were both setting things up for the upcoming chunin exams. Sakura wondered briefly if Temari was thinking of staying in Konoha and worried about that – she didn't really know many people in Suna personally enough. It was going to take some adjustment. She hugged Gaara and he kissed her forehead as the "goodbyes" finally ended.

"See you Sakura, Gaara!" Naruto cooed. "And just remember, _Kazekage_ , hurt her and I'll _kill_ you."

Gaara spared his fellow jinchuriki a small, wry smile and Naruto burst out laughing.

"Shall we, _Kazekage_?" Sakura asked cheekily, pulling on his arm gently to bring her attention back to her.

He nodded and she kissed him briefly before all six ninja took flight into the waiting forest, leaving Konoha behind them as they made their way home…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaand we're done! Thank-you so much to everyone who has read/kudo/commented on this fic. I'm glad I finally got off my butt and posted it here. And conquered a small part of my paranoia that no-one would care about it.  
> Anyway. Love you all. Thanks again. ^_^


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